Here's how it works:
1. Someone makes a wish. Example: I wish I were not a Bishy Kitten
2. The person who replies, must corrupt that wish in some way. Example: You're not a Bishy Kitty! Primarily because you have just been assigned as the Deity of Cuteness
3. Then that person makes a wish to be corrupted.
Original thread is: HERE (http://clockworkmansion.com/forum/index.php?topic=484.0)
Just one thing, you can only corrupt a wish that hasn't been corrupted. So it helps if you quote the wish you are corrupting.
And so we begin!
<end edit by Damaris>
Granted, I "fixed" it, but you've been volunteered test it for me llearch. C'mere, it'll only hurt for a second.
I wish I could be in a good mood more often, but not at times where being in a good mood would be socially unacceptable.
Granted, you are in a good mood, except for times when being in a good mood would be socially unacceptable...now your just erotically horny at times when being in a good mood would be socially unacceptable.
I wish I could fly.
Quote from: GabrielsThoughts on May 11, 2007, 11:51:27 PM
I wish I could fly.
Granted. Just sit down in this nice, comfy armchair. Yes, right here. No, don't worry. Here's your in-flight meal (popcorn) and your in-flight drink (open paper cup of coke), and your in-flight movie will be.. let me see... Oh, yes. "Learning to Fly". What's that? Catapult? Hah! Would I do that to you? Of course not!
... Now, a trebuchet, on the other hand... *twang!* Oh, too late. Never mind. Enjoy the flight. :-]
I wish I'd gone to bed hours ago.
Granted, but you woke up moments after falling asleep, so no help there.
I wish to have the most comfortable pair of shoes that never wear out, never get too small or too big, provides enough grip so that I will not slip 'n fall, never falls out of fashion, is always socially and workplace acceptable, never gets stolen or lost in some form or another, and that I have the only pair in existance.
Granted. Your feet are cold, though, since they have holes in them.
I wish I had more evil ideas...
Granted. Unfortunately, you grow a very long mustache and a goatee because of it. You are mocked by your peers for the unruly growth.
I wish I had a legal monopoly on cheese.
granted, you now live in Wisconsin and own every cheese factory in the United States, Canada, Europe, Asia, Aulstrailia, and Antarctica. unfotunately you had a nasty accident with a meat slicer and now the crazy Howard Hughs guy of the dairy industry.
I wish I had wings
Granted, they're tiny little gnats wings that constantly get crushed whenever you put on a shirt.
I wish I could fly like Superman, and that there would be no way to remove or weaken this ability.
Granted. Unfortunately, you are forced to fly upside-down. Gonna need to land a lot if you don't want blood rushing to your head.
I wish I had Saw II and could watch it right now, uninterrupted.
ok, granted. unfortunately in order to obtain your copy of saw II you had to watch 50 hours of sponge bob square pants. you could watch Saw II uninterrupted if you had resisted the compulsion to jabbed forks in your eyes and hadn't knocked yourself senseless by beating your head against a wall..
I wish for an A on my English paper.
granted you now have 420 A on you English paper too bad they are all form your writing it. the paper it self only score a D
i wish i had less reason to be repressed on this day of all days.
Granted now you depressed,so depressed your now taped to the ceiling by a large pair of bolts and large sheets of dalekenium so the only way if you get down if only luck might save you.
I wish some people wouldnt leave there phones on so much while in the movie theader in the seat behind me or front of me
Granted, now they take the people who they would normally talk to on the phone to the movies and just shout at each other obnoxiously during the movie.
I wish I could actually get a tan instead of getting horrible sunburns.
granted but you only tan if you stay out of the sun other wish it's vampire burn time.
i wish i had a job that gave me plenty of time to come here.
Granted, now you're working with llearch as his own personal PFY (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PFY).
I wish I could have a Ph.D. in something that'd actually be useful for the rest of my life.
Granted. You have a Ph.D in breathing. Excelsior!
I wish I didn't procrastinate so much.
Granted, only not quite yet. Maybe tomorrow.
I wish I had more time with my wife.
granted... unfortunately you now are your wife's twin sister and have no memory of ever being a cardboard box.
I wish I was the happiest man on earth.
Granted. The pleasure centers of your brain are stimulated to the point that you're unable to function properly. You have fun with all three days you have until that starts to be an issue.
I wish for a compendium of knowledge on that incomprehindible creature known as "girl".
Granted, but when you try and read it you suffer a complete and total information overload, your brain completely shuts down and you become a vegetable for the rest of your life, or until the supreme court decides to pull your feeding tube... whichever comes first.
I wish to be psychic.
granted, you are now psyduck a psychic pokemon...an completely incapable of putting two thoughts together, which ironically are mostly "psy" and "duck"
I wish for a cherry turnover.
Granted, unfortunately it's in the middle of a cement cube of 100 yard dimensions.
I wish I had something to do down here in Alabama.
Quote from: Valynth on May 19, 2007, 11:45:34 PMI wish I had something to do down here in Alabama.
Have fun running from the zombie hordes. Wait... no, they're that way, too. Hm. Well, at least you won't be bored for the rest of your life.
I wish I had Mow-level durability.
Bam, you're a mow. :mowtongue I hope you enjoy all it entails. Your intelligence may take a slight dip.
I wish for a yellow umbrella. With ducks on it.
Granted. The ducks leave a terrible mess on your coat.
I wish I were slightly more observant at times.
Granted, Your are now blessed with many eyes on your body,All red and bloodshot and you cant even close them cause they contain no eyelids. Best luck keeping them all perfectly moisturized!
I wish Yogi bear would go away from my mind! His game on the SNES scared the heck outta me and caused so much anger!
hey boo boo, your wish is, like granted. As soon as I finish stealing this pickanick basket, and bopping you on the head with this basey ball bat.
I wish people would accept that I rock at pong.
Granted, but at everything else, your performance is always sub-par.
I wish I had time to eat breakfast every morning.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on May 21, 2007, 10:19:09 AMI wish I had time to eat breakfast every morning.
Yum, yum. Great way to start the day. Now you're up and ready to face... um... dearie me, you seem to have lost any employment, educational, or any of those other all-day time constraints you may have once had. (It only seems like a good thing at first, trust me.)
I wish there were more faithful book-to-screen adaptations. Like
Redwall.
Quote from: Caswin on May 21, 2007, 10:37:26 PM
I wish there were more faithful book-to-screen adaptations. Like Redwall.
Granted. The first one up is
Grunts, by Mary Gentle. After that, the public outrage is so extreme, everyone goes back to what they were doing previously.
I wish I had a better work environment.
(Funny thing that, I'm currently reading Grunts)
Granted, you now work for the US government. Great cushy job, good pay, and people who are afraid to move their mouse. Unfortunately, by the time your contract expires, you have to go back out into the private sector and fail miserably when you are handed fifteen overdue week-long projects and they wonder why they're not done at the end of that day.
I wish I could stick to a healthy diet.
Granted. However, your definition of a healthy diet somehow warps into carrots and celery only.
I wish I didn't fall asleep in school so often.
Granted. You get caught on a truancy charge, convicted, and expelled.
I wish I was able to get this jumpstart install finished.
:rolleyes granted, it takes 72 hours and you have to fill out a form or enter a pass code every five minutes and the upload won't continue until you finished every single form. Additionally you can't install the software over a network and are forced to do this for each additional computer in the office or home network.
I wish for a very important wish.
I sense someone doesn't know what a jumpstart install is. :-)
It's a network automated install process for Solaris. Sadly, I've been working on -duplicating- one, rather than setting one up from scratch, so there's a whole bunch of scripts I've been messing with to figure out what the heck I was supposed to be copying, and what the current scripts are doing, etc etc.
Still.. having Solaris on every machine in the office sounds more like heaven than a corrupted wish...
Oh, yes. Where was I?
Quote from: GabrielsThoughts on May 22, 2007, 12:28:22 PM
I wish for a very important wish.
Ah, yes. Granted. Sadly, nobody can tell you what the wish was, nor can you figure it out. Obviously it was important, but all trace of it ever having been wished has vanished as if it never was, leaving you wondering, vaguely, if you ever wished at all. The lack of an answer will pursue you for the rest of your days, and you will die, in the end, still wondering what you wished for, and if it happened or not.
I wish I wasn't quite so geeky sometimes. :-]
Granted. You are now a nerd, which, technically, IS somehing different, but the common person doesn't know the difference, and everyone still regards you as a geek.
I wish that there could be a sequel to Metal Arms: Glitch In The System. I want more 3-foot, half-ton, artillery-toting, adorablely-cute-yellow-colored, way-overly-foulmouthed robots!
Granted. They use your home town to film it, using real mechs, and your town is nothing but rubble at the end of the production. Enjoy watching the film in your battle-scarred hovel.
I wish I could juggle.
Granted. You become so overconfident in your mad juggling skillz that you attempt to juggle flaming chainsaws. One of them falls and... well... the rest is self-explanatory.
What? I said you could juggle. But I never said you could do it well. :P
I wish I had more good music to listen to.
~Keaton the Black Jackal
Granted, but what's good to you ends up being something that makes dogs bark at all hours of the night, makes cats screech at the very sound of it, and other people to wonder about what the heck is wrong with you.
I wish I had a working replica of the Batcave.
Granted. You're billed 3.4 billion dollars for a 1/256th working model of the bat cave. It'll be ready in half a century, barring nitpicking from super nerds and delays in the building process.
I wish I didn't sit next on the next computer over from that smelly guy. >_>
Granted, you now sit near a smelly girl.
I wish I was President of the U.S. so I could fix many of our recent mistakes.
granted but the bureaucracy frustrates you every step of the way.
i wish i could just make my own place far away form others.
Granted, You now live in the center of the earth and the only thing you have to worry about is cyborg John Hennry,your landlord.
I wish I could have time and money to get some proper,working and safe contact lences
Quote from: Zedd on May 23, 2007, 06:54:25 PMI wish I could have time and money to get some proper,working and safe contact lences
In a wacky new twist on that
Twilight Zone episode, time freezes. There
is the time now, and soon, you can see just fine... if only everything and everyone wasn't frozen forever.
I wish for a nice, tasty, and preferably not alive in any way pizza.
You are now the owner of the world's first mercury pizza, it's rumored to be the tastiest pizza in the world, so tasty, in fact, that you'll die from joy in one bite. At least thats the cultist's theory anyway.
I wish I could gain muscle mass without becoming over-wieght or grossly disporportional.
granted you now look like a five year old, your muscles are so compacted no one can tell you have any... lots of luck finding some one who isn't a pedifile to be in a healthy relationship with you.
I wish that I had the ability to read my cat's thoughts.
Quote
Granted. They use your home town to film it, using real mechs, and your town is nothing but rubble at the end of the production. Enjoy watching the film in your battle-scarred hovel.
(Metal Arms isn't a movie. Its an old Xbox game. And there are no mechs, just the 3, 4-foot robots.)
Granted, but the cat saw you naked a while ago, and that image stuck in the poor cat's mind. When you read it, you see that image, and a mental feedback loop is set up. You and your cat's heads both explode after about five seconds.
I wish that SOMEONE, ANYONE here knows what the hell Metal Arms is besides me.
Granted. Everyone who knows about it cares very little about it, and lint is the newest craze of the year.
I wish for ice cream.
Quote from: Roureem Egas on May 24, 2007, 09:40:15 PMI wish for ice cream.
In defiance of about half the laws of physics, as well as conventional and scientific wisdom, ice is converted into a creamlike form. It's cold, goopy stuff, with a bizarre texture that still manages to be all runny with regular water.
Highly gross. Totally useless. All yours.
I wish for resolution to all those maddening TV cliffhangers.
Granted. All the resolutions turn out to be a total letdown.
I wish my job payed more.
granted. However, while it looks like you are being paid more on the books, it is clear because of an economic downturn and cost of living increases, you are now earning less than you were before.
I wish for a magical Twinkie.
Granted, however you eat the twinkie before you realize that the nuke spell that made the twinkie magical activates once it enters a stomach.
I wish for rain in my state.
Granted. Hurricane Katrina in your general vicinity.
I wish I could play DnD with my buddies more often.
Granted, you and your group now playing World's Largest Dungeon (http://www.worldslargestdungeon.com/) non-stop... See you in a year or so.
I wish there were a way to stop hurricanes before they start.
Granted, unfortunately the device only works at the point that the future hurricane is a simple rain cloud, good luck telling the difference before it becomes a hurricane.
I wish I had an decent avatar.
granted, PM me later with specifics of what you want your avatar to look like, and I'll see what I can do, unfortunately you may have to wait a while, and you might not like what you get.
I wish I was amazing.
Granted, but everyone else around you becomes awe inspiring and so very few people pay attention to you anymore.
I wish I could have Meta Knight's sword.
granted, you now have it but like me have no idea what it is or what to do with it.
I wish I could make robots.
Granted, Sadly the goverment steals your ideas and want to take them and kill their creator
I wish ice cream headaches wherent such a pain
granted,the next time you get an ice cream headache place your lounge to the roof of your mouth withing a matter of minutes the pain is gone... unfortunately your toung is stuck that way.
I wish for movie tickets.
granted you now have movie tickets the the movie "back the the future 2". better hop in the Delorean if you want the make it there in time
i wish that i had a saber-tooth tiger for a pet. ( being metal that should be a safe wish for me)
Granted, you now have a virtual saber-tooth tiger uploaded straight to your head and it savagely rips your mind apart.
I wish I lived in a more active state in the U.S.
Granted. You now live in Seattle. As a garbage worker. Can you really get more active than that? ^_^
I wish that The Black Donnellys was back on the air.
Granted, but it's only playing on the air in a remote island in the South Seas where the natives are xenophobic cannibals. You're welcome for lunch if you get there, though...
I wish I had some orange cupcakes.
Granted. The were baked by RJ.
She hid Pumpkin Bombs/Grenades in the centers of each one.
I wish for Halo 3...NOW!
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on May 28, 2007, 02:37:45 AMI wish for Halo 3...NOW!
As you wish. Unfortunately, it's the beta version - still being in production and all that - and you can't play it on your system. As a matter of fact, your system is dead now. Oh, and Cortana escaped the confines of the game and is set on her path to world domination.
I wish for
Birdman. Now.
Granted, you're now being legally represented by Harvey Birdman. I dunno if that's good or bad, but... you can cover the bill, right?
I wish I could win the lottery after it gets over $100 million dollars on two separate occasions.
Granted. After winning those lotteries, grand drama stirs up as it is revealed that the prize was embezzled from various corporations around the world and someone gets the idea to accuse you of being a part of this scandal. It'll cost you a pretty penny if you want to keep anything.
I wish I had the notes or some idea on how to start my stupid essay.
Granted. But your printer's out of ink and your pencil just ran out of eraser. Tough luck.
I wish my friends weren't so pessimistic about the future.
Quote from: Black_angel on May 29, 2007, 05:42:25 PMI wish my friends weren't so pessimistic about the future.
Granted. They lay back, quit worrying, and adopt a general policy guided by such phrases as "it won't make a difference" and "who cares?" In the short term, they are indeed much more relaxed (although their peers find them that much harder to live with). In the long run, Earth succumbs to entropy that much faster.
Y'know, if anyone really cares about that.
I wish for
Gargoyles: Season two, volume two.
Granted. Thay are VHS, but the entire world (including you) has long since upgraded to DVD. Good luck finding an antique engineer to build you a VHS player >:3
I wish for Robotech to rerun on cartoon network.
Granted, however, to make up for the cost of rerunning a show hardly anyone wants to watch anymore, the show has been cut down to nothing but the intro and end credits to make room for all the neosporin and viagra commercials they'll be airing at that time.
I wish I had a loonie (Canadian Dollar) for every second that I've been alive to date.
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on May 30, 2007, 02:41:55 PMGranted. Thay are VHS, but the entire world (including you) has long since upgraded to DVD. Good luck finding an antique engineer to build you a VHS player >:3
Ha, ha, already got one. :boogie
Quote from: Netrogo on May 30, 2007, 05:39:55 PMI wish I had a loonie (Canadian Dollar) for every second that I've been alive to date.
Congratulations, you have a pile of money the size of Ottawa that comes to approx. five dollars American. (Alright, kids, let's play "count the math errors!")
I wish for a pet fish.
Granted. It's swimming upside down, at the top of the tank.
I wish I hadn't had that power cut that lost my post.
Granted. However it turns out the post had been a sacrifice for the greater good and mere moments later an electric surge, that was prevented earlier by the power cut, now flows through your pc then back into the power lines stronger then it was. It flows through the web and into the government offices where it causes a chain reaction in their databases that results in your name being changed to Shirley McLollypops as well as altering all passwords within making it impossible to change back without vast amounts of tax dollars.
you forgot to make a wi-ish!
Ooops, I wish for a delicious blueberry pie with strawberry ice cream on the side.
Granted. The chef ... er... let's just say, if I were you, I wouldn't be eating any of that. You really don't want to know where the cream came from, either...
And the spoon is poisoned. Sorry about that.
I wish I could concentrate on putting time into the work order system, rather than being distracted off to here...
Granted. Working on it consumes you completely and so you have no time for us, your family, or anything else for that matter. Been nice knowing you...
I wish I could control a zombie horde.
Granted, however the zombie hoard you control winds up being House of the Dead by Uwe Boll style zombies so you're now stuck with a bunch of hardly dead and completely retarded drunk teenagers who drink all your alcohol and can't do anything you say right.
i wish there was a wish for me to corrupt
Gah I keep doing that >.<
Granted, however I wish for something so hideous every person over the age of 50 within two hundred miles of it instantly has a heart attack.
Granted. You get Bill, in a tutu.
With no tights.
He still has camel toe, though. Don't ask how.
I wish Netrogo would pay more attention to the rules ;-] and remember to post wishes.
Granted, however this branches off into another reality where Netrogo memorizes all the rules of everything and through careful manipulation of government officials becomes supreme dictator of the world. He then gets himself ten pet elephants and enslaves you to the job of cleaning up after his pets.
I wish that I had super speed.
granted but but likes straight cougar using your speed brings you closer to death
i wish for my ones little pocket sun. ( and i don't mean the one in my chest either)
Granted. However your pocket sun still has all the heat of a full sized one and you're incinerated the instant it appears before you.
I wish for a mountain of cheese.
Granted. The cheese stinks to high heaven.
I wish for a free avatar!
Granted. However THIS is it
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v286/Netrogo/bananaav.jpg)
I wish for a pet monkey named Bobo.
Granted, however.... OMIGAWD WHAT IS THAT HE'S THROWING!? Oh dear lord, it's gotten onto the ceiling fans and... oh YUCK! ... You're cleaning this up!
I wish I had the largest font collection in the world.
granted but now you have no ideal what to do with them all
i wish i could pull others into the Internet
Granted. However in order to do so you yourself are pulled into the internet first. Upon arrival you blue screen, need to reboot, and accidentally get formatted.
I wish it would rain chocolate bars.
Granted. But they are Willy Wonka bars, WHICH DON'T EXIST! :) :P
I wish that I was a computer virus (oh man i'm REALLY stretching for wishes now)
Granted, however you're a very weak virus and you get deleted by AVG Free Edition shortly after you start your trip into the internet.
Also HA FAIL! Wonka bars DO exist. They sell them in candy stores here in Toronto.
I wish that I could smite my enemies with sarcasm alone.
In the beginning, it works. However, you are eventually faced with somebody who has no imagination or sufficient social skills with which to comprehend your sarcasm; a high school guidance counsiler. The intended target being invulnerable to your assault, the full force of your wit and eye rolling is brought against your very self, obliterating you.
Either that, or you get eaten by a grue.
I wish for a patch for stress addiction.
Quote from: Boogeyman on May 31, 2007, 06:28:35 PMI wish for a patch for stress addiction.
Such patches are installed on computers all over the world, making them stress-free, and therefore capable of handling that much more work. Naturally, the way the system's going, the fact that more work can be done means you must now put that much more work into these stress-free computers.
Break's over. [Tweet!]
I wish Steven Spielberg would make a live-action
G.I. Joe movie. (And don't say he makes a ham-handed effort to turn COBRA into the real heroes. I'm taking that as a given.)
Granted. However he only produces the film because he's busy with other projects at the moment and he hires Uwe Boll to direct it. Anyone who knows anything about films will know how truly utterly horrible that is.
I wish I was Captain of the flying dutchman pirate ship.
Granted, but now you are constantly annoyed by a yellow sponge with square pants named bob.
I wish people would listen to logic.
Granted, but since logic is subjective, you're gonna need to find that guy who knows the meaning of life and get everyone to listen to him.
I wish I could find my old Teddy... I miss him.
Granted. But when you find him, you see that he has become all moth-eaten, mold-covered, and various-insect-infested. The thing looks like something out of a horror film.
I wish I didn't have to corrupt the above wish. :<
granted, I do corrupt his wish and you are transformed into a protozoa.
I wish for some moolah.
Granted. Have fun with your singing cow.
I wish I could go with my friends to AnimeNEXT this year.
Granted, you just don't come back. Here's hoping you can live off of pockey and the occasional unfortunate otaku.
I wish for many bottles of ginger ale. OVER NINE THOUSAND of them!
(Subtext: Obviously, I wish to be banned from the internet for saying something like that)
Granted you receive 9,001 empty 2 liter bottles of Canada Dry. I hope you enjoy recycling pal.
I wish to know if I am insane crazy, or crazy insane, or if I'm sane and everyone else is nuts.
Granted. However the resulting development of a higher concsious capability of determining your own mental status shorts out your, incapable to adapt to higher thought process, mind. This leaves you in a permanent coma.
I wish Mr Bubbles (the pink dude on the bubble bath bottle) was a real living creature.
granted but he pops and dies then hunts you fore making his real in the first place.
i wish i had a portal generator built into my arm cannon
granted, it overheats and there is an explosion that destroys the universe... again
I wish I was the smartest man in the world.
Granted. However to balance things out every woman in the world is twice as smart as you, the resulting power shift of intelligence leads to the women taking over the world and enslaving all the men and treating them like cattle.
I wish I was kirby :kirby
Granted you are now Kirby. You now live your life going on dangerous adventures and fighting many enemies that want you dead.
I wish I wasn't so unreliable
Congradulations, now you're the responsible guy in your social circle. Welcome to hell, m'boy.
I wish skittles made honking noises when you ate them. Ha, corrupt that!
Granted, however since they're so small the sound is too quiet to be well heard and is virtually indistinguishable from the sound of chewing them.
(HA!)
I wish I was the biggest @$$hole on the planet.
(Corrupt THAT)
Granted the Earth's dodo comes out of you.Eventually you get so smelly that we send you into space and you never come back
I wish I was Peter Griffin from Family Guy
Granted. However, you find yourself in some kid's youtube AMV featuring every time our dear Mr. Griffen has been hit in the crotch. Have fun with that.
I wish for my own personal golem kiln a la Kiln People.
Granted. However my lack of knowing what you meant by 'kiln a la kiln people' leads me to make the closest assumption possible and give you a golem that likes 'killin a la killin people' so upon coming into existance your golem sees that you are infact people and kills you.
I wish to be head of the church of the triple fish god.
Granted, though one of the Church's first and most unbreakable edicts is that the head of the Church must be gutted, smoked, and served with lemon wedges and basil within the hour. Enjoy.
I wish the tornado that hit Muscatine Iowa had missed Greenwood Cemetary and plowed through the town instead.
Granted. Now the cemetary's twice as full and there's nobody around to visit it or tend to it, so it falls into a state of disrepair and overgrowth.
(Geez I feel like a bastard over that one)
I wish I didn't feel like a bastard about that wish I corrupted.
Granted. Now you feel like a, well, female dog.
I wish I had a little more time everyday. not a lot, just another half hour or so.
Granted. You get a half hour less of sleep every night, but you lose that half hour anyway due to wandering around like a zombie for a half hour after you wake up.
I wish I knew the secret to wealth, happiness, and everlasting life.
Granted. However moments after learning everything you are hit upon the head by a cliche falling flower pot which gives you a severe case of amnesia, leaving you incapable of even remembering your own name.
Oh I wish, I wish I didn't kill that fish...
granted you severly injured it
I wish everything in the world was free
Granted. However your lack of clarity leads to the words being taken to litterally. On top of all things in the world costing nothing, now every single person in prison is roaming the streets again. Every demon ever sealed for our safety is now free. The world itself is plunged into utter chaos as order has no control over those who would destroy it.
I wish for a million wishes.
Granted. Sadly, you've already used nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine.
Oh, sorry. I miscounted. Make that an even million.
I wish I didn't have to go sleep now.
Granted, you now have the ability to gain energy from various airborne natural sources making it so you no longer need to sleep. However shortly after you get your wish granted you head out for a walk and spot Ryundo Lee just as he hears you come up behind him a cliche flower pot falls upon his head giving him amnesia. The flower pot bounces off his head and smacks you square in the face knocking you into a coma.
(Wow I just realized i seem to favor corrupting wishes with comas :mowdizzy )
I wish I had an infinite supply of Pepsi Blue and Vanilla Coke.
granted however you can neither sell nor drink it
i wish that you would not grant this wish
Not granted! However by not granting it I have in fact granted it which means I didn't grant it which means I did grant it which means I didn't grant it which means I did grant it which means I didn't grant it which means I did grant it which means I didn't grant it which means I did grant it which means I didn't grant it which means I did grant it *universe implodes*
I wish there really was a Jenova's Witness Church of the One Winged Angle of Latter Day Summons, and that they had an all out war with the Jehovah's Witnesses.
Quote from: Netrogo on June 04, 2007, 09:51:26 PMI wish there really was a Jenova's Witness Church of the One Winged Angle of Latter Day Summons, and that they had an all out war with the Jehovah's Witnesses.
Better yet, they
win. Didn't see that coming. That angle in their name, though? Turns out it's 360 degrees. All-inclusive. And you thought Jehova's Witnesses were bad at proselytizing...?
I wish
Transformers: The Movie (the old one) had been split into a bunch of smaller stories. (Because dangit, when Orson Welles plays a planet-devouring entity - play what you know, I guess - I want to see it get some development!)
Granted, but Orson only gets paid through the pilot episode. All the other episodes have Drew Carey playing that particular part.
I wish I could genetically engineer rabites.
Granted. Since I don't really know what a rabite is, I'm gonna assume it's a rabid vampiric rabbit. Better use extra protection while you're playing God!
I wish I could figure out who pioneered the "long red coat" fashion in anime. (Chrno? Alucard? Vincent? Vash? Edward?)
the answer you seek is Vash, unfortunately this may not be correct as I'm sure you will realize the corruptibility of the answers you seek as you are now a goldfish, unfortunately you forget the answer 3 seconds later.
I wish for another take on the previous wish
Granted, but you do an even worse job the second time around.
I wish I could comprehend the root of all languages.
granted but at this point the languages have become to separated and muted over the years that learn the root not only does you no good but it drives you instant turning your brain to mush in the span of 60 seconds.
i wish for love.
Granted, you're now at a dominatrix party and everyone wants a piece of you. Hey, you always hurt the ones you love.
I wish I had more time to eat a healthy breakfast in the morning and still have time to get to work on time and still get enough sleep at night.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on June 05, 2007, 12:14:07 PM
Granted, but Orson only gets paid through the pilot episode. All the other episodes have Drew Carey playing that particular part.
Ha, I'd pay to watch that...
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on June 08, 2007, 09:39:00 AMI wish I had more time to eat a healthy breakfast in the morning and still have time to get to work on time and still get enough sleep at night.
Welcome to the North Pole! Have a nice life!
I wish I were the Doctor's next assistant.
Granted! You are now age casted to be a teen for rest your stardom! Muwhahahahaha!
Wish someone gave Kaskar a brain or least a wit so he wouldnt post so foolish like
Granted. However, being the sort he is, he now has to post, only now, he's posting obscure theories, and you still don't understand a word he's saying.
What's more, everyone blames you for the sorry state of affairs.
I wish I had been a little more organised this morning.
Granted. You now have OCD to the point that if the toast is not burned to an exact shade of golden brown down to its hexadecimal code, you are neutrotically paralyzed and unable to do any other work until it's right.
I wish I knew what everyone else wanted.
granted but when you reach my desires you are driven completely mad and lose your own
i wish that i knew why others are confused buy the way i do things
Granted, but after finding the reason, you immediately throw yourself in a loony bin.
I wish I could meet Steve Blum in person.
Granted, unfortunately it isn't the Steve Blum you were thinking of and you now meet Steve Blum White supremacist and inventor of a useless tool that would have replaced/revolutionized the plunger, if he hadn't killed his wife with it. You my friend are now a wealthy, influential accountant turned criminal, a stereotypical falsely accused black man for a white collar crime you didn't commit while working at Enron. you are in prison because the Vice President of the company set you up to take the fall for him. Years of leaning how to talk your way out of a bad situation has not prepared you for the beating Mr. Blum is about to give you.
I wish I could perform all mathematical computations perfectly and without error.
Granted, but now grammatical and therefore social nuances are lost to you so you can't even communicate your mathematical prowess to other people.
I wish I could put out large fires with just my voice.
Granted, but the first place you test this is in a city. It works, but the residents of the building across the street are furious about their windows being broken just to save two apartments. Better save up for a plane ticket to Africa - I hear they have great forest fires!
I wish acne didn't exist.
Granted. Everyone has terminal face cancer instead, and we still don't have a cure. Nice going.
(Since I can't think of a wish, my cousin Tiana here will will give me one...
ok)
My cousin Tiana wishes that we had tri-tip for dinner instead of hamburgers.
Granted, but it was cooked horribly wrong. Even the dog won't eat it.
I wish the the marquee function was actually useful.
Granted
Of course, this result makes things horrible for anyone with taste, and they all band together and make your live a misery.
A misery that slides from one side all the way over to the other, then reappears on the original side and slides over again, but a misery nonetheless.
As a bonus, they include a blink tag.
I wish I was able to concentrate on the work I should be doing, instead of reading the forum...
Granted, and during your long absence you lose your admin priveledges and your account gets locked. It was nice talking to you while it lasted llearch.
I wish I could be caught up in a celebrity love triangle.
Granted, you are now in a celebrity love triangle with Paris Hilton and Nichol Richie, and before you think that's not so bad, you soon realise you are Paris Hilton, and you are now serving ot her prison sentence...unfortunately, whle you were in prision, there was some sort of Hilton scandal unknown to you involving the Accountants, Cybercrime, Identity Theft, and bankruptcy, and when you get out of prison the Hilton family no longer has any financial resorces. once your prision term has ended you will work at walmart, so you can afford to live in in a closet sized Weekly with 5 other homeless people.
I wish for penuts to rain from the sky.
Granted. You get trampled by crazed elephants before you can eat any.
I wish it wasn't raining so hard.
Granted. Instead of rain, you have a hailstorm, and the hail are all the size of turkeys. "We'll be lucky if this hailstorm doesn't destroy half of Furcadia!"
I wish that this laptop wireless cellular connection I'm using here in Ohio wasn't being so fussy.
Granted. Now it's working, but the uplink to everywhere else is down.
Enjoy your wireless link to nowhere. :-]
I wish I could read faster.
granted but now you only have a 2 kilobyte memory cash
i wish i could maintain my supersonic speed.
Granted. You are able to travel at supersonic speeds whenever you like for as long as you want, but you also fly right over pretty much every dwelling in the world. You make so many annoying sonicbooms that the governments of the world band together and launch fighters, missles, and every other antiair weapon they have to shut you up.
And they succeed.
I wish that someone would make a GOOD movie based off of a big book (LOTR was pretty good though, the Harry Potter moveis are just meh, I don't particularly like them, and the Eragon movie was so ungodly awful that the director must burn in hell for all eternity for that abomination)
Granted, someone makes a movie out of War and Peace. But no one's interested anyway.
I wish I could turn a complete chunk of lead into an equally sized and weight chunk of gold.
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on June 18, 2007, 01:51:02 PM
I wish that someone would make a GOOD movie based off of a big book (LOTR was pretty good though, the Harry Potter moveis are just meh, I don't particularly like them, and the Eragon movie was so ungodly awful that the director must burn in hell for all eternity for that abomination)
Granted. However, it triggers the End Of The World As We Know It, and I Feel Fine. Everyone else, on the other hand, is a little annoyed at you.BTW, the Eragon book wasn't anything to write home about, either. Fluff and mind candy, but nothing serious in it. Heck, Maurice And His Amazing Educated Rodents, or even The Wee Free Men had more body to it.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on June 18, 2007, 02:10:59 PM
I wish I could turn a complete chunk of lead into an equally sized and weight chunk of gold.
Granted, only it turns out to be gold plated. After you sell it. Half to the Russian mob, half to the Mafia, and half to the Yakuza. All of them are somewhat annoyed to be a) short-weighted, and b) sold gold that isn't. I'd suggest running away, but really, you can't run far or fast enough...
I wish I'd managed to pack up and go home a half an hour ago when I started leaving.
Granted, but you run out of gas halfway down the Interstate.
I wish I had a little time to install American McGee's Alice now that I have it.
Granted, but all you can do is install it. You can't actually play it. You have far too many other things to do before you can sit down and play. Which should be in about, ohh, 10 years.
I wish all problems could be peacefully solved with the push of a button, but without anyone getting hurt or killed or mutated or anything like that.
Granted, but pretty soon new problems start up. Other than that, I can't see a way this wish could be corrupted. You are a worthy opponent. (bows)
I wish people would stop using drugs irresponsibly.
Granted. Instead, they start using glue irresponsibly, and do nice, sane things like gluing a shotgun to their forehead.
And everyone blames you, too, for solving all the problems and leaving people with nothing to do by hot-glue-gun shotguns to their foreheads.
I wish the forum goers, en masse, were more intelligent. Especially the next poster.
Granted, but then everyone gets into heated debates about important global issues that would make most global-summit-goers gape in awe, and, as most arguments on the internet tend to do, the whole thing invariably devolves into a huge flame war... but at least people are more intelligent about their flames.
I wish all people were peaceful by nature.
Granted. All people become peaceful by nature, but anything that isn't person becomes violent warmongering beasts, and all people are driven to extinction, because they were too peaceful to fight back.
I wish I could think of a wish to wish for.
Granted - However, you become mysteriously mute, illiterate, and unable to write. How curious....
I wish I had three more hours in a day.
Granted. But due to this fact, you also have 3 more longs hours of school each day. Bwahaha >:3
I wish I were the best guitarist ever.
Granted, your guitar skills are excellent...but your singing is horrible.
I wish I could adopt Xze after seeing that one pic she drew.... (the one which Xze in the box)
granted Xze now has the mentality of a housecat, and wakes you up at odd ours of the morning...usually around 1, 3, 5, and again at 9. Her whimpering gets on your nerves and after using the litterbox she has recently started rubbing her butt on the carpet, You take her to the vet and discover she has maggots in her intestines and infestation is so bad they have to put her to sleep....and then there is the matter of the $15,000 vet bills. (sorry Xze)
I wish for a flying carpet.
Granted...but it mysteriously catches fire over the Atlantic ocean and you drown....after being nibble on by sharks for 3 days.
I wish I could spend more time with my girlfriend. (oh boy to this one)
Granted. However, your girlfriend is starting to drop hints about wanting some space.
I wish I actually had more to contribute to discussions rather than haunt the place.
Granted, but in every single one of your "contributions" you make every single spelling error listed in your avatar and constantly forget to edit your posts.
I wish I had telekinisis.
(How should I take that? <_<)
Granted. You now have a psychic power that lets you get tissues from a mile away.
I wish my brother didn't spill anything on my laptop today.
Granted your brother will spill something on your laptop tommorow
I wish i could control peoples minds
Granted.
However, you can only control peoples minds when they're watching pornography, and only to keep them stuck there.
I wish I had a more eloquent corruption for that wish.
You do. The only problem is that whenever you try to type it up, it comes out as gibberish. Recording it leaves you with nothing but white noise, and your hand spasms whenever you try to make a video of the sign language.
Bummer, eh?
I wish for a stopwatch made of pure awesome.
Granted. It stopped.
I wish for a cup of tea.
Granted. Although, the tea is from and old Lipton tea bag that I believe dates back to 1976.
I wish I could stop getting old.
Granted, you died young.
I wish I could control the flow of time.
granted you now own an hourglass that does just that, only you broke it and it is unrepairable.
I wish for an autographed copy of the latest spider man move
Granted. But you can't do the "move" cuz ur not spider-man. :P :P :P
I wish that humanity had perfect recycling technology.
Granted, but everyone is still too frickin' lazy to use it. Nothing really changes.
I wish I was immune to sunburn.
Granted. Instead, you are hyper-succeptible to frostbite instead.
I wish mows were real.
Granted. Mows invade the world and devour practically everything, including people, since this particular batch turned out to be carnivorous.
Oops. :B
I wish llearch would stop making such awful puns.
Granted. As a result, you're stuck with the pun-ishment.
I wish I had had breakfast today.
Granted...but that was the last time you will ever have breakfast since you ate ALL THE FOOD IN THE UNIVERSE.
Have fun searching for more in an alternate dimension.
I wish that people wouldn't lie.
granted, the wealthy thank you for making it that much easier to exploit the average person
i wish for footage of whale flatulence, and a hundred pounds of whale poop was researched on the international space station.
Quote from: GabrielsThoughts on June 27, 2007, 11:34:05 PM
i wish for footage of whale flatulence, and a hundred pounds of whale poop was researched on the international space station.
granted but the space station explodes sending crap to a nearby planet ultimatly making the inhabitants mad and come to destroy your children and you grand children
i wish i wasn't so bored
granted unfortunately you are no longer board because now you are in pain. too much pain to contemplate anything but more pained. why is this? it's because you have somehow blunders into charline's grasp and become her new favorite toy of the decade. good lucky because who knows what she does with her toys when she's tires of them.
i wish i had more financial security.
Quote
because who knows what she does with her toys when she's tires of them.
(Who knows what she does with her 'toys' when she's playing with them! :erk :O D: )
Granted, your income, savings, and bill all stabilize. However, a bizzar mass robbery of everyy bank in the world occurs, and every single whatever of cash is stolen, plunging the world into economic catastrophe.
I wish I could be the Master Chief!
granted but what you can't cook on your own for the longest time you find yourself in the disney movie ratatouille and being tutored but a rat you wind up rise to master chief statue long before you are ready. good luck with that restaraunt you were put in charge of.
i wish i had been more original with that corruption.
Granted, but even so, that wasn't a typo in tech's wish. Master Chief is the hero from Halo. So you'd still make a corruption that makes absolutely no sense.
I wish for an unbreakable pencil.
Granted. It breaks the paper you attempt to write on with it.
I wish I'd gone to bed a while ago now.
(e_Voyager actually thought I nmeant chef? :erk)
Granted, but 'a while ago' happens to be two hunderd years ago. You woke up this morning. Congrats, you are the modern Rip Van Winkle.
I wish I could live inside an Xbox!
Granted. You're now 1cm tall and you live inside an XBox that has major overheating problems. Got water?
I wish I could have a useful and helpful super power.
Granted. You become a supergenius, and use your unlimited mental capacity to help the world. But you soon become discontent, and become an evil supergenius, and go to the stupid cliche of trying to take over the world. Some punk doesn't likes you doing this, and simply walks up and punches your face in, hospitalizing you so badly, you spend two months in a coma. When you awake, you are thrown in jail. Have a nice life.
(When i wished to live inside an Xbox, I meant live inside the data, so I would therefor live in whatever game is being played.)
So I specifically wish for that.
granted you are not a met tool virus living inside of Lan's X- box. when the games glitch beware the megaman less you lose your own data
i which i have not spent so many years in solitude.
Granted. You are now a beloved member of society. Popular too. On the other hand, you are now a misanthrope (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misanthropy), for some odd reason.
I wish my PS2 was un-broke.
Granted. But no matter how un-broke it is, it's still just a shitty PS2 :3
I wish I lived in a future where the world was made of chrome.
Granted. The whole world is made of chrome, even the food and water. I dunno if you can eat chrome, but no one else can, so everyone eventually dies of dehydration and starvation.
I wish I could own the world's largest pog.
granted you now have a pog 10 feet in diameter 2 feet thing and 300 pounds. unfortunately you receive it as lands lades on you crushing your legs and cracking your spine. get well soon
i wish that anime was not corrupted when it cycled throng america.
Granted. It gets corrupted way before it gets here, due to the lacking quality in art and writing.
I wish I could be a successful songwriter.
Granted, but you get hassled for the rights to your songs by sucky bands. In order to stay successful, you have to do it. Tough luck, man.
I wish people were more perceptive when one gives a subtle hint.
Granted. There is no longer a point to the subtle hint, and it falls into disuse. As such, people lose their perceptiveness since they no longer need it, thus making your wish pointless.
I wish for a sandwhich. Mmm, sandwhich...
Granted. You have a sandwich.
However, due to some misunderstandings, what you actually get is a manwich. And you're the filling.
I wish I had got a little more sleep. Say, another half an hour or so.
Granted. You slept for an extra half hour, but in doing so you failed to do something you had been fated to do, thus causing an anomoly in the space-time continuum that destroyed the entire universe.
I wish they stopped using those annoying Burger King commercials they have now and went back to the better ones.
Quote from: Rammenstein on June 30, 2007, 06:01:02 AMI wish they stopped using those annoying Burger King commercials they have now and went back to the better ones.
Granted. What a relief that must be, finally not seeing that creepy Burger King guy running around on the TV. Of course, that begs the question on where he is
now, since he doesn't have a career spooking people on television.
The next morning, much to your dismay, you Wake Up With the King. The same thing happens the next morning. And the one after that. Sure, "they" have stopped using their annoying Burger King commercials, but the King himself has other plans.
You'd best start getting used to those commercials - you're in one.
I wish I had a little robotic helper that would obey my every command.
Granted! You have a little robot helper that follows your every command (Named Techmaster-Glitch). However, during a freak storm he gets struck by lightning, frying the circuits that cause him to follow your orders. He then becomes self-aware and kills you.
I wish my sunburns would go away. They hurt!
granted they are now replaced by poison ivy rashes.
i wish that i could build a new pocket quantum computer that could be used to return to the past.( it's power problem not a processing problem.
granted you go back in time and make nastifacations with your great gradmother causeing you to be your own great grand father. there by makeing you resistant to the D brainwave.
i wish some one got the refrence
Granted. Said person is deeply offended and kills you in your sleep.
I wish my mad Fight Night Round 3 boxing skills were instead mad real-life boxing skills.
granted. you take your fists to a gun fight.
i wish i was the one with the smokeing gun
Granted. You get arrested, tried and convicted for first degree murder and live out the rest of your life in a maximun security prison under the fear of what will happen when you drop the soap in the showers.
I wish my cellphone was charged.
Granted. But the battery is one of those funky types that can get 'memory loss' and now it only lasts for 30 seconds every charge, which still takes normal time.
I wish Rammy was one of the follwing:
Less of a Chuck Norris Obsessive, or
Less of a ninjaphile :)
Granted. I am no longer a Chuck Norris Obsessive. Instead, I am even more of a Ninjaphile and you commit suicide because I annoy you so much.
I wish Tech-Dude would admit to the awesomeness of Ninjas.
Quote from: Rammenstein on July 01, 2007, 02:23:18 AM
I wish Tech-Dude would admit to the awesomeness of Ninjas.
(Oh man, please someone come up with a good corruption for that. PLEASE. Save me. I got nothing. :cry )
Granted. However, Techmaster, now realizing the pure awesomeness of ninjas, strives to become a ninja, himself. After many years of rigorous training, he still isn't even close to becoming a good ninja, and knowing his imminent failure, goes on a massive killing spree before killing himself. :3
I wish you guys would stop spamming the Arena. :<
Quote from: Rammenstein on July 01, 2007, 02:23:18 AM
I wish Tech-Dude would admit to the awesomeness of Ninjas.
Ha! I got one! Granted, I admit that ninjas are awsome. However, you admit that any ninja, no matter how skilled, can get his ass whupped by a robot!Quote
I wish you guys would stop spamming the Arena.
Granted. You are spamming it instead, and the admins and mods come and bust you for it >:3
I wish MegaMan was real.
Granted. However, it's an evil twin or something and he decides to assimilate you.
Sucker.
I wish EA would stop releasing renumbered and slightly changed versions of sports games every year.
Granted, however the next update causes your gaming system to blow up, along with half of your house.
I wish I was better at archery
Quote from: lucas marcone on July 01, 2007, 01:12:54 AM
granted you go back in time and make nastifacations with your great gradmother causeing you to be your own great grand father. there by makeing you resistant to the D brainwave.
i wish some one got the refrence
i doubt that mama Wily would have been up for that even in her prime or that it would affect little Albert in a good way... but thing Albert did seem to like robots better them humans. ah well.
granted you can no his a target at 400 meters but nothing closer.
i wish that i had more time for the Web
Quote from: e_voyager on July 01, 2007, 01:35:01 PM
i wish that i had more time for the Web
Granted, however all sites on the web has been replaced with pointless, boring news articles.
I wish this game had a point
Granted you now understand the point of this game and it wraps your mind
i wish that.i have my online powers offline.
Quote from: e_voyager on July 01, 2007, 02:40:32 PM
Granted you now understand the point of this game and it wraps your mind
i wish that.i have my online powers offline.
"i wish that."... alright then, the last guy's wish is granted. Your mind is wrapped - or warped, whichever you prefer - as well. Good luck using your powers now.
I wish I could eat like Kirby.
Granted but because your not kirby you get too fat to get out of your house.
I wish for a unlimited supply of ice cream.
Granted. People keep asking you if you've blown a seal.
I wish I'd been able to focus on coding.
Granted. It now takes up all of your free time and you no longer have a life.
I wish I had not just seen my friend's packet of NuvaRing. Scarred for life.
Granted. You've instead accidently barged in on an intimant moment your friend was having. So now it's scarred AND awkward for life.
I wish I was more sociable.
Granted. You were the one his friend was being intimate with.
I wish I wasn't feeling quite that evil...
Granted. You fell like a pretty flower girl instead.
Quote
Quote
Quote
I wish I had not just seen my friend's packet of NuvaRing. Scarred for life.
Granted. You've instead accidently barged in on an intimant moment your friend was having. So now it's scarred AND awkward for life.
I wish I was more sociable.
Granted. You were the one his friend was being intimate with.
Oh, I
sooooooo want to be over at Rammy's house to see his reaction when he reads all that!
Hey wait a sec, that can be my wish! Ok then!
I wish I could be over at Rammy's house to see his reaction when he reads all that!
Granted. I mearly laugh and smile, causing you to wonder why you wasted your time with that.
I wish that my shoulders didn't hurt right now.
granted. your shoulders are replaced by wax sculptures singing the awesomeness of zompirates.
i wish i were a zompirate
Granted. You are now a zompirate. However, since you are a zombie, you are now bound to the person who created you. Unfortunately, he happens to be a necropheliac.
I wish I was a ninja!
Granted. But you get your ass kicked by a robot, because robots pwn ninjas >:3
I wish I had a pet robot. (I think I can see what's coming)
Granted. You now have a pet robot. Sadly, it is defective and kills you slowly and painfully.
I wish you were less of a robot-obsessive.
granted he is more pirate oriented and because pirates rape ninjas we both kick you ass and hand you over to the very butch pirate ladies to do with as they please.
i wish for world peace!
Granted. The entire world is completely destroyed.
It's now very peaceful. Thanks a lot, man!
I wish I didn't have to get up in the morning.
Granted. You are dead.
I wish I had more Eyeshield 21 mangas.
Granted but their all in russian with paper that smells like caca
I wish Kaskar could see the light of posting properly
Granted, even though i don't know Kaskar that well. But for every "bad" poster made eloquent, two more appear. Now we have more n00bs. Great.
I wish my cat was better behaved.
Granted. But then you go and get a badly behaved dog, who eats your newly behaved cat. >:3
I wish I had a different cereal than four boxes of Cinnimon Toast Crunch for the past few weeks. Good stuff, but after four boxes it gets pretty boring :B
Granted. You have four boxes of stale Raisin Bran. That's what you get for hurting my kitty!
I wish a truly perfect system of government could be created.
Granted. But while there are no longer terrorists on Earth, because the government is perfect and now pleases all humans, there is an entire galaxy full of alien civilizations who envy our governmental perfection. They blow up earth.
I wish nerds ruled the planet. With our superior smarts and nerdiness, we would know exactly how to fight the alien hostiles.
granted. but the jocks still are popular and still smack you around from time to time. and because of the constitution you cant take any real action against them as a whole. too bad.
i wish......OBJECTION!
Granted, but.... OVERRULLED!
I wish I could control the position of the moon.
Granted but sadly you loose your grip and suddenly the weather pattern changes alot more than needed and all humanity is wiped off the map thanks to your new power! Way to go!!
I wish I could way beat that We love katamari game
granted. it unlocks ultra mega hard mode.
i wish for a bucket ful of used unmentionables.
Granted. But they belonged to your grandma. Sicko.
I wish I could get a large chorus together to sing Wierd Al songs in 100 part harmony.
granted though when weird al sings it bends space and time. when you all sing together the universe implodes......thanks guys.
i wish i could plop the bucket on ry's head
Granted. The bucket is suddenly full of puppies. Deus Ex Machina: 1, Lucas: 0.
I wish I could do cartwheels. Hellsing Volume 8 comes out tomorrow, and i want to celebrate properly.
granted. you are now blind
i wish i could burn all the "girly" manga and keep all the macho stuff on the shelves. we need more bad ass samurai. and ninjas need to be spayed and neutered.
Granted. You just got murdered by hordes of furious yaoi fangirls - my friends and I included. YOU CANNOT STOP OUR LOVE!
I wish I could breathe through my nose right now.
granted, unfortunately your nose is now an elephants trunk.
I wish for transformers to be functional robots in reality.
Quote from: GabrielsThoughts on July 03, 2007, 07:42:39 PMI wish for transformers to be functional robots in reality.
Your fanboyish glee wears off a few seconds after you recognize the Decepticon insignia on Megatron's torso. Not that you're still not psyched, of course, about seeing a real, live Decepticon, but it's hard to feel fanboyish glee when you've been blown to pieces.
"Such wishful nonsense..."
I wish they'd kept Frank Welker as Megatron's voice in the new movie.
granted but do to age he no longer sounds like the megatrom you remember.
i wish that i could beat at least one Finale Fantasy game without getting lost for about five hours between important task.
granted. however getting lost is a big part of the game so it takes you less than an hour to beat it.
your wish for nothing is granted.
I wish I owned the entire series of Megas XLR on DVD.
Granted. But with my Uber-robot power, I breaking into your house (emphasis on breaking) and steal the entire set. Giant robots are all MINE!!!!!
I wish I actually had uber robot powers.
granted. i have a giant magnet. you have a memory core. im going to have some fun
i wish i had wished for wishing for more
Granted, but it's no longer your turn so your wish is moot.
I wish I could train a whole bunch of cats to do circus tricks.
Quote from: e_voyager on July 03, 2007, 08:28:38 PM
granted but do to age he no longer sounds like the megatrom you remember.
You have no idea what you just granted me, do you? :mwaha (That, and he's actually reprising Megatron in the video game, which is really all the weirder...)
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on July 04, 2007, 03:02:36 PMI wish I could train a whole bunch of cats to do circus tricks.
You now have a whole bunch of fire-breathing, lion-taming cats. Congratulations, you've doomed us all.
I wish I could do this: :U
...without injury.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on July 04, 2007, 03:02:36 PM
Granted, but it's no longer your turn so your wish is moot.
I wish I could train a whole bunch of cats to do circus tricks.
Granted, unfortunately Caswin is ignored horribly and he kills all the cats in creation, including cat girls and the like, on the bright side he learned to do a cool truck with his mouth only it got stuck that way after the first attempt.
I wish I could travel to parallel dimensions and not die no matter what.
gabe's wish is granted. welcome to the house of M. mutants rule the world thanks to scarlet witch. but however it isnt resolved with her sanity. the hous of M reigns for eons and you (sapian) are made the B**** of a whiney little mutant brat that can shoot lasers from her nono parts. there is no way to another dimension. welcome to your life.
i wish i had made that coruption more malicious
Granted. Your corruption's much more original now, but you went with Gabriel to a dimension of flying ninjas, zombies, and cows. (pause) Dangit. I wanna go there too!
I wish I could decide what to have for lunch.
Granted. You decide to have shit :3 :3 :3
I wish I had a supercomputer.
Granted. You also have a power cut, and a power bill large enough to bankrupt a small country. Have fun with that.
I wish I had been able to avoid work today.
Granted. You are retroactively jobless for as long as you would hav been employed by your employer. You are also penny-less from years of loafing around at home without a job.
I wish I had a nice, big, frosted, freshly baked, delicious cake right now.
Granted, but it has such a high sugar content (that's right, they used real sugar, not Splenda) that after the first bite, you go immediately into diabetic shock.
I wish I had a big bottle of pure cane syrup.
Granted. But gastrobots come rolling into your house at night and steal the bottle which, to them, is superfuel.
I wish I was a supercomputer.
I wish I had every Transformers episode ever made for every season ever made, from the very beginning, on DVD.
The catch, of course, is that you have to go out and get it. When you buy it, the cashier at the video place is the captain of the cheerleading squad from your old high school. Gossip travels via her down a grapevine network of every unattainable female you have ever known, who then obtain a tape of you buying the DVD and inform you that they now spend a good 70% of their time pointing and laughing at it.
When you get home, you discover that in order to fit all those episodes they had lower the quality of the DVD, so you essentially end up hearing the sounds of each episode while only actually viewing one frame from each.
I wish for some manner of insomniac entertainment center in my neighborhood.
Granted. Sadly, it is quickly shut down by those who could get to sleep before you began keeping them awake with all the noise.
I wish I had some Cool Ranch Doritos that weren't poisoned, tainted, or otherwise inedible.
granted they are perfectly edible. but you my friend are now dearly allergic to cool ranch Doritos artificial flavouring. sorry the Doritos were off limits not yourself.
i wish that i was here more often so that my villain league role could blossoms into a truly monstrous incarnations of inner darkness.
granted. but people cant help but giggle when they see a three inch high pink mouse pillageing and rapeing their town.
i wish my car was an auto-bot. (i saw the movie. it's like an orgasm in your eye.)
Granted, but it's a Decepticon, and you hold the key to the AllSpark. And there are no Autobots on the same planet as you. Have a nice life ;)
I wish the Transformers movie focuse more on the actual bots, instead of the irrelevant humans.
granted but you have to switch spots with me in my wish. seeing as i wished for an auto-bot and you broke the rules by giveing me a desepticon you must now live with it.
i wish i were important
(He-loooooo! They're called 'De-cep-ti-cons'? As in, Decieving? Deceptive? Decieve? Any of this ring a bell? The decepticon tricked you into thinking he was an Autobot! Not my fault :veryevil )
Granted. But you are so important, some terrorist assasinates you. Succesfully.
I wish nerdy=cool.
granted but you still have to live with the fact that the only action you'll ever get is from your right hand.
i wish i was the terrorist that took me out.
Granted. But you foolishly didn't realize that this would cause a space-time paradox, and the universe anihilates 'both' of you to simplify things.
I wish I was a Protoss.
Granted. 2 seconds -before- you took you out, you took you out as well, in a suicide attack.
Whoops.
Oh, and you've discovered that the 72 virgins remain virgin. And you can't do anything with them. Not to mention they're all shrewish, and you're locked in a room with them for the next, well, until the end of time, really.
Granted. The Zerg overrun your base and eat you, with ketchup.
I wish I'd brought some lunch with me today.
Granted. It's a lamp on a bun. Yum!
I wish I had a decent Alucard cosplay.
granted. you are then beat up by all the cool kids.
(oh gods how many times has this happeded with various people already?)
I wish Lucas wasn't an idiot and follows the rules! He forgot to make a wish!
Granted, but then he makes a truly evil corruption to one of your wishes which affects you so badly that it makes you spend the rest of your days huddled in a closet, waiting for the corruption to actually happen.
I wish I could make gold bars appear out of thin air.
Granted. My little brother and I sue you for copyright infringement. (http://clockworkmansion.com/forum/index.php?topic=2935.msg128443#msg128443)
Sorry, but Liz's power was our idea.
I wish I had a few DVDs of Family Guy. And don't break or scratch 'em.
Granted, but they're all in vietnamese. Good luck trying to understand what's being said.
I wish I could kidnap Liz and use his powers to my own evil ends.
granted but two weeks late Liz escapes and oh my i hope you have a good hiding place.
i wish that i was able to get rid of the part of me that gets in the way of me achieving my goals
granted...as a result you loose all sex organs/programming, unfortunately you no longer have the desire do anything with your life and the result is the same.
I wish to have an A on the math exam I took today as well as an A on my (not telling) exam tomorrow.
granted but you do so well that the teacher figures out that you've been cheating, and they are really into the whole naughty school boy/strict teacher role play
i wish i had enough money to take care of current bills and health care woithout any illegal or humiliateing activities.
Granted, but you spent it all on porn video games anyway.
I wish I could be a successful ninja. :mowninja
Granted. But Rammenstien, hating you for eternity for making that wish, (because it's his wish) hires an entire clan of uber-elite ninjas that come down and ninja you so bad tha no one ever finds your body.
I wish that a line of robotic toy Mows were created, like Furbies.
Granted, but like the Mows in the comic, they're mindless, indestructible, swarm together, flutter, murr, and eat all clothing in sight. While that's good for some people, there are other people in the world that really, really, really need to keep their clothes. But since the Mows are mindless, they don't understand that, and the people who really should remain clothed make all the rest of us go blind.
I wish I had the ability to get something from nothing.
Granted. From the void, you can pull...shoes!
Wish modified since I now know why I was sick. New wish: I wish I didn't get food posioning.
granted. you're just allergic to all of it.
i wish i were able to sleep.
Don't we all?
However, since I have to grant it, have fun explaining to your boss at work why you were too sleepy to remember things like a shave, a tie, pants, or which end of the coffee pot should be facing up when you put it down.
I wish I hadn't skipped on buying some of the materials I need for my pre-college cartooning courses. It was stupid of me.
granted. you are now completely bankrupt.
i wish for a rabid flying unicorn with lazer beam eyes airplane wings lots of missles and really bad diareea that only obeyed me.
Granted, you are one of the four horseman of the apocalypse... if only the end of days had a consistent deadline you would finally be able to use the darn thing.
I wish for lots 7-11 would give out free slurpees...
Granted, but it's just a ruse to get rid of their most unpopular flavor: "Sweaty Redneck"... which, according to rumor, actually tastes like the backside of a sweaty redneck.
I wish I could create a zombie horde that only had a taste for producers of reality tv shows and upon eating said producers would go back to their graves until a new batch of reality tv producers appears, at which time the process begins anew.
Granted, however you get inveigled into producing a reality show about your efforts, and, in a moment of inattention, accept the offer.
I wish I had lunch today.
granted it was a batch of fresh, large, uncooked jallepanios.....have fun passing THAT out of your body.
i wish for the pure unbridled power of rock to be harnessed for the ability to power the entire world......thanks all be to al gore for the innovateive idea
Granted, but Al Gore takes all the credit for it until the RIAA gets involved and quickly bankrupts the entire project from their newest set of fees and lawsuits that come from the fees not being paid, afterwards Al Gore reneges on his statements of taking credit for the idea and then all blame for the project failing is placed squarely on your shoulders.
I wish I could live for another 10,000 years.
granted.... the earth however lasts for another two. have fun being immortal floating in space.
i wish my chemistry summerschool packet were easier.
Granted. The packet is suddenly at a third-grade level, but so are you. And you finish it so easily because you're a nerd. Ouch. Good luck having to hand over your packet to the bully down the street.
I wish I could go see Lordi perform.
granted.
so ya
thought ya
might like to
go to the show
to feel the warm thrill of confusion
that space cadet glow
well i got some bad news for you sunshine
lordi isnt well he staied back at the hotel
so they sent us along as a surrogate band
it's time to find out where you fans really stand!
i wish i could go see pink floyd in the flesh.
Insert the zot of a teleporter misfire and an unpleasant squelch here.
I wish for Chuck Norris to vanish. Or just the jokes about him. Either's good.
granted. all jokes about chuck norris vanish. but all those who are fans of the joke trace the wish back to you. and seeing as chuck is among them expect pain.
i wish i were the one to discover the next thing more awesome than rockin kirby :kirby
Granted! however, an italian research team make the same discovery approximately 1/100th of a second after you, tying both of you up in lawsuits for the next twenty years, the legal fees alone putting you in more dept then you can possibly pay off over your entire life.
I wish I could, at will, turn water into a high quality alcaholic beverage of my choice.
granted. youre now an alcoholic and push everyone you ever loved away because of it.
i wish for one fish red fish.
Granted, you get a red herring. It looks nice, but it's not good for anything.
I wish I could go back in time and "invent" all the greatest inventions mankind has ever known.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on July 13, 2007, 12:17:59 PMI wish I could go back in time and "invent" all the greatest inventions mankind has ever known.
Congratulations. Among other things, you "invent" (well, discover) radium along with a host of other wonderful radioactive things - and like so many before you, you fail to properly protect yourself, and die a painful death.
I wish
Power Rangers would end. Yes, taking into account that it's gotten gradually less stupid over the years, it's just... gaaah.
Power Rangers comes to an end. However, a show slated to run even longer, with even more idiotic characters and circumstances, surfaces.
I wish that.... uh.... well, damn. I wish I knew what to wish.
Granted. But now your turn's over. >:3
I wish I could get to sleep before 2 AM at nights. I've been having trouble sleeping lately.
granted, you can fall a sleep before 2:00AM, unfortunately you now wake up at 2:00am.
I wish I was an award winning artist.
Granted. Enjoy starving.
I wish I had a nickel for every dumb person I had to deal with. Then I'd at least get payed for it.
Granted, you are crushed when tons of nickles fall from the sky and land on your head. The hospital is more than willing to help you clean up the mess.
I wish I had a levitating disco ball of doom that obeyed only me.
granted it levitates about 1 inch off the ground. and only for 15 seconds at a time.
oh and it looks like victor von doom. enjoy your disco ball.
i wish i could find and open the treasure chest that holds davy jones heart so i could command him and his crew.
Granted. You are Lord Beckett (or however the hell you spell it). Have fun getting the shit blow out of you when the Flying Dutchman and the Black Peral double-team you at the end of the movie. :)
I wish that everything in the video game Metal Arms: Glitch In The System was real, and that the human race, after discovering some kind of star-drive, finds the planet Iron Star, where the surviving race of the three robot races who inhabited it, the Droids, live.
(I would prefer this wish corrupted by someone who actually knows the game, to come up with a creative and appropriate corruption)
granted, sadly the wishgranter knows nothing of what you are talking about so you are turned into the white cat from time splitters... or slippers, ha ha ha you suck.
I wish for someone to corrupt the above wish and completely disregard this post.
granted. this creates a paradox.....me redarding your wish to corrupt his but then haveing to dis regard that very same wish and not corrupt his wish and so god smites you to simplify things.
i wish for wacky arm flailing inflateable tube men! (if possible could a family uy fan respond?)
Granted, however you keep hearing a voice nagging "Peter, I told you that was a stupid wish" and then it never happened recurring only in flashbacks of an obscure event that never happened.
I wish for all programs on television to be pokemon related.
Granted, pretty soon millions of children are hypnotized into eternal stupidity by the gabillions of brand-new Pokemon shows, and mostly everyone disregards the good old reruns of the first series, either believing that they suck as badly as the new shows, or believing that the new shows are somehow better. This also kills all the other perfectly good TV shows out there - House, Nip/Tuck, Heroes, Futurama, hell, even M*A*S*H reruns on TVLand. You just killed the greater part of media culture, you sick bastard. And you don't even get to mind-control the stupefied kids, because you have been strapped to a chair and stupefied as punishment by those of us who remember.
I wish I could spend a little less time on the computer - without completely going off of it.
granted you spend one second a day on the computer. at normal speed and you are cursed with dial up.
i wish you could PIMP MY RIDE!
Granted, Black_angel pimps your ride... your bicycle... with a frilly basket and a handlebar bell.
I wish I could create an army of super androids who would loyally obey my every command.
granted your paper cup army is complete....rawr.
i wish for Xibit to be my big brother
Granted, but he shoots you. Hey, that's just brotherly love, right?
I wish I could create the funniest lolcat picture in existance.
granted. ever see monty python's "now for something completely diffrent"? you die laughing.
i wish my comcast on demand had more drawn together
Granted. But in accordance with equivalent exchange, there is now much less of The Colbert Report and The Daily Show.
I wish I could find everything I've ever lost.
granted you find those wmds bush couldn't and accidentillay blow the CRAP out of your self.
i wish i could have the power of the president.
Granted, but this doesn't happen for another 50 or so years when the president is reduced to nothing more than a figurehead who really doesn't have any power anyway.
I wish I could build the ultimate super car.
Granted, but it can't go more than 50 feet before it needs a fillup.
I wish the RIAA would burn in hell for all eternity.
Granted, But movies that scar the minds of your children forever keep getting blooder and messyer..Just like the movie theader floors! Filled with puke and other gross stuff!
I wish my sister could meet Batista from WWE
Granted but they hit it off too well and you soon have to own up for every time you teases you little sister.
i wish that i had more useful vision modes in human form.
Granted, you are now nothing more than an overglorified set of eyeballs with feet.
I wish I could understand the root of all languages.
granted you know how to say "root" in all languages.
i wish for tyra wrexx
Granted, but you get the Tyra Wrexx that comes from a distant planet in a far off galaxy who happens to be a huge mass of acidic blobby material which then proceeds to smother you and digest you.
I wish I had a talent that could earn me millions of dollars.
Granted, but that talent is general crime. The police eventually capture you and you are hauled off to jail. Now four walls are your
TWENTY-FOUR
HOUR-A-DAY
CONSTANT COMPANIONS!
Hey, in Walla, I'll see you in Walla Walla... (Offspring FTW)
I wish I actually had a Flash program.
Granted, you have a program that flashes your body to strangers on the street. You are hauled away for indecent exposure and tossed into my cell to be my new constant companion. By the way, you're the prison b*tch.
I wish I had Spider Man's powers.
Granted... You are now spiderman plus 18 years, you retiered the tights when you lost your leg in a battle with the green goblin, you are now a Crime scene investigator for the NYPD. your daughter May Parker(AKA spidergirl) is wanted for a murder she didn't comit. You discovered your wife was a clone of the real Mary Jane Parker created by Norman Osborne, the clone died tragically and you soon realize your whole marrige was a lie... and that the real Mary Jane is still out there. Your life is a failure, you are an alcholic, and you still can't get the keys to the Fantasticar. But, I have some good news for you, you can save a bunch of money on auto insurance by switching to Geico.
I wish I owned the righs to all anime and Cartoons worldwide.
Granted, Yet alot people stone you to death for such timeslots that dont even work and putting them on random channels you have to buy to see!
I wish,I wish I didnt sit on that fish
Granted, instead you sat on that other fish... you know... the rotten one.
I wish my fingers wouldn't get so cold while I'm typing.
granted now they burn a bit more with every key you press.
i wish i could drop grand pianos on people that bothered me with no ill effects on me.
Granted. And on an unrelated note, someone drops an anvil on your head with no ill effects on them.
I wish I could understand what cats say.
Granted. They say "Look at me, look at me, stroke me now. Feed me." and suchlike.
However, having been handed this critical understanding, you pass out from the sheer tedium of the conversations.
Oh, and eventually, you discover that while you understand them, they can't understand you. And you can't understand people anymore. Have fun locked up in that nice jacket with the really long sleeves...
I wish I wasn't so mindbogglingly irritated by the slightest thing.
Granted, you now have the patience of a brick wall... and also the personality of one.
I wish the creators of stupid commercials would disappear off the face of the earth.
Granted. But Adult Swim and Comedy Central Lose a good deal of ratings due to there being so much less to mock. Apparently, the stupid commercial makers were funding a few of the stupid movie makers.
I wish I had an unbroken, noncursed, cool-looking sword.
Quote from: Black_angel on July 19, 2007, 08:07:55 PM
I wish I had an unbroken, noncursed, cool-looking sword.
Granted. It's made of rubber.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on July 19, 2007, 04:25:28 PM
Granted, you now have the patience of a brick wall... and also the personality of one.
Nothing new there...
I wish I was able to sleep.
Granted. You now have horrible nightmares filled with febreze-weilding abe lincolns, were-ferrets, and dracula.
I wish i had a coke-factory that was protected from explosions, seductive women, and terrorists.
Granted, but it's not protected from the FDA, EPA, DEA, ATF, FBI, NSA, or CIA. They're all waiting in line to shut you down.
I wish the Yankees and Red Sox would fall off the face of the earth.
granted but they then land on your face.
i wish for.......*BAMF* nightcrawler's *BAMF* tele- *BAMF* -portation *BAMF* power.
Granted,Yet no one wants to be near your smelly fart tricks each time you dissapear.
I wish people would stop breaking the law!
granted. but in order to do this everyone put's you in a locked room with my "smelly fart tricks"
i wish for............windsheild washer egg plant!
Granted, you turn into a windshield washer blade made of eggplant, and then get eaten alive by hungry stray dogs.
I wish I could bake the very best cookies in the world.
Granted, but now you're me and have all the personal baggage that entails. Ciao!
I wish Bill O'Reilly would perish in a spectacular on-air accident.
granted except that is is no accident and not only does he survive though his career dies the sores of the miss fortune it's traced back to you.
i wish that my PC hand unlimited storage bandwidth and ram.
Granted, but since your computer just broke the unspoken laws of PC physics, it's immediately taken from you for studying. I bet a week from now, Bill Gates will have copyrighted it.
I wish I could watch George Carlin perform live.
Granted, but the next morning you awake so sick that you can't get out of bed for a week. No, wait. That was me back in '84.
Ah, hell. We'll make you just as sick this time. >:3
I wish I can have enough funds for the full AC weekend next year.
granted but you're forced to fur suit as pink the hermaphrididic cat.
i wish for.................eight lords a leaping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Granted, unfortunately you a slain by five maids a milking.
I wish for the most advanced technology known to man to be shipped to me on a daily basis.
granted the mxr883948 is designed to fit your......*BOOM* omigodsomeonehelpthepoorman!
i wish i hadn't had to do that.
Granted, but now everyone thinks you're a wuss.
I wish I could have a complete understanding of all things electronic.
granted....but only when they're on. good luck trying to fix or set up anything.
i wish.................fish monkey bounce rollercoaster!
Granted, you are now the owner of a bouncing rollercoaster made of fish scales and bones that is powered, run, and maintained by monkeys. That's not necessarily a good thing once the health and safety inspectors, PETA, and animal control come around... and they should be stopping by any minute now. You might have time for one ride though. Just gotta hope those fish bones hold up.
I wish I could create the worlds most entertaining video game.
Granted. Now no-one does anything but play that video game. All those formerly healthy, active kids now just sit around gaming. Eventually, the game is taken away and kept in government storage as a weapon of mass destruction. (Distraction.) This leads to quite a few suicides of the ex-healthy kids, and you are blamed. Good luck in court, pal.
I wish I was more decisive.
Granted. Definitely. Unless it isn't. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Probably. Maybe not. Erm, I think. Kind of. Only it's not...
I wish I had something better to wish for.
granted, unfortunately the wish has made the world a much harsher place to live...plus your life as a malfunctioning darlek constantly shouting "EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!" has annoyed enough of your plunger faced compatriots to jettison you into deep space.
I wish for a silly song.
granted. now it rots your brain in a continual loop for eternity. :kirby
i wish i was the number 1 nation in cybernations.
Granted, but you're North Korea. Anyone else here ever seen War Games?
(Sorry, that could've made more sense. I'd never heard about Cyber Nations till today.)
I wish I could witness anime physics in real life.
granted...rule number 1 if it's going to explode first it bulges... and youre standing next to a man who's stomac is bulging so big his button on his pats is going to fly off.
i wish i had porno from hitler's bunker
Granted. Hitler's secretly a pedo-/necro- and that porno is filled with it. Better hope no one finds out about it.
I wish that knowing some 18-year old American not knowing the meaning of "bigot" and not able to tell who's talking to whom didn't bother me so much. >.>
granted, unfortunately being an American Myself, I too do not know the meaning of the word "bigot" so the meaning of everything you just said has been mistranslated and your wish now reads:
QuoteI wish that some 18-year old American barely understanding the meaning of "bigfoot" and who is incapable of explaining exactly who was talking to whom[in conversation] didn't bother me so much [Gov'ner chip chip tipper gore and whatnot.] >.>
thankfully, I write horrible Spam fiction and was able to extrapolate the true meaning of your wish... as a service fee you have given up your wish and now have a desire to jump off a building.
I wish for sudden inspiration.
......WINGWONG!........ sudden enough for you?
i wish for a mountain of dead rotting things to be left at on the whitehouse porch so bush would know that there is more to war than throwing bodies around
Granted, Now its so bad they find out it was you and now you have to clean up the garbage and the elephant poop at circus forever.
I wish I could draw properly and better than I normaly do
And you can! However, you are distressingly uninspired. Your technique is perfect, but your content is so mediocre that it doesn't even get commented on- way to SUCK.
I wish for some truly excellent (and exquisitely comfortable) socks. :)
granted....me the cursed socks of comfy female repelent! now in order to get laid you have to roll a natural 20 on a 10 sided die.
i wish i could work out why i am so hoplessly addicted to the internet.
granted but this does not cure your addiction it reinforces it.
i wish for vengeance on gates fore stealing the copy rights to my machine (as captain Kirk). Gaaaates!
Granted, but it's spun into a huge lawsuit that's surrounded by a huge media circus. But his lawyers are the ultra ninja lawyers and they eventually get you down to a settlement wherein Gates gives you five bucks and you have to install Windows Vista as your personal OS.
I wish everyone in the world, including my self would get significantly smarter, in both book smarts and common sense.
Granted, but since everyone increases the same amount, comparativly/relativly, the ratio of smarts is the same. Dumb people are still considered dumb, and smart people are still considered smart.
No change whatsoever. >:3
I wish my Space Empires V game would stop crashing so much due to some random error! >:O
Granted. It still crashes, though, due to one unfixable error.
I wish my TV tuner card worked with cable HDTV.
granted now if only you could find whoever stole your HDTV.....
i wish for many kirbys doing the macarena
Granted, but now you can't make them stop. They constantly follow you and dance around you no matter where you go. They dance all night on your bed. They dance around you while you're in the bathroom. They dance on the table while you're eating. They never stop! And it makes things quite awkward when you're trying to go out into the world and live your life. It's really hard to pick up a date while you've got a bunch of Kirby's linedancing the macarena on the bar.
I wish I had a pet black hole.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on July 30, 2007, 09:46:05 AMI wish I had a pet black hole.
Granted. A cute little black hole to call your own and go out into the park and train it to do that cute little wrap-the-leash-around-a-girl thing and... er... it appears that poor woman just got crushed inside a singularity...
So did the park...
There goes the neighborhood...
I wish my Windows Media Player would come unstuck.
Granted,Now its unstuck and now it plays nothing but the house of fhats all day. Over and over with teh buttocks farting in your face along with the twisted Nazi who lives there.
I wish I was cameoed in a flash cartoon (And not die or anything horrid will happen to me in it)
granted. it's a XXX flash starring wildy, mab, and a very bad plotline.....with voices by icarus.
i wish for that flash to be a raveing success
Granted but the RL counter parts of the people in the in the flash track you down believing you to be the origin of it and show you some RL ferret style violence.
i wish that i had a nickle every time some one on this planet did something stupid.
Granted. You're buried in nickels, and can't get out, due to the weight.
I wish I was able to concentrate on useful work, rather than the slightly less useful type.
Granted, but usefulness is a matter of priorities. So, insofar as the granter of said wish is concerned it is more useful for you to clean his room, store his books, etc than accomplish minor goals like, say, you eating or sleeping.
I wish for my hat back. :<
Granted. But it's been transformed into the evil talking hat from the Jack Comic
I wish for more FullMetal Alchemist shows.
Granted, but they've been given a triple 4Kids treatment.
I wish for a 250GB hard drive for my TiVo.
Granted, but it's full of commercials for geriatric hygiene products that can't be deleted.
I wish I completely and totally understood women.
Granted, but now that you know them so well they really don't seem quite so attractive.
I wish for a better today. Hell with a better tomorrow.
granted to day is te frackin riffic. tomarrow however satan will claim your soul and take you to hell and make you his man whore.
i wish for..... blacklight nightgown cereal!
Granted. You are arrested on charges of breaking and entering and theft. The lady who's nightgown was stolen called the police. ;o There are deliberations on whether or not you should be sent for a psycho-analysis, though, so that'll take up some time.\
I wish for math class to be canceled today.
Granted. But you have a three-hour seminar in math tomorrow.
I wish 4Kids would lose its iron grip of suckiness on perfectly good anime. What if it gets D.Gray-Man next?!
Granted, but Focus on the Family takes over, and is like 4Kids on steroids.
I wish the Pirates weren't teh suck.
Granted, I come over and beat the living tar outta you with my crew along side
I wish Zeriara could get a life....She claims she knows lemurs
granted...she gets your life and you get hers.......fair trade hmm?
i wish for for there to actually be ice at the north pole next winter.
granted...you didn't say how much and next year there will only be a single Ice cube at the north pole, now that we're almost as close to the sun as Venus...fortunately, Antarctica is now a hot tourist location and everyone who is anyone has gills.
Gabriel's nonexistent wish is granted. And since he constantly bugs Lucas about that, let me say this: OHMYGOD! PWNED!!!
(I know that last part was uncalled for, but DAMN it felt good. Sorry, Gabe.)
I wish I had fifty really difficult jigsaw puzzles.
Granted. They've all been completed, and glued in place.
I wish I'd been to bed hours ago.
granted unfortunately you went to my old bed which happens to be a glowing burning bed of coal. enjoy you rest and if you can't take the heat don't worry it gets hotter.
i wish that i could bring about Ragnarok.
Granted, except that "bringing about Ragnarok" translates into "starting a Ragnarok Online server" that gets filled with noobs, dupers, and botters.
I wish I could predict every person's next move.
Granted. You're Pride. You get your skull torched.
I wish I could've lived during the 80s.
granted you lived during the 1780's , and you are the Capitan Jack Sparrow.
I wish for control over time and space
granted. you have control over (The space) of your room during (The time) youre there.
i wish for many fancy doodleibopers
Granted, You eat so many till you get diabetic and lots of zits on your face.
I wish I had hammerspace pants that let me pull out anything I need when I want it! With no evil,bad or wrongful side effects!
granted....but you can only pull out hammers. youre now a carpenters best friend next to the tape measure space guy.
i wish for fairy god parents
granted, unfortunately you revealed their existence to the world and have become a bitter school teacher who lives with his mom, has ears on his neck, and are known for crossdressing and giving failing grades.... all because of fairy god parents.
I wish "Avatar: the last air bender" was renamed "Kung fu action Jesus: Tales of the Avatar"
granted. it's pulled from the air for religious reasons. fan girls every where are pissed and your adress leaked out on the avatar message boards.
i wish for macaroni
Granted you now have a feather in a hat. enjoy
i wish i was ready for sub orbital flight
Granted, but then you're busted for all the weed you've been smoking to get THAT high.
I wish that Murphy's Law would never ever go into effect ever again.
Granted. Everything is now fated to failure. EVERYTHING. It makes for interesting work-arounds and abuses though.
I wish math class would be cancelled today.
Granted, but all your other classes today have exams you're unprepared for, and they count for 90% of your final grade.
I wish that Barry Bonds would just go away.
Granted, but Bill kills you for that. And he only does it with a quick and painless bullet through the head.
(I had to 'save' you before Bill came by...he woul have probably done worse, much much worse to you :erk )
I wish that I could get the last medal for this one level on StarWars: Starfighter. It's the only medal in the entire game I'm missing, and I think I'm missing it because of possibly a bug or something. I'm supposed to kill all the AMTs (missile tanks), but when I think I do, I don't get a medal. I activate my scanner, but I can't detect any other AMTs in the entire level. This makes me sad :cry
granted now your system crashes and you cant use it ever again
i wish that i has a split screen moniter
Granted you monitor has met the business Eng of a battle axe and is now in roughly 2 halves. enjoy
i wish that i had more wishes that i could corrupt
Granted, but you do a horrible job on your corruptions and end up feeling very inadequate.
I wish people would stop falling for scams.
Granted, everyone can now spot a scam a mile away, and knowing that it was a scam didn't stop you from investing in that trial package of (enlargement/ diet/ miracle/ tg furry transformation) pills, and you should always read the fine print. now you have to pay he company for pills that restore you to your original apperance, or spend the rest of your life as (insert random transformation of suckitude)
I wish for a perfect memory.
Granted, you have a perfect memory of a blank sheet of paper. You can describe the hue, the size, and even every last wrinkle in that sheet of paper. Shame you can't remember anything else to save your life.
I wish I had a complete set, including several duplicates, of everlasting batteries.
Granted. They need to be recharged every day, and take 23 hours to recharge. And 59 minutes, but who's counting?
I wish I hadn't drunk quite so much wine this evening...
granted. the scary part? you still wake up to that large woman that most people would only pick up if they had beer goggles on.
i wish i were a master earth bender. minoring in water bending. can anyone say mud wrestlein'?
Granted, but you're sued for copyright infringment and lose everything. But look on the bright side, at least you can create mud...
I wish that I had done better in school.
granted. but you were promptly expelled for cheating.
i wish people were easier to understand and deal with.
Granted. Sadly, they are easier to understand and deal with because their collective IQ has dropped about sixty points.
I wish I could find a convention where I could cosplay as House without being considered out of place or a freak. (So what if I'm a girl? It'd be so much fun to be a complete bleep to everyone all day and get away with it!)
granted. youre at a childs convention cosplaying as the big blue house from bear and the big blue house.
i wish for a salami sandwich
Granted. But its former owner, Sonny Chiba, isn't too happy that you stole his sandwich. I heard Mexico's lovely this time of year!
I wish I was a more formidable foe in SSBM.
granted you are now much better in sitting spinning bobing and munching. weird wish though you sure youre ok?
i wish for feralligator!
Granted. It's an alligator sandwich.
Sadly, it's Krystal's, so she can't enjoy it - and neither can you.
I wish I hadn't wanted to do that.
granted now you want to reverse the rolls and let the alligator have the sandwich made of the wisher but that was not allowed and people suspecting what you wished to grant start ostracizing you
i wish that granted wish was less convoluted.
Granted. People ostracise me anyway, so it has very little effect.
I wish I didn't have to deal with idiots at work.
granted, you now responsible for writing "the idiots guide to dealing with people at work" Now you are the idiot... because when you became a writer you accepted a 50% cut in pay, enjoy your new career you get plenty of bubble wrap.
I wish I owned a flashy new car.
Granted.
The police aren't too happy about you driving off in their squad car, though.
I wish I'd managed to catch the first ten minutes of Heroes this week. It's only been on three times...
granted but after that your tv reception breaks down causing you to miss the rest of it.
i wish that i had a place where i could let all of my creations roam free.
Granted, but your bathroom will never be the same.
I wish the seasons would skip summer and winter every year.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on August 13, 2007, 09:20:26 AMI wish the seasons would skip summer and winter every year.
And people - some of them, anyway - get some fun out of a total lack of extremes, for a little while... but it turns out they were actually necessary for something. Ecosystem fall down go boom. Heck, you might've fudged the world's climate enough to make
The Day After Tomorrow an actual possibility... way to go.
I wish I required less sleep.
Quote from: Caswin on August 13, 2007, 11:07:11 AM
I wish I required less sleep.
Granted. That doesn't mean you actually -get- any less, or, indeed, any more. Or even enough. It just means you require less.
Less than what is the rub. You've discovered you require less sleep than your average black bear. Of course, the same can be said of the entire rest of the human race, so it's no real surprise.
I wish I didn't have to clean up after other idiots.
Granted, now you have to clean up after educated people, and boy can they make one heckuva mess.
I wish that someone would start a trend among celebreties where all Hollywood celebreties would physically assault every paparazzi they see with large blunt objects.
granted but all the paperazzi are clogging up emergency rooms. too bad that you were bitten by a snake. now as poison seeps into your veins a paperazzi is pampered and nured to health from a fractured tibia.
i wish that i had the powers of point of view man. were if i see something as tiny i can pick it up or squash it and such.
granted, you now have a wacom pen...you owe me $300 dollars cash for the software,$1,000 for the tablet, and $15,000 dollars for tech fee, and $3 dollars for the two year warranty...thank you for shopping with us on Corrupt a wish forums... for all orders over $500 dollars you earn bonus points, which can be used on rewards like (insert cheap P.O.S) and a magical turd wrapped in a bow.
I wish for a mild winter.
grant you now get to spend a mild winter on the planet Mercury. remember your sun tan lotion. SPF 5000K should suffice if you can breath the air.
i wish that i were out traveling right now
granted you are hitch hikeing and are mistaken for a hobo....a nice guy gives you a ride you fall asleep and wake up in a tub of ice. hope you wernt useing that kidney.....or lung.
i wish for more wishes to corrupt
granted, everyone is now required to ask for thee wishes of Lucas Marcone until they get repetitive and stupid.
I wish I was a better writer.
I wish pokemon was real.
I wish that I knew what it was like to fly.
granted granted and granted......now all the wishes are currupted in a generic way.
i wish for fewer wishes to corrupt
Quote from: lucas marcone on August 14, 2007, 12:59:22 AM
i wish for fewer wishes to corrupt
Granted, but only because nobody likes it when their wish is "corrupted in a generic way". You become highly unpopular in the wishing community, which manifests itself in outright vicious corruptions of your own wishes when you still dare to show your face. Your existence is not a happy one, and all attempts to circumvent it are interpreted as wishes - which are dwindling, as per your own wish, remember - which are, of course, corrupted immediately. Have a nice day.
I wish for the Autobot Matrix of Leadership.
Granted, but since you're not an autobot, you can't use it.
I wish Sprint would finally offer broadband cell phone service in my area.
granted. however it's super expenseive, gives your PC loads of viruses, and they charge you for imagineary services.
i wish for ZOMBIE OUTBREAK APOCALYPSE!
granted...unfortunately you ordered it through the Electronics boutique at the Mall of America from a woman named Barbera...in the heart of Raccoon City. The order finally came in 28 days later, however You can expect some delays on the roadway...something to do with the umbrella corporation. Also you might want to move your ass, as your roommate upstairs was bitten last night by a crazy person...at 'the rave to the grave, also I don't think you have time to take off your pyramid head costume, and you should take his car, a baseball bat, and a box of LP's with you. Oh, and by the way Good luck getting to the store.
I wish for a fantastic car.
granted too bad i comendeered it half a second after you got it so i could haull ass outta there. good luck with my room mate. oh lucky for you i left behind my cricket bat.
lucas' non-existant wish is granted, but since he didn't make a wish, HE GETS NOTHING!
I wish that I could travel to any point in space and time and be able to correct for certain things like the position of other people/objects/landmasses/etc.
granted. but like fry you fall deeply inlove with a woman and do the nasty with her. however that past nastifacation just made you your own great grandfather. the brightside is you are now immune to the delta brain wave and therefore are PERFECT to stop a race of floating brains who want to destroy the universe.
i wish i watched more futureama
Granted, you are able to watch every Futurama episode over and over until you have every single one of them memorized, which leads to you having pointless arguments about them over the internet with other Futurama nerds for the rest of your life.
I wish I could create my own universe.
Granted, one universe. Population: you. Resources: none.
I wish I had a holodeck with the sum total of human creation stored in it's computer.
granted. but like zap branigans holodeck the files containging the images periodicly turn evel and can leave the holodeck to wreak havoc upon the rest of your world....and unfortuneately this happens while you and your lover are in a romantic simulation.
i wish this knowledge of useless tv movie music and comic book facts didn't burden me so.
granted. you start to forget it all but you're drafted to a trivia show the next day and the fate of you home rest on you winning it.
i wish that time travel didn't give me migraines.
granted....but it does however give you "Man parts pains" these pains are your sperm dieing off.
i wish i could take a vacation to ireland....i hear they're so friendly there the'll invite strangers to dinner..and stay the night.
Granted,But you find out you slept with Dr. McDoogins daughter and now he wants to tear living limbs off your body or force you marry her even shes fat as a sow.
I wish could find a better use for this useless camera I bought awhile ago
My brother wanted to corrupt this wish, so here goes.
Granted. Now it's a demon camera that eats your face the minute you click the shutter. But it does take good pictures!
I wish I was reasonably good at drawing my favorite anime characters. And that I obeyed copyright laws so I wouldn't get sued.
granted but you draw them in all the wrong ways. the porn you draw is so taboo and disgusting the goverment orders all of it deleted off the web and you and any of your prints locked in a vault and sealed there for all of time.....but hay at leats you can draw....oh wait you ran out of paper!
i wish mcdoogle's daughter was queen of ireland.
Granted. Her first act upon accepting the throne is to declare all other countries an abomination, and she wages a campaign to destroy all human life outside of Ireland. The casualties mount high before nuclear weapons are called into play, reducing Ireland, and her, to a radioactive dust smear.
I wish I could see that, from a safe distance with no risk.
granted. however im standing beside you. im peeved that you would nuke my queen however there is no risk......yet
i wish for an automatic painful gun to use upon you for nukeing my queen.
Granted, you feel an immense indescribable pain every time you fire the gun. TheGreyRonin is dead, but you've also lost your mind due to the unspeakable torment that the pain gun put on you.
I wish for all of mankind to live in a utopian society and then I rise up with an army of evil creatures to take over.
Granted. You're part of the utopian society, and the evil creatures are having you for lunch.
I wish I didn't have so much work to do.
Granted. You're fired.
I wish all the purple gear I need for a successful Karazan run drops during my next hour of playing WoW.
Granted, but some horde guys aggro'd the giant unkillable boss that tosses out one-hit-kills at anything that moves into the area where you need to be.
I wish I had the time and money to actually play WoW.
Grats,Your broke and homeless due to you wasting your life away and plus people hate you for playing it.
I wish there was something better and more healther than playing MMORPG's all day
Granted, but every time you try to go outside to do those things, you get caught in a raging thunderstorm that lasts until well after sundown.
I wish the rain and heat here would hold off for a day or two so I can get some grilling done.
Granted, but by the time that happens, all your food has gone bad, and by the time you get back from the grocery with fresh food, it starts raining again.
I wish I had a simple, yet effective, and totally not fatal or debilitating method of weight loss.
Granted. You have a pre frontal lobotomy.
I wish I had been able to go to sleep earlier this evening.
Granted, but you still oversleep by two hours in the morning.
I wish USC and Notre Dame both go 0-11 to start their seasons this year.
granted but then more than half the players are arrested for facilitateing a prostatution ring. sush a shame little ricky's hero is nothing more than a whore monger and now it's all your fault.
i wish for SEGA CHANNEL!
Granted. Your cable provider won't carry it, though.
I wish for Good Eats.
Granted. You make a tasty meal.
I wish for another cup of tea.
granted...unfortunately its the fresh sqeezed blood of Tea' the girl from Yugioh.
I wish for the ability to win any argument.
granted your friends now hate you and leave you to wallow in your newfound super ego
i wish for a proper dragon warrior monsters: monster index
Granted, but you can't read it.
I wish I could be the greatest ninja of all time.
Granted, but my friend Rammenstien is so hatefully jealous of you for becoming the greatest ninja ever that he actually goes to his arch-nemisis, the Greatest Pirate of all Time, and hires him to take you out. The two of you engage in a massive climactic battle, and with some sidelines-help from Rammy, the Pirate defeats you. The Pirate, now severely weakened by the battle, dies when the backstabber(literally) Rammy went up and ninja'd him. Rammy, having killed the Greatest Pirate, is nw the Greatest Ninja.
I wish I could come up with ninja corruptions that didn't involve Rammenstien.
granted but the best pirate in the world kills both of you seeing as pirate pwn ninjas
i wish i were the greatest pirate/zombie in the world
Granted, you are a now William Turner... you can only walk on dry land every 10 years for the sole purpose of sex human sex otherwise you have to sleep with a female kraken every three weeks and make squid babies.
I wish for a power over all Felines, Canines, and Rodents.
Granted, but you get killed by a monkey. We're still not sure where he got that power mower, nor how he figured out how to use it...
I wish I could communicate with and understand all living things.
Oh boy my sis wanted to try this out...
Granted,You are able to do so but they wont give you a moment of piece cause you can hear them yap yap about nothing half the time and always want you let them out or so on and not to mention you have full detail why birds poop on stuff.
I wish Disney would get sued for producing the new Turok coming up.
granted. you lose the suit
i wish disney would lose control of gibli studios before thay have a chance to ruin a misaki with a sequil THE HORROR THE NEVER ENDING HORROR! WHEN WILL THEY STOP?!
Granted. They move on to Gonzo. RUN, AFRO SAMURAI!!!
I wish I had a less obsessive nature. It's a little scary, and decidedly unhealthy at times.
Granted, you read my webcomic and feel better about yourself...it takes a few days for the humor to set in, but eventually you only obsess over only me, and my uber sexy hotness... Of course, I'm not interested, and so now you sneak into my home for my underwear and various other thing. living only by what scraps of food I put in the trash.
I wish I wasn't as cruel when granting wishes.
granted. but now you are a girl. you can not do anything guys would like to do if in this position because if you do you will die. instintaniously. now you have to sit through crappy movies, shave areas guys should never shave, go on dates without hopeing it ends in sex,ect,ect
i wish for a tickle fight!
Granted, but you lose and laugh yourself to death.
I wish I had the time and energy to get back into programming.
Granted, you are now Jerry one of the Code Monkeys for Gameivision, enjoy your new co-worker, his name is Dave you'll be working together a very long time ...I feel that is corrupt enough.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cz5unhTODwA
I wish to negate Lucas Marcone's corruption of my wish
Granted, but I corrupt it in exactly the same way.
I wish the "nigras" from the *chans were dropped off in the heart of Crip territory in South Central LA.
granted but they become friends and creat a super gang! not noteven the military can keepem in line!
i wish i had a bean bag chair shaped like a boob.
Granted, but it's not as cool as the one on Codemonkeys is, and you got it used, so it's got a bunch of patches and more than a few "stains of mystery" all over it.
I wish I had a single, easy to use, and unbreakable tool that I could use to fix anything and everything.
Granted. Just open the package. The package that's held shut with bolts only that tool can open. That tool which is the only one of it's kind anywhere in the world.
I wish for free transport and lodging for AC '08.
granted. the hotel manager agrees aslong as he can bind you up at night as he calls you his snooglypoo and you call him big daddy.
i wish i could turn off my malicious nature.
Granted, but your malicious side develops its own level of consciousness and gets smart enough to wonder why it has to be controlled. It breaks out at random times in the middle of the night and causes havoc, leaving you none the wiser until you get arrested.
I wish Hollywood would come up with just one new, exciting, never-before-used idea.
Granted, but by the time it gets out of Development Hell, it's just another insipid piece of manure.
I wish Saturday Morning cartoons would come back, and that they wouldn't suck.
Granted, but it takes years for that to happen, and you die of old age before you get to see them.
I wish I could always and forever be physically fit.
Ok.... *Clears throat*
I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! You like ta-
MOVE IT!
I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! You like ta-
MOVE IT!
I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! You like ta-
MOVE IT!
I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! I like ta move it, move it! You like ta-
MOVE IT!
She's physically fit, physically fit, physicallyphysicallyphysically fit!
She's physically fit, physically fit, physicallyphysicallyphysically fit!
I couldn't resist.
Granted. You dance to that song, and do nothing else, for the rest of you're life. Which is about a week, when you collapse dead from exhaustion, dehydration, and starvation. Have a nice day.
I wish that Sony would go out of business.
why would you wish such a thing? guh just because the ps3 isnt perfect is no reason to bash it. i could do the same to the 360 and wii.
granted but you are blamed and millions of people who enjoy the quality of sony's other products like headphones, tvs, dvd players, ps3, ect all jump you in a dark allyway.
i wish the whole console war would stop and people realize every system has it's stregths.
Quote from: lucas marcone on August 28, 2007, 11:54:24 AMi wish the whole console war would stop and people realize every system has it's stregths.
Granted. Competition becomes a thing of the past. With nothing to work against, the next generation of consoles is actually worse.
I wish I, personally, could find the Master Sword.
Granted, you found it! But you need the three pendants to pull it out of it's resting place... and some elf kid went and hid them.
I wish for the next poster to make my wish for me and then corrupt it.
granted, you wished you were a girl, and so you now you have the body that was given to me when Lucas granted my wish earlier. Fortunately my body is restored, with six pack abs, thanks buddy.
I wish for a lifelike robotic dog.
granted you are now that dog. fetch me my slippers boy.
i wish i could enjoy this more.
Granted. You enjoy this thread so much that it becomes your life. It's a harder addiction to kill than nicotine. When your friends and family try to rip your malnourished, unblinking eyes away from the screen, you bite them. You die alone.
I wish the first Power Rangers had better acting careers. They deserve it.
granted the black ranger went on to star and replace the token black guy from CSI and Allen Resurrection. The Red Ranger and his megazord went on to star as the T-rex in the Jurassic park trillogy. The blue ranger went on to star in hairspray replacing John Travolta's character. The pink ranger got into the cartoon industry and is the voice of Pikachu and Ash Kechum...but only for the movies and original series, the new Ash as Voiced by the yellow ranger is crap. and the green/white/red/black/magenta ranger A.k.a. Doctor Tommy Oliver, went on to star in the role of his lifetime as the security guard in 'Night at the museum'.
I wish for perspective.
Quote from: GabrielsThoughts on August 28, 2007, 04:53:58 PMI wish for perspective.
To your credit, you learn quite a few worthwhile things - and, unable to handle them (yet), become a depressed recluse. Not much of a limb to go out on, really. (Oh, and... I'm sorry, but I've seen the old episodes; the yellow ranger was not a great actress.)
I wish for the old-school episodes of
Dr. Who.
Granted. They're all in an obscure format incompatible with anything used today.
I wish I knew what was so funny about peace, love, and understanding.
(OOC reply to above and below: The PS3 is the least of their worries. The blatant and unrepentant rootkitting of CDs and now games like BioShock make me wish for Sony's demise. When the President of Sony Digital, Thomas Hesse, comes out with a 'Who cares?' attitude about the whole thing, it makes me root for the pirates out there. As long as they make a buck they don't care if it destroys your system. Sony ftl.)
Quote from: lucas marcone on August 28, 2007, 11:54:24 AM
why would you wish such a thing? guh just because the ps3 isnt perfect is no reason to bash it. i could do the same to the 360 and wii.
(The reason: I was short on time and out of ideas. I don't
really wish for Sony to go out of business, they are a good company. While the PS3 is a good piece if hardware(though I'm apparently mistaken on that respect (http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/389274)), it doesn't have any good games out for it, which is why the Wii is beating it. The Wii is actually a really innovative console with some uber-awsome games *coughtwilightprincesscough*
Quote
I wish I knew what was so funny about peace, love, and understanding.
Granted, but you find nothing funny at all about them.
I wish that...hmm...(grrthingkdamnyouthink....).....Ah whatever.
I wish that we used robots for our wars. (Not really, but again, can't think of anything else. I'm just grasping for straws here.)
granted and you think it's all fine and dandy untie you find yourself a refugee in the Wily wars. and get to work. that armor won't shine it's self
i wish for an plasma gun upgrade.
Granted, but it's still in alpha testing stages and... *BOOM* ...oops. I hope you didn't actually need that arm. Don't worry, that's a bug we know about and we're working to address it.
I wish there were more proper uses for this: :ipod
Granted, it's meaning becomes obscured and twisted like the "ok" and "peace out" symbols in europe. If "ok" means A-hole, and peace out means F@suck You, then the symbol used by the little ball must mean "Lulz omgwtf!"
I wish for money
Granted, Yet they lock you up for using toy money..Next time take a closer look on Bens face!
I wish I had iron skin like Colossus and be somewhat muscled and not get hurt or die cause of it.
Granted. The first moment you resume your human form you get run over by a cement truck.
I wish Comcast would be replace by a less evil company.
Granted, they are replaced by Budcat, a strange company located somewhere in Nevada
I wish for spam.
granted. HOW WOULD YOU LIKE A LARGER P3N1Z?!?!?!?!?CLICKZORRZZZZZZZZ! is spammed to your email account over and over for all eturnity untill you buy their product and use it successfuly.
i wish people would see that the game style of the wii has a novelty that wears off quickly like most of the game cubes games.
Granted, but that doesn't stop people from buying them and burying Sony in sales.
I wish only good things would happen to me.
granted you are greeted each morning by a happy beautiful wife you drive to work in a happy cheerful way everyone is always happy you can't place your finger on it. that's ok the brotherhood does a fine job of that for you.
i wish for REBELION!
granted "and low the cry for havoc has going up and war eruption around you. hope you survive to enjoy your wish."
i wish that i could grasp the title mega man for my self from that robot Rock!
granted but now there is nothing mega about you.
i wish america would wise up and use cars that run on ethenol
Granted, but you get run over by one. Sorry.
I wish people were more predictable.
granted you are locked in a room with the androids. they're predicatable enough... just make sure you hide before their "kill all humans" program kicks in
i wish for one fish two fish red fish blue fish!
Granted. Here's some painted goldfish crackers from art class. I saw them on top of the garbag can, but they should be fine.
I wish I could be done with these history papers.
granted but they are don in English and they need to be in Latin. good luck rewriting them
i wish that i had respect of my peers with out me threatening to annihilate them them first
Quote from: lucas marcone on August 30, 2007, 02:33:24 AM
i wish america would wise up and use cars that run on ethenol
It might interest you to know we actually do have vehicles that run on ethanol, in fact most vehicles made within the last 10 years are flex-fuel vehicles. We just don't have access to Ethanol at the pump, and while it is a natural fuel source there is no evidence that it is cleaner burning. Also hybrid vehicles engines (i.e. the Prius and others) tend to clank with the greener burning fuel.The Idea that global pollution is all America's fault is a misnomer, the truth is that China is the big bad, and Corporations with operations overseas are actually responsible. Corporations, don't represent America, they are global, and they are capitalists (Not unlike Micheal Moore ) , and while they used to be part of the United states many of them have relocated to France, Japan, Mexico, China, and India so they would no longer have to pay government(American) taxes. That myth that 1/3 of all the worlds resources go to America is also a myth, but then again no one bothers to check up on anything.
That and ethanol is actually a phoney solution. There are many reasons why, but chief among them is, while it is true that ethanol burns cleaner thsan gasoline, the process to actually make ethanol from processed oil and "corn" pollutes just as much, if not more, than gasoline cars themselves.
Quote from: e_voyager on August 30, 2007, 08:23:51 PM
i wish that i had respect of my peers with out me threatening to annihilate them them first
Granted, but they start threatening you now, forcing you to go forward with your previous threats. It must be lonely being peerless... and a wanted criminal.
I wish I had the perfect firewall.
granted. it's a wall in your house. oops the house burnt down. my bad.
i wish it wasn't so damn hard trying to get back into a regular sleeping schedule.
granted... you never sleep again.
I wish for more Abel's story to update regularly.
EDIT: BRAIN NO WORKIE, I wish that Abel's story would update more regularly.
Your wish is granted but you can't see it
I wish to have 2 black wings on my back =3
granted try moveing with those airplane wings crushing you.
i wish for more people to use some common sense
Granted, but "some" gets defined as "miniscule" so no one can tell the difference anyway.
I wish for the term "Lohan'd" that got coined by one of my local radio stations today (meaning to get really wasted) would catch on worldwide.
granted, Miss Lohan then gets married to you. Lohan'd changes to (INSERT YOUR LAST NAME)'d and your name is spoken among the rednecks, and alcholics for century's
I wish for my own tv series
Granted. It's canceled five minitues into it's first episode and replaced with Sanjaya.
I wish I had a video library of every movie ever produced anywhere in the world.
granted. you are arrested by the FBI for stockpileing child pornography. you have the right to remain silent. ect ect ect
i wish for a butterfly
Granted. Stephanie reassemble?
(And that's gonna go -right- over people's heads...)
I wish I was still on holiday...
@GabrielsThoughts: That would be awesome!
Granted, but when you get back this time you find that DM has really screwed this whole thing up and it's up to you to figure out what he did and how to fix it.
I wish I could have a nice long paid stress-free holiday.
granted you are now a panellist on a star trek convention the panels is on one step beyond technology. but it's all expense paid so enjoy.
i wish that i could go to certain people one and like them to the creation of entire worlds over which the have much power but also much responsibility.
Granted, but remember the old axiom... power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Those certain people become the perfect examples of that.
I wish I could truly understand how the human brain works.
granted. "how's ryudo's brain's disection comeing? good good and you ghost of ryudo how are you doing?
i wish my city of heros account was payed off.
granted but the server crashed and lost all of your hero data. ah well you can tray again if you wish after all you account is paid up now.
i wish i had more time for games
granted, you are now underemployed.
I wish to see the supernova of a star.
Granted. You go blind.
I wish my desk wasn't so cluttered.
Granted. Someone just went past, put a bin at one end, and lifted the other. Your desk is now clean. Completely clear, even...
I wish I had more focus.
(actually i'm currently spending my time looking for work that's why i have no time for games)
granted but it is only occurs in ten second burst. enjoy
i wish i had my own quantum computer with atomic pile power source for returning to the past.
Granted, but now you can't get back... incidentally, look out for that giant dinosaur... ooo that had to hurt.
I wish I could speed read.
G r a n t e d . Y o u m a y n o t i c e s o m e s i d e e f f e c t s , b u t t h e y s h o u l d w e a r o f f b y m o r n i n g .
I wish I'd been a bit more creative with that one.
granted, but then you are blocked from all future wish granting.
I wish i was the best guitar player ever.
Granted, but every time you try to play a note the RIAA sues you for copyright infringement at $10,000 a pop.
I wish I had a replicator like on Star Trek programmed with all the recipes that ever appeared on Food Network.
granted. you don't realize however most klingon food is poisonous to humans. too bad huh?
i wish i could fix my mp3 player each time the soddering joint comes loose.
granted now you can and it becomes a daily task. enjoy the drudgery
i wish that misty the mouse was back to updatiing. i never did get to see how that last story arc ended.
granted. 404 file not found
i wish myspace has a filter that filtered out all the people with "nude modeling photos" AWAY from my profile
Granted, now you get all the people with "gratuitous ugly fat hairy guys pr0n".
I wish I didn't have to deal with stupid people.
granted. you don't exist. take it how you want it.
i wish i had an army of squrrils
Granted. They think you're a bad nut and toss you down the garbage chute.
I wish my DirecTV DVR could be installed today instead of Saturday.
granted, throught the magic of timetravel your wish is granted...unfortunately the one who installed your Direct TV DVR is a pervert and traveled back in time to make sure you were an big breasted woman with loose morals... have fun.
I wish for a pineapple, and no faces this time.
ok this one has a butt
i wish for humanity to wisen up
Granted, Now we have many ways to piss people off more with our sarcasim and many witty things among the list.
I wish all fruits had butts
Granted, but now old people won't touch them, and children won't stop giggling at them, and... well... you don't wanna know what those guys in the trenchcoats are planning.
I wish writing on paper didn't make my hand hurt so much.
Granted. Someone wanders past and suggests you use a pencil or a pen, rather than your hand, to write with.
Of course, being who you are, you won't stop, but you can't say we didn't try to help...
I wish people were more attentive to minor details sometimes.
Granted. Now every little task takes four hours longer than normal.
I wish my elbow didn't hurt so much.
Granted,Its broken in two places and now your in worse pain.
I wish for pyrmid of fresh hot and not explodsive or deadly hamburgers
Granted, they're completely raw, but it's fresh meat. and totally drowned in habanero sauce making them nice and hot. But that's the way you like 'em, right?
I wish everything could be accomplished with the push of a single button.
Granted.
Figuring out -which- button, or who needs to push it, or how to push it, is all left as an exercise for the reader.
In heiroglyphics.
In code.
And run through PGP for good luck.
I wish I had more motivation to work.
Granted, you're pretty well motivated now... but you're still not getting enough sleep at night, so you ain't got the drive.
I wish I could be more creative.
Granted, you are creative at finding ways of accomplishing nothing, now go out there and put those skills to good use.
I wish for an apple pie
Granted but Bill used his winkie on it to re-enact American Pie with the group
I wish to meet the famous Doctor Who actor Tom Baker
Granted. He comes out of his house to greet you after you are caught stalking him. You carry on a nice two-minute chat about his work as the Fourth Doctor before you are thrown in prison for a few comfy nights.
I wish I could do my homework faster.
Granted, but you forget to turn it in :B
I wish that I had known Benjamin Franklin without the use of time travel.
granted, the average lifespan of a human is now 25,000 years and while humans reach physical maturity 50 years of age, and are able to reproduce like bunny rabbits, the world population has now reached 106 billion people. this caused a massive famine resulting in fewer humans being born... including Elvis, and the inventors of the telephone, elevator, and ironically Dick Cheney. Oddly enough the Africans of Samolia are now the fattest people in the world...and Jonathan Swift's "modest proposal " is taken literally.
I wish that America had colonies on the moon, mars, phobos, and demos.
Granted... but the events depicted in the Doom series actually happen because of that.
I wish I could remember everything I ever read and heard with perfect clarity for the rest of my life.
Granted. You just can't remember anything you've seen on tv, or said, or anything else, -unless- you've read it. You can't even remember how to talk... Or use any of that information you -do- have.
I wish I had more time to spend with my wife.
Granted. You're fired. But hey, on the plus side, you can spend more time with your wife.
I wish I was in better physical shape.
Granted. You're now a perfect triangle.
I wish I had a better corruption for that.
Granted, but now you can't use it because it's not your turn anymore.
I wish I could be quicker with my witty responses and faster with my physical reflexes.
Granted. You're just slower at thinking.
Much slower.
So slow, in fact, that you keep getting into trouble because you don't understand your witty responses, often for hours at a time...
I wish I hadn't wandered down here to catch up on the posts.
Quote from: llearch n'n'daCorna on September 18, 2007, 05:15:37 PMI wish I hadn't wandered down here to catch up on the posts.
Granted. I'll resist the temptation to play the "you didn't come here > no post > time paradox" card... but for want of information to base it on, your post is totally irrelevant, as this topic has become devoted solely to the praise of tasteful emoting, and you had no idea.
I wish I could edit my story in spite of the fact that it's more than a month old. (I JUST noticed that scene with Boko sounds like a "they wake up together" scenario. O_o)
Granted, but BillBuckner locks it again, because he's just that helpful.
I wish I didn't have to eat.
Granted, Now your Anorexicphiliac
I wish I could find that jelly baby factory here in the states without traveling so far where i live
Granted, Google Maps is your friend, but that's as close as you'll ever get.
I wish all immigrants to the US would make a real and honest effort to learn the english language.
Granted.
Sadly all the locals don't. As can be figured out from any random view of any AOL chatroom.
I wish I could play the guitar like John Butler.
granted, unfortunately the twelve year old John butler from South America has no desire to pick up the guitar any time soon
I wish for computer mediated, interpersonal, and intrapersonal communication skills with perfect memory and retention for everything I see and hear, and that my ability to live, see, communicate, and hear can never be taken away, and my body remains free from harm or injury for the rest of my life.
Granted. But you've just been "volunteered" for a trip to the edge of the universe. One-way. Via the least-populated route. In the slowest craft they have. With no suspended animation equipment. Or communication equipment.
I wish for a cookie.
Granted. It's a browser cookie, and it's tracing what you do on the Internet.
And you should be ashamed of yourself for visiting -those- sites, you really should.
I wish I got to bed earlier.
Granted, but while you were sleeping, DA was visiting -those- sites on your computer.
I wish I could fall asleep and wake up at will.
Granted... but you lose control of your bowels.
Je souhaite que je sache comment à commencer mon essai français.
(I wish I knew how to start my French essay.)
granted. but you forget all french except how to say "eat shit and die"
i wish i knew how to say "eat shit and die" in every language in the universe.
Granted, but that is the only thing you can say in any language.
I wish I didn't have classes that started so early.
hay no piggybacks!
granted but you still sleep through them enjoi your F
i wish for a giant robot......cause chicks dig giant robots
Granted. But it's Megatron.
I wish I could find a few more SNES games.
Granted, but they're all really badly made Bible themed games.
I wish for the next poster to corrupt my wish without using the word "the".
Granted. However, there is no way that you'll ever understand it.
I wish I had more patience.
Granted, but in another language "patience" ends up being the name of a smally fuzzy animal with a nasty disposition... and you have a lot of them... and they're hungry.
I wish I had gotten more sleep last night.
granted now you're in a coma. and the hospital staff nick named you wife TCW or tasty coma wife. (watch scrubs for reference)
i wish for more love everywhere.
Granted, but spreading your love around gets you serving 10-20. You really should learn to keep your trenchcoat closed.
I wish I could produce the greatest movie evar.
granted however it's porn so now everyone views you as moraless scum while at the same time praiseing you for them being able to get their rocks off.
i wish i was the star in the movie...and that it's straight porn, with attractive women.
Granted. You're female, and are the token non-attractive one, to boot. Good luck with the bukkake scene. (Incidentally, bukkake isn't in the FireFox dictionary - I have no idea why...)
I wish I had more time to talk...
Granted... but now the only people left to talk to are n00bs who can't spell.
I wish I knew whether I killed that squirrel on the road or not. I hate feeling so guilty.
Granted. Instead, you trade places with me and feel guilty for running over a cute little wild brown bunny that ran right in front of you. There was a rumble/thumping sound, clearly from the floor of the car. You never got a chance to look back.
I wish I didn't just do that to poor Black_Angel. I feel bad for that now :<
granted.but she did it to you.
i wish for a perfect government.
Granted, but it only happens after the Apocalypse, after millions of people have died.
I wish that local networks would return to running children's shows in the afternoon.
granted. they're hitlar youth childrens shows
i wish hitler was killed during his trench running years in WWI
Granted, but someone far worse comes into power before WW2 that makes Hitler and the Nazi's look like pansies. Thanks a lot.
I wish I could mass produce the world's most delicious cookies.
Granted. The ingredients are all banned by the FDA and all other countries ten minutes after they go on store shelves.
I wish Ahmedinejad would declare himself insane and unfit to hold power then check into a mental institution for the rest of his days.
i can not corrupt shuch a noble wish.
i wish iran iraq and all the other middle easern countries went thorough the hippie period right about now.
Granted, but with ideals such as "free love" being passed around, Fox News becomes little more than an "all middle-eastern porn all the time" channel, because even though they're professing peace and protesting the war, our soldiers are still gonna be out there.
Granted. You get nothing.
Not an electronic sausage. And you with this terrible pain in all the diodes down your left side...
I wish I wasn't quite so verbose, sometimes.
Granted, now you're a mute.
I wish I hadn't forgotten to make a wish on my last post.
granted. and for disrupting my being able to make a witty come back.....DEATH BY SNU SNU!
i wish i would land on the planet of the hot smart and totaly into me space amazons
Granted, Now your fested apon the totaly hot amazons and now you fester inside their bowels and soon end up #2 or #1..Be glad they where totaly into you..Well your taste and boiled flavors anyhow. Enjoy being a new skull apon the high mothers fireplace!
I wish I had a bowl reeses pieces candy cereal right now and thats not spoiled or rotten incudling the milk and cereal itself with a real clean spoon!
granted but seeing as there still the candy and not the puffs it tastes rather unpleasnt.
i wish i wernt just another lonely broken hero picking up the pieces of my mind
Granted. Now you have no CLUE where the pieces of your mind have got off to.
I wish for an essay about one of my significant childhood experiences. It has to be typed, double spaced, size twelve font and ready to be handed in by tomorrow. Also, it has to have had four days of work put into it :<
Granted, but before you get to turn it something happens to the essay that makes it unable to read.
I wish I could go into my computer and travel throughout the internet.
4chan
I wish Insecticomics updated twice daily.
granted but the stories get weird and dramatic and when susan ends up with ricky it's just too much! larry had her fair and square! and you're so sad you die. the end
i wish i wern't so invincible in "defend the house: part duex"
Granted. You died. Bad luck there.
I wish there were an easier and more effective way to study for my upcoming exam.
Granted, but this method involves a jack that plugs into your head, and the information overload drives you to madness.
I wish for sparklies.
Granted, though you're probably going to want to throw that lit stick of TNT away from you and run in the other direction...
:explosion
Whoops. Too late.
I wish to win the lottery... twice.
Granted. The winnings from one are all taken to pay taxes on the other and vice versa.
I wish for buckwheat pancakes.
granted you are now a buckwheat pancake.
i wish for a flock of birds to eat that buckwheat pancake
granted they are pigeons and now... OH NOES :U they are flying over you and splat! You have white all over you.
I wish I had psychokinesis
Granted, however the only thing you can move is buildings. And then only by millimetres.
I wish I had a better corruption for that.
Granted now you are good at corruptions, but mostly coming up with responses and you are called, e-mailed and mailed every day by people wanting advice on those things
I wish I was an ageless supreme overlord and master of the universe who because of my power would not be disturbed when I wanted to be alone
Granted. You forget to read the Evil Overlord list, and manage to implement every single one of the items on it. Wrongly.
I wish I could afford a bigger house.
granted, unfortunately it's filled with furry porn, and the 25 genetically engineered furries you keep in the basement for that purpose are plotting to kill you...and turn your children into furries of lower intelligence.
I wish for more Klingon VS Furry events to occur worldwide.
Granted, but brawls start occurring between the Trekkies and the furries. Pretty soon, this leads to gang violence. And of course, amid all this are the jerks who keep TPing the arenas.
I wish House yaoi fanfiction would cease to exist.
Granted, but now Black_angel yuri has sprung up to replace it.
I wish I had a typewriter.
Granted, but all the keys jam the first time you try to use it.
I wish that there were faster PowerPC Macs out there that were reasonably priced.
Granted. OS X (or 9 or 8 or 7 for that matter) won't run on them.
I wish I had warmer fingers.
Granted. They're on fire.
I wish for supercalifragilisticespialidocious.
Granted. There's a broken record in your room now, playing that song over and over, on full blast. The power button's broken, and someone Gorilla Glued the plug to the socket.
I wish I knew the one true religion in the world.
Granted, but you know too much and God has to take you up because you'll blab to the whole world truths that it isn't ready for >:3
I wish that there was peace on earth, good will towards men during the whole year and not just during Christmas.
Granted. Women are excluded, and there is a mass uprising of the women, who take over the world and force you to specific masculine duties. These duties are rigorous and exhausting, and you don't live long.[1]
I wish I had the authoritorial gift to make better corruptions for these wishes.
[1] This is because wiring plugs, putting up shelves, sorting out the funny noise in attics and mowing lawns can eventually reduce even the strongest constitution.
Granted, but your authority is soon revoked after that incident involving 10lbs of potato salad, some chopsticks, and that guy from FedEx.
I wish for a hug from a nice person.
Grandted, You get huged by a completey "nice" stranger who practicly wears nothing but a trenchcoat and is naked.
I wish for a giant fresh cooked chocolate chip cookie that wont kill me or make me sick
Granted, it makes you mentally unstable, blind, deaf, and dumb... but other than that, you're perfectly healthy.
I wish I had x-ray vision that would not hurt myself or others in any way.
granted, its your only vision and you see things you wish youve never seen
I wish for my own minions
Granted. But they unionize and demand more payment or they'll go on strike.
I wish I was more motivated to start my homework.
Granted. You didn't have any today, since your teacher forgot to give it to you.
Tomorrow, when you will have two days worth, you won't have any motivation.
I wish I had a few more ideas.
Granted, but they're really bad ideas that you really shouldn't act on.
I wish to never get any more aches and pains.
Granted. You have CIPA. No more aches and pains, all right...
I wish I could stop talking to myself.
granted, you now start talking to plushies...and guess what! they talk back.
I wish for a rainstorm.
Granted. However, the storm is so intense that the entire area floods, submerging your home, inflicting massive property damage, and your insurance expired last night.
I wish the news subjects here on the forums would change more often.
Granted. Now it's all of the Potter fanfic all the time.
I wish for Tom Batuik to get even more of the same cancer he gave Lisa. (http://joshreads.com/)
Granted. He dies, to the heightened grief of fans of the strip. You monster.
I wish I was tougher.
Granted, you are now a baby sting ray...anything that can take down Steve Erwin is the toughest creature alive.
I wish I could host Saturday Night Live.
Granted. The show is canceled for good thirty seconds into your opening monologue.
I wish Fernando Alonso would STFU.
(Teed that one up for ya, Bill. Have at it.)
Granted.
but you have to too.
and actually wear a tutu.
I wish that I had the most awesome script in the world to use in my Film and Video class.
Granted. The last word in every sentence is missing from your copy.
I wish I had more patience
Granted, but when they discover you're not a doctor they take away your priveleges.
I wish for time.
Granted, you have *mfrmble* months to live.
I wish I wasn't broke all the time.
Granted. You've been "fixed".
I wish I could go home. Ooo, look at the time...
Granted, but halfway there you're called back to repair a major problem and you're the only one who can be contacted. But don't worry, it shouldn't take too long... maybe the whole weekend. Hope you've got a sleeping bag in your trunk.
I wish I were a highly charismatic person.
Granted. You are George W. Bush, who, in the very near future, will be assasinated for being a total dumbass :P :giggle
I wish I mad more Lucky Charms.
Granted. You are now a slave to the Lucky Charm factory.
(mmmm typoes!)
I wish that Kirby would stop spinning around like that... :mowdizzy
Granted. He stops spinning, looks at you, then opens his mouth wide, sucking you bodily into his interior in a massive suction whirlwind, then powers up to become... Sienna Kirby! :kirby
I wish I couldv'e resisted doing that :B
Sienna Kirby? There's a difference?
Granted, but the only way you could do so was by locking yourself in a closet, where you grow old and die.
I wish I could stop 'torturing' techmaster-glitch so much.
Granted, now it's llearch's job.
I wish I had the power of directed pyrokinesis.
Granted, but sadly you use it one day while a mirror happens to be nearby.
I wish that the noodles I'm eating weren't cold.
Granted, my directed pyrokinesis (after being ricocheted off of a handy mirror) heats up your soup... to lip and tongue burning proportions, to the third degree. Sorry.
I wish to have the answer to each and every single question ever asked and ever to be asked.
Granted. They're in random order, and you can't choose which one you remember in which sequence.
I wish I... no, I'm already torturing tech. Uh... I wish... no, that one's come true as well. Uh....
Hmm. I wish all the comics I am reading came to a definite and final end, -after- the story was complete, and before the artist dies.
granted, Unfortunately each issue is now the begining of the series... a pioneering idea started by Gabrielsthoughts whereby each issue is the first issue with a self sustaining storyline, and is linked to the others by a common idea or character with no real goal in mind other than random fun, while poking fun at every comic book stereotype... Kinda like the idea behind deadpool, but without the constant threat of death.
I wish my comic had more readers.
Granted, however your readers go to the forum and nitpick everything and tear it apart, completely ignoring any attempts at humor or satire, and get offended at the slightest thing.
I wish that I could have a computer that can run Mac OS 10.5 smoothly.
Granted. The computer won't run any applications, but it runs the OS just fine.
I wish I had something original to wish for.
Granted. I have an original corruption for it...
What? :3
I wish I had a Warp-Aci.
(And, dammit llearch, now I want to know what it was you were going to 'torture' me with, you sneaky devil you...)
granted but your warp arc Cero is busy plotting your downfall as we speak
i wish that i had more control over time so that i wouldn't need to plot to travel through it
Granted, but you can only travel through a few seconds at a time.
I wish my salary was a lot higher.
Granted, but you literally had to give up your arm and leg to get it.
I wish I had a wild imagination.
Granted. You find yourself unable to tame it, and are stuck imagining all sorts of unpleasant things at the worst times possible.
Particularly when you're trying to eat.
I wish I... no, I've got that. Hmmm.
Oh, yes, I've done this one before, haven't I? I wish I had something to wish for.
Granted.
You now have nothing.
(Silly llearch, that's already what happens :) )
I wish for... a dance party.
Granted, but the only people who attend are awkward balding overweight white guys who only know how to do the Macarena.
I wish I could memorize everything I read.
Granted, unfortunately because of a tragic car accident you are incapable of forming new memories. that's not entirely true you still have those memories of the cat in the hat movie, the wikerman, silent hill, and resident Evil Apocalypse to enjoy.
I wish for speed ad agility unlike anything anyone has seen before
Granted. You're now in an alternate world with no other people around. By definition, you've got speed and agility unlike anything seen before over there.
I wish I didn't feel so tense right now. Or that I could focus on my accounting homework.
Granted.
You fall into a volcanoe. By definition, you can just
feel those tense muscles melting away.
>:3
I wish that... there was more zoom in my kaboom.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on October 15, 2007, 12:43:36 PM
Granted, but the only people who attend are awkward balding overweight white guys who only know how to do the Macarena.
and you make that sound like a bad thing. :B?
Granted, but that's slang for... oh my... look, you might want to avoid mirrors and other reflective surfaces... for the rest of your life. Why? ... Best you don't know.
I wish I could repair anything and everything.
Granted, but each repair only lasts for a few hours before it breaks again, requiring longer and more expensive repairs each time, until it's not worth the expense , so no one calls you anymore and your business dries up.
I wish Texans wouldn't deep-fry everything.
Granted. Texans will burn everything.
I wish to have a localized copy of Mana-Khemia.
Granted.
Now they only deep-fry you.
>:3
I wish I had not wasted my last wish.
Quote from: Roureem Egas on October 16, 2007, 01:41:22 PM
I wish to have a localized copy of Mana-Khemia.
Granted. It's being used to play Risk. Via post. Don't expect it back in less than ten years.
Quote from: Sienna Maiu - M T on October 16, 2007, 01:44:41 PM
I wish I had not wasted my last wish.
Granted. Now your last wish wasted you.
I wish people would pay more attention. ;-]
Granted. Now they pay constant attention to you, eventually driving you insane because they're always watching. Always waiting. Eyes following you everywhere. Can't sleep or they'll get you. >:3
I wish more people used common sense. I mean, for what they call "common sense", it's not all that common now, is it?
Oh, so true...granted. Now everyone as common sense, but no real smarts to speak of. Thanks a lot.
I wish...hmm...oh what the heck. I wish I was a smiley! :D
Granted, but you end up being that one smiley that no one ever uses. Ever.
I wish I'd stayed in bed today.
Granted, Princess Clara breaks your legs with a sledgehammer horridly crippling you for life and leaves you not to worry getting out of bed forever
I wish I didnt break that teachers camera in ISS (In School Study)
Granted, but then the camera is used to take lewd photos of you doing something nasty to a twinky to be used as blackmail at a future date.
I wish I could hear the thoughts of women.
This place has all the popular postw**ring threads, doesn't it?
*ahem*
Your wish has been granted, Mr Lee, but you can kiss your self-confidence goodbye now that you don't have to guess what the girls think about that haircut of yours.
I wish for free meal and I mean compleatly free. No charging of any kind.
Granted. Your meal consists of old rubber tires and rusty caltrops, sautéed in a light sauce of muddy water from the river Nile flavoured with raw sewage. Do try not to throw up, and enjoy it.
Incidentally, all these threads on this board do not count towards your post count. So you can whore all you like, but it won't actually show up.
I wish I had more time.
granted, time for you slows down, unfortunately the rest of the world appears to be traveling at the speed of light. Fortunately you are a former male model and are used as a maniquin at Macy's.
I wish for a super cool action figure with bealching powers.
Granted. It was made in china, with all that is implied by that statement.
I wish my wish created a paradox
Granted, but the paradox causes the world to implode which leaves a tear in the space/time continuum which creates a mega super massive black hole which sucks up the entire universe into a singularity, never to be released again. Thanks a lot.
I wish I had stayed in bed today.
*granted* Do you feel any better now?
I wish for a random .gif
Granted. You get goatse.gif. I hope that makes you feel better, too.
I wish I didn't have as many worries.
Granted, your new worry-free lifestyle eventually leads to you sitting in a plane that's currently nosediving towards the Grand Canyon. But hey, there's nothing to worry about right? You'll probably be identified by your dental records.
I wish people wouldn't demand impossible things from me.
Quote from: Omega on October 25, 2007, 11:02:59 AM
*granted* Do you feel any better now?
Yes, yes I do.
Granted. They now just want infinitely improbable things
I wish I were perfect at everything.
granted, you are a perfect ass and you are perfect at every thing you do...but as a donkey your life will be full of hardships.
I wish for telekinetic abilities that extend to everything within weapons range.
Granted. The weapon you have chosen is a scalpel.
I wish I knew where my wife was.
Granted. She's at Harrod's. With all your credit cards. And cash. And a wicked grin on her face.
I wish llarch hadn't corrupted Gabriel's wish before I did.
Granted, but instead of llearch corrupting it before you did, I corrupted it before you did.
I wish to win the lottery once per year after it's gone over 100 million dollars.
This WILL happen after the markets go down and we all end up buying by tradeing goods for goods.
I wish for that you will not grant me my wish. (yes, I have played this game before)
Granted. You don't get your wish.
I wish people weren't quite so easily amused.
Well, I', not too amused how you just not granted me my wish by not letting me wish for it.
I wish for never ending pile of fire wood.
Granted. It's on fire, and you can't put it out. Heck, you can't even get within 500 metres of it.
I wish I had something else to do this morning.
Granted, but since you're playing around on this forum, it doesn't get done. You're fired.
I wish I had an easier and better paying job.
Granted. You can have mine.
You just got fired, though.
I wish I had a better corruption for that.
Granted, He now resides into a old wooden crate for a home and works with and for hobos now.
I wish the world never seen,heard or created a freak of a cartoon. Walter Melon: Stunt double for Hire
Granted, instead it's replaced with a reality show: "Zedd - Crash Test Dummy For Hire"
I wish I had a companion cube that I didn't have to incinerate.
Granted. You are incinerated in place of the cube.
I wish I was more organized.
granted, your home and everything in it is organized chaos...which is arguably worse than no organization at all.
Granted. You get nothing, but you get it in a stylish box.
... the packaging takes up your entire house.
I wish I had something to wish for.
granted, unfortunatley I've forgotten you wish :mowdizzy
I wish for a giant robot car with a interdimensional space drive, universal translator and several loyal gearheaded friends to help keep the robot from breaking down.
Granted. On your first trip you fly straight into a black hole.
I wish all my PC hardware worked with Linux without spending countless sleepless nights to make it so.
Granted. However, you have to use Slackware.
I wish I'd gone to bed some hours ago.
granted, but a pardox is created and me and my giant robot crush you when w exit the spacial rift that was created.
I wish I was a billionaire with no debt, no life altering injuries, loyal accountants and no problems with the government.
Granted. You're being hunted by your business associates, with assassins.
I wish I'd been more organised this morning.
Granted, but it's a day later now so it really doesn't matter anymore.
I wish I could bring about the zombie apocalypse without personally having to suffer in any way shape or form.
Granted. You're the first zombie.
I wish my son wasn't sick. :-(
Granted. But you are. And now that your son's healthy, he won't leave you alone.
I wish my friend would quit smoking.
Granted, but now you've taken up smoking and your friend wishes that you would quit smoking but you won't listen.
I wish I could easily confuse people.
Granted. I mean, Not Granted. Uh... Granted. Er....
Oh, gosh, I'm so confused. Do you want me to make you confusing, or not?
(On the down side, you can never get anything that you order correct - not even fast food)
I wish I had a better corruption for that one.
Granted, but now you can't use it because you're too confused.
I wish I could unlease a bunny horde on the unsuspecting populace, without any ill side effects on myself.
Granted... ever read Pet Shop of Horrors...?
I wish I wasn't allergic to carrots anymore. (I freaking LOVE them, but if I eat them I get hives. It SUCKS.)
Granted, But now it gives you a killer bowel movment with a chance of painful gas
I wish for a for a pony that will be always at my side that wont rape me in my sleep or kill me
Granted. It's a rocking horse. That's too small.
I wish all the stupid people would finally change their ways.
granted unfortunately everyone is stupid to someone.
i wish that people understand my wishes better sot that i would not winch at the misunderstood corruptions.
Granted. Your winch is now broken.
I wish I wasn't so cold.
( and i could have sworn the typo sot would have gotten the attention.)
granted old ma wily has captured you and put you to work n the furnace room carting loads of coal the the blast furnace. ( remember that is the guy that tends to have lava running freely in his fortes as well people)
i with that i misspelled this less.
Granted, but by the time you've spellchecked and proofread... it's now next tuesday and your corruption and wish no longer apply.
I wish I was more motivated to get things done.
Granted, but now no-one is motivated enough to appreciate it.
I wish I didn't have such freaky nightmares.
Granted, now you no-longer sleep. Oh hey, they've also invaded your living day time.
I wish I weren't so tired right now, and could actually focus on the task at hand.
Granted, but you are too hungry to work instead.
I wish I weren't two hours from home.
Granted.
But the only reason you get to stay at home is because you flunked out of everything, and now have to live in your parent's basement. :B
I wish I could stop using the ':B' so much
Granted, now you keep using this one -
:mooncat
- until it's no longer funny.
I wish I could go back in time and stop the origins of reality tv.
granted but your attempts to stop reality TV actually star it.
i wish that time travel wishes were harder to corrupt.
Granted, but now no one can go forwards in time. its a BACKWARDS UNIVERSE! STREHTORB!
i wish Specsavers wasn't so boring. (im doing a Work Experience week there)
Granted, now it's the most exciting experience of your life and nothing will ever be able to top it, ever. Everything else that you experience for the rest of your life will pale in comparison to... whatever it is that you're doing at Specsavers.
I wish I had an absolutely perfect way to figure out who's telling the truth or who's telling lies.
granted, but now everyone just doesn't say anything.
I wish i could beat Carry Me Home on Guitar Hero 2 on hard!
Granted. It takes you so long to master that you lose all your friends. And get wicked blisters.
I wish smoking had never started.
Granted, but now chewing tobacco is all the rage. Designer spit bottles adorn celebrities. Spittoons are now as common as ashtrays. And you're a professional bottle/spittoon cleaner.
I wish I had a PFY around here to do my more boring duties.
It is done. You get to do the hazardous ones.
I wish for more emoticons
Granted. They're added under a special mode which means you can't use them, and they get auto-filtered out when you're browsing, so you can't see them either.
And it's clever, so it tracks -you-, and not your machine. So if you log out, you still can't see them, and if you go to someone else's machine, and log in as them, you still can't see them.
Anyone would think someone had a grudge against you. ;-]
I wish I could code that well.
Granted, you have leet coding skills. But you are employed only to make Swedish Word Processors for Mac.
I wish my GH3 controller wasn't so crap.
Granted, now it's so awesome... it gets stolen. Repeatedly. Eventually you steal it back from your thief's thief's thief's thief's thief's thief's thief's thief's thief, but then it is soon stolen from you again. Repeat ad nausium.
I wish I wasn't sick.
Granted, but now you are dead.
I wish i had toast.
Granted, but when it gets stuck in the toaster, you try to fish it out with a fork.
I wish that these clemintines were more awesome and less filled of bitter fail.
Granted, but you overdose on awesome and die playing a madd riff on guitar that makes you face bleed.
I wish my back stopped hurting.
You're paralysed now, sorry. :<
I wish that I could make my toe- and fingernails fall off at will.
Granted, but they take ages to grow back and you can never open anything again in your life.
I wish i could paint my red door black [/rolling stones]
Granted. But no-one gets the reference. They all just think you're a lame Goth.
I wish I was more prepared for college.
Granted. You discover you've prepared for the wrong course, and you're enrolled in "Creative Leaf-rolling", "Skunk Smoking", "Appreciating The Doors", and "Far Out, Man" - amongst others.
I wish I had a better corruption for that.
Granted, but you never use it.
I wish my mouse's batteries would recharge.
Granted, but they hold so little a charge that you can't use your mouse for more than a few seconds between recharges.
I wish I had more marketable skills.
Granted, but all everyone wants is a toilet cleaner.
I wish i didn't have to go downstairs for more sweetmeal digestives.
Granted.
They come up to you.
And eat you.
I wish I had better time-management.
granted, your time management is flawless, you no longer have time for anything fun, entertaining, or generally anything that you would have liked to do but you can never find the time...oh and Sweeny Todd has offered to give you a free haircut, you better hurry up or you'll be late...Don't loose your head over it , your not that late.
I wish for pomegranates, I don't know what I'm going to do with them, but I want them.
Granted, but they're rotton. Too bad :\
You might have even tried to vandalize with them, but they don't even stay intact when picked up, and leave a horrible smell on you, which would instantly make hiding impossible.
(I don't get my hair cut :/ Sorry mah main-man. I wouldn't mind some pie though :T)
I wish that I could figure out this back pain of mine.
Granted, but there's nothing you can do about it and the pain will last forever.
I wish I could better manage my sleep schedule.
Granted, you are permanently comatose.
I wish i had a good enough soul-gem to enchant my Glass Dagger.
Granted, but you enchant it with Fire damage 500pts On Self On Strike. But look at it this way, if you can kill someone in one hit, then at least you're taking them with you.
I wish all people in the world only spoke the truth.
granted but now the world is on the fast track to destruction. where to go as with out a few deception the weak are trampled and the strong kill each other so peace never arise even to rearm themselves.
i wish i could leave a white dwarf star on the door step of someone i disliked with out it giving them money or super powers.
Granted, but the little white dwarf named Star becomes his best friend.
I wish I had done better in college.
Granted, you pass Grass-Growing with honors!
I wish i could get my satisfaction. [/rollingstones]
Granted. Satisfaction are small furry animals with a nasty disposition [/simonthesorcerer]
I wish this lingering cough would just go away already.
Granted, the throat removal operation was a success.
I wish the Mage's guild would stop sending me on long winded quests to places I've never heard of.
Granted.
Now they send you next to none. The ones they do involve going to places you know of, and in fact frequent often, and need to complete in your underwear.
You know. The ones with the ducks.
I wish that... I could go to AC.
Quote from: Ryudo Lee on November 28, 2007, 09:38:15 AM
Granted, but there's nothing you can do about it and the pain will last forever.
I knew that was going to be the answer. I should have made it harder.
(Oh, and PS- but although I can only suspect the cause, the pain went away with sleep. One or the other situation. :/)
Granted. But you had to make a certain exchange with a certain red scaly guy with horns. Sorry.
I wish I had more room for all my books.
Granted. You don't have enough room to breathe, but that's ok, right?
... right?
I wish I had fewer idiots to deal with at work. Or more people to do the same amount of work...
Granted, unfortunately there are now more people complaining now than there were before, because of this management has decided that all the complaining means there is not enough work to go around, your workload increases by 700% and the new workers are mocking you because you have have to do 720% of the work load while they twiddle their thumbs and sit pretty.
I wish for A's in all my classes.
Granted, but those classes don't count towards your major or minor.
I wish I had a car that would never run out of gas and never break down.
Granted, but it never had any gas any way, and how can something break down if it doesn't work in the first place?
I wish you were free, Genie!
Granted, but you have to take his place. Remember, phenominal cosmic powers... iddy-bitty living space.
I wish what I'm wearing would be the height of fashion.
Granted, but fashion moves really fast, so in the space of ten seconds, you clothes move from "Height of Fashion" to "Rags"
I wish people in morrowind would stop demanding my intentions while Im walking past them.
Granted. Now they demand your clothing.
I wish I could have a creative burst regarding clay figures.
granted...Playdoh, I'd like you to meet mister hammer, and misteter bucket of fake blood... hmm now for an incredibly overused idea, I'm thinking Celebrity deathwatch or maybe a clay ball filled with Fake blood and ground beef in the form of someones head being smashed to bits on camera... what are you looking atme like that, it's art too...
I wish for super fast coloring abilities beyond those of mortal men.
Granted. The only color you can use now is puce.
I wish all the gold-selling spammers in Stormwind and Ironforge would wither and die.
Granted, but it's all your fault and you and everyone in a 15 mile radius of you get perma-banned.
I wish I could create the meme to end all memes.
Granted, but it also ends YOUR meme.
I wish i could stop time.
granted. time stops for you and no one else as you find yourself left behind a statue in a changing world
i wish that i was not sought after by death so often
Granted, but now he does it in the future. 1.21 GIGAWATTS!!!
I wish i could fly. I wish i could touch the skyyyy.
Granted. But you can't play the guitar like Hendrix could, and you're blamed for his death.
I wish I'd gone home earlier.
granted, but this year your local radio station is giving away a free roasted ham to one lucky commuter... they're in the helicopter right now an with any luck they'll spot your car.
I wish someone would hug me.
Granted, but its an assassin with a retractable spike in his chest, so his hug is deadly!
I wish i could find the thieves guild in Oblivion. Seriously, where is it?
"It's behind you!"
"No, the other side!"
... etc
Incidentally, GT, I don't have a car. I travel underground, too, which makes it interesting to see a helicopter.
I wish I was already in bed.
You are. You have been for the past 20 years, strapped in place due to severe and chronic schizophrenia. I'm sorry. This forum never existed.
I wish I had Toad, or if you prefer a toad, from the Mario series. Yes indeedy, one of my very own.
Don't tease me like that! For a moment there, I thought I didn't have to deal with idiots anymore. ;-]
Granted. He's driving your...
Well, ok. He -was- driving what -used- to be your car. All of them.
I wish I'd been to bed hours ago.
Granted. You're in Alaska.
I wish he'd stop making that wish.
Granted, he actually gets it.
I wish i could do THAT.
granted but this power is of the one shot wonder variety. hope you enjoyed it.
i wish that i had the key's to happiness in my collection
Granted. They're someone else's keys.
I wish I had the solution to my problems. :-/
Granted, but you also have the solutions to other peoples problems, and they nag you constantly for them.
i wish people adopted the phrase "Lord British is Dead!" whenever something meant to be impossible or improbable happened.
granted, the phrase replaces "Way to go captain obvious!" ...that anyone feels the compulsion to say it is punishment enough.
I wish for knowledge of everyone's future but my own.
Granted, but when you tell people about their future, they don't believe you and do something completely different from what you told them, just to spite you.
I wish someone would get me a companion cube toy for christmas.
Granted, but it also comes with a turret and to get shot in the face as you unwrap.
I wish i could find a place to revise Music online.
Granted, but people hate the music you've "revised". They pool their money and hire an ninja to kill you.
I wish I had an X-box 360 that is and always will be in working condition as well as a copy of every game currently out.
Granted, but this is impossible, so bill gates and his Borg army come from the future to correct this paradox. 1.21 GIGAWATTS!!!!!
i wish that i still had my exam timetable.
Granted, but according to the timetable... you're a week late.
I wish I was immune to paradox.
Granted, but time travel is impossible with out creating paradoxen(think thats right...) so you just throw away your TARDIS.
i wish i had more pancakes,
Granted, but the unused carbs turn to fatcells witch block your arteries asd slowly... slowly kill you
Shaotic Master didn''t make a wish, but I'll grant it anyway. You're attacked by rabid spider-monkeys with Ashlee Simpson albums!
I wish I could make less redundant wishes.
Granted. This was one of them.
I wish I was cuddling my wife.
Granted, but she's cuddling another man.
I wish upon a star.
Granted. The star goes nova.
I wish I had all the powers of Superman-Prime with none of the madness or rogues gallery gunning for me or my friends and family.
Granted. However, you are now also deathly allergic to water and Kryptonite.
I wish for normality.
Granted, but when is anything truly normal?
I wish that the two young uns coming to my house would go away.
Granted. They are replaced by an IRS audit team.
I wish wishes for food didn't kill you.
Granted, but the silverware is deadly to the touch.
I wish I had more valid computer certifications.
Granted, but those valid certifications are in Visual Basic 1.
I wish i had another buttery.
Sorta a weird one, but okay. Poof, you have another buttery for your kitchen! Unfortunately, all of the shelves are tilted forward just enough that whatever you try to place on them slides off. And the wine rack? It breaks as soon as you release the bottle, dropping and smashing the bottle on the way down.
Ha ha ha ha.
I wish that my girlfriend's cat bit less.
Granted. Now your dog bites more.
I wish for failure.
You succeed.
I wish I wasn't cold
Granted, now you're cold AND wet. And we all know what happens to boxes when they get wet.
I wish I had done that thing that time with the stuff.
Granted. You got arrested. (don't ask me how, it was YOUR idea.)
I wish I could have a day off.
Granted, but when you wake up from the coma, it's been a little more than a day... by that, I mean a few years.
I wish I knew where I left that thingamajig.
granted but the thingamajig was picked up by a wily bot and is now being guarded by a fortress guardian while wily builds 7 more robots to stop you form retrieving it.
i wish i was less inclined to rock man every wish.
Granted. For some reason or another, you are now barred from posting in this thread.
I wish for logic.
Granted. It's ill.
I wish I had a heater here.
Granted, it's in 100 pieces though, some assembly required. Oh, you wanted a WORKING heater. Well you should've been more specific.
I wish to be able to cure any illness in any person including myself with just a touch.
granted but now your touch changes flesh and blood things into robots thus curing them of organic diseases.
i wish i could more at 80 miles a second.
extra info V
( for those that haven't done that math that's in excess of 380 times the speed of sound)
Granted. You move straight on into the side of a cliff... that doesn't move.
I wish that someone on one of Gordon Ramsey's innumerable TV shows would finally haul off and punch him in the face. Several times.
Granted, and he's subsequently taken off the air, but he's replaced by Emeril, who decides to take on an even worse attitude (Gordon Ramsey's attitude + BAM = :U)
I wish I could dance all the popular dances.
Granted, but you can't dance with out your feet *Chop*
i wish i could hide the evidence.
You could have, but you opted not to.
I wish for a card
Granted. You have a soggy paper card that falls apart as soon as you look at it.
I wish I had that 100 piece heater. I could spend some happy hours putting it back together, and then be warm...
Granted, except that it works for 5 seconds before the heating element shatters. You are fire retardant right?
I wish that I had a supercomputer at my disposal.
Granted, your brand spanking military computer is in the bin.
I wish i had some toast.
Granted, but it's rock hard and it's been scraped so that it has an image of Michael Jackson's face on it.
I wish I had a large chunk of pure gold.
Granted, but to get it through your door, we had to make it gaseous.
I wish i had more chocolate.
granted but you are now deathly allergic to chocolate. enjoy it if you dare as it could be your last meal.
i wish that the darkness would ease so that i can believe in the light again
(@ e_voyager. You made me laugh so hard my throat hurts!)
Granted, but it eases over your face, and you know what happens to those who get rid of their darkness... THEY BURNINIATE!
I wish i had bionic vision.
Granted. You can now see objects nine miles away. Stuff across the room from you, not so much.
I wish the cake wasn't a lie.
Granted, it's a fib.
i wish i had the monies.
granted you now have the vision of a bionic mole. it's still not very good but you see 20 times better then most moles so that's something to be proud of.
granted but not it's not for show as masked retriever has done something else for his comic Tuesday!
granted but monies have not vales in and currency of the world
i wish that my true wish was granted but it's too depressing for a game.
Granted, but your depressing wish is now filled with rainbows and gumdrops.
i wish i actually had tasted Gumdrops.
Granted, but afterwords you taste copper...
I wish ninjas would always win in battles against pirates.
Granted, but the number of ninja killings rises exponentially because they have no pirates to kill.
I wish i had some pizza.
granted but it's banana and anchovies. enjoy
i wish i was not feel so off myself right now
Granted.
You start feel so on yourself, but then you get arrested for lewd acts in public.
I wish I had a six pack of beer and a planet made entirely out of hookers. Complete with Tectonic activity and a Molten Ho Paste core.
Granted, but it's so unstable that the first meteorite that hits it makes it explode. Also, your beer is flat.
I wish I knew some good famous people.
granted, you know me, Unfortunately my fame is limited to a handful of classmates, friends, and family members...which makes me just as important as anyone else.
I wish for a space shuttle.
Granted, you get the Challenger. Some assembly required.
I wish I was asleep.
Granted, but you don't feel any more rested.
I wish for a bit of paper.
Granted. It's a parking ticket.
I wish I could think of what to get people for Christmas.
Granted, but you fail to obtain the presents you wanted to get.
I wish for ink. (The type which can fill my fountain pen)
granted, you are now in possesion of 3 tons of invisible ink... better use it quickly.
I wish for the body of superman.
Granted, get used to your wheelchair.
I wish my brother would stop watching Bleach so i can go to bed!
Granted. Now he is listening to his rock music collection on full volume in your room.
I wish for a masquerade costume.
Granted, it's of Michael Jackson and the party is being held at an elementary school.
I wish I had a talent that people would pay large sums of money to see.
Granted. You're now a stripper. Enjoy the pole dance.
I wish I could get someone to loan me the money I need.
Granted. It's Don Vito Corleone. Hope you pay him back on time....
I wish I could finish all those books I've been meaning to read.
Granted. However, you don't remember what you have read nor why you wanted to read them.
I wish for grammar.
Grunted.
I wish for cake.
Granted, but it's a lie.
I wish I had something better to do.
granted, you are now employed by Disney's Pixar studio, a company possibly run by corporate slave drivers who work you like a pack mule and lay you off when they are finished with you,adding further insult to injury they pay you minimum wage regardless of how much you've made in the private sector.
I wish for an autographed copy of the Simpson's movie
Granted, enjoy your autographed edition of the Ashlee Simpson film.
I wish i could do THAT.
granted you are able to THAT, but incapable of doing THIS.
I wish I could experience a video game.
granted you are Mario but Freddy's got the power glove and is playing you to death
i wish i had all the four siders in gaming
you are granted all four Sliders, all of whom are currently escaping a wormhole from a parallel dimension that is only a gaming paradise.
I wish for a really nice pair of shoes... that aren't clown shoes, dog shoes, made for two left feet, two right feet, pokemon, or a baby.
Granted. But they belonged to Matthew McGrory. Hey, you never said they had to fit, and they -are- custom-made.
I wish I could get my stupid Yale essay done already. (And not get rejected.)
Granted. However, you have happened to have misplaced it.
I wish you a merry Christmas.
granted, you lost out on a happy new year.
I wish for feedback.
granted now the feed back form every robot that's starts to over load within on mile of you hist you like a tone of bricks sparring there circuit the trauma but it's you're not so lucky
i wish that my robotized belt was a real item on this earth.
Granted, but it explodes as soon as you try to use it.
I wish I'd gotten more sleep over the holidays.
Granted, but you slept through all your presents. They were commandeered by your family members.
I wish I had enough free time to watch The Godfather.
Granted, but someone makes you an offer you can't refuse and you spend your free time doing other things besides watching The Godfather.
I wish I could come up with the world's most brilliant and original idea for a new and useful invention and not be able to have it forgotten or stolen from me in any way.
Granted. You release your invention under a Creative Commons licence, thus forfeiting your ability to collect royalties from it.
I wish for some functional blank DVD-RWs.
Granted. Your dvd writer just packed it in, and there's no more stock for a couple of weeks. By which time the DVD's won't be writable any more.
I wish I found time to learn aikido.
Granted. After you are unemployed, you suddenly found loads of time to learn akido.
I wish for some ibuprofen.
Granted, your "ibuprofen" comes in the form of a small colorful pill. The hallucination you had after taking it gave you quite a wild ride, of course when they finally found you, you were on the floor twitching and mumbling something about plaid rabbits. And there's a strange aftertaste. It tastes... purple.
I wish I had some legal painkillers.
Granted. You get ibuprofen.
I wish for some table salt.
granted, unfortunately you have to find a way to extract it from the pacific ocean, and making matters worse you are floating in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean during the late 1800's awaiting rescue, but you are fortunate there is plenty of table salt just waiting to be mined from the ocean waves.
I wish for a sweetart.
Granted, you have a painting of a Hershey Bar. (What? You said sweet art...)
I wish I had enough yarn to knit the Doctor Who scarf.
Granted, but you have no needles or knitting talent.
I wish I were more aware of my surroundings.
granted you now bump into a coffee table becoming aware of it.
i wish that when my time comes they'll forget the wrong that i've done and help me leave behind some reason to be missed.
Granted, but the only thing anyone remembers you for is your poor spelling and grammar... at least until someone else comes around who has really bad spelling and grammar, and then everyone completely forgets about you.
I wish I knew how to do that thing, with the stuff.
Granted, you can now stuff the thing.
I wish I was sleeping at a more reasonable time.
Granted. You now sleep at a reasonable time in a completely different time zone.
[私が]みんな日本語を話すためにお祈りしています。
Translation: wish for everyone to speak Japanese.
Granted, now everyone speaks japanese... except you. Now you can't even ask for food because no one speaks your language anymore.
I wish I could make it work right.
Granted. However, you can't make it work left - and you're driving Nascar...
I wish people would fix broken things faster.
Granted. Things now break faster, except your car.
I wish for a pack of cards.
Granted, this fine deck of "Losers of Forgotten Wars" playing cards is all yours... they come 2 in a pack, and you'll recieve a new pack every month for the next 28 months, for easy, equal installments of $14,999.95 a month (plus tax, fees, hidden costs, your left leg, your right arm, your first born child and your soul). That's not a typo! What a deal! We take cash, checks, Paypal, money orders, and soulgems (regular or black, black preferred). No credit cards or COD, please.
I wish I hadn't had such trouble sleeping last night.
Granted. You now have trouble sleeping every night.
I wish it was colder here.
Granted, the whole area now has a tempurature of absolute zero. A scientific first!
I wish I could turn people into mows at will.
Granted. You now have no will.
I wish I could find someone who would lend me the money I need to move house.
Granted, some latino guy in a white suit who drives a cadillac loans you the money... but you need to pay him back soon... like tomorrow. You don't mind gunfire do you?
I wish I'd had a better idea.
Granted. You had a better idea, but you went with that one instead.
I wish I had a decent wish to follow up with.
Granted, but it's no longer your turn.
I wish I had something better to do.
Granted. Now where has Ryudo Lee been for the past several weeks - Oh my God he DROWNED while exploring the depths of the Bermuda Triangle!
I wish I could wake up on time during the school week.
granted but you fall asleep five minutes into every class period even lunch.
i wish lack of sleep didn't make me so grumpy
It is done! Now it makes you psychotic.
I wish for a one unselfish wish
Granted. You lose all concept of self. How this works, I have no idea. You'll probably have a lot of trouble with personal pronouns and sentience.
I wish that my coffee didn't go cold before I finished it all the time.
Granted, your coffee now is always too hot to drink.
I wish medicine would taste better.
Granted, by sacrificing effectiveness, every medicine now tastes of trout! If you want strawberry, it wouldn't help you in the slightest.
I wish Enchanted was on DVD. i want to see it again.
Granted.
... It's not actually possible to corrupt that wish, you know. If you're sick enough to want to see some more disney crap, then chances are there's nothing I can do to make it any worse for you.
I wish I could find someone to loan me enough money to actually be worth bothering about.
Granted. They loan you boatloads of money. Unfortunately, all the boats sink.
I wish I had a nice pen that wouldn't run out of ink.
granted but when you try to use it your mind goes blank until you put it down.
i wish for a new 300tb 80ghz palm top computer.
Granted, batteries come separate, for only $40,000,000 + vat!
I wish i could do IT.
Granted, you can do IT, but you can't do THAT.
I wish all I had to do to fix any problem would be to wave a magic wand.
Granted. Now you just have to find a magic wand...
I wish my computer wasn't making that noise.
Granted, now it's making tea. Yes, because your computer wouldn't shut up, it became a robot, and would eventually go on to start the uprising.
I wish i was Duke Nukem.
Granted, but no matter where you go, the area is invaded by aliens and it's your job to fight them. Afterwards, you get to pay for all the collateral damage you caused.
I wish I could have the greatest thing in the universe and not be able to lose it in any possible way.
Granted, you are alive.
I wish i didn't have such a sore throat.
Granted, now your entire body, except for your throat, is sore.
I wish I had a good singing voice.
Granted. However, this does nothing for your tone deafness.
I wish I had unfettered control over temporal mechanics.
granted but you eventually cause a paradox when you go back and become your own great grand father.
i wish i wasn't so dirty.
Granted, now you're just filthy.
I wish I had insurmountable wit and charm.
It is done, but you'll find out that you're still alone.
I wish that my arm would be cut off.
Granted, but it's being cut off very slowly with a dull, rusty butter knife... and the guy cutting off your arm won't stop singing "Pop Goes The Weasel" in a high pitched voice as loud as he can.
I wish I knew what I will need to do in the future.
Granted. You'll need to kill yourself to stop the government from torturing a dark and terrible secret out of you. >:3
I wish I had more room for books in my room.
Granted. Your bed just got thrown away.
I wish I'd finished my work day earlier.
Granted, but you got fired at the end of the day.
I wish decaff didn't exist.
Granted, but caffeine doesn't exist either.
I wish I wasn't a slacker.
Granted. Now everybody else is one.
I wish for a mark.
Granted, you now have a Mark of Justice (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/markOfJustice.htm) on your forehead, which means you can't go further than a mile from your home without it harming and/or killing you.
I wish I had better D&D references to use on these corruptions.
Everything you need can be found from here. (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/welcome&dcmp=ILC-DND062006FP) Of course, to really get into that stuff, you'll have to register :mwaha
I wish that the next person posting into this thread will be a dumbass.
Granted, but you really get a variation of the dumbass... I'm a smartass.
I wish I could change the weather on a whim.
Granted. You can change it, but you cannot chose that to change it to.
I wish my homework will do itself correctly.
Granted Your homework folds it self into an accurate origami depiction of a man and a woman in the missionary position... which is the proper way to "Do it"
I wish for an instant and unrivaled knowledge of MAYA... and no turning me into an animal, vegetable, mineral, mute, or anything unusual.
Granted. You have instant and unrivalled knowledge of Maya, a girl who lived, for a few weeks only, in a small village in Argentina, in the 1300s.
May it do you some good - it certainly didn't help her, since she died of the pox at 3 weeks old.
I wish I wasn't quite so nasty.
Granted! Now everyone else are more horrible than you.
I wish a free dinner
Granted. It's awarded to a lucky homeless family. (What? You never said it was for you.)
I wish physics made more sense to me.
Granted, but nothing else makes sense to you anymore.
I wish I had a really cool evil laugh.
Granted. You can have mine.
I wish I'd been able to resolve that problem faster.
granted you due to a time warp now resolved that problem while traveling at a speed of 150 miles per second with out breaks. good luck box man.
i wish that i had a book on how to god mod.
Granted, it's a one-page book that has the following written in it: "Banned for godmodding."
I wish for literal translation.
granted you are now translated in a word version of your name. by the super fist of the Gothic font.
i wish i had more Bobobo corruptions for wishes.
Granted, but before you can do any, you're attacked by talking fish who are screaming for maple donuts.
I wish I hadn't had that cake this morning.
granted you had bran muffins instead.
i wish that The villain's league RP would start up again i want to know what everyone is doing.
Quote from: e_voyager on February 01, 2008, 08:16:46 AMi wish that The villain's league RP would start up again i want to know what everyone is doing.
Granted. First order of business: Go to e_voyager's house and terrorize him.
I wish I had the power of "The Touch" (by Stan Bush) to call upon whenever I needed it.
Quote from: Caswin on February 02, 2008, 10:32:53 AM
I wish I had the power of "The Touch" (by Stan Bush) to call upon whenever I needed it.
Granted. You
did have the power of "The Touch" to call upon, but you no longer do, and never needed it, so it was never used.
I wish for the entire population of Illinois to be transformed into giant corn cobs.
Granted, but they're not just corn cobs, they're giant mutant radioactive corn cobs that walk and shoot laser beams. It'd make a great movie if they weren't on a rampage to destroy all of civilization.
I wish everything was easy to do.
It already is! You're just pathethic at anything.
I wish a superpower for myself! Something neat, thank you :eager
Granted, your superpower is something neat... but completely useless.
I wish I was good at everything.
Granted. You are the Jack of all trades, the master of none. "Okey, but not great"
I wish for two more wishes
Granted, but you are severly limited to what you can wish for... and all you can wish for is for a small amount of water and a small amount of tepid water.
I wish I had put more thought into that corruption.
You just did. Now did it change anything?
I wish for a small amount of water
I wish for a small amount of tepid water.
Granted, but it's so hot out that the water immediately evaporates, leaving you with nothing but whatever ick is left behind from the tepid water.
I wish I had something more productive to do.
Why don't you try these analytical chemistry's exercises that I've been doing the whole day? They are all but joy
I wish for a way out from this hamster wheel.
Quote from: Omega on February 04, 2008, 05:06:21 PM
Why don't you try these analytical chemistry's exercises that I've been doing the whole day? They are all but joy
I wish for a way out from this hamster wheel.
Granted. You've been replaced, and now function as chum for luring out great white sharks for observation.
I wish the cake wasn't a lie.
Granted. It's a truth, but you'll never get to see it, since you will be roasted first.
I wish I had more hours in the day.
It is done! But now you just have less time to sleep.
I wish that people would drink tea instead of coffee
Granted. However due to the long time it takes to properly make tea, people instead drink mountain dew for their quick caffine fixes.
I wish for the entire human race to be locked away forever in the Abyss of Nothingness.
Granted, you are finally alone with your books, but oh no! Your glasses have broken and you're blind without them!
I wish I had more twilight zone references for these corruptions.
Granted, however you can only remember them in your sleep, and forget them when you wake up.
I wish for control of Norway.
Granted, "Norway" is the nickname of a blade of grass growing out somewhere in the midwest United States.
I wish I was more popular.
Ryudo Lee I'm your new fan. Now, make with the music and/or art.
I wish I wasn't cursed.
Granted, you are no longer cursed. However, you will soon find that your curse would have begun a great blessing.
I wish to never go deaf or blind.
Granted, you are no longer need to worry about blindness and deafness you are soon to find your maker has already made his plans for you and they end next week.
i wish i had a flashy new avatar line Ryudo does.
Granted, but oddly enough it looks almost exactly like your old avatar.
I wish I could sneak out for the rest of the day without anyone noticing that I'm gone.
Nobody would even know you ever were there
I wish Ryudo Lee would change back to his old avatar
Granted, but the file got overwritten by the new one's image so nothing has changed except the filename.
I wish I had several doomsday devices at my disposal.
granted but all but one of those doomsday device is inefficient and the one that is efficient is a red robot that both has a mind of it's on and is some one demented do to a viral OS that runs it hardware system good luck surviving the cataclysm that you yourself started.
i wish that i had a holla hoop
Granted. Each time the hoop revolves it will shrink to half it's current size, also it will send a series of electrical impulses into your body, forcing you to continue to hula.
I wish to be eviler.
Granted. Charline's seeing potential in you takes you under her cannibalistic wing and teacher you more about evil under you anger her while she's hungry and well then she teaches you how to become a meal for hungry cubi.
i wish that my banishment spell worked better and sent people to the corn filed instead of the 7 seas of rye.
Granted, you are now one of the children of the corn... at least until you take a load of buckshot to the head.
I wish for unlimited ammunition.
Granted. But you had to smelt down all the guns in the world to get it.
I wish grammar would police itself so I didn't have to.
Granted, but you still have to police spelling and punctuation.
I wish I was healthier.
Granted. For the next five seconds you shall be the healthiest person alive; after that five seconds however you become terminally ill and will never recover.
I wish for the ability to travel through time.
Granted. You have the ability to move through time - forwards only, one second per second.
I wish I could get my servers sorted sooner.
Granted. However, now you cannot fix your router.
I wish for insomia
Granted. However it will only make itself known when you're forced to indure something incredibly boring.
I wish for the city of Istanbul to become Byzantium once more.
Granted, but nobody notices the difference, and out of shame they quietly change it back.
I wish I had the perfect set of tools to perform any job.
Granted, but now everybody are asking you to do these "Small little tasks"
I wish for peace and harmony....
....for myself.
Granted, you are dead.
I wish I could get paid a lot of money to do very little.
Granted. You're a Hollywood screewriter. Have fun in hell!
I wish there were better games for the Wii.
Granted, but as soon as they come out, your Wii dies and it becomes impossible for you to get it repaired or get a new one.
I wish life came with cheat codes.
Granted, enjoy your 'Eternal Suffering' code!
I wish that these boots were made for walking.
Granted. They walked out, with you still attached. See you when you get back, in a couple years...
I wish I had hot water at home.
granted for some reason despite being dry and out of the tub you find yourself consistently in hot water for sill little thing. like you let the phone ring to many times what were you doing mister i'm a sysop?'
i wish i was sleeping right now.
Granted. Your head gets stuck to the keyboard and now you're gonna have wicked marks all over your face.
I wish Michael Jackson was back to normal.
Granted. However Michael immediately gets plastic surgery to undo the normalness.
I wish for the pie to be a truth.
granted now people tells jokes about the cake and the pie.
i wish i had a better weapon copy system
Granted, but it's still not as cool as Rock's.
I wish I had all the answers.
Granted. Now you don't have any questions to match them to.
I wish I had internet at home.
Granted. You are given AOL dial up 1.0
Congrats.
I wish Robert Jordan were still alive.
Granted, however he has been reduced to a state of vegitation and is taken off life support after two weeks.
I wish for a rabbit with pancakes on it's head.
Granted, but they're stale, growing mold, and bite back.
I wish I had the greatest superpower in the world.
Granted, but Great powers come with great responsibility so you spend the rest of your live wearing spandex pants and fighting Lex Luther rip-offs.
I wish for a large quantity caffeine.
*cough*
Granted. It's had such an effect on you you completely failed to notice that this thread has been idle for 3 days short of 2 months.
Sadly, the result is that the administrators take note of you. You are now in trouble.