Corrupt A Wish Revived

[Rakala]

You all know the rules by now.

I wish my acne would clear up.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Your faced gets sandblasted off, and the thread dies a long, slow, painful death.


I wish I had more time in the day to get things done.

[Stygian]

Granted. You're fired.

I wish that I could get this smell of gasoline on me out.

[Jairus]

Granted. *sets Stygian on fire*

I wish I could lose some weight.

[VSMIT]

Granted, your internal organs disappear.

I wish I made more money.

[Jairus]

Granted. *airdrops twenty tons of quarters onto VSMIT*

I wish that Britney Spears would go away and leave us alone.

[VSMIT]

Granted, but now you've got Paris Hilton to bother you.

I wish I was both famous, and not famous, at the same time.

[Jairus]

Granted. You do something really stupid that kills you and earns you a Darwin Award. Congratulations for removing yourself from the gene pool.

I wish for a house designed by M.C. Escher.

[Stygian]

Granted. Good luck on finding your way out.

I wish I had a house designed by H.P. Lovecraft.

[VSMIT]

Granted.  You now have a house in R'lyeh, and Cthulu's watching your every move.

I wish I had a house designed by J.R.R. Tolkien.

[Jairus]

Granted. You will bash your head against those low Hobbit ceilings for the rest of your life.

I wish I had a can of Diet Coke.

[Mao]

Granted.  Just watch out for that Mentos I put in it...

I wish I had some cheese.

[VSMIT]

Granted.  It's old.  And stale.  And covered in green fuzz.

I wish I had a house in a clearing in the middle of a forest, where I could go to relax, away from those pesky things called "humans."

[Jairus]

Granted. Say hello to the starving bears and wolves for me.

I wish I had Buster the Mythbuster's Crash Test Dummy.

[Rakala]

Granted. The Mythbusters also come to live with you and end up blowing up your house.

I wish there were more episodes to Red Vs Blue.

[Slowtini]

Granted, but they all center around discussions of shakespeare.

I wish my wish couldn't be corrupted in some horrible way.

[Jairus]

Granted. However, since you didn't wish for anything of physical value, you also don't get to tangibly enjoy it.

I wish I had a copy of ET for the Atari.

[Slowtini]

Granted, but your atari gets stolen.

I wish goggles would speak in an Australian accent.

[Jairus]

Granted. Oy, this freak o' science is a roight little bugga, ain't ee? I'll ave to tackle 'im to tape him up so we can get him back to the woild! Wotcha!

I wish I had a copy of this game.

[Slowtini]

Granted, but the disk is unreadable.

I wish for fish.

[Jairus]

Granted. The next time you go to a swimming pool or lake, the entire body of water will be filled with fish.

I wish that they hadn't canceled Firefly. (I am morbidly curious as to what you're going to do).

[Slowtini]

Granted, but all the actors are replaced by Leonardo DiCaprio.

I wish I didn't just do that
<3 firefly

[Jairus]

Granted. All of the original actors are back on Firefly, but all of the Leonardo DiCaprio's are now walking around New York City naked.

I wish I had one of the Doctor's sonic screwdrivers.

[Slowtini]

Granted, but it's broken.

I wish I had a holodeck.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Instead, you replaced the characters with Kate Winslett.

Granted. You can't see it, though.

I wish I could go home now.

[Slowtini]

Granted. You live in a box.

I wish I had Telekinesis.

[Jairus]

Granted. The first time you try to use it, a rock flies up and knocks out three of your teeth and you spend a week in the hospital.

I wish I had Granny Weatherwax visit me.

[Rakala]

Granted. She ends up hating you.

I wish Red Dwarf wasn't canceled. (Kudos to anybody who knows why it was..... or knows what Red Dwarf was.)

[Jairus]

Granted. The fanbase declares that the show is completely different from what Red Dwarf was before it was canceled, scream "Ruined Forever!", and then watch it anyway to bitch and moan about all of the changes. Any new fans are chased off, and eventually the fandom falls apart.

(For the record, I think Granny hates everyone)

I wish the third season of Star Trek hadn't sucked.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Seasons one and two sucked so hard, the entire series was cancelled.


I wish for a fishy in a dishy.