The eternal question that drives me...

[Destina Faroda]

This is a topic that's been eating at me for a while.

If you disagree with someone, that doesn't mean you dislike them, right?  Surely, you get along with people you disagree with.

Then who are the people you tend to hand around?  The people who have the same mindset as you.  The people that agree with you tend to be the people you prefer.  Likewise, the people who disagree with you tend to be people you dislike.  The less you agree on, the greater the antipathy.

Has anyone ever disliked anyone who always agreed with them?  Has anyone ever liked someone who always disagreed with them?

[insanekaosx]

There is no one I agree with on absolutely everything. And I have this nasty habit of liking some people, so it seems that I can still like someone I disagree with.

[Destina Faroda]

But do you agree with the people you like more than the people you dislike?

[xHaZxMaTx]

I try not to talk to the people I don't like, and there's very few of them, so I'm not sure what they think.

[Zina]

I don't know about everyone else, but I tend to hang around people who's company I enjoy, personality-wise. People that make me laugh and who I have a good time with. A lot of my friends like things I can't stand, and visa versa. My current roommate and I have very little we actually agree on, and we get on fine. But then, I have a very bizzare way of bonding with people, so.
And on the flip side, I've had several experiences where someone would agree with me on EVERYTHING and I couldn't stand them.
But that's just me.

[Miaka]

People who are enough like me to agreee with me on everything..... Are either loved or absolutely hated.

Though there are some people who agree with me on just about everything, I have some pretty weird views, so it's pretty hard to agree with everything I say.

And who I dislike is just based on... personality shit. I don't care if you agree with me on every single view I have  ever had ever, and you're a stupid, self-centered, arrogant jackass, you're still a stupid, self-centered, arrogant jackass.

[Sketchy boy]

I don't have lot of friends.  Im kinda anti-social.  That and sometimes ill get a speach impediment and ill studder and i can't really think of what im going to say to people.

On the disagreeing part, yeah, i disagree with alot of people.  I don't talk though if its none of my buisness.

Theres probably more then a few I dislike because iI have a talent of pointing out the real person cuase i listen to how they talk, there attitude, and I'll watch the way they walk and stand.

[insanekaosx]

Well, I tend to agree with people I like more on the sole fact that I don't relate with people I don't like often.

I don't like them for various reasons. Logical, illogical, rational, irrational....

[Eibborn]

This... is a tricky one to answer.
You can disagree with something a person does, and this often means that you dislike it. But disagreeing with a person does not mean that you dislike them.
FOR EXAMPLE, I'll use you. Some time ago, you made a thread that said something along the lines of the world being a better place without friendship. I don't recall exactly, so forgive me if I'm wrong.
So. I disagreed with you on that point, but it didn't make me dislike you. On the contrary, I'm the sort of person who is a sucker for relative debates, especially when they get philosophical. I appreciate the thoughts that you provoke when you post something like that (or this), so I actually like you better for it, even though we still disagree.

I feel obligated to add that you are right, in a way. You probably do disagree with something you don't like, if that's all it means to you. If it's something more complicated, however, then it's another story. Another comparison, you say? Well, okay. Like... hm. Tofu. You may like the taste of tofu fried with mushrooms and chicken, but hate the texture. Just because something disagrees with you, doesn't mean that it's bad all over.

...That one didn't make as much sense as I had hoped. OH WELL.

As for liking people who agree with you, or disliking those who don't... what matters more to me is sincerity. Or if not that, at least manners.


...I'm going to leave this, now. I think I'd probably write an essay if I didn't.

[Destina Faroda]

Well, these are good answers, and one thing I've learned is that while I can give a debate, sometimes regular discussion is just better.  I'll add my thoughts later, when I can collect them in a way that isn't as abrasive as I can sometimes be.

Thank you for your participation.

[Hilary]

I have friends who I would positively hate on paper, but I love being around them and talking to them.
Example: The way I met one of my best friends was that after school, he came up to me and asked if I had any rolling papers. Now, I don't hate people who smoke. However, it is something I disagree with. I said that no, I didn't have any, but somehow a conversation started. We've have been good friends ever since. We don't have much in common, but we enjoy talking to each other.
Strange? Yes. Uncommon? No. I understand that this one example doesn't prove anything on its own, but it is just one of many. One of my friends is against gay marriage, and I disagree. That doesn't make her any less my friend. Many of my friends hate anime and manga, but I don't hate them because of it, and I don't hang out with them any less.
Some people, though, form opinions based on first impressions and by listening to others. For some, it's hard to get past an initial dislike, maybe even formed before they have met the person in question. It often differs based on where a person is coming from and their own personality.

*cough* So that's my two cents.

Edit: That took a long time to write, so I'm posting it even thought the discussion seems closed.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

And who I dislike is just based on... personality shit. I don't care if you agree with me on every single view I have  ever had ever, and you're a stupid, self-centered, arrogant jackass, you're still a stupid, self-centered, arrogant jackass.

Aww, Miaka, you really think so? But i try so hard for you...


*giggle*

[Leafar]

i have a friend we fight almost everyday cause of music, games, movies...
he is my friend since i was 8...16 years of friendship...that tells everything huh?
BUT (jimmy's father says: NO BUTS YOUNG BUDDY lol kidding) in forums we usually find people that disagree with you, THEN create the barrier like i don't like you...only making things worse...but you can't think it's all the same...internet if filled with sickos you know...people that spend all day in front of the pc...that forget what is like the world out there...as far as makes me sad, that's the truth...so if your doubt is that, lose it....
friends on internet = a thing
frineds on real life = completely different thing

[Destina Faroda]

I understand what you mean, Leafar, but are you implying that people in the "real" world are not as likely to base friendships based on similar interests?  I have to disagree with that statement.  Most people associate with people who are like them.  That's an ingrained personal preference.

[Nikki]

i disagree with almost everyone...including Elies >>

Just beacuse you disagree with someone doesn't mena you dislike them...

[ITOS]

Look at it this way, you can agree with a thought even if you dislike it.

For instance, sacrificing one life in order to save many. Most would agree that it would be the right thing to do even if they'd like to save everyone.

So in this case agreement = dislike. If disagreement would = dislike, agreement would = disagreement. It stands clear that this can't be the case, we have to make a difference between disagreement and dislike.



At least I think...

[Nikki]

 

COFFEE!! *runs to the teacher's lounge*

[Destina Faroda]

Look at it this way, you can agree with a thought even if you dislike it.

For instance, sacrificing one life in order to save many. Most would agree that it would be the right thing to do even if they'd like to save everyone.

So in this case agreement = dislike. If disagreement would = dislike, agreement would = disagreement. It stands clear that this can't be the case, we have to make a difference between disagreement and dislike.

At least I think...

Yes, but dislike and like come in degrees, and I would argue that the number of things one disagrees with or agrees correlates directly with the amount of like and dislike.  For instance, that one instance may shift one's affinity for the people who agree toward them.  But the more issues that are raised, the less likely it becomes that someone will agree with all of them.

Also, the fact is that there are issues that are of differing importance to either or both parties.  I can say that I like the color lavender, where as another person may love azure.   However, that disagreement is minor because that issue is not usually of much importance.  On the other hand, if a person likes the same games, but thinks that women should be beaten and religious minorites lynched, then despite anything we have in common or even how well we got along, that sole disagreement will prevent me from ever seeing that person as a friend.

[Nikki]

can't we all just love eachother!?

[ITOS]

Then the dislike is a consequence of a disagreement, just like a cough is a consequence of a cold. Even if they influence each other they are not the same.

[Gabi]

Well, I like a lot of people, and I'd be surprised to see anyone more than once without having at least a slight disagreement. We're all different, thankfully, so no two people can agree on absolutely everything (just like no two people can disagree on absolutely everything). But if you accept that the other person has the right to have a different view on certain things, and the other person accepts that two, you can get on well.

There are some disagreements that are more serious than others. For example, if someone said they wanted to solve the world's hunger problem by killing all the hungry people, I wouldn't like that person. But more often than not the things on which I disagree with the people around me aren't that important.

As for what leads us to like a person... I think there are lots of factors. Personally, I like people who accept me as I am regardless of whether we think alike or differently; and I try to avoid people who pretend to idolize me (and that kind of people always seem to agree with the person they're sucking up to), because either they're not honest (and I value honesty) or worse, they don't even know how to think for themselves and be their own individuals.

So those are my thoughts, I do think liking and agreeing are separate, mostly independent things, unless ethical and moral values are involved in the disagreement.

[Destina Faroda]

and I try to avoid people who pretend to idolize me (and that kind of people always seem to agree with the person they're sucking up to), because either they're not honest (and I value honesty) or worse, they don't even know how to think for themselves and be their own individuals.

I guess I can never understand this as no one has ever idolized me.   I can't see what would be so bad about being on the receiving end of devotion, fidelity, and obedience.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

can't we all just love eachother!?

"Can't we all just get along?" :-)

[Zina]

I guess I can never understand this as no one has ever idolized me.   I can't see what would be so bad about being on the receiving end of devotion, fidelity, and obedience.

Because devotion, fidelity and obedience does not a worthwhile friendship make.
If you're not looking for something deeper out your relationship with some people, then yeah, it's just fine.

[King Of Hearts]

A good friend is someone who can smack you when you do something stupid.

While I disagree with "Opposites attract" A level of conflict makes for good camaraderrie.

[Amber Williams]

Darkmoon/Damaris and I disagree on a lot of things.  Mostly on who's turn it is to do dishes granted...but also important things.  But I lurve em dearly.

It all depends on what a person disagrees on.  There are a variety of subjects and each one has different measures of worth to a person.  Two people might be best friends while disagreeing on religion, while another person would be unable to maintain a friendship despite a disagreement of that nature.

Some might say that since I'm an artist, a good majority of my friends are fellow artists...but really when I sit down and weigh out various friendships...a good chunk of my friends have little to do with the art scene.  A couple even think what I draw is downright silly.

[Vidar]

A couple even think what I draw is downright silly.

You mean DMFA isn't meant to be silly?  D:
Now I must re-read the entire archive with a new perspective in order to find the true meaning of existance! Onward, to the old artwork! 

[Gabi]

I guess I can never understand this as no one has ever idolized me. I can't see what would be so bad about being on the receiving end of devotion, fidelity, and obedience.

I don't care for devotion and obedience. I prefer honesty and being treated as an equal. I like people who care for me and who allow me to care for them in the same way.

[Anara]

A good friend is someone who can smack you when you do something stupid.

I tend to get whacked a lot by my friends...  
When they aren't joining in with the stupidity that is...

I dissagree with a lot of my friends. As a matter of fact, one of my fav things to do is argue with them, as long as it doesn't get out of control and we can laugh about it later. Who was it that said "hell is being locked in a room with your friends"? Life would be terrible if you agreed with everyone 100% of the time. Dissagreement is part of how we interact with other people and it definately doesn't make you automatically dislike someone. It often makes friendships stronger.