2014/01/01 [Amazing Emails for the New Year]

[Rafe]

Well, sometimes these kind of weird things happen.  And with some people, FWing emails validates their existence, that and they have some kind of irresistible force which doesn't allow them to leave such gems as these to sit unforwarded.   Problem with hitting the SEND button is that once it goes - it's gone, and you can't bring it back.

As a side note, I watched The Secret of NIMH for the first time in years, and noticed that Wil Wheaton (like 10 years old at the time) was the voice of Martin.

...uhm, I seem to be rambling a bit.  Sorry.

[LoneHowler]

I think my brain blanked out about midway through the email, it tends to do that when faced with so much stupidity. Normally I delete chains with predjudice, especially the cutesy hug ones. This monstrosity had to be scrolled through, mainly because I enjoyed Amber's mocking of it

[Wanderer]

I think I kind of read most of the poem part of that before my brain turned off and refused to process anything other than Amber and Fluffy's comments.

[Drakkenmensch]

So, what DOES happen to those who don't resend it? Does "terrible bad things happen to someone you love" or does a crazy knife wielding emo girl appear to stab you? It seems to promise both in different parts of the email.

I suddenly feel like I lost 30 IQ points for having taken the time to actually read the whole thing.

[Howl]

Truly, this is the God that other chain letters sacrifice livestock to.

[meltingface101]

Is  posting  it  in  such  a  format  similar  to  emailing  it 

[ArchTeryx]

You know, Amber, I do believe you've found the King of Stupid among chain letters (and I have to deal with the right-wing conspiracy-theory ones on a routine basis).  Just...wow.

I'm surprised Fluffy survived the experience without spontaneously combusting about halfway through it.

[ZacAttac21]

Bat Fluffy! Na na na na na na na na...

[YawnPB]

Sounds like the frankenstein's monster of chain letters.... Piece of this, chunk of that, and a cup of crazy for spice.

[joshofspam]

First it threatens you. Then it feels like the poem is trying to guilt you into talking more to old dear friends. Then it side swipes you and threatens you to spread the email instead of taking care of your friend.........

I don't think I like this chain letters tone.

[Insert Witty Name]

Wow, my brain tried to escape so I gave up halfway through. I feel for Amber having to read that all   And here I thought the sort of people who sent those emails had all migrated to FacePlant.  I guess it's too newfangled for some of them  

Oh, and a belated Happy New Year, everyone!

[seikueon]

I really didn't know chain letters still existed.  It seems like I don't really get "personal" emails anymore, so that'd explain it.  I can't believe I read the whole thing.

[CrimsonButterfly]

Well. I don't read those things in order, if I do.

Reminds me of the asteroids game. Where the asteroids keep on breaking into smaller chunks without end.

I'm not sure where the big ones come from. Seems like they'd take a truckload of time to build.

[Kuzma Volkov]

Bat Fluffy! Na na na na na na na na...

Now the question that remains is Amber Alfred or Robin?

[ZacAttac21]

Bat Fluffy! Na na na na na na na na...

Now the question that remains is Amber Alfred or Robin?

Naw bro, she'd definitely be Batgirl. No no, wait! CATWOMAN!

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Naw bro, she'd definitely be Batgirl. No no, wait! CATWOMAN!

... so, she'd be fawning all over Fluffy? That seems wrong somehow...

[ArchTeryx]

I really didn't know chain letters still existed.  It seems like I don't really get "personal" emails anymore, so that'd explain it.  I can't believe I read the whole thing.

There are a ton of chain emails around.  They tend to break into three basic categories: Right-wing conspiracy theories (which, from the looks of my box, are the majority of them, and certainly the most virulent), what I refer to as "hug-me" emails mostly sent around by little old ladies, and pyramid scams.

Occasionally, they'll mate and give birth to some truly unholy offspring.  This looks to be one of the offspring, and boy howdy, it's an UGLY offspring.  Poor Amber.

[Ignuus66]

Hmm... I wish I'd get things as creative as this monstrosity

[Kirrin_Shadowclaw]

Imagine if you will a chain letter so devious, stupidly simple turned creative it had to have been two separate e-mails that collided in the void of the internet and now lusts for more power!  I think that is this e-mail!  All Joking aside i'm rather intrigued with how inconsistant the e-mail is with it's own facts and yet still expects people to send it along. Though it obviously works for some reason.

[ZacAttac21]

Naw bro, she'd definitely be Batgirl. No no, wait! CATWOMAN!

... so, she'd be fawning all over Fluffy? That seems wrong somehow...

Oh hell. I hadn't thought of that. Yeah, let's just stick with Batgirl.

[Attic Rat]

No Nigerian princes? So very disappointing.
I just delete every email that contains demands to forward it.
To date, I have been horribly murdered by terrorist spammers dozens of times. But hey, that' not entirely without entertainment value.

[VAE]

Anyone's got a link to this? Missed it due to being away from net for the first three days of the year.

[meltingface101]

Anyone's got a link to this? Missed it due to being away from net for the first three days of the year.

It  should  still  be  on  kat box  I  think

http://dmfa.katbox.net/comic/behold-the-majesty/

or http://dmfa.katbox.net/wp-content/uploads/sites/15/2013/12/The_Email.jpg

[VAE]

Lawl.
That is something indeed.

[meltingface101]

If  I  read  the  whole  thing  I  might  have  gone  blind . Can  you  give  me an  overall  idea  of  what  this  technichromatic  madness  entails .

[Tapewolf]

If  I  read  the  whole  thing  I  might  have  gone  blind . Can  you  give  me an  overall  idea  of  what  this  technichromatic  madness  entails .

I had to skip a lot myself, it hurt to read.

But the gist of it is that you have something like 5 hours to send the email to 10 people, otherwise you will die in some horrible accident a few days/weeks/years later.  If you do send it in time something wonderful will happen to your love life.

After that is starts to get a bit strange - other people have bolted other things onto it, reducing the deadline to 5 minutes, increasing the goalposts to 15 or 20 people and threatening to knife the person if they did not obey... it was worth reading the final few pages just to see Amber and Fluffy dissect the conflicting instructions.

[ZacAttac21]

I pretty much got bored after the first few lines and just read what Amber and Fluffy were saying.

[Kazzellin]

My first reaction to seeing the monstrosity was "Wait, aren't chain letters illegal in the US?" followed by "Oh, right - Amber's in Canada. Poor woman." 

Still since at least two people have dissected two chain emails and fused them together, a little bit more on the part of Amber and Fluffy won't hurt it. In fact,m it has a new purpose! Making her readers laugh.  Justification at last. It must be so happy! 

[Yarott]

The purpose of this chain-mail is almost similar to that of The Ring's video tape. Don't you think that by showing this to the current and new readership, you are sentencing the DMFA World to their end? Gosh, Amber. You and your hell basket

[meltingface101]

No Nigerian princes? So very disappointing.
I just delete every email that contains demands to forward it.
To date, I have been horribly murdered by terrorist spammers dozens of times. But hey, that' not entirely without entertainment value.

Probably  from  the  Prince  of  Ryleh  or  some  similar  twisted   place  not  intended  for   the  minds  of  mortals .