Corrupt A Wish Revived

[Sicill]

Granted. You have a secret underground fortress beneath your house accessible via your closet. The fortress is connected to the plumbing of every person who lives within 7 km and thus if filled up to your closet floor with their sewage.

I wish I had an energy efficient pair of headphones.

[Tyranastrasz]

Granted, you have an energy efficient pair of headphones that runs off of a "small" nuclear reactor that clips on to your mp3 player and weighs 10 pounds. One day the reactor explodes for no apparent reason, vaporizing you.

I wish I had an energy efficient vehicle

[Darkdragon]

Granted. You get a bike. Bikes have an average fuel efficiency of 382 kilometres per litre of gasoline.

I wish for some sushi.

[Lisky]

Granted, unfortunately it's from japan, and it's of the type where if not prepared right, you die... do you trust the sushi chef?

i wish i had some apple pie

[Tyranastrasz]

granted, but it's american, and it's the kind that sucks if it isn't prepared right. Do you trust the chef?

I wish for utterly perfect tuna sushi.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. It's three years old, and is current gnawing on your finger.


I wish I didn't have this hole in my tooth.

[Lysander]

Granted, you are given a cap following the root canal.

I wish for rainbow eyes.   

[Tyranastrasz]

granted, rainbows shoot out of your eyes wherever you go, and children run up to you asking where the pot o' gold is, then jump on you when you say you don't have one. You end up getting crushed by the 20 kids from across the street.

I wish I had a giant robot.

[Model Omega]

Not granted

I wish my wishes were granted.

[Tyranastrasz]

Not granted because you broke the rules.

I wish I had a giant robot.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. It's somewhat short of motive power, and the additional weight of you - or, indeed, anyone - inside it would cause it to collapse, crushing you to a wet muddy substance somewhere inside a large rusting pile of scrap metal.

It's a pretty robot, though. I just hope it doesn't rain...


I wish for some sleep.

[Lisky]

Granted, unfortunately you mixed alcohol with those sleeping pills... Boxy, you will be missed  and if you don't wake from your coma... can i have your compy?

I wish boxy would have read the warning label

[Tyranastrasz]

Granted, he does, and he never goes into the coma. You still ask him for the computer, though, and he punches you in the face.

I wish I had some rust remover, a wrench, and a ton of scaffolding.

[Model Omega]

Granted but the rust remover is old and the aerosol is out so the building you built gets rusty and actually that's sorta cool sounding... so yeah Granted.

I wish I had a dead fish so I could do what I wish.

Not granted because you broke the rules.

I wish I had a giant robot.

sorry. I didn't know. The first post said "You know the rules", but obviously I don't.

[Lisky]

Granted, the fish happens to have been from the river surrounding 3 mile island, and therefore gives you radiation poisoning... have fun with that...

I wish for one hundred billion dollars (hold pinky to corner of mouth)

[Tyranastrasz]

Granted. The cops bust in moments after you receive it and arrest you for robbing a bank.

I wish I had one hundred MEEELYON dollars in non-sequential bills that were given to me freely and legally.

[Sicill]

Granted. You receive 100 Meeelyon dollars, but because of some taxes that were enacted just before that you are left with only a horse's head in your bed.

I wish I owned the University of Michigan.

[Tyranastrasz]

Granted. It promptly burns to the ground.

I wish I had the power of Nicolas Cage in Next.

[shadowterm]

Granted, but it goes away and leaves everyone that saw you use it with a really crappy ending.

[Angel]

Your non-wish is granted with a penguin beating you with a sledgehammer.

I wish I had some non-moldy, non-raisin-filled breaed for this jar of peanut butter.

[Jairus]

Granted. It's got olives in it. Seriously, this is real bread.

I wish that Black_angel didn't have olive-filled bread.

[Tyranastrasz]

granted, angel now has grape-filled bread.

I wish I had some pepperoni pizza.

[Lisky]

Granted, though it's been sitting in your fridge for several years... and the mold growing on it has attained questionable sentience

I wish i had said mold to sell in to science...

[Angel]

Granted. Your payment is one Canadian penny.

I wish I had Silence of the Lambs on DVD, unscratched and uncut.

[Tyranastrasz]

granted, but your DVD player explodes with the disc in it.

I wish I'd downed 25-man KT >_<

[Rakala]

Granted, you down it so quickly you choke.

I wish I could wake up without being sore.

[Tyranastrasz]

Granted, you wake up without being sore. However, you can't feel anything below your nose.

I wish I didn't have to go to English class today.

[Lisky]

Granted, it's been replaced by a class on American Government taught by the infamous geno 'white wolf' perry, the most boring man alive... who also happens to have lived the most exciting life as the worlds top assassin, before becoming a professor as a cover to hide out while things cool down... (it's a long story, but hilarious)

I wish my econ class could be more exciting

[Sicill]

Granted. Your econ teacher now spontaneously combusts at random intervals and the tests have to be taken on a roller coaster.

I wish I had something healthy to eat between my calc 3 and micro 1 classes.

[Lysander]

Granted. You now have a massive supply of proverbs to mentally dine on.

I wish for a dream of the goddesses.