Interesting Gaming Stories

[Rakala]

So, it's apparent we have a few people who are gamers here, so I was thinking why not share amusing stories? And by this I mean tabletop rpgs, board games, card games, the only thing not allowed is video games.

One of my funniest moments in gaming was while playing a game called Strange Synergy. Basically you assign all your characters different powers, some are hidden, some are instantly revealed, and all do different things. My opponent had a hidden power called "Thief" while one of my characters had the power of "Two Heads". We hadn't read the rules correctly, Thief was only supposed to steal objects. Well he took my second head and placed it on his shoulders. It was quite baffling. We later realized we had broken the rules but I will never get the image of a big tiger-man taking a head off of Igor and using it himself. It was quite amusing.

[Ryudo Lee]

We did discuss this before... I think I had started the thread, but I could be wrong on that.

Here's one I found while looking for that thread.

We were playing D&D and we had gotten some Taco Bell.  Well, in this particular group, we had a Fist of Raziel, and some stuff was going down with one of the other players and that particular Fist of Raziel was trying his damnest to get Raziel to intervene.  Well, during his commune, he looks over at one of us and asks for a taco.  Someone else caught it and in a loud booming voice (to imitate Raziel) he said "WHAT IS A TACO?"  Ah, good times.

EDIT: Found a couple more for ya...

Chuck was a life-sized pewter skull that someone had brought to a gaming session one day (as a phys-rep) and somehow convinced the DM to let him put it in his inventory.  He wanted his character to think that Chuck talked to him, which was the whole point of having Chuck.  Well that PC died during the game, and being the good friends that we are, we looted his body.  Much confusion was had over who got Chuck and by the next few sessions, everyone had Chuck listed in their inventory, even that same player who had created a new character.  The DM finally got fed up and did an eenie-meenie-miney-moe to figure out who was actually carrying Chuck.  I forget who ended up with it, but more arguments arose over who should carry Chuck, and the DM got fed up again and, figuratively, chucked Chuck.

There was one player in our group who was... well... let me put it this way... he spent some time in Germany and swore that he saw zombies.  So he's not the brightest person.  But he played a sorcerer really really well.  We were playing a game that was putting the party through the various levels of the underhell, so we were going through a lot of battles, and especially dungeons.  Unfortunately, we already had a sorc in the party, and we needed a rogue.  He protested, saying that he didn't know how to play a rogue, but we promised to help him along.  Well, as the game progressed, the character became more and more paranoid as the player still didn't know how to properly play the character.  He considered a rogue as someone who was always looking over his shoulder and everyone is out to get him.  As the group passed through a dead forest, he looked up and said "I'm stabbing the trees!"  When asked why he was doing that, he replied "They might be enemies in disguise!"  He's no longer allowed to play a rogue.

My group has considered using catapaults in massive combats, not to launch boulders, but combatants.  At the time, I was playing my gnoll barbarian, and I had with me some NPC gnolls.  The plan was to load the gnolls in the catapaults and cast featherfall on them and then launch them into the middle of the oncoming army.  Consider that my character was a combat machine, being decked out with a huge warhammer, rage, frenzy, cleave, great cleave, and supreme cleave.

It was vetoed.

Plan B was to launch a bunch of Daraen's(sp?) Fortresses (the ones that shrink down to a cube and then when invoked become a large fortress) at the army and have them on a timed invokation so that they'll expand into full fortresses in mid air.

That too was vetoed.

Our DM's are no fun.

EDIT 2: Another one... I think we didn't make a thread about this before... I think...

My group is currently playing a large scale D&D campaign, one which we are creating ourselves.  Needless to say, we've had to scrap everything and start all over a few times.  We're on the third run.  I play the barbarian of the group.  Another of the group, during an earlier incarnation of the game, played a psion.  He had one of those focus stones that are supposed to just float around a psion's head, but he convinced the DM to make it sentient and amorphous... and pink.  Can you guess where this is going?  He decided to style this thing after Deebs.  We just ran with it because it was quite amusing.  The funny part is, during some of the more important conversations in the game, my character and Deebs would quickly get bored, and start goofing off.  My character would try to chew her like gum, she'd chase him with a mallet, he'd chase her with his axe, she'd come back rolling a cannon, etc etc.  This went on during just about every conversation.  We'd eventually get yelled at and told to sit and behave ourselves.  Which we did, but not for very long.  We kept the party amused for quite some time.

[Lisky]

I was banned from DMing a few months ago when i created a race of goomba like creatures.  They wore WW1 style german helmets, with the spike... one would bite the ankle of an adventurer, and upon failing their saving throw, they would fall, and become impaled on a group of the monsters... suffice to say, the entire group ended up being captured, and carted off by the buggers... good times were had by me 

[Tipod]

Back when I was in middle school, I'd play Pit with my dad and brother. For those who don't know, Pit's basically a commodity exchange game in card form, where you blindly trade one to four cards of the same type with the other players. Once you've got nine of one commodity, you ring a little bell and win the round.

Well, my dad thought that was pretty boring, so he substituted the bell a large brass cymbal and put it on the other side of the room. Cue my brother and I tripping and tackling each other whenever we got nine commodities. Good times

[lucas marcone]

i have two characters in D&D and both without fail have made themselves memorable in less than two campaigns a piece

first up is my gnoll fighter. my DMs like to play with weaknesses/ to elaborate this isnt just "oh you get a -2 to this and that" it's massive character flaws, and it's hilarious. knowing this in an attemp to keep them from giving him something horrible i gave him a weakness when i made him, and it was worse than anything the could have come up with short of mutilation. i gave him nontermanal rabies, ever round or so i have to roll sanity checks, 1-5 he's batshit nuts 6-14 is normal 15-20 he's "enlightened" (the dm made the table for roll results. well one day he happens to be in a tavern and the dm has me roll, i get a 20, so he says i am more lucid than anyone.....ever. so i have him writing poetry and stories, CAUSE HE CAN. next roll another 20, he bequithes unto my gnoll the knowledge of his "dm avatar" waldo. another roll and i get another 20. by this time another player is getting fed up with my sting of luck and makes it his mission to ruin it, but my gnoll makes him look like a fool and takes 3 lovely ladies upstairs to do the nasty. after thats said and done he wanders back downstairs for more booze, another sanity check of 20 and i find a "waldo doll" and it's missing something. upon further inspection it's missing the pom pom from its hat. some time looking for it and im prompted for sanity, i roll a 1. "you do not remember what your doing or anything about waldo. you do however remember that you were having sex in your room and you were looking for pom pom." my gnoll gets back to the room "and youve checked out and dont know it yet." opens the door and a man and woman are bumpin uglies. she ran who knows where......and my gnoll wanted pom pom. well needless to say it got very uncomfortable for both the guys at the table and the man in game. funny part was he broke grapple and after my gnoll chased him down and got back to business.....he did damage.


my satyr bard was another fun albeit short one. in the begining of the campaign my satyr was "bardifying" a stage in a tavern and tony's character a gnome ish bard decided he wanted to one up me. he rolled a 2. he broke every string but the 'd' string. i then rolled a 19 i hammered my solo so epicly that i finnished it with the correct note on his d string. later we were facing 2 were wolves and my satyr knew summon instrament and he summoned a giant bell and trapped one of the wolves inside it. we then preceded to kill it by over loading it's ears by slamming the bell.


sorry if my post seems like its a ramble with bad grammar but it's late and im tired.

[VSMIT]

Playing Munchkin with a few friends (for those of you who don't know what it is, go here, or read an explanation below), a couple of players had gotten above level 10, so we were playing Epic rules.

Somewhat boring explanation of Munchkin ahead, skip if you went to the site.  Players start at level one and each get two Door cards and two Treasure cards.  If they get a race card, they can play it.  If they get any equipment, they can play it.  Any monsters are held, waiting to be unleashed on an unsuspecting player.  Monster strength is determined by their level+item modifiers.  Standard levels are 1-20, but with the right modifiers, they can go quite a bit higher than that.  If the player's level+equipment/item modifiers is higher than that of the Monster, they win and receive however many treasure cards is listed on the monster card (1-4).  If the level is lower, they can run, rolling 1d6 to see if they're successful.  If successful, they get away without any good or bad consequences.  If not, the "Bad Things" listed on the monster happen.  If your level is too low, you can ask another player to help, and they can either help out of the goodness of their hearts (not likely), or they can barter for whatever.  And even then, they don't have to help.  Game ends when a player gets to level 10, or if using epic rules, level 20.

Then, a level 6 player draws a Plutonium Dragon (lv. 20).  I use Wandering Monster to draw a Squidzilla(lv. 19) into the battle.  Note that on both of these, the Bad Things is DEATH (also of note, these are the only two cards for which the Bad Things is death).  Another player uses Ancient (monster level +10) on Plutonium Dragon and Enrage (monster level +5) on the Squidzilla.  Yet another player uses Mate (Call every mate of the monsters in play).  So we've got a level 6 player up against two monsters, one level 60 and another at level 48.  If we pulled the entire party together, we would have won.  He asked me if I would help, I bartered for two treasures upon victory.  He asked if the others would help, they bartered for equipment or items.  When it was finally time to fight, everyone pulled out, keeping whatever they bartered.  He failed on his escape roll.  Needless to say...

[Janus Whitefurr]

Anything that involved me and my three friends cursing each other at a board game I only barely remember called Talisman. It was a fantasy game. Often, bad things would happen. Sadly, my memory isn't what it once was.... I just remember us making snark at each other.

[Noone]

One of my favorite stories comes from playing Age of Mythology. I was never really into that game, but I had some fun with it, though one of my online stories stands out, as I managed to nearly single-handedly save a match with a few chariot archers, well, in a way.

We were playing a 5 players against 3 titan computers. Basically, computers on the 'titan' difficulty setting can build/upgrade a lot faster than players can, I don't remember the exact numbers but what they got for free was pretty absurd. They were in their fourth age while some of the players were still building their economies in the second age.

Anyways, I was playing Egypt, Isis to be exact, I usually played Hades, but eh. The map we were playing on was called 'Ghost lake.' Basically, there is a large, icy lake in the center, you can't build on it, but it's a very large battleground for troops to duke it out. On the edges were the player's bases. I was going with my usual strategy of building up a whole bunch of chariot archers for hit-and-run tactics. I had built up a few, and placed them in the center for scouting purposes, when I saw a gigantic army from the three computers coming along. Any one of them could have easily wiped all of us off the map. My partners were in a state of semi-panic, they sent their forces to the center, only to get them butchered easily. I was trying some hit-and-run tactics with my archers as usual, but there were too many, and they had archers of their own. So, I decided it was time to conserve my forces, build up defenses, and run away from the massive army.

Well, it worked with more success than I had hoped.

I noticed that the computer's army had AI locked my chariot archers, aka, they would chase them almost to the exclusion of all else. New troops they sent in to reinforce their armies would continue chasing them. Fortunately, they were faster or as fast as anything they sent after me. So, it's a huge lake, I figured, lets run around in circles, they could chase me all night.

And they did.

So, here I am, 2 chariot archers against a ginormous army. At first, my partners were yelling at me for not building anything. The problem here, was that I had to keep almost all of my attention on my archers, or they would get gobbled up and we would lose. I couldn't even get pauses to type things in to my team-mates. Fortunately, with the pinging function, I showed them what I was doing. They were in a state of almost panic, though I gave them all the order not to help me, from there, we, as a team knew what to do. I gave them all time to build up their own forces, while I kept their forces in an endless loop chasing after 2 guys who in any normal world would probably have starved and their horses/camels legs would have fallen off by now. But, I remained vigilant. I was occasionally able to reinforce their number, after the computer started sending some faster troops after my guys. I was only able to have them shoot a few times, but it was enough to keep the AI focused on my two archers.

Well, after a good deal of running, shooting, screaming, my allies were able to build up large forces of their own in relative comfort. (Of course it's only relative when you have a huge force of monsters and soldiers right outside your doorstep.) Eventually, they built up a large fortification, and filled their armies to maximum capacity. At this time, I was entirely unable to look after my economy or build anything for that matter, so I was still in the third age while everyone was in the fourth, I also had about 10000 of every resource and maxed favor. After we had finally committed our forces to one area, my chariot archers waltzed on in, castles and towers set, the players, with superior numbers and advantage of terrain, wiped out their force entirely. I think one of my chariot archers survived too.

After that, it was pretty much mop-up, the computers were able to raise some forces to combat ours, but not in time, by then we were already reducing their bases to rubble. Well, not I anyways, I still had to get my economy in order, tell my workers to get to a new gold mine, advance to fourth age, and get a few troops of my own. I was able to get some forces ready for the final assault, though I mostly just at that point gave my resources to my allies. However, by that point, it was already mop-up.

It was one of my favorite matches, taking advantage of an exceptionally thick AI. It was fun.

[Corgatha Taldorthar]

My favorite personal D&D story was one game in D&D 2, where I played a human cleric. (forget which diety). We had some mission to take out a vampire lair or something, which promised to be really, really tough. So one of the things we did to prepare was have my guy use some incense of meditation.

For you non-D&Ders, Incense of meditation is something that a cleric uses when preparing his spells. Once used, all the spells he casts that day are "maximized", he always gets the best possible roll. Cure light wounds heals 1d8 plus level. With the incense, it heals 8 plus level, etc.

Well, after we do our prep, our DM hands me this note that it was actually cursed incense of obsession, not meditation. Incense of obsession (wiki quote) "These blocks of incense appear to be incense of meditation. If meditation and prayer are conducted while incense of obsession is burning nearby, its odor and smoke cause the user to become totally confident that her spell ability is superior, due to the magic incense. The user is determined to use her spells at every opportunity, even when not needed or when useless. The user remains obsessed with her abilities and spells until all have been used or cast, or until 24 hours have elapsed. "

So, anyway, here I am, with an obsessed cleric, about to hit the baddie lair. The other players didn't know yet, and the guy I played was a bit of an oddball. I remember we climbed down some stairs that were slippery or something, and one of our less dextrtous characters failed a roll, fell down the stairs, and took something like 2 damage. (we were 15th level) So, acting obsessed, I cried out about the "grevious wound" and cast my best heal spell on him. For the next 10 minutes everyone else in the party yelled at me, and I replied by acting in character and claiming how nothing is too good for my wonderful comrades in arms. It took them about six or seven spells before they realized what went wrong, and of course, they couldn't convince my character of the need to retreat. Eventually they had to beat him unconscious and drag him back to town for another attempt.

[Rakala]

Best D&D story for me came from my best character. We were exploring a goblin cave and we see a pool of water. Me being an unexperienced gamer I run over to look into it. Out pops four giant frogs, one of which has my character with his tongue. The way it worked was I made a grapple check each round, and when I failed I got closer to being eaten. Now the cleric cast a spell of paralysis, not reading the spell closely enough. His understanding was it affected all enemies, when in reality it stunned all creatures. DM saved for each of the frogs, comes around to me I roll a natural 1 to save against paralysis. An odd and abrupt ending to my first character ever.

[Ryudo Lee]

Over the years, we've compiled a list of do's and do-not's.

No one should roleplay a face character, and talk for more than 20 minutes at a time, uninterrupted.  And I mean that in real time, not game time.

Do not abuse rules that the DM isn't fully aware of, as that makes the DM learn more rules to use against us.

Dancing in the street because the DM okay'd gestahlting is generally unacceptable.

No one can play a Warhulk.  Ever.  Stop asking.

No, you cannot have earrings.  Stop asking.

I don't care if the rules might allow it, using a giant mirror to send an entire bank into another dimension cannot be done.  Stop asking.

"But the city is not on fire" is not a good excuse to start lobbing vials of alchemy fire at random.

It's generally understood that when the most powerful fighter in the game is holding you back from attacking an enemy in their own base while you're sneaking around in disguise, he's probably got the right idea.

If you blow up the universe, we will never let you live it down.

It will cause friction in the party if you magically force a sex change on one of the party members.

Arguments over how percentile dice actually work will not be tolerated.

No, you cannot play an awakened hummingbird.  I don't care if you can find rules for it, the answer is no.

No, you cannot play an awakened duck.  I don't care if you can find rules for it, the answer is no.

"I win" is not a real spell.

It's not a good idea to give the soul of a paladin that is trapped in a soul gem to Tiamat as a "treat".

[Lisky]

it seems you forgot an important one... as a low level character, shouting "i ate your babies" to a dire wolf matriarch as a taunt is never a good idea, especially when one rolls a 20 while doing it...

[Rakala]

What about the one everybody knows?

When fleeing a dragon, you don't have to be faster than the dragon. You only have to be faster than the slowest character.

[Brownie]

A few here...
1) Playing DnD with a couple of friends. We were versing Kobolds (Guys with 1hp). My friend happened to be the tanker of the group so he ran in. They swarmed him and I came up behind them. I was a DragonBorn Paladin so I had the spell "Dragon's Breath". It hits everything in a 9x9 square in front of me. They happened to mob my friend in a perfect 9x9 square. You might be able to see where this is going by now. I rolled to hit against everyone. I missed EVERY Kobold and rolled a 20 (Instant hit, Maximum Damage) on my friend. He nearly died.

2) While some friends were playing Warhammer 40k, some of the terrain was a crashed ship. We had a big debate over who crashed it. Was it a possesed Chaos Marine? How about a Distracted Space Marine? An inadequate Adeptus Mechanicus? We decided on the smartest Ork in the tribe. EVERYONE was laughing. THen we had a great time watching one side get beat up (Dark Eldar (Toilet paper armour) vs Necrons (With a GOD and a building that MOVES and has a giant lazer firing CRYSTAL ON TOP!))

[Ryudo Lee]

I've got a new one, which actually turned out to be pretty cool.

I said the wrong thing to the DM early on in the campaign, I don't remember what I said.  He said he would get back at me within 3 game sessions.  Well, I forgot all about that.  He didn't.  During the last session, he told us to pick a number between 1 and 6, but told me to pick two numbers.  Thinking nothing of it, we all picked our numbers and went on.  Well, we later found out what those numbers were for.  One of our party (not me) was captured during a large combat.  We ended the session there.  But then the DM said he was gunning for me to get back at me for what I had said, but the dice picked another person to get captured.  Everyone looked at me, and I just smiled and said "And I still beat the odds!"

[Corgatha Taldorthar]

1) Playing DnD with a couple of friends. We were versing Kobolds (Guys with 1hp). My friend happened to be the tanker of the group so he ran in. They swarmed him and I came up behind them. I was a DragonBorn Paladin so I had the spell "Dragon's Breath". It hits everything in a 9x9 square in front of me. They happened to mob my friend in a perfect 9x9 square. You might be able to see where this is going by now. I rolled to hit against everyone. I missed EVERY Kobold and rolled a 20 (Instant hit, Maximum Damage) on my friend. He nearly died.

One of my first games with D&D 3 had two seperate encounters with Kobolds that taught the importance of cover and initative. (I was at the time more used to the Power play gaming of 2.) The first encounter, we got attacked at night by a group of about 20 kobolds (there were 6 of us, all first level) They shot arrows, we had trouble seeing them, and we were frighteningly close to a TPK. We manage to get away, heal up, and infiltrate the dungeon that we were going towards. We encounter a second group of 20 kobolds, same tribe, when they round a corner and see us. We manage to surprise them this time,e and our mage shoots off a color spray, managing to render 18 of the said 20 kobolds helpless. It was a one sided fight after that.

[rabid_fox]

One time, I fell asleep playing Final Fantasy VII with the controller in my hand and woke up the next morning, still with the controller in my hand and resumed playing for several minutes before I realised what had just happened.

Damned good times.

[TheGreyRonin]

From a long time ago, during an old Star Wars d6 game I ran.

The players were sent to investigate and report back about a desert planet that was being invaded by a race that used primarily robots as scouts and shock troops. Think Terminators, only many more of them, and a bit smarter. They found out that the robots were taking all people hostage for an undisclosed reason, and were given a chance to escape to their ship while dodging patrols.
One bright guy gets it in his head that they can free and rescue everyone captured the entire planet, and convinces the others to go along. Of course, they run across a robot patrol, and are given the opportunity again to escape. Smart Guy opens his mouth again, states they can hide in a nearby building that had been partly destroyed. As GM, I felt compelled to tell them that their footprints in the sand and dirt would be visible.
Solution? "I know, we'll SHOOT OUR FOOTPRINTS!"
Next game started with an entirely new cast, sent to rescue the others.

[Corgatha Taldorthar]

One time, I fell asleep playing Final Fantasy VII with the controller in my hand and woke up the next morning, still with the controller in my hand and resumed playing for several minutes before I realised what had just happened.

Damned good times.

Oh, this one brings back memories..........


*Waaaay* back in the day, I was a die hard (and damn good, one of the top on the net) Age of Empires two player. Our clan had merged with another clan, and I was settling things with their top dog player as to who had the hand on the best stick.

It was the summer, we were both kids, off of school. We decided on an eight game match, one game per day, over eight days. All eight games were drawn. (You do this by setting up allied victory and you can in essence, offer and accept a draw a la chess by having the players ally one another for a few seconds that it takes the comp to register it)

We decide to extend the match, eight more games. Six more short draws.

On game number 15, I was already kind of sick of this, and I managed to sieze an advantage early, but not quite enough to break through his (extremely good) defense. I push, and I push, and I push, but I can't quite break through. It was like one of those calc problems that you keep rising by an ever smaller increase, ever appreaching whatever the asysmptote is, but not quite reaching it.

The game lasted a bit over fourteen hours before I finally called it quits and offered a hand of peace. Post game analysis of the video seemed to show us sleeping during parts of the game, with troops marching on pre-ordered patrol routes and workers scrambling for ever scarcer resources.......


Good times, good times.

[Keleth]

I was playing a DnD campaign in which it was very ConanEsque.

I was playing a Chosen Soul, which is a kind of fighter cleric who had fire as my magic resistance. And another member of our party was a Chinese influenced alchemists fire sort of guy, bit of a pyromaniac but who's main gig was bard like songs and speeches.

We were fighting some orcs and monsters inside a mountain fortress, and attacked their leader inside his throne chamber,  Our party was almost defeated, started to retreat but I got locked into the room, but not before our Resident Pyromaniac had thrown his full sac of alchemists fire (about 20 potions or so) into the room, which was adorned all over with carpets, wood finishings, and various oils and hard alchohols.

So, the whole room now in flames, the villain and his henchmen trying to put out the fires and forgot about me for a few rounds.  I grab a intact bottle of oil, smash it onto my face which bursts into flames and yell "You're COMING WITH ME!" and bear hug the orc warlord. 

His minions flee through their secret exit, and I drag a barley alive and screaming like a girl Warlord outside and have the party heal him up just enough so he tells us where his weapons cache is.

I liked Chosen soul, fire resistance is awesome