The Vend-o-mat 9000

[Rakala]

The machine spits out a half melted, half rolo.

*inserts a garrote wire*

[Corgatha Taldorthar]

THe Vend-O-Mat spits out a picture of Luca Brasi covered in a fish.

*inserts an estoc*

[Cogidubnus]

Inigo Mantoya pops out and begins chasing after the six-fingered man.

*inserts mask*

[Angel]

First, a sword sticks out and carves a "Z" on your shirt. Then, through some miracle of physics, Zorro pops out riding Tornado off into the distance.

*inserts a jar of peanut butter*

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

The Vend-o-mat fails to dispense anything, being irretrievably clogged up with peanut butter.

And stuck to the roof of your mouth.


*inserts coin*

[e_voyager]

The Vend-o-mat 9000 dispenses a tube of toothpaste.

insert comic book

[Rakala]

The Vend-o-Mat gives you a life size statue of Batman.

*inserts a GI Joe action figure*

[Angel]

The machine dispenses Cobra Commander, crushing the GI Joe and jetpacking off before you can get an autograph.

(inserts a page from the novel, Fight Club)

[Slowtini]

Pink Soap pops out.

-Inserts the novel "Nightlife" by Rob Thurman-

[Rakala]

Two copies of "Nightlife" pop out.

*inserts a one eyed one horned flying purple people eater*

[Slowtini]

Nothing good comes out.
Then again, Good is relative.

*inserts AN EPIC SONG*

[Noone]

The vend-o-mat ejects tons of EA hating gamers who come and erase the song and all mentions of it's existence.

*inserts concentrated stupidity*

[Slowtini]

You pop out! *gasp*

*inserts MUPPETS*

[Noone]

A slinky comes out and strangles you in an extremely violent fashion.

*Inserts extreme violence*

[Slowtini]

UltraViolence pops out, and boy does he look pissed.

*inserts sixteen iPod Nanos*

[Jairus]

One iPod Tera comes out.

*inserts one Knightmare Frame activation key*

[Slowtini]

SUDDENLY
USB KEYCHAIN DONGLES
HUNDREDS OF THEM.

*kicks the Vend-o-mat*

[Jairus]

A sign pops out. WARNING: DO NOT TAUNT VEND-O-MAT 9000

*inserts Happy Fun Ball*

[Mao]

A Happy Fun Rock pops out.

*inserts a coin*

[Rakala]

The coin pops out. The Vend-O-Mat needs exact change, or so it says.

*inserts a *

[Corgatha Taldorthar]

The Vend-O-Mat spits teeth.


*inserts festering ooze*

[Slowtini]

A tar monster pops out of the Vend-o-mat, and it demands hugs.

*inserts bad karma*

[shadowterm]

dispenses bad luck

inserts chaos. (No. not the sonic character.)

[Slowtini]

Order pops out, and it wishes to have a word with you.

*inserts boot*

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

The Vend-o-mat 9000 dispenses a boot to the head.

*inserts ice-cream*

[Mao]

The Vend-o-mat 9000 dispenses a slightly used waffle cone.

*inserts a pb&j sandwich*

[Rakala]

The Vend-O-Mat dispenses licked bread.

*inserts a switchblade*

[Angel]

Out pops a copy of West Side Story.

(inserts the air)

[Rakala]

The Vend-O-Mat dispenses carbon dioxide directly in your face.

*inserts a feather*

[Cogidubnus]

It spits out a chicken.

*inserts an egg*