Corrupt a Wish, Part Deux

[Zedd]

Granted its directly up your ass permently unfortunately every time its lost the medical team are left baffled each time it gets up there,Enjoy the KY gel!

I wish pirateting was taken more seriously

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, now it's an even more serious offense.  Even the smallest report of piracy is responded to by groups of SWAT teams, Marines, and Navy SEALs.

I wish I could stop myself from reading other people's e-mails.

[the name is SPARKS]

granted,your eyes shall be riped out your head everytime you attempt to read someone else's e-mail

i wish the world wasnt so happy

[Jim Halisstrad]

Granted.  You open your eyes and you look at the state of the world.  You realize that in a lot of countries that there is starvation, pestilence and war.  You realize that some people have to work twelve ####ing hours a day just to make ends meat.

You realize that the world ISN'T a happy place or you just sit in your room listening to Linken Park being emo because you don't have the GUTS to actually ENJOY LIFE.


I wish I had an Icecream cone.

[e_voyager]

granted you now have and ice cream cone with no ice cream but lucky you it's earwax flavor so at least it's not a total loss.

i wish that i had more souls form my collection

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted you now have a "Souls Form" for your collection of needless  forms you have to fill out at the department of motor vehicles.


I wish I had a million and two cookies that were all really tasty, healthy, and never spoil...and no giving me diabetes, or a cavity, or turning me into a cookie too nonsense. 

[Roureem Egas]

Granted. They'll be yours for an undisclosed amount of cash, and a contract that you have to sign. After that, they'll be yours in maybe...25 years from now.

I wish my flash drive (and the brush I like for that matter) will turn up pretty quickly.

[e_voyager]

granted but the turn up water logged and half melted.

i wish that i didn't have to deal with all these problems from a simple typos.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. You have to deal with them from multiple, extremely complex typos.



I wish I wasn't afflicted with niceness.

[Angel]

Granted. You are now a complete creep and an impolite jerk who many people say symbolizes the decline of society. Seriously, what was supposed to be good about that wish?

I wish so many civilians hadn't died in the Iraq War.

[the name is SPARKS]

granted many civilians survived but they are sevearly injured and will die after the war

i wish i wasnt bored

[Cogidubnus]

Granted. You are placed in the middle of a high-stakes kill or be killed manhunt, in which you are being hunted by dozens of dangerous and unsavory individuals competing for your head, and the million dollar prize that it brings.

I wish I had a wireless card that worked.

[Valynth]

Granted, unfortunately it only works under 1000 feet water.  Too bad the rest of your compy doesn't.

I wish the media didn't twist issues to support any of the sides involved in their reporting.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, now they're just blunt about it, their ratings go down, and get taken over by MSNBC.

I wish there was something good on all tv channels at any given time of the day.

[Angel]

Granted, but sooner or later, every really good TV show runs out of good episodes... prepare yourself for a lot of reruns.

I wish I had a better work ethic.

[e_voyager]

granted you now have the work ethic  of the loyal samurai and just a hard a boss.

i wish more of a chance to test my power in the real world.

[Zedd]

Granted, Yet everyone hates you for it and your powers become too great and you kill the first thing that opressed you

I wish I wish I never squished that fish....

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, the fish that you tried to squish was the dreaded penderu, the fish swam up your willie and laid its eggs in there causing you great pain everytime you take a piss ...no worries, the hospital where you are being treated hired a specialist who can fix that little problem, Zedd, I'd like you to meet miss Lorena Bobbit the specialist I was tell ing you about.

I wish for the next poster to have the desire to flush the toilet and sing My country tis of thee or equivalent whenever they hear his/her name spoken backwards. 

[Caswin]

I wish for the next poster to have the desire to flush the toilet and sing My country tis of thee or equivalent whenever they hear his/her name spoken backwards. 

"Niwsac".
Hee hee!  Isn't that entertaining?  Almost makes up for the fact that had to break into your house to flush your toilet with you on it.

I wish to teach the world to sing. (To sing, specifically, something other than the most irritating song I know.)

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted everyone learns the second most annoying song in the world unfortunately "this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because.....

The song is forever ingrained in the psyche of every English speaking county on the planet, and like Freddy Kruger, the song keeps coming back to haunt it's victims forever and ever, just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because, this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because,this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because, this is a song that doesn't end, and just goes on and on my friend, some people started sing it not knowing what it was, and now they got to sing this song forever just because...Damn you Caswin!!!

I wish for "the song that doesn't end" to have an ending, that doesn't conclude in death.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, it concludes in a massive stroke that leaves the singer in a vegetative state for the rest of his/her life.

I wish I could turn myself invisible at will, and turn visible again at will.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Unfortunately, you don't quite realise the limitations and effects, and only switch when standing in front of a William. Good luck with that...



I wish I could behave somewhat better...

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but now you're boring.

I wish I had a pad of Sticky Notes that never ran out and never lost their sticky.

[vulpesweasel]

granted, but you get SO excited about your new sticky pad note pad that you stick them on your eyes and they get stuck their FOREVER, so you try to pull them off and get your hands stuck to them, so now your blind AND your fingers are in your eyes. How unfortunate!

I wish for free long distance phone service

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Only one syllable, at random, in every three, is audible to either end. That makes it a bit difficult to hold a conversation. Or to pass data, either....



I wish... for a nice peaceful day where I get lots done.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but every other day for the rest of your life is stressful and full of annoying distractions.

I wish coffee would keep me awake for longer during the day, but still allow me to get at least 8 hours of sleep every night.

[e_voyager]

granted thanks to a new physiological change that your body goes through one helping of coffee can give you up to 16 hours are alert activity unfortunaly it's only effective if you don't go over the reccemend helping  of 5ml. any more and your up for 72 hours and less and you're sleep in 20 minutes. good luck with your now.

i wish people wold stop wishing for super powers.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, unfortunately the world is full of superheroes and your the only one who is normal.


I wish I knew where my textbook was.

[e_voyager]

granted you now know that it is shredded mulch in the school botany lab. good luck using it.

h no i'm normal.. of wait i've never been normal with or without super powers and at least i'm not a zombie.

i wish i had a working now glitchy holo-gaming system

[GabrielsThoughts]

Granted you now have a working but new glitchy Halo-gaming system. enjoy your 60 gigabyte tower and CRT monitor my friend.

I wish for something cool to happen.