Corrupt a Wish

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, however instead of platinum you only have mines filled with lead and mercury, and as I'm sure you are no expert on metalergy, it takes you the next 50 years to figure out how to turn lead into gold...shh it's a secret.


I wish to be warm and toasty, it's  72degrees  outside and I'm freezing.

[Joat]

Granted. Have fun on Venus!

I wish for really good music.

[Angel]

Granted. Sadly, in order to get REALLY good music, you had to sell your soul. Way to freakin' go.   

I wish I had some chocolate torte. Mmmmm... torte....

[GabrielsThoughts]

Due to my innability to translate the word torte you are granted a bearclaw...covered in glazed hunny with salmon flavored goo stuck to the furr which is attatched to an authentic bear. Enjoy your continental breakfast, courtesy of corrupt a wish!

I wish that I wasn't attracted to chaos.

[Joat]

Granted. As far as I’m concerned, that is such a horrible fate that it needs no horrible twist. I mean, non-chaos is BORING!

I wish for more chaos.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, you now live in Las Vegas where the chaos is ever present...and you owe billions of dollars in loans  to the local title loan companies which even worse than the sharks.


I wish I didn't have such a slow dial-up connection to the internet.

[Joat]

Granted. Now you have no connection to the internet.

“...Booored...So boooored....Ooh! Lint!”



I wish for a decorational sword.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. It's painted on. Yes, it's -that- sharp.


I wish I.. uh.. ... could remember what I was going to wish for.

[Stygian]

Granted. And it scares you. It scares you so horribly. You really didn't think you were capable of such thoughts... You're going to have to see a shrink. Right now.

I wish that some people didn't leave such shiny, big buttons for me to push. Make of that what you wish.

[Joat]

Granted. You are in my lab. There are many big, shiny buttons, but none of them are for you to push, as I specifically tell you. In fact, that one you just pushed against my orders was… aw crud.

*The universe explodes*



I wish for the ultimate gift.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. It is, ultimately, disappointing. And totally frivolous.

I wish I had more time in the day.

[GabrielsThoughts]

Granted, however you are now Danielle Ti'fiona and one of the side effects of Abel's magic is you are now more attractive than ever to fleas, you have so many flea's you are now tempted to scratch in places that are part of the Anti-hotness that is your sister.

I wish for the fleas to attack the next 3 posters.

[e_voyager]

granted but being robotic i am immune and do you ore desire to corrupt my wish you receive the worst flea attack in history s the flea (from mucha lucha) luchas you for donuts!.

i wish i was a spell checking program that was good in all languages.

[Joat]

I will assume you meant “had”, not “was”

Granted. Heh. In a few years, when I establish my business, I might actually make something like that. The corruption? It’s not exactly going to be freeware.

Much better than the less creative thing I had in mind (turning you into the said software).

I wish for faster programming abilities.

[Angel]

Granted. Your new programming speed makes you go mad with programming power, and because you start so many new projects you get the worst carpal tunnel syndrome in the history of computer geeks.

(thinks, and then breaks into an evil grin) Oh, this is so sweet. I dare someone to corrupt THIS wish.

I wish.... that PARIS HILTON WAS DEAD IN THE MOST VIOLENT WAY IMAGINABLE!

 

[Joat]

Granted. She goes to your school and dies in a shooting that takes place there. Oh, and so do you.

I wish for people to stop being so childish.

[e_voyager]

granted but you are reduced the the age you believe they are behaving at.

i wish i could visits Xanth as there is some one there i have never met but miss.

[GabrielsThoughts]

your wish is granted, however you are corrupted in Xanth by a man in a funny little hat.

I wish for the brain of a mummy. without getting the mummy's curse and without the swaping of my brain.

[Joat]

Granted. Here ya go. I hand you a mummy’s brain…

…And a whole lotta “where’s my mummy” jokes.



I wish for a laboratory.

[Drake Manaweilder]

Granted, but you have a moron for an assistant who ruins every experiment you try.

I wish we (students) didn't have homework.

[e_voyager]

granted but now wii (student's) don't learn anything useful and fail at life.

i wish i  had controls to adjust my epu output

[Drake Manaweilder]

Granted, but it's in a place you can't reach no matter how hard you try, and it's stuck on max, meaning you- no, no, I'll stay away from that joke.

I wish i had a Nintendo Wii with Ledegend of Zelda: Twilight Princess. (just in case, get yer' mind out of the gutter)

[e_voyager]

Granted and after many hours of solid game play you reach the finals boss just as you engage in battle your motion activate controls breaks and you are promptly defeated never to reach that point in the game again.
(also do not underestimate a on bot army that is rebuildable)


I wish that i had the parts to build the e copy system 2 so i cons play all these games... well maybe not wii games on my own system.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted. however, since I don't understand the wish it is corrupted horribly.


I wish Mumford's psychiatric patient would quit designing femmebots for Dr. Evil

[Stygian]

Granted. Congratulations; he now does perverted little bishyboi bots instead. And they run amok! Agh! Save us!

I wish that I didn't have so bleeding much to do all the time!

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. You're now locked in a very little box with nothing to do at any time.


I wish I wasn't quite so drunk.

[xHaZxMaTx]

Granted, you're now only slightly less drunk, but still too much to get that bottle of Gatorade to stop singing.

I wish I didn't have finals next week.

[GabrielsThoughts]

Granted, like me you had all your finals this week.


I wish I could smash a pumpkin with a thimble.

I wish I owned the pencil that produces pennies from the lost room.

[Zedd]

Granted But sadly...You break thumb in two places, And suddenly you get you revenge yet you have a few co workers of yours very upset...


I wish I that song Opblaaskrokodil (Or french erotic film to others ) would stop playing in my head eatch day when I am in the tub...Damn scottish sounding dutch peoples...

[e_voyager]

granted but that is because you now have other thing on you mind instead of that song when you are in the tub. namely when did you grow two extra hands, what are they doing and why are the cols as death?

i wish wily would stop tampers with me every time i visit him , forte an the others. i'm tired of my Epu's evil  being over clocked. it was almost easier when he would simply try to destroy me.