Corrupt a Wish

[Kitsune Ascendant]

granted. while driving there you get abducted by aliens, and end up missing what turns out to be the best superbowl

I wish for some dilithium crystals.

[Falcarthum]

Granted. You have some deleteium crystals that erase everything they touch...

I wish that Windows were open source

[Rowne]

Granted, however you find such horrors in the code that it drives you slowly insane.  There were things that nobody knew Microsoft was doing, they were even part of an inner cartel designed to ensure that hardware would last no longer than a certain age, which means that PCs last longer with Linux, BeOS, Mac OS X or just about anything else installed.  The code is also written in the most horrible and circular way possible.

Thanks to these discoveries though, the World realizes how bad of an idea it is to run Microsoft and everyone switches over to a variant of Linux, game developers start producing exclusively for Linux and this is soon after followed by World peace, the absolution of World hunger and a cure to all diseases, including the common cold.

I wish the global enlightenment would hurry up so we could all no longer suffer colds and we could all run Linux.

[Kitsune Ascendant]

granted. however, you die from exhaustian two days before you can finish making your dream a reality.

I wish for the ability to turn anyone I hate into spam.

[roninfoxtail]

Granted, however, everyone suddenly picks the time to get on your bad side. Within a week, the people you know are now cans of lunchmeat.

I wish it wasn't so hot in Califorina.

[Lysander]

Granted, some random person honors thee with framed Super Bowl tickets, perfect for wall hanging.

This one wishes to metaphorically shoot all in his path with a surreal machine gun.

[Nikki]

Granted. You also shoot me 

i wish i was invisible

[Kitsune Ascendant]

I wish for mind reading powers so I could tell what xze-xze's wish was supposed to be.

[Nikki]

Granted. you read my mind and all you can read is Final Fantasy 7 Yaoi

i wish people would stop getting in my head...it's getting crowded!!

[Kitsune Ascendant]

everyone leaves your mind. however, it is still crowded by the afterthoughs.

I wish for a tribble. they're so cute, ya know.

[GabrielsThoughts]

Granted, however now everyone hates you because you've brought a plauge greater then mows to the human populace.

I wish that Geico would use the old Elvis Gecko from 1997-2003(yr?) for their commercials instead of the lame British gecko they're using now.
because I miss the kung foo, sportscar drving, sunglass wearing, and problem solving american gecko, no one likes the new philisophical english blowhard except philosophers.

[Kitsune Ascendant]

granted. on a related note, philosophers now have a multi-billion doller bounty on your head.


I wish for some good techno. preferably with a relatively fast beat.

[Rowne]

Granted!  You find a cache of wonderful techno, it's so good in fact that you decide to download all of it.  Further, you actually manage to do so.  So there you are, happily sitting around with your collection of techno.  You decide to queue them up so you can listen to them all at once and just as you're about to hit the play button, the Earth is hit by a contingent of strange matter and the very molecules of the Earth drift merrily apart, leaving you without an MP3 collection, an MP3 player or even a body at that.

Now you have a valid reason now to download every song from a cache of techno if you ever find one because it'll be the element that triggers the final catastrophe of Earth, the very last, you'll see!  *Nostrodamus.*

Anyway, I wish for a mindship to stop by the Earth and offer the folks of our blue baubble a lift, so I can escape this doomed planet before Ascendant finds a cache of techno.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted, however they decline to give you a lift because a) you don't know where your towel is, and b) your thumb has fallen off.


I wish for a babel fish and a guide.

[Suwako]

granted the new species of fish is poisonous and the guide speaks in tongs.

I wish I had an gaint ice cube.

[GabrielsThoughts]

I wish for a babel fish and a guide.

Granted, however the babel fish translates everything into french and corrupts your brainwaves so that you think you are a spider monkey. You also now have the first edition of the Hitchhikers Guide which is out dated and quite useless to a spider monkey.

I wish I had an gaint ice cube.

Granted you now have a giant Icecube, but you are now a pikachu.


I wish for this wish to come true.

[Kitsune Ascendant]

granted. the wish comes true, but it turns you into a mess of wavy lines that exist just to the right of the infrared spectrum.

I wish for the perfect trance song.

[Suwako]

Granted however you can't here it because some idiot mixed it with hardcore.

I wish I had by last two lones today 

[Lysander]

Granted, but because of the extra advance you get an extra interest rate to pay off.

I wish for you to riddle me this...

[tenlaius]

the riddler heres your request..and annoys you to the point of suicide!

i wish for...xze-xze's ship!

[Trevor]

Granted , but you now the impact 
I wish fore a flying ford focus

[Suwako]

granted but it has a will of its own.

I wish  I had a sun screen factor 5000 to cover my house in.

[Rowne]

Granted, except the sunscreen is so effective that the inside of your house becomes too frigid to bear.  You either have to step outside in the heat or become a naturally cryogenically frozen popsicle.

Sentient vehicles are bad?  I wish for a sentient vehicle!  Anything except an automobile will be fine.

[Saist]

Granted. you get a sentient unicyle.

I wish for Nvidia and Intel to merge!

[Jack McSlay]

granted. but now with AMD and ATI merged as well, they destroy each other

I wish to attack the giant enemy crab's weak point for massive damage

[e_voyager]

granted but the attack cause the crab to  fall on you causing massive damage to you as well.

i wish i could keep up with the separated forum better.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted, you learn about the "new" button on each thread.

And then everyone moves over and makes *lots* more posts.


... Oh. Erm. I didn't really corrupt anything, did I, since everyone is doing that anyway. Uh. Rocks fall, everyone dies! :-)


I wish I had a better answer for that previous wish :-)

[Kitsune Ascendant]

granted. it falls upon you.

I wish for the ultimate square root.

[e_voyager]

granted you have now found the SquareRoot of the universe which allows energy and matter to change form but the Knowledgage is so much  and so grand that it drives you insane. (aww i want that formula)

i wish i had more screen savers.

[CutMan]

Wish granted! But all of your screen savers are of disturbing images....like dead kittens and cute furry things being mutilated by Solid Snake with a machine gun.

I wish I had super powers that were completely controllable by me and me alone.