[Story] The Future History of Jakob Pettersohn (11/Jul/09 - Final Chapter)

[Dannysaysnoo]

a small MP3 player that had already been obsolete when he bought it 150 years ago.

"Give or recieve an electric shock"?

[Ryan_Galen]

Let's try to make some better comments then last time. Shouldn't take too much effort since I've just read this one and last time I waited a few days before commenting.

Good lawyers indeed. Daryil tries to go for love, but ends up getting another lawyer instead. I wonder if he gets all his paralegals this way? More importantly, what is Daryil doing hitting on a random being when he is in a serious relationship? Or at least as serious as anything can get with Daryil. ...I just answered my own question, didn't I?

Seth killed his parents. Boy, Yak sure has a knack for drawing out the Cubi drama cases. Then again, it is probably the standard of the species, by fate or design. I think we'll require flashback popcorn next chapter.

And finally... another bread crumb to a future plotline? How many impending plotlines do we have now? One for the creature council visit, two for the dead general, three for the angle who is trying to get his (accessory) wings, and now Father Albina. Oh, and up the count to six since we have the overarching concern of robots with magical presets ruling the world and we're still in the middle of the a Dorcan related plotline with Seth here. Even if one and two are just begging to be braided together, that is a lot of plot threads Tape. At least for a story that develops on an installment basis like this one does.

And yes, the robots plot line was both serious and a joke at the same time. While I doubt they'll take over the world, all these robots who decide to stay robots will eventually start forming their own social norms within being society. Certainly not creature society, unless Fa'Lina decides she likes the idea of having an immortal source of dreams and emotions walking around the academy who she doesn't have to feed. Imagine what they could do for Professor Aaryanna's class... um, then again, don't.

Oh. New thought just popped into my brain. Have any of the robots experimented with gaming software yet? Not on their personal hard drives of course, but linking themselves up to an external system should be possible.  Of course, that would also require a whole new mode of thought for their minds, which means one person attempting it in a stubble around in the dark kind of way,  and then the rest of them sharing the presets.

Actually, would Josh as a secret agent have better trained reflexes then a Dorcan with his self defense training? It might be another explanation why the Doberman has better reflexes now since all the robots are using Josh's presets. In any case, in the long run video games might not pan out. Sure, their reflexes would be insane (eventually) but the UIs are just not built to be compatible with someone viewing the game inplace of their normal vision.

And... I better stop before I prater on more. Looking forward to the next installment Tape.

[Tapewolf]

Good lawyers indeed. Daryil tries to go for love, but ends up getting another lawyer instead. I wonder if he gets all his paralegals this way? More importantly, what is Daryil doing hitting on a random being when he is in a serious relationship? Or at least as serious as anything can get with Daryil. ...I just answered my own question, didn't I?

Yes.  Keaton brought this one up.  Basically, I'm taking the stance that 'Cubi are far more casual about sex than Beings, on account of their long lives.  That would imply that they are somewhat more flexible when it comes to what constitutes adultery.
At the end of the day I did that for amusement value more than an actual plot device.

As for the demon, it wasn't really my intention to make him one of Daryil's lawyers, though I suppose that might happen a few later if he turns out to be really good at it.

Seth killed his parents. Boy, Yak sure has a knack for drawing out the Cubi drama cases. Then again, it is probably the standard of the species, by fate or design. I think we'll require flashback popcorn next chapter.

It might not be nearly as exciting as you imagine, but yeah, we'll be going over that in the next chapter.

And finally... another bread crumb to a future plotline? How many impending plotlines do we have now? One for the creature council visit, two for the dead general, three for the angle who is trying to get his (accessory) wings, and now Father Albina. Oh, and up the count to six since we have the overarching concern of robots with magical presets ruling the world and we're still in the middle of the a Dorcan related plotline with Seth here. Even if one and two are just begging to be braided together, that is a lot of plot threads Tape. At least for a story that develops on an installment basis like this one does.

Actually, Father Albina leads to one of the above plotlines.  It's handy that you've listed them really, because I'm not nearly as organised with this as I should be...

And yes, the robots plot line was both serious and a joke at the same time. While I doubt they'll take over the world, all these robots who decide to stay robots will eventually start forming their own social norms within being society. Certainly not creature society, unless Fa'Lina decides she likes the idea of having an immortal source of dreams and emotions walking around the academy who she doesn't have to feed. Imagine what they could do for Professor Aaryanna's class... um, then again, don't.

As long as they are hires and not slaves...

Have any of the robots experimented with gaming software yet?

It's something I contemplated when designing the AI aircraft world.  It was a possibility, and it's something that the androids probably could do if they wanted.

[Gabi]

I will not comment on the cliffhangers because others already have and because I can't think of anything interesting that could be said about them.

I will, on the other hand, comment on Daryil: he doesn't cease to amaze me. He keeps doing heroic deeds while looking anything but heroic, and acting funny while scaring the hell out of everyone. That's hard to achieve. (And yes, I trust that he does have great lawyers. Otherwise just about the whole world would be after him by now.)

[Zedd]

Very nice Tape! Just keep up with what your doing best!

[Tapewolf]

Project Future still has a lot to do though I'm hoping it will be completed within the next 3 hours or so.  In the meantime, here's some Future History.

Chapter 37 - Stalemate

Jakob stared at Seth with penetrating eyes and a frosty voice.  "You killed your own parents?" he said.
"Was there any particular reason for that, or were you just feeling bored?"

"YES!  There was a reason!  They were soul-killers!  They... they killed my foster parents!"

Silence fell.

"That's not what you said before..." Dorcan pointed out quietly.

"I didn't want to talk about it!   No, they treated me unkindly,  and I didn't like them... but they... their souls were eaten!" Seth screamed.  "One each, as though they were dainties to be shared!  Have you ever seen that happen?  Someone you knew, destroyed for ever as though they had never existed at all?  No-one deserves that!"

"And after they... did it... they TRIED TO GET ME TO JOIN THEM!" he shrieked, and then curled up into a ball.  Jakob and the others watched in stunned silence.

"So I killed them," Seth continued, and his voice was drifty, but otherwise almost normal.  "It was easy.  Just a quick knife thrust into their hearts... They didn't expect it...  Didn't expect their own son to kill them.  They should have died harder, more slowly, but they still died and that's something to be proud of.   And then... then... I swore an oath that I would do the same to anyone else who ate souls."

Jakob touched the stricken wolf on the shoulder.  "In killing them, you may have saved your foster-parents," he said gently.  "There is a chance that their spirits, in whole or in part, were released by the deaths of their captors."

"Really?"  Seth raised his head and stared at the other incubus, wide-eyed, desperate to believe.

"It's possible," Jakob said, surreptitiously eating his misery and calming him.  "I hope, for their sakes, that it was so.  And now I have a question for you.  You are SAIA-educated, are you not?  How did that happen?  If your parents didn't sponsor you, who did?"

"No, they didn't," Seth said.  "My parents came to our city as rampaging monsters.  It was that day that my head-wings appeared.  Probably because of their attack, actually," he pondered.  "I was lauded as a hero for slaying them, and the fact that I was also a young monster was overlooked.  Indeed, the elders realised that if I could be kept on their side, I would make a powerful ally in defending the city.  And I did protect it for a while.
"Then one day, one of the elders, Mistress Tarkhara, took me aside and told me that she knew of a place where I could learn to use my full powers.  It turned out that she was a succubus herself, but disguised of course.  The elders had always known what I was, even from a cub, but it was her influence that prevented them from banishing me.  In any case, she sponsored my application to the Academy.  I vowed to return when I had learned my mastered my powers, but by the time I left the Academy, the city had been razed to the ground in my absence."

"Did your mentor escape?"

"I hope so.  Of course, she would have gone through a few changes of disguise by the time I was ready to leave, so I couldn't find out where she was when I returned.  In any case, there was no-one left to ask."

"I don't approve of murder," Jakob said.  "But, much as it pains me to say so, I think you may have been on the right track, regarding your relationship with your parents.
"And on a happier note, since you seem to be concerned about who owns your body, I'll sort out some kind of deeds for you both."

A short while later, there was a chiming sound from the nearest wall, which displayed the word "Martha".  Jakob clicked his fingers and the image of a mare appeared.

"I'm sorry, Sir.  Is this an inconvenient time?  I have one Deputy Commander Hanson on the line, asking for Kris Ausmann.  He claims to represent the Starfire Intelligence Agency."

"Indeed?  Put him through," Jakob replied, becoming an Arctic wolf again as he spoke.  The trenchcoat too paled and lost its lustre until it resembled a laboratory coat.  When she was sure that his transformation was complete, Martha nodded, punched a key and was replaced by the dour face of a clouded leopard.

"Ausmann speaking," Kris said.  "What can I do for you?"

"As you may be aware, the soul of our former Commander was found to be powering a desk-lamp in his office, after a cleaner noticed it remained lit while unplugged.  We believe this horrible act was perpetrated by his secretary, a succubus known as Keaton, of clan Jyraneth."

"That is horrible," Kris agreed.  "But why come to me?"

"We have obtained CCTV footage of the late Commander Ashford entering the headquarters of your organisation.  This took place after his death, and we are certain that it was actually Keaton in disguise.  However, neither he not she have been sighted since that day.  Do you know what happened to her?  She is extremely dangerous and may have killed and impersonated any member of your staff."

"She did impersonate Ashford," Kris admitted.  "She attempted to kill several of my allies, after which we managed to subdue her and  eventually negotiated a... truce, I suppose.  Since then she has been far less dangerous."

The feline looked pleased.  "My organisation wishes to question her.  Would you mind releasing her into our custody?"

Kris shook his head sadly.  "Unfortunately, she left two days ago.  She did not leave a forwarding address, though I can send you a copy of her note if you wish."

Hanson looked disappointed, and then surprised.  "That's unfortunate.... is... is that Agent Oswald with you?" he asked.

"Just Joshua now," the husky said.  "I'm through with this intelligence lark."

"I thought you were dead," Hanson admitted.  "There was a note to that effect... after that, nothing.  Keaton would appear to have erased all our records since assimilating the Commander, and your testimony would be very helpful in bridging those gaps."

"I want guarantees of safe conduct," Joshua said.  "Last time I went for a debriefing, Ashford tried to murder me.  The truth is, I was killed by the Nagristi clan.  Mr. Ausmann resurrected me, and the Commander..."

"...thought you were a human spy or something," the feline grinned.  "Have no fear.  We merely wish to investigate his murder.  Unless you are also responsible, you have nothing to fear."

"I can tell you what I know," Kris said.  "If you want to interview the pair of us, I'm sure we can book an appointment.  Subject to the same guarantees as Joshua, of course.  Some of my work is a little controversial."

"Excellent," Hanson replied.  "That is certainly acceptable.  I will get back to you or your secretary presently.  Thank you for your time, both of you."  He rung off.

"I wonder how he'll feel when he discovers I'm Johan Cross," Jakob said.

* * *

"Here you are," Jakob said, handing Sethir and Dorcan a pair of ornately-decorated papers.  The white wolf read it, read it again, and then erupted into a silly smile.  "Oh gods... oh gods... how can I ever thank you?" He said to Jakob, hugging the incubus and then running away with an exultant crowing sound like a rooster on amphetamines.

"What's got into him?" Ashley asked.  Dorcan's brow furrowed.

"I think you've given me the wrong one," he said.

"Did I?"  Jakob scanned through the page.  "I, Jakob Pettersohn, do hereby transfer ownership of the android frame serial da-da-da-da-da known as 'Seth' and all of my property that it does contain, to one Sethir Clandover, irrevocably and in perpetuity."

"I'm sorry.  Let me print it out again..." he was interrupted by Sethir, who had returned carrying an armful of paper, photocopies of the deed Jakob had given him.  He proudly distributed them - Dorcan and Jakob began to read it.
"Where's my room?" he burbled.  "I'm going to pin one of these on the door..."

The Doberman wasn't listening.  His eyes were wide with abject horror.

I, Jakob Pettersohn, do hereby transfer ownership of the android frame
serial number 810000007, known as 'Dorcan' and all of my property that it
does contain, to one Sethir Clandover, irrevocably and in perpetuity.

He fell to the floor and wept.  Jakob stared at the deed in sheer disbelief.  "Oh f***..." he said quietly, over and over again.  Sethir continued to dance manically around the room.

"May I have that back, please, Sethir?" he asked, with a calm he didn't really feel.  "I seem to have made a mistake."

"'Irrevocably!'" Sethir told him, almost crying with laughter.  "Who's the master now?" he nudged Dorcan, who was curling up into a foetal position.  Jakob stared at the paper intently, as if willing there to be some invalidating technical mistake in the wording.  But there was none.

"I'll kill you," Dorcan wept.

"I order you not to," Sethir crowed.  Dorcan's expression hardened suddenly.  He raised his head in an imperious manner and stared the wolf straight in the eye.

"I invoke my rights," he said.  "I claim ownership upon your soul."  Sethir stopped dancing and the photocopies fell to the floor in a haphazard pile.

"You... you wouldn't!" he whispered.

"I stole your soul," the doberman said, fiercely.  "It belongs to me now, by right of conquest."

"But Jakob transferred ownership of everything in this body to me!"

"All of my property," Jakob said apologetically.  "That does not include your soul as that was never mine to give away."

Sethir collapsed to the floor and began to cry.

"It's not fair," he sobbed.  "I only wanted to stop him from ordering me around!"

"Stalemate," Jakob murmured.

* * *

Ashley stood in the kitchen, fury slowly mounting as he surveyed the debris.  Little shreds of plastic and cardboard were strewn about the work surfaces.  He stopped to examine a larger fragment of the remains... it seemed at one time to have been a box of marshmallow shapes.  Probably several boxes.

"Kirian!" he yelled and ran out of the room.  As he left, one of the cupboards opened and Keaton climbed out, quickly shoving the remaining marshmallows into her mouth.

* * *

   
The lupine monk stared out across the valley, at the buildings of the city.  Many were new, though some dated back from the days of Page.  Some were of modern-looking design even though they were ancient, their appearances copied from the trips to Earth, or the office blocks in cities ancient even when Cross himself was born.
   
"Yes," he said, "This will be the perfect place for our Order to settle.  I'll take it."
   
"I'm sorry, Father?" the raccoon asked, his eyes blinking with incomprehension.
   
"The city of Ha'Khun.  I'll take it."
   
The raccoon boggled.  "Do you mean..."
   
"You needn't wrap it."
   
"But, Blessed Father!  Our city is not for sale!"
   
"Did I mention anything about purchasing it?"
   
"Oh my gods..." the guide whimpered as the monk removed his hood, to reveal a pair of bat-like headwings.

"Your death will be a mercy killing, my son," he said.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

As he left, one of the cupboards opened and Keaton climbed out, quickly shoving the remaining marshmallows into her mouth.

Bwahahahahaha! Rotfl. Seriously.

[James StarRunner]

As he left, one of the cupboards opened and Keaton climbed out, quickly shoving the remaining marshmallows into her mouth.

Bwahahahahaha! Rotfl. Seriously.

Oh! I totally misread that! I thought it was Kirian who climbed out. XD

[Gabi]

I find the phrase "the soul of our former Commander was found to be powering a desk-lamp in his office" oddly funny.

The ending of the chapter... not so funny.

Ah, James, if you're reading this, I've given your fluff a gift.

[Zedd]

Very amazing chapter

[techmaster-glitch]

The only thing I don't get is how the flying kadoodle did Jakob screw up like that? Seriously, how do you put "Dorcan" instead of "Seth"?

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Two identical contracts.

He basically made one contract for Seth, then copied it and changed the first reference to Dorcan, but failed to change the second one.

Ewps.

[Tapewolf]

The only thing I don't get is how the flying kadoodle did Jakob screw up like that? Seriously, how do you put "Dorcan" instead of "Seth"?

Cut and paste, without proof-reading.  He may have been distracted at a critical moment.
Incidentally, the idea for this came from a typo when I was writing the previous chapter.

[Tapewolf]

Chapter 38 - Disguises

Jakob stared down at Seth with a sombre expression.  "Well, Sethir.  What are we going to do with you?" he said.  The white wolf panicked, took a step backwards.  With that trench-coat and cane, and that supercilious smile gradually spreading across his lips, it was hard to doubt that this was Johan Cross.

"We'll need to find some kind of arrangement that suits all parties," he continued.

"And if we can't find a solution?"

"If all else fails there's always dissolution," Jakob said, "Though I doubt it will come to that.  It would be a waste, after all, of your fine body."  Seth cringed.  My parents...  I can't face my parents after what I did to them...

"But there are other, more subtle ways," the wolf continued smoothly.  "For example, Daryil can change the words on your precious deed by will alone.  Or he could make you forget that you ever had the deed in the first place.  We would only need to burn all your photocopies."

"That would take us back to square one," Seth said nervously.  Then: "You're just trying to scare me."

"So I am!"  Jakob sounded surprised.  "You must excuse me, it's a very bad habit.  Anyway, if I were in your position, I would grant Dorcan's body back to him.  In exchange, he renounces his right to your soul."

"But my oath..."

"To serve him?  Well, I'm afraid I find it difficult to trust someone who killed their own parents, so I think Dorcan is well within his rights to hold you to your oath.  I trust him to use it only in dire need.  Talking of which, why does it have such a hold over you?"

"It's part of me," Seth said.  His posture changed and became tall, erect, with a certain nobility to it.  "The only thing I can trust is myself.  When I take an oath I am making a promise to myself.  If I break faith with myself, what is left?"

"But what if you swore an oath to bring a murderer to justice and then found he was innocent?"  Jakob insisted.

"I swore an oath to serve justice," Seth said.  "That would take precedence."

"Just like the three laws of robotics," Niall murmured.  Seth looked most affronted.

"Sethir.  Will you grant Dorcan ownership of his body?"

The wolf hesitated, a calculating expression forming on his face.  "Not yet," he said.  "I want to think this through carefully before committing myself."  Dorcan's headwings drooped.

"Don't worry," Jakob told the Doberman.  "In the absolute worst case, we can always transfer your soul into a new body.  We could even sort the arms out."

"You needn't bother about those," Dorcan said.  "They've grown on me.  But thanks for the offer.  I'll keep it in mind in case he does flip out or something."

Seth looked troubled... he could see his bargaining power slipping away.

"As you wish," Jakob said.  "Anyway, I've had enough of this for one day.  If you need me, I'll be in the common room."

* * *

Jakob flicked through the channels on the common-room TV, a large projection unit that he had built with his own hands.  They were just on the edge of several satellite footprints, and while the signal had to be boosted considerably they had a very good choice of programming.

Just this once, Jakob thought, I want to be able to switch on the TV without seeing something Daryil has done plastered all over it.  He tuned into a game show, sat back and closed his eyes.

"What lake provided the setting for the film Born to be weird?" asked the presenter.

One of the contestants pressed a buzzer.

"Ike?"

"Lake Moresdon!"

"Correct!"

The little winner's jingle began to play.  There was some scattered applause, but most of the audience were silent.  The presenter seemed a little flustered.

Jakob sat up.  There was something very odd going on here.  The camera showed Ike, a red panda, grinning from ear to ear.  The other contestants had a mixture of confused and sullen expressions.  One of them glanced at the fire-fox with an expression of sheer hatred.
They switched camera.  Jakob stared.  Ike was at least 25 points ahead... his closest rival had 3 points in total.

"Uh... what is the-"

"Greyhound Canyon!"

Shows such as this always had wards and charms to prevent 'Cubi or other Creatures from being able to cheat, but it seemed someone had managed to do it anyway.

"Correct!" the presenter beamed.  The jingle started.  A moment later, one of the security guards had the musteloid in an arm lock and his companion was examining him closely.  He caught hold of the red panda's arm.

"What's this?" he demanded, pointing at something on the underside of Ike's wrist that the camera couldn't quite resolve.

"It's a tattoo," Ike replied instantly.

"My arse it's a tattoo!  You're an incubus, my lad."

"It's a fair cop," Ike said.  A pair of medium-grey wings sprouted from his back.  Then from his head.  Then from his waist.  The security guards froze and let go of the creature, leaping backwards as though he was radioactive.

"You!" exclaimed the presenter, an expression of horror upon his face.

"Correct!" Ike said.  The jingle began to play.

"Who founded the Subtle Paw?" the presenter asked, and then covered his mouth.  From the shocked expression on his face, he hadn't said it voluntarily.

"I DID!" Ike sang happily.  A moment later the picture broke up into MPEG artifacts.

* * *

There was a flash of black light.  Daryil stood there, looking slightly ruffled.  His tail was still striped red and brown.  Jakob glanced at him.

"Nice going, 'Ike'." he said.

Daryil fixed his protégé with an odd expression.  "With powers like these, I could conquer worlds," he said.  There was a strange gleam in his eye for a moment.  "Instead, I use them to fight crime, arrange flowers and cheat at game shows."

"I wouldn't dream of persuading you otherwise," Jakob said nervously.  "But please... show a little discretion.  Tri-Wings can die.  Most of the ones who ever have lived were killed or destroyed in the clan wars.  I wouldn't want that to happen to you."

Daryil looked pleasantly surprised.  "I'm touched," he said.  "Anyway, I tried.  It was only when they fingered me as an incubus that I decided to show them who was who.  I suppose it will come to me in time."

Jakob pondered this for a few moments.

"Lord Ike... uh, Daryil," he said finally, "May I ask a... personal question?"

"I can't stop you asking.  I might not answer, though."

"I might not like the answer, come to that.  Still... in all honesty... I would like to know what your links really are with the Subtle Paw."

"I created it," Daryil said.  "I thought you knew."

Jakob faltered.  "I... I thought that was just an idle boast.  Can you at least tell me why?  What was it all for?"

"I was bored," the fox replied.  "You remember when you lent me Illuminatus!?  I searched all of Furrae, and I couldn't find any evidence of a global conspiracy.  Yes, there were a few cack-handed wannabe schemers in the Creature Council, but they didn't really amount to much.  So I decided it was time to fill the gap.  We held a series of meetings to establish the best evil plan to conquer the world.  Then, when things started to get interesting, they kicked me out."

"Anything good on?"  Niall asked, striding into the room.

"Our glorious leader has made a wonderful impression of himself on TV again," Jakob said.  Daryil fixed his tail, bowed proudly to his audience and headed off down the corridor.

* * *

"Ah, Mr. Cross!  How are you doing?" said a cheerful voice.

Jakob turned around, stung.  "Who the f*** are you?  How did you get in here?"

"My name is Johns," said the raccoon.  "I'm from the National Sinister.  I'm here to carry out an audit to see how evil you are.  Just carry on and pretend I'm not there."

"The 'National What'?" Niall asked.

"It's a magazine dedicated to evil," Jakob sighed.  "I stopped reading it waaay back, but unfortunately I took out a 500-year subscription.  Part of the special offer, as was this whole audit nonsense.  At the time it seemed worth it.  Anyway," he added, turning back to the raccoon, "I haven't gone by Cross for many, many years.  How did you find me?"

"Through the Academy, of course," he said.  "We have a special agreement with them.  They like to know what their former students get up to."

"Very well," he said, in a resigned voice.  "Let's get this over with.  What do you want to know?  Anything you want to see particularly?"

"The kitchen, please."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Jakob said.  "Of course!  I didn't offer you anything to eat.  Are you hungry?  Come to that, do you eat...?" he asked.

"No, thanks.  I just want to inspect the kitchen as part of the audit."

"I beg your pardon?"

"But of course!  Three out of every four evil deeds are committed in the kitchen," the raccoon said, proudly.  Jakob just stared at him.

A few minutes later, Johns walked slowly up to one of the cupboards, as though he was listening for something.  Jakob watched him with blank incomprehension, until the raccoon suddenly opened the cupboard in a single, swift movement.  Keaton gave a cry of alarm and pulled the door tight shut before Jakob had quite registered what had happened.

"Harbouring a fugitive..." the raccoon beamed and ticked a few more boxes.

Keaton...? As Johns moved on to study the sink, Jakob opened the cupboard again.  It was empty.  I must have imagined it...


"Disappointingly clean," Johns said as he walked away from the lavatory.

"Let me guess," Jakob said in a dull voice.  "Evil people don't clean the bathroom?"

"Toilets are currently very popular for executions," Johns said.  "Extra humiliating for the victim, and less cleaning up to do afterwards as you can simply flush all the blood and wet bits away.  Though you have to have a good aim... if the bullet goes through the bowl it completely ruins the carpet."

"Who's this maniac?" Daryil asked, walking past.  "He sounds dangerously insane.  Why have you let him in?"

"This little prat is conducting a survey," Jakob told him.  "Tempting as it is to kick him out into the Arctic snow..."

"Oh my gods," the raccoon said, his jaw dropping.  "A Tri-wing!  A new Tri-wing!  I haven't seen one of those for centuries on end.  Did you do that?"

"Pretty much," Jakob said.  The raccoon ticked about five boxes, an expression of rapture on his face.  "How many souls did he take to transcend?"

"None," Daryil said.  "We've managed to devise a workable substitute."

Johns looked a little disappointed, and began to tick a couple of boxes.  "Then again," he added, "That does kind of upset the status quo."  His brow furrowed for a moment.  He erased a few markings and mumbled something like "...working to undermine the Creature Council..."

* * *

"We'll send you the official results in due course," the raccoon said, "But I'd say you're only scoring around 33%, I'm afraid.  You really should try harder.  If I may make a suggestion, you didn't even threaten me when I arrived unannounced in your inner sanctum."

Jakob's patience finally snapped and he grabbed the raccoon by the throat, lifting him off his feet.   "Yes, more like that," he gurgled.  Jakob relieved him of his pad and began to leaf through it with a wing-tentacle.

"You know what you could do with?" Niall offered.  "You should invest in a good mobile data capture solution.  Pencil and paper are so last century.  Still, at least you're using Optical Mark Recognition..."

"Do you know any good suppliers?" Johns asked, with some difficulty.

"If you can just hang in there for a moment, I can get you a couple of contacts."  Kirian circled him for a few moments and he disappeared.

"Don't you think you should let go of his neck?" Joshua asked, concerned.

"Not yet," Jakob said.  "He wanted to see some evil, so he can stay up there for a bit longer.  We want him to get his money's worth, don't we?"

"Honest dealings don't count as evil," Johns gasped.

The wolf ignored this and casually rubbed out 'Murdered 2-5 people within the last month'.  In its place, he ticked 'Assaulted the auditor' and 'Altered the results of the survey'.

"But doesn't he need to breathe, and stuff?" Joshua objected.

"Not really," Johns croaked.  "It is starting to hurt, though."

* * *

In the maximum-security penitentiary, tastefully built on the very outskirts of Thorsden, Salomere sat in a reasonably comfortable bed, reading a book about the life and death of Johan Cross.  It was something she had read years before, but now that she knew that the author of the book was in fact Cross himself, she took the opportunity of her incarceration to go over it with a fine-tooth comb.

On the floor, next to a box of three cream eggs which Dorcan had sent her, was a jigsaw puzzle she had made herself.  Sheets of plastic were easy to construct by magic, and then it had only been a matter of morphing a wing-tentacle and slicing one into irregular parts.

Simple magic like this was permitted as a perk since she had been a model prisoner, and the wards had been relaxed accordingly.  They could be reset in seconds, should she do something foolish.  Likewise, the walls and door were hardened and enchanted preventing her from digging or cutting her way out of the cell.  Or letting anyone else in.

There was a faint beep followed by a clunk as the door opened, and the guard stepped in.  He was the same guy who usually made the rounds at this time, but there was something odd about his manner.

"How are you doing, Salomere?" he asked.

"I'm fine, thanks.  What about you?  Do you have a cold, or something?  Your voice sounds a bit off."

Suddenly her eye caught something on his hand.  She froze.  It was the Rhu-Hahn clan mark.

"It's time we had a little talk," he said, and smiled unpleasantly.  The door slammed shut behind him.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

I love "Ike". "It's a fair cop, guv." just cracked me up.

I love Keaton in the cupboard.

Just "hang in there" for a few minutes... classic.


Had me rolling in the aisles, right up to what Salomere is getting into. I kinda like her, so I'm a bit worried what you have planned for her. :-/

[Tapewolf]

I love "Ike". "It's a fair cop, guv." just cracked me up.

Thanks.  I realised that I missed a trick with that, so I have expanded that scene slightly.  It might be worth re-reading.  Thanks for the typo correction, by the way.

I love Keaton in the cupboard.

I wasn't sure how to merge that in with the upcoming arc, but the Salomere business kind of spoils that too.  I think I've got the best compromise.

Had me rolling in the aisles, right up to what Salomere is getting into. I kinda like her, so I'm a bit worried what you have planned for her. :-/

I think she can take care of herself.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

I love "Ike". "It's a fair cop, guv." just cracked me up.

Thanks.  I realised that I missed a trick with that, so I have expanded that scene slightly.  It might be worth re-reading.  Thanks for the typo correction, by the way.

Welcome. And yes, the jingle is a nice touch. ;-]

I wasn't sure how to merge that in with the upcoming arc, but the Salomere business kind of spoils that too.  I think I've got the best compromise.

Mmm. I did wonder where the heck she went to, though. Although since she's back in her body, she can teleport herself again, I spose.

I think she can take care of herself.

You'd think so, but there's the limitations built into the cell that might be worrying; if I was the incoming Incubus, I'd have turned those back up to maximum before walking in. Or as I walked in.

Assuming they affect the occupant, and not visitors, of course.

In which case, she'd be rather more limited than usual.

If he's been sufficiently egotistical to not think he needs it, of course, she'll have a whole new jigsaw puzzle...

[Gabi]

Hmm... Is Daryil on every TV channel all the time?

[Tapewolf]

Hmm... Is Daryil on every TV channel all the time?

No, but somehow it often seems to coincide with the times Jakob is watching it.  Jakob also has a distinct tendency to prefer channels based in a particular part of Furrae, which happens to be the region Daryil takes an interest in as well.  Thinking about it, it's probably the country or state they lived in before moving to the Arctic circle - the one where they did all their R&D in the holiday resort.

[Zedd]

Sounds like a huge movement and I do hope Keats makes it out alright

[Slowtini]

Great work as usual, Tape.

[Yugo]

Well, after spending a good majority of the day reading through all of this from the beginning, I'm not really sure what to say outside of that it's awesome and I'd like to see more. I'll post something more coherent and useful when I can think of it. Although I didn't really have the cubi bug that a lot of people get from DMFA before, I certainly do now. 

[Tapewolf]

Well, after spending a good majority of the day reading through all of this from the beginning, I'm not really sure what to say outside of that it's awesome and I'd like to see more. I'll post something more coherent and useful when I can think of it. Although I didn't really have the cubi bug that a lot of people get from DMFA before, I certainly do now. 

Thanks!   As for the 'Cubi bug, they are perhaps overused, and most people (with the notable exception of Keaton) do seem to concentrate a bit too much on friendly or at least neutral 'cubi, but from a writing point of view they have tremendous scope.

[Yugo]

That's part of what I like about it so much. You really take the time to show every kind of Cubi, to the ruthless (Keaton, whom I love by the way Keats ) to the downright crazy (Dariyl). It's a very interesting cast of characters. I really can't wait for the next chapter.

[Sunblink]

(Keaton, whom I love by the way Keats )

Aw, thank you. <3

*vanishes into the mist~*

~Keaton the Black Jackal

[Brunhidden]

keaton likes being stalked, fun

[Tapewolf]

Chapter 39 - Disasters

"So," Salomere said, surreptitiously activating the voice recorder in the pocket of her blouse as the setter leered at her triumphantly.  "I take it Sandford is dead, then?"

"The Being?  Yes.  And before you die too, I want you to know that I also worked for Morgalen's Dream shack.  It was I who murdered the mayor's son.  I had hoped they would kill you outright for that, but it seems I will have to get my hands dirty after all.  What a nuisance!  Still, the bounty should be worth something."

"But why?  Who are you, anyway?  What have I ever done to you?"

The setter grinned.  "Yes, I suppose you deserve to know.  I am Salwin Rhu'Hahn, and you... you are a heretic!" he screeched.

"Your parents betrayed the greatest 'Cubi clan the world has ever known!  Your family broke faith with the Red Quee-eee!" he toppled as Salomere smashed a pot-plant into the back of his head with a wing-tentacle.  She relieved him of his baton and bound him with a thick nylon cord that she created from thin air.  As she did so, the Doberman noticed with mild surprise that Mr. Sandford had suddenly grown a pair of breasts.  A succubus, then, she thought.

Salomere now had a number of problems.  The first was that her assailant was liable to wake up unless she did something horribly permanent to her.  In which case, the other guards would react very badly the moment they saw the uniform on the corpse.

If she stayed put, the guards or the janitor would eventually find the real Sandford stuffed into a broom cupboard or something.  If that happened, Salwin would be toast, and Salomere might even be pardoned.  But she wasn't going to remain unconscious forever, and it was more likely that the guards would start looking for Sandford and in retracing his route, find 'him' in Salomere's cell with a bloodied head.  That would be very not good.

The other option was to escape.  This was not easy as the cell door required a matching iris print and a code number.  The Rhu'Hahn's iris might still match Sandford's, or it might not.  Either way she didn't have the code.  The only option left was the one she hadn't wanted to use.  Reluctantly the Doberman reached for the box of chocolate eggs.

Such an inventive child, she thought fondly, as she began to unwrap the silver paper.  Could any other of my progeny have come up with a plan as warped as this?

For a moment she dithered over how many eggs to use, before realising that Dorcan wouldn't have sent her anything too dangerous.  It would have to be all of them as she wouldn't get a second try.  Quickly, she ripped the back off the portable TV, a black-and-white unit with an old-fashioned CRT display.  Two wires came off the loudspeaker.  Sharpening her claws, she cut the wires off, stripped them and punched a hole into the sides of the eggs.  From there she carefully fed the wire into the delicious fondant centre, and took the 9kv line off the display tube.

With remarkable haste, Salomere moved the bed between her and the contraption she had made of the TV and the chocolate eggs.  Then she began to create a large, thick sheet of the toughest plastic she could make.  A wicked temptation crossed her mind for a moment, but she dismissed it and dragged the guard into her shelter as well.

She cast her mind back to the day the eggs had arrived, recalling vividly the expression of disgust on the duty guard's face when he had eaten one.  He'd been convinced they had gone off or something and almost threw them away until Salomere had persuaded him that they were some kind of 'Cubi delicacy.  Quietly she had wondered just how long it had taken Dorcan and the others to make them.

That's the thing about being a 'Cubi.  They always expect you to use magic.

Salomere plugged the extension lead into the wall, then into the power strip.  She was about to press the switch when she suddenly hesitated, and pushed it away from herself.

What are you doing, girl? she thought.  This is crazy!  If it doesn't kill you outright, it'll add 'criminal damage' and countless other crimes to your record.  Real crimes, not the stupid ones someone's made up.  It might even hurt someone else.  No, there has to be a better way.

At that moment, the guard leapt at her.  Salomere ducked, and pressed herself against the far wall.  Her opponent picked herself up and advanced upon the Doberman with murder on her mind.  "Now you die!" she yelled, and promptly trod on the power strip.

* * *

Reports are coming in of a disturbance in Thorsden, the presenter said.  The screen showed a squat, functional-looking building.  Smoke was rising from it and half of it had been flattened.

"DARYIL!  What have you done?!" Jakob whimpered.

"It wasn't me!"

...the notorious prisoners being kept there.  Salomere, 500, was being held for the suspected murder of Mayor Faldathan's son, a crime she has repeatedly denied all responsibility for.

"The eggs," Dorcan said.  If it was physically possible, he'd have turned pale.

"What eggs?"

"Daryil and I made them.  She asked for some kind of last resort in case one of her enemies breached the prison.  So we made... You know those chocolate eggs with the fondant centre?"

"Yes..." Jakob said.  He could guess that he wasn't going to like what he was about to hear.

"We sucked the fondant out and mixed it with plastic explosive.  The prison security was all wired up to detect magic.  Explosives went straight through."

"I see," Jakob said.  "You do realise that she seems to have blown the supporting structure out from under the prison?  It will be a miracle if she got out of that alive, let alone escapes being branded as a terrorist or something."

Dorcan's expression hardened.

"We'll have to send someone out there.  Seth and I are the obvious choice since we arrested her."

"Me," Daryil said eagerly.  "I'll storm the prison, overthrow it and declare it to be an independent republic."

"Like you did with the park when they banned you?" Jakob snarled, "No thanks."

"I gave it back!  I just had to have the proper authority to repeal the unjust laws.  Those ducks had a right to their bread!"

"You abolished the law of gravity," Jakob pointed out.  "They had to get a Fae in to sort that one out, and to this day the plants won't grow straight there.  No, this needs a more subtle approach."

"His mother just demolished half the prison with a handful of Easter eggs, and you want a subtle approach?"

"We'll need Daryil," Dorcan said.  "If she's still alive, we'll have to make some kind of cover.  Make people believe it's a gas-leak or something.  If she's dead..." he stared at Daryil, who nodded.


Seth was sitting forlorn in his room when the Doberman arrived.  He noticed with mild surprise that Dorcan was wearing Scruffs' leathers again, and his headwings were gone.
"Are you going somewhere?" he asked.

"Sethir," the pinscher began, "I'm afraid we have a job to do.  My mother is in trouble and we're going to rescue her."

"Are we?"

"Yes, we are.  I command it."  The wolf opened his mouth, but Dorcan waved him quiet and ploughed on.  "If we bring her back alive, I'll release you from your oath."

"...just in, the body of a canine succubus has been found in the wreckage," said the newscaster.  Dorcan sagged heavily against the wall.

* * *

Keaton sat in her favourite cupboard in the kitchens, busily playing Soul Eater III on her GamePuppy.  Despite the contempt and disdain she held for Beings, Keaton was forced to concede that when it came to entertainment, they really knew their shit.

F*** she thought... the low-battery indicator had appeared just as her incubus levelled up.  Saving the game, she shut it down and cautiously opened the cupboard.  No-one was around.

A few minutes later, she left the storeroom clutching her prize, a 6-pack of Alkaline cells.   Glancing down at the packaging she ran straight into one of the panthers.  Keaton froze for a moment, and then forced herself calm.  It wasn't Mac, it was one of the grunts.  Maybe she could brave this out.

The creature glowered at her with his red eyes, but said nothing.  His mind was shielded.  Nothing she couldn't break down of course, but the beast would probably kill her if she tried that and even if he didn't, Jakob would detect the sabotage.  She side-stepped out of the way.  With another baleful stare, the creature glanced at her and then padded off.

In a fit of panic, Keaton embraced the Darkness, becoming hard to see in the dimly-lit corridor.  I should really have done this in the first place, she thought, and silently made her way after the panther.  He hadn't sounded the alarm or anything, but if he was going to tattle to someone else, things could still get ugly.  She had to know and there was still time to stop him...

For a moment she feared the worst as two other panthers came towards them in the opposite direction.  But then they turned off.  'Her' panther followed them.  Poking her head just inside the room, she caught a glimpse of at least a dozen panthers, maybe more.  They were all stood in rows and in front of them, another panther was sitting down, waiting for the stragglers to finish arriving.  She recognised the insignia on his foreleg.

Oh shit, it's a rebellion! she thought.

"Thank you very much for coming," Wils began.  "Now we are all here, it is time to begin."  Mac stepped in front of him, bearing a long, black ghetto-blaster in his jaws, which he deposited in front of their leader.  Wils' paw came down upon it.

Keaton's jaw fell.  All at once, the panthers burst into a frenzy of activity, organizing themselves into lines and rings and then turning on the spot, a breathtaking display of synchronized dance all in perfect time to the music.

It looked like her chance.  Keaton slipped off, still enshrouded in the Darkness.  Then she suddenly froze as the voice called out to her.  "I can seeeee yoouuuu...." it said.

* * *

Salomere staggered from the rubble.  There was a huge gash across her forehead and a ringing in her ears, but apart from that she seemed to have come away quite lightly.  Whatever had been in the eggs was considerably more potent than the explosives she'd used in her stint in a demolitions team some 50 years ago.  Worse, her cell door had been built against one of the load-bearing walls of the complex.

Her head was spinning.  Unable to remain upright she flopped onto the ground and began to concentrate.  As the dizziness receded, she picked herself up and crawled towards the still-standing offices of the prison.

Suddenly a uniformed figure stepped out into the corridor, blocking her way.

"Dorcan?" she croaked.  The figure raised his hand and aimed it at her, a fireball spell at the ready.  He looked a bit like Dorcan except for the horns.  And no headwings.  "Salomere," the demon said.  "You're coming with me."

"I can explain," she protested.  "It wasn't me!  I have proof..." she felt into her pocket.  The recorder had been crushed.

[Zedd]

Something musta spooked Keats good

[Tapewolf]

Something musta spooked Keats good

If someone taunted you while you were invisible, you'd be a little spooked too...

[Zedd]

Something musta spooked Keats good

If someone taunted you while you were invisible, you'd be a little spooked too...

I would too,The invisible annoy me