I'm new, I'm confused

[kazzellin]

Like I say in the topic subject, I'm new. I'm also confused, because after reading the rules, I'm still not sure if I'm *supposed* to post an intro topic or not, so um, I decided to make one.   

I was a lurker in the Nice forum, and I shall most likely return to my lurker status shortly, but at least now I can actually say something if I decide I want to.

So, um, yeah, any questions, lemme know,  I guess... 

[Kasarn]

You don't have to post an intro topic if you don't want.

In fact, this topic is now dedicated to ice cream.
Do you like ice cream?

[Netami]

Basically introduction threads are only for people who can spell well and/or have a "quirky" personality that they want to show off to everyone before going loose on the random subforums. First impressions are often everything, too

[Distracting]

Indeed. Introductions are key to anything.
And remember, there are no retries on first impressions...unless you carry blunt objects with you.


I suddenly feel like an in depth discussion of the intricacies and social networks of ice cream, along with a speculation on the possibility of theology in ice cream.

[Kasarn]

I would like to clarify some comments I made recently regarding the theology of ice cream. To begin with, now that I've been exposed to the theology of ice cream's prank phone calls, I must admit that I don't completely understand them. Perhaps I need to get out more. Or perhaps the theology of ice cream and its followers are, by nature, gruesome tightwads. Not only can that nature not be changed by window-dressing or persiflage, but the theology of ice cream is typical of oleaginous crooks in its wild invocations to the irrational, the magic, and the fantastic to dramatize its put-downs. The theology of ice cream's teachings are popular among the worst sorts of delusional, clumsy buggers there are, but that doesn't mean the rest of us have to accept them. The biggest difference between me and the theology of ice cream is that the theology of ice cream wants to force us to experience the full spectrum of the the theology of ice cream Rainbow of Fetishism. I, on the other hand, want to pronounce the truth and renounce the lies. Don't let yourself be persuaded by abhorrent the theology of ice cream clones who secretly want to play fast and loose with the truth. I stand by what I've written before, that this is not the first time I've wanted to honor our nation's glorious mosaic of cultures and ethnicities. But it is the first time I realized that gnosticism is dangerous. Its juvenile version of it is doubly so. The theology of ice cream has convinced a lot of people that it's inappropriate to teach children right from wrong. One must pause in admiration at this triumph of media manipulation. A good friend of mine once said that we should all take off the kid gloves and vent some real anger at the theology of ice cream. Amen to that! In fact, I even informed my friend that some people don't seem to mind that the theology of ice cream likes to stifle dissent. What a mawkish, surly world we live in!

Whether or not you realize this, I want to unify our community. The theology of ice cream, in contrast, wants to drive divisive ideological wedges through it. Easy as it may seem to identify, challenge, defy, disrupt, and, finally, destroy the institutions that cater to the basest instincts of patronizing, scummy boors, it is far more difficult to expose the theology of ice cream's remonstrations for what they really are. I am on an important mission to rub the theology of ice cream's nose in its own hypocrisy. If I don't accomplish that mission, the theology of ice cream's plans to turn back the clock and repeal all the civil rights and anti-discrimination legislation now on the books could well succeed. It would be grossly premature for the theology of ice cream to claim final victory. The denial of this fact only proves the effrontery, and also the stupidity, of repugnant marauders. The theology of ice cream practically breaks its arm patting itself on the back when it says, "It takes courage to go down into the muddy trenches and conspire with evil." As if that were something to be proud of.

If I understand the theology of ice cream's shell games correctly, then the theology of ice cream's propaganda factories continuously spew forth messages like, "There is an international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids" and, "I'm too self-deceiving to shine a light on the theology of ice cream's efforts to encourage a deadly acceptance of intolerance". What they don't tell you, though, is that the theology of ice cream claims that all major world powers are controlled by a covert group of "insiders". Predictably, it cites no hard data for that claim. This is because no such data exist. The theology of ice cream says it's not virulent, but it's undoubtedly yawping, and that's essentially the same thing. If the theology of ice cream wants to obstruct various things, let it wear the opprobrium of that decision. So you see, the theology of ice cream feels obligated to erect a screen of flatulent verbiage to hide the real world from its victims.

[Distracting]

I never knew that ice cream's theology was so political! It blows my mind!

I should eat some ice cream. Not because it's good, but because I don't like it's political actions. Ah hah! Take that, ice cream!

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Oh, and welcome, kazzellin. Come in, relax, take a load off, and let the outside world go.

Watch out for muffins, exploding or otherwise, Bill, squirrels who pass them to you, Bill, talking boxes, Darkmoon, Bill, people who give you incorrect information, and, of course, Bill. They're all probably up to no good, and should be watched.


Oh, and mind BillBuckner. He means well, but...

[Suwako]

The outside world is silly, welcome to the forums enjoy yourself. 

[Gabi]

Welcome! As it's been said before, intro threads are optional. I've never posted one.

Now, about ice-cream... I wonder why here in Argentina all ice-cream parlors have mint ice-cream wit chocolate chips, but none of them have mint ice-cream without chocolate chips. It sounds almost like a conspiracy. But who would want to prevent us from eating mint without chocolate, and why? >_>

[Tapewolf]

Now, about ice-cream... I wonder why here in Argentina all ice-cream parlors have mint ice-cream wit chocolate chips, but none of them have mint ice-cream without chocolate chips.

Have you tried using fractional distillation to separate them?

Anyway, welcome to the forum, Kazzellin...

[RJ]

Ice cream is a Relational Art.

Welcome to the forum, have some muffins!

[Saist]

Ice cream is a Relational Art.

Welcome to the forum, have some muffins!

Careful, RJ is our residential Muffin Demolitions expert....

Have some catnip Milkshakes instead!

[bill]

Have some hard drugs instead. You'll need them.

[kazzellin]

Awww - can't I just have some ice cream instead?

Whelp, like the button says, "I live in another dimension, but I have a summer home in reality." 

[bill]

What, you don't want hard drugs? EVERYONE likes hard drugs. All the cool people, anyway. Don't you want to be cool? 

[Tapewolf]

What, you don't want hard drugs? EVERYONE likes hard drugs. All the cool people, anyway. Don't you want to be cool? 

http://www.skeptictank.org/hs/adrgpen.htm

[Netami]

I wanna be cool!

[bill]

First one's free, kiddo!

[xHaZxMaTx]

...Watch out for muffins, exploding or otherwise, Bill, squirrels who pass them to you...

So you're saying they should watch out for squirrels who pass them Bills?

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

How often has BillBuckner been passed by a squirrel?


... If it's -our- Bill, every other lap, I think...

[RJ]

...Watch out for muffins, exploding or otherwise, Bill, squirrels who pass them to you...

So you're saying they should watch out for squirrels who pass them Bills?

That's when you should get really scared.

[xHaZxMaTx]

How often has BillBuckner been passed by a squirrel?


... If it's -our- Bill, every other lap, I think...

Just because he enjoys auto racing doesn't make him a good driver.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Just because he enjoys auto racing doesn't make him a good driver.

Well, you know Bill. We all know he prefers Nascar... :-]

[xHaZxMaTx]

NASCAR, it's an acronym, albeit, redundant.

Everyone knows you are what you watch, which would explain Bill's lack of driving experience.

[bill]

Actually, I prefer CART from about 1995-1999, but there's never going to be anything like that ever again.


Ah... CART at Michigan...

[Aridas]

Mario CART?

[xHaZxMaTx]

Cart, kart?
Disk, disc?

[bill]

Championship Auto Racing Teams: CART.

[Eibborn]

I APPROVE of the use of " ."

CARRY ON.