I can haz tumor?

[Brunhidden]

iz okay, it benign



seriously, i went into the doctor due to having a mysterious shortness of breath and i nearly had a heart attack as in rapid succession i was told insurance no longer covered me, i had a palpable tumor on my left arm after the doctor fondled my rippling muscles, and i needed chest X-rays immediately.

after a few hours i could almost breathe easily- my insurance was still in order, the tumor is benign despite having the potential to become cancerous and require a chunk of my bicep being sliced off, and something that looked like a broken rib on the X-rays turned out to be... something else i guess, they didn't tell me what.


yeah, i should stop posting every time i have a medical scare like having half my teeth ripped out, a new baby, or possibly life threatening condition. or at least also include good things in my life more. but the next good thing scheduled is when i find out how i can afford a gun so i can get a six dollar raise, and my daughter being on a DVD sometime soon. if anyone knows where i can get a double action revolver cheap let me know, i promise not to put the barrel in my mouth. 

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

I can list a few places where you might find an _illegal_ one, but that's not what you're after... :-/

Also, bear in mind you probably need to buy ammo for it, and at least practice enough that you can hit the side of a barn - and not hit the person standing next to the one you want.

Oh, and somewhere safe from your bairns to store it. Given your daughter, that's probably more important than you think. ;-]

[Jairus]

Two separate strong boxes, each with locks, one for ammo and one for the gun: keep the two separate. And possibly a trigger lock on the gun as well for extra protection. And store them both on the top shelf of a closet, out of reach. The keys stay either with you or in a place only you or your wife get to. I'd even say a safe of some kind, but that might be out of your price range. I wonder if you can visit gun ranges and try out guns to see which kind you prefer before you buy them. I'm not really sure if you can, since I've never been to one before, but it would be a good idea to see if you can at least practice at one while you're saving up to buy one.

As for the tumor... well, geez, at least it's benign and (relatively) easily taken care of. And things seem to be a little better for you, so keep going, and good luck, brun!

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

I believe conventional advice also includes keeping the bolt separate from the gun itself - this might be less useful on a revolver, though... ;-]

[Sprocketsdance]

Doctors are pretty darn keen on fondling.. *eyes Basilisk suspiciously* Hopefully there won't be any more tumors.. at least any malignant ones.

If so.. just make sure you choose a hot doctor, then maybe it won't be so bad (female perhaps? rawr).

You sure are a tough one! =) Just keep your chin up. 

[Brunhidden]

Doctors are pretty darn keen on fondling.. *eyes Basilisk suspiciously* Hopefully there won't be any more tumors.. at least any malignant ones.

If so.. just make sure you choose a hot doctor, then maybe it won't be so bad (female perhaps? rawr).

its a dude, who is about four times my weight, twice my width, and has a hand like a bunch of bananas

there are those who would find him hot, probably, but im not one of them

[Sprocketsdance]

Wow.. again I repeat.. you are a TOUGH one! >_< *shudders*

[Lysander]

Well it's good to know you're doing ok considering what could have been.   

And doctors really do like fondling. I went to a doctor after rolling in a car just in case, and out of nowhere she asked me how recently I had a physical and took it from there.

[Gabi]

My parents are doctors. Believe me, there are lots of things they enjoy more than touching protuberances that come out of people's flesh. But getting a feel of them is necessary in order to figure out what they're made of, and thus whether they're dangerous or not.

Also, 'tumor' is the medical word for 'blob', so as long as it's not cancer and it's not on a very delicate area, you shouldn't worry too much. Let them take it out and it won't bother you anymore.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Let them take it out and it won't bother you anymore.

... or them.

[Brunhidden]

Let them take it out and it won't bother you anymore.

... or them.

insurance will only pay to take it out if its malign, so i have to live with it and constantly check to see if it gets bigger



on another note after i had blood drawn they called me back saying they needed more because the first batch was too chunky. they also didnt tell me i needed an EKG, which required shaving a patch on my chest...

hopefully its over now

[Cogidubnus]

Regarding your health, Brun, I'm not sure if you made your CON a dump stat or not. Either you did and you're paying for it now, or you -didn't-, and you're extremely lucky (in both the good and bad way).
Jokes aside, I'm sorry to hear all that. >: - And your insurance sounds like a bunch of right bastards.

As far as a gun, I don't know what state you live in, but here in Texas you can buy handguns / rifles from pawnshops - you might try them. If I'm getting you right, you're not looking for a quality piece of machinery so much as a shiny piece of metal that gets you a pay raise, and you may be able to find one on the cheap there.
Somewhat paradoxically, rifles are cheaper than handguns, but I seriously doubt your company will let you carry a twelve gauge around with you.

[Brunhidden]

actually my dump stat is DEX

i live in Wisconsin, pawn shops are rare but i have found used guns in some sporting goods stores. for something that meets the requirements of my job would cost somewhere in the range of five hundred dollars minimum for a gun that is not swallowed by my palm.

sure i want it for a pay raise, but i also want it to save my bacon if someone starts taking potshots at my fat ass. there has been talk of giving me a shotgun if we get a contract for witness protection... i am intimidated by the responsibilities my boss thinks im qualified for

[Sprocketsdance]

Of course he thinks you're qualified... no one's going to be taking pot shots at his fat ass XD

Really though.. that sounds scary >_<. I would think the company would supply you with protection on the job for pete sake.