[Art/Writing] Jairus: Merry Christmas

Started by Jairus, July 20, 2008, 04:25:08 AM

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Jairus

Okay, this is just something I threw together. It's sort of meant to be a legend that's told on the world of Belenus, and it's basically all that they have on Annwyn, the wizard who defeated the gods. It's a part of one of their creation myths. It's not supposed to rhyme.

In time now past, gods walked as men.
Their form and light, among man stood.
All-seeing eyes, undying flesh:
Their power pure, their will unmatch'd.
Ten gods there were, with balance forged
Within their ranks, and with their might.
This world was theirs, as they saw fit.
Judgment on high and fate they gripped.
A mage by birth, of mighty strength
Stood twixt the gods and man below.
With force beyond what gods did have
He stood his ground, and severed bonds
'Tween gods and man, their power gone:
When light did fade, the gods took leave.
Beyond the sky and hidden far:
Forgotten now, they watch man still.

Well, there you go. Questions? Comments? Concerns? WTFs?

EDIT: Wow? Eight pages. Damn.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Pagan

Not bad far as poems go.
Though is this just a little something to add to Belenus or is it plot revelant? The gods I mean, not Annwyn.
After a long time, some things change. Some things don't. And I still love Regina!

Jairus

It's not quite a poem... it's iambic tetrameter, and it's supposed to be "free verse" or whatever you call a poem where the lines don't rhyme. And it was a lot of fun to write.

Plot relevant. It'll either be told before the prologue or told at some point in the story. As for the gods... hehehehehe.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Jairus

Given how short "today's" post was, I feel like posting something else. This was written about three months ago, and arguably is what got me started writing my ideas down to finally start writing (incidentally, I have the bare framework of a plot for the first Terra book). It's an extract from some stuff I typed up about hybrid genetics, and some of it might not fit into my universe as of yet. Now let's see if a question or three will help me get this organized...

"Now, you can get hybrids of various races that you wouldn't think could naturally breed, but the trick is that stuff like that is A) damn bloody rare (which, paradoxically, means that these rare hybrids show up more often in history books), B) dependent on a lot of help for conception and gestation, and C) dependent on a lot of extra external factors. Aside from our ideas (i.e. artificial insemination and maybe a few bits of gene therapy to make sure that the parts line up right on a cellular level), the only really explored means of producing a rarer hybrid is for conception and gestation to occur in an environment of high background magical energy, since magic in it's wild natural state has a tendency of making sure that things like this work out all-right. This does have a tendency of giving the resulting child magical powers whereas the parents might not have had them, which only adds to the likelihood of them becoming someone important. Destiny works in weird ways sometimes. Conversely, intensely magical races (like were-races (werewolves, werecats, wolfwere (they exist), etc.)) have problems linking up with other magical races because their funky genetics tends to get in the way... which is why most of the were-races you encounter are humans or elves or dwarves or other races that aren't all that magically inclined. Note that actual magical powers don't really factor into this. Incidentally, the were-races and the merfolk - as well as so-called "anthros" (anthropomorphic animals) - were most likely the result of these interbreedings."

Okay, hopefully this'll help me figure out how these pieces fit together.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? WTFs?
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Pagan

Don't you just love how wild magic can make million to one into ninety-nine percent chance?
And the hell is a wolfwere? A wolf that changes into a human at full moon?
After a long time, some things change. Some things don't. And I still love Regina!

Jairus

Quote from: Pagan on August 27, 2008, 01:14:34 AM
Don't you just love how wild magic can make million to one into ninety-nine percent chance?
Indeed. Again, I'd like to emphasize that it's rare... it's not like it happens all that often. And it's fickle: note how Nick, despite being the seventh child of two seventh children, one of whom was an adventurer and the other of whom was given a few "upgrades" by grateful Creatures and Beings, and yet he is not a wizard and is actually a fairly poor sorcerer simply because he doesn't trust wild magic.

Quote from: Pagan on August 27, 2008, 01:14:34 AM
And the hell is a wolfwere? A wolf that changes into a human at full moon?
In my universe, were-folk are only forced to become their animal form on a full moon if that is the nature of their affliction. It's a very powerful bit of magic that creates the were curse (it is technically a curse). It's a curse sealed into the blood of the family that has it, so it's very much like Warlock magic (in fact, Warlock magic is a more advanced and more powerful version of Were magic). Most were-folk can change their shape at will. So, a wolf-were is a wolf cursed with the ability to become human at will. Interestingly, not many were-folk can use "normal magic" outside of sorcery (sorcery really is the cure-all for any non-magical being's problems, isn't it?), but they have their own magical abilities. Aside from shapeshifting and an instinctive understanding of how to move and operate in that form, they also tend to heal faster and better than most beings. They tend to have some resistance to magic. They also have amplified physical abilities and senses in their "being form," and retain their human mind and intellect in their "beast form." In addition, both their Beast and Being form tends to be slightly more muscular and powerful than a normal member of their species: a Werewolf would have both a physically fit Being body and a really powerful and fairly large Beast body. Really, any form of Beast can be used (there have been weresaurians or even werewyvern in the past... yes, I can feel your jaw drop at the awesomeness), but to my knowledge there has been no were-folk with a Creature beast form: Beast to Being and vice versa only. It's actually not a bad lot that they get. As for vulnerabilities... I don't think that silver works on them. Really, pretty much anything will kill a were-being, so long as you use enough of it.
As for if it's possible to remove the Were curse... I'm not certain. I'd imagine that it would be possible, but I doubt any were-person would want that to happen to them. Albeit, the "Feral mind on the full moon" is a bit of a downside, but with proper planning that's easy to get around. The Full/Feral type tends to be the ones with a weakness to silver: whoever created them originally wanted to have some way of controlling them when they were in their berserker state, and silver was as good a metal as any.
I don't know how common Werefolk are on Terra, but I believe they're extinct on Belenus.

Okay, questions? Comments? Clarifications? Concerns? WTFs?
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Pagan

Ya know, most people make being a were not that great. Your weres on the other hand is basically a being +2.
No more questions from this peanut.
After a long time, some things change. Some things don't. And I still love Regina!

Jairus

Quote from: Pagan on August 27, 2008, 02:02:32 AM
Ya know, most people make being a were not that great. Your weres on the other hand is basically a being +2.
More like Being +1. There are a handful of disadvantages. Actually, now that I think about it, maybe the inherent magical abilities of Were-folk make it impossible for them to be wizards. I'll have to think that through. They've already got a buttload of magical abilities, so I wouldn't be too surprised. I'm inclined to believe that they can only successfully breed with Beings or Beasts... and that's where little beast-were's come from (imagine Fluffy saying that, and it becomes about three times as funny). Were's also have a bit of a bum rap, unfortunately, and tend to hide out in society and rarely use their abilities in public. And just because they heal faster doesn't mean they have a healing factor (that's dragons, actually... I'm not kidding when I say dragons have been vaporized by some powerful spell and have simply regenerated, smirked, and did the exact same attack right back at their attackers. It's one of Dreksa's favorite tricks. And it makes me smile just thinking about it), so they can still be killed by slightly-greater-than-normal means.

Now that I think about Dreksa's "condition," he's kind of similar to a Wereperson. Interesting. I have to think this through.

Ayiyiyiyiyi, this is what you get when you're finally figuring this stuff out. But it's so much fun!

Quote from: Pagan on August 27, 2008, 02:02:32 AM
No more questions from this peanut.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Jairus

I was bored. This will probably never make it in, or at least not this way. Covenant Wars stuff.

"Practice"

      "So do I learn dueling now?" the boy asked.
      "I am not going to teach you how to duel." Dreksa didn't look up from the two training blades he was checking for defects. "Both I and my master hold and held the belief that dueling is for those afraid of bloodshed. I am teaching you how to fight. There's a difference." With a final look, Dreksa seemed happy. He passed one of the wooden blades to Treyl as they walked to the other side of the clearing.
      "And what's the difference?"
      "Remember how I defeated the Lord Proctor?"
      "Yeah, you kicked him between his legs and then ran him through the neck between the gap in his armor."
      "Exactly."
      "But that was dirty fighting!"
      "Speaks the street urchin who steals from soldiers and then runs off to kill sewer rats."
      "Shut up, Kiyo!" Treyl called out to the pirate busy cleaning his gun.
      "Well, he's right. Anyway, as I was saying, there's no such thing as dirty fighting. If you have it, use it. If you don't have the room to slash, hit them with the hilt. Throw dirt, kick someone in the knee, punch them in the face when you lock blades."
      "I don't fight that way."
      "You're going to have to learn how. You're not dealing with mutant rats and training dummies: you are fighting monsters and human beings. Most of whom are trying to kill you. You've got some skills, some training, and some experience." At which point Dreksa spun around and disarmed the boy before he could even blink and caught the sword before he handed it back to Treyl. "Your enemies are trained soldiers, and they will also fight dirty. You need to fight dirtier." And at this point Dreksa pulled out a wooden practice dagger and tossed it to Treyl. "And you need to learn that a dagger is not meant to be a secondary weapon: it is for parrying and surprise attacks."
      "Yeah, but it works great how I've used it," Treyl protested.
         Dreksa grinned slightly. "Yes, you have. And I don't want you to lose that. However, if you learn the basics of dagger usage, you can improve your skills with how you want to use it. So..." – and here the swordsman took an en guarde position a few feet from Treyl – "We're just going to practice with you using the dagger and sword to block. No attacking, unless you see an opening. Understand?"
      "Yes," Treyl said in an unsure voice.
      "Keep on your toes: I'm not going to go easy. And these things still hurt, so you're going to get bruised if you're not fast enough."
      "I've used wasters before."
      "Then we'll begin."

Okay, there. Something for the day. It's barely a page long, and they don't fight, but I don't care.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Jairus

#219
I'm tired, but I'm posting something, dammit!


The black blade strikes true.
The enemy falters, and then falls.
Blood drips down the edge.

Duels are for those who
Fear to shed their blood. Swordsmen
Know only fighting.

The winds blow softly.
A falling leaf falls in two.
A sword is sheathed.

A true swordsman knows
That a blade is not needed:
Only the will to fight.


Yay! Crappy haiku! And it only took me like five minutes. Good night!

EDIT: I just realized that I wrote four separate haiku that could be read as a part of the same story. Hm. Oh well.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Cogidubnus

Ah. I like these!

I think I'd have to disagree with the last one, though. I'm not sure if a warrior has a 'will to fight', necessarily - that's not what's meant by 'Zanshin' I don't think, anyway. As my sensei has taught me, the best strike of the sword is the one that never leaves the sheath. As Sun Tzu said, any general can win a battle - it is the height of tactics to win a battle without having to fight.

Jairus

#221
Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 03:33:18 PM
Ah. I like these!
I'm glad you liked them.

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 03:33:18 PM
I think I'd have to disagree with the last one, though. I'm not sure if a warrior has a 'will to fight', necessarily - that's not what's meant by 'Zanshin' I don't think, anyway. As my sensei has taught me, the best strike of the sword is the one that never leaves the sheath. As Sun Tzu said, any general can win a battle - it is the height of tactics to win a battle without having to fight.

True. I will say this: Dreksa prefers not to kill. He offers his opponents a chance to surrender, and he likes to disarm or neutralize an enemy rather than kill them. If he's fighting a monster or beast, he tries to take it down with as little resistance as possible, and has been known to elad them away rather than hurt them. Injuries tend to be the kind that will heal cleanly, and even when he does kill it tends to be quick and fairly painless. Dreksa knows that bloodshed and fighting is sometimes necessary, he just doesn't revel in it. He would agree with you, though. I guess his mentality is that a warrior must have the will to fight if necessary.

But when he gets pissed off... then the gloves come off and he starts doing scary things. Really scary things. This is the kind of guy who could use the most vile and evil dark element spell and come down from it the same way he was before. He's seen the darkness of his own soul, and he's not afraid of it, which is what helps him defeat an enemy who tries to force his opponent to be paralyzed by their own darkness: he's already faced and conquered his own darkness. Does that kind of make sense?
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Cogidubnus

Quote from: Jairus on August 29, 2008, 04:32:34 PM
True. I will say this: Dreksa prefers not to kill. He offers his opponents a chance to surrender, and he likes to disarm or neutralize an enemy rather than kill them. If he's fighting a monster or beast, he tries to take it down with as little resistance as possible, and has been known to elad them away rather than hurt them. Injuries tend to be the kind that will heal cleanly, and even when he does kill it tends to be quick and fairly painless. Dreksa knows that bloodshed and fighting is sometimes necessary, he just doesn't revel in it. He would agree with you, though. I guess his mentality is that a warrior must have the will to fight if necessary.

I understand completely. I don't mean to say that a warrior does not fight, either - as it has been explained to me, Zanshin is not a state of bloodthirst or anger, but a state of presence - being aware of as much around you as possible, and ready to anticipate and react to it. It's not a will to fight, but rather a state of heightened awareness.
I personally study Iaido. The emphasis there is on quick reactions and perceptions, but it has also been explained that the time for perception and reaction is not just when swinging a sword. If you can see the fight coming, you might be able to stop it, or avoid it entirely. The best swordfight you ever have is the one you keep from happening.

Quote from: Jairus on August 29, 2008, 04:32:34 PM
But when he gets pissed off... then the gloves come off and he starts doing scary things. Really scary things. This is the kind of guy who could use the most vile and evil dark element spell and come down from it the same way he was before. He's seen the darkness of his own soul, and he's not afraid of it, which is what helps him defeat an enemy who tries to force his opponent to be paralyzed by their own darkness: he's already faced and conquered his own darkness. Does that kind of make sense?

Your statement reminds me of something - "Wisdom comes from contemplating the matters of life and death". Not entirely related, I suppose - to quote him again, Sun Tzu said something more apt. "If you know others and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles; if you do not know others but know yourself, you win one and lose one; if you do not know others and do not know yourself, you will be imperiled in every single battle."

Jairus

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 09:08:50 PM
Quote from: Jairus on August 29, 2008, 04:32:34 PM
True. I will say this: Dreksa prefers not to kill. He offers his opponents a chance to surrender, and he likes to disarm or neutralize an enemy rather than kill them. If he's fighting a monster or beast, he tries to take it down with as little resistance as possible, and has been known to elad them away rather than hurt them. Injuries tend to be the kind that will heal cleanly, and even when he does kill it tends to be quick and fairly painless. Dreksa knows that bloodshed and fighting is sometimes necessary, he just doesn't revel in it. He would agree with you, though. I guess his mentality is that a warrior must have the will to fight if necessary.

I understand completely. I don't mean to say that a warrior does not fight, either - as it has been explained to me, Zanshin is not a state of bloodthirst or anger, but a state of presence - being aware of as much around you as possible, and ready to anticipate and react to it. It's not a will to fight, but rather a state of heightened awareness.
I personally study Iaido. The emphasis there is on quick reactions and perceptions, but it has also been explained that the time for perception and reaction is not just when swinging a sword. If you can see the fight coming, you might be able to stop it, or avoid it entirely. The best swordfight you ever have is the one you keep from happening.
I know it may look like I'm posting just to agree with you, but I also want to say that all of that makes perfect sense, and is very interesting to think about. I could see Dreksa having learned a form of Zanshin at some point in the past and incorporating it into his style.

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 09:08:50 PM
Quote from: Jairus on August 29, 2008, 04:32:34 PM
But when he gets pissed off... then the gloves come off and he starts doing scary things. Really scary things. This is the kind of guy who could use the most vile and evil dark element spell and come down from it the same way he was before. He's seen the darkness of his own soul, and he's not afraid of it, which is what helps him defeat an enemy who tries to force his opponent to be paralyzed by their own darkness: he's already faced and conquered his own darkness. Does that kind of make sense?

Your statement reminds me of something - "Wisdom comes from contemplating the matters of life and death". Not entirely related, I suppose - to quote him again, Sun Tzu said something more apt. "If you know others and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles; if you do not know others but know yourself, you win one and lose one; if you do not know others and do not know yourself, you will be imperiled in every single battle."
Ooh... I have to remember that Sun Tzu quote. That might very well help me figure out the dangers of dark elemental magic and black magic. Most people who use that kind of power might not know themselves, and that's why they're corrupted by it: Dreksa and a few others know themselves too well to be endangered by it. Thank you for helping me figure out how to put that in words.

Now I just need to figure out something to post for tonight.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Cogidubnus

QuoteI know it may look like I'm posting just to agree with you, but I also want to say that all of that makes perfect sense, and is very interesting to think about. I could see Dreksa having learned a form of Zanshin at some point in the past and incorporating it into his style.

Zanshin isn't so much a technique as a state of mind - honestly, I don't know how to describe it very well, and I wouldn't know how to tell someone to 'use' it. I suppose it's a product of experience as much as anything else.

QuoteNow I just need to figure out something to post for tonight.

Well, I'm not sure what you might post tonight, but I thought I'd just say your story about the boy learning to fight dirty was interesting. I'd definitely agree that anything you can cut, stab, or make bleed in combat is fair game. Musashi said, "The way of my school is gaining victory by any means." (in reference to to Hyōhō Niten Ichi-ryū) - I don't think I have to tell you what he meant, there.

There is a story about two samurai who had a duel. During the course of it, one samurai gained advantage over the other one and cut off his right hand. Victoriously, the samurai sheathed his sword, prepared to gloat over his enemy as he bled out. The injured samurai saw his chance, and stabbed the other in the neck with the sharp bone protruding from his wrist.
In this way, two principles - Zanshin, being alert and present always, and victory by any means.

Jairus

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 10:05:32 PM
Zanshin isn't so much a technique as a state of mind - honestly, I don't know how to describe it very well, and I wouldn't know how to tell someone to 'use' it. I suppose it's a product of experience as much as anything else.
Sorry, I wasn't implying that Zanshin was a technique, I was saying that Dreksa would have... okay, I can't rephrase that properly. Dreksa's style is very much like Musashi's (and in fact his teacher was a Musashi-like figure who also made her own swords), in that it is always growing and adapting. No two practitioners of this style have the same methodology, and they basically take what works and abandon what doesn't. It really is a mindset more than an actual sword fighting style. I can imagine, though, that Dreksa would have made Zanshin or something very like it into a part of his own beliefs and ways of life. So... the moral here is that I need to understand my thoughts better and get them organized.

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 10:05:32 PM
QuoteNow I just need to figure out something to post for tonight.
Well, I'm not sure what you might post tonight, but I thought I'd just say your story about the boy learning to fight dirty was interesting. I'd definitely agree that anything you can cut, stab, or make bleed in combat is fair game. Musashi said, "The way of my school is gaining victory by any means." (in reference to to Hyōhō Niten Ichi-ryū) - I don't think I have to tell you what he meant, there.

There is a story about two samurai who had a duel. During the course of it, one samurai gained advantage over the other one and cut off his right hand. Victoriously, the samurai sheathed his sword, prepared to gloat over his enemy as he bled out. The injured samurai saw his chance, and stabbed the other in the neck with the sharp bone protruding from his wrist.
In this way, two principles - Zanshin, being alert and present always, and victory by any means.
I certainly have heard of Musashi, but I don't recall reading his book at any point. I really should, shouldn't I? And I think that Dreksa and Musashi would have had some things in common if they had ever met.

You are just a wealth of information along these lines, aren't you? Though that's to be expected, isn't it?
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Cogidubnus

QuoteI certainly have heard of Musashi, but I don't recall reading his book at any point. I really should, shouldn't I? And I think that Dreksa and Musashi would have had some things in common if they had ever met.

The Book of Five Rings is a pretty good read. It's fairly short, too, only 88 pages or so. A good thirty minutes or an hour or so read, on a rainy afternoon.

And hopefully not entirely. They say Mushashi never took a bath or combed his hair.  :P

QuoteYou are just a wealth of information along these lines, aren't you? Though that's to be expected, isn't it?

I do like mah pointies.  :B

Honestly, I don't know very much. Just what I've read and what I've been taught, which isn't too terribly much at all. The Art of War and the Book of Five Rings are very short and good books, though, if you've got an interest.

Jairus

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 29, 2008, 10:33:17 PM
The Book of Five Rings is a pretty good read. It's fairly short, too, only 88 pages or so. A good thirty minutes or an hour or so read, on a rainy afternoon.

And hopefully not entirely. They say Mushashi never took a bath or combed his hair.  :P
Consider it and The Art of War on my reading list. Which I shall get to eventually.

And no worries... Dreksa's not that bad. His teacher, on the other hand, might have been...
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Jairus

I'm tired from my freaking dentist's appointment. Enjoy my crappy poetry.

An old blade planted
In the ground. A simple grave
For a single man.

And now a little iambic tetrameter (I tried to write in pentameter, but for some reason I couldn't make it work. Weird.)

Where once men fought, they lie instead
Their words and deeds forgotten now.
Why did they fight? What was their cause?
Who led them here? When was their time?
How did they die? Their foes lie too,
But know no one can tell who's who.
Their colors fade, their armor gone,
What once they fought has gone away.
A silent field, that's all remains

Hm. Nine lines... and yet it feels done. Interesting. Or stupid. I forget which.

Good night.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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VSMIT

14 lines isn't a requirement.  As long as you're not doing a sonnet.  And you don't have the rhyme scheme for either sonnet form anyway.  Interesting view on battle and war.

The haiku starts off strong, but ends a little weakly.  Don't know how you can easily fix it, though.

Wow.  The first things I read in your thread.

Jairus

Quote from: VSMIT on August 30, 2008, 03:06:57 AM
14 lines isn't a requirement.  As long as you're not doing a sonnet.  And you don't have the rhyme scheme for either sonnet form anyway.  Interesting view on battle and war.
Well, I wasn't trying to write a sonnet, but I did want to have an even number of lines. I guess it's done as it is. I'm cool with that.

Quote from: VSMIT
The haiku starts off strong, but ends a little weakly.  Don't know how you can easily fix it, though.
Neither do I. Maybe Cogi has a suggestion if he reads it.

Quote from: VSMIT
Wow.  The first things I read in your thread.
Thanks. Have a look around: I love questions. It helps me catch my mistakes and figure out more about these worlds that I've been building in my mind.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

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Cogidubnus

Quote from: Jairus on August 30, 2008, 03:10:36 AM
Neither do I. Maybe Cogi has a suggestion if he reads it.

Ah, well. I'm not entirely sure what I could suggest, but I suppose I could steal what you've got there and twist it in my own fashion.

An old blade planted
in battleground. A grave.
Bones are simple.

Iambic tetrameter is fun, also. To be honest, it looks finished to me too. The one thing I might change - on the sixth line, instead of "Who's who", I'd get rid of the contraction and put "Who is who" - to me, it just seems to roll off the tongue better.

Very nice, as always.

Jairus

Quote from: Cogidubnus on August 30, 2008, 04:17:56 PM
Quote from: Jairus on August 30, 2008, 03:10:36 AM
Neither do I. Maybe Cogi has a suggestion if he reads it.

Ah, well. I'm not entirely sure what I could suggest, but I suppose I could steal what you've got there and twist it in my own fashion.

An old blade planted
in battleground. A grave.
Bones are simple.
Well, that doesn't work for what I was trying to convey, but I think that definitely works for you. Now you get to ponder whether I'm insulting you or not... okay, I'm not insulting you. Thanks for the advice.
... actually...

An old blade planted
In the ground. A simple grave
For a fallen man.

I like that better.

Quote from: Cogidubnus
Iambic tetrameter is fun, also. To be honest, it looks finished to me too. The one thing I might change - on the sixth line, instead of "Who's who", I'd get rid of the contraction and put "Who is who" - to me, it just seems to roll off the tongue better.

Actually, that works... just a moment...
Okay. I had to rearrange that line a little bit to get the meter right, but I think it flows better now.

Where once men fought, they lie instead
Their words and deeds forgotten now.
Why did they fight? What was their cause?
Who led them here? When was their time?
How did they die? Their foes lie too,
But now none tell from who is who.
Their colors fade, their armor gone,
What once they fought has gone away.
A silent field, that's all remains.

Hm, yes that feels better.

Quote from: Cogidubnus
Very nice, as always.
Thanks. I'm actually trying to get some basic information on the various Imperial combatants and that sort of information up for tonight, but I'll see if I can't sneak something in.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

Avatar by Lilchu

Jairus

This is a sort of breakdown of how the Deinan Imperial military is split up and organized. This is still a work in progress, and I'll probably need to work on it, but here we go anyway.

Basic breakdown
   The Imperial Military is divided into three major portions: the Imperial Navy, the Imperial Army, and the Imperial Air. Despite the separations between them, in practice they are almost treated like one big group. All Imperial divisions use an identical ranking structure to minimize confusion. These ranks are a relic of a time when the Military was divided into Navy and Army, and as such reflects a hybridization of the old ranking systems. In order, they are Private, Corporal, Sergeant, Warrant Officer, Ensign, Lieutenant, Lt. Commander, Commander, Captain, Colonel, Major, and Commodore, with Junior and Senior sub-ranks in-between. There is also the title "Captain," which is traditionally granted to the pilot or commander of a skycraft or naval vessel. The Imperial Military ultimately answers to the Senate, and not the Royal Family.
   The Imperial Navy is in charge of all large combat skycraft and all actual naval vessels. Originally, the Navy was completely concentrated in aquatic combat and vessels, but the advancement of skycraft means that the Navy has been mostly reassigned to this area. The Navy is organized into several fleets, which are called The Imperial (Number) Fleet when referred to: the largest of these fleets is the Imperial 1st Fleet, which is always under the command of one of the Imperial High Proctors. Essentially, if a skycraft has guns and is larger than a fighter or gunboat, it belongs under the Navy's perview.
   The Army obviously includes all ground forces and the like. It is perhaps the oldest of the Imperial divisions, and is perhaps the most spread out. Army personnel are even used on naval vessels as guards. Really, aside from them being the more common opponents in the story, I don't know what further to say.
   The Air Force is the most recent addition to the Imperial Arsenal. Since most ship-to-ship combat is done in the air now, the Air Force is basically all fighter-sized skycraft and troop transports. They operate out of Naval skycraft or Army bases. Confession time: this distinctions are basically what I say that they are, so this is probably the best you're going to get unless I get a really good question.

The Corps
   Basically, the various corps' (how do you do the plural form of that properly?) are the specialty divisions. Okay, that's a lie. I just came up with these things so that I know the basic capabilites of the Imperial forces. These are basically the combat units, so I'm not talking about normal crewmen or soldiers. These are just the fighters, if you will... because I'm too lazy to figure out the people we never really see. Much like the different divisions, these are more formalities than anything. It is worth quickly noting that all genders and species are represented in the ranks of the Empire: essentially all-positions are equal opportunity, provided you demonstrate the skills for the job.
Swordsmen
   The standard Imperial unit, Swordsmen wear a combination of plate armor and chain mail. Their standard equipment includes a long falchion weapon, a six-shot revolver, and a buckler shield. They tend not to know magic, and instead use alchemical potions or really low-level spells. Despite the name, both genders and many species are represented in the Swordsmen ranks. And despite their commonness, they are well-trained and skilled.
Marksmen
   The next-most common unit, Marksmen swap the focus of melee/range that Swordsmen have. In place of saber, they have a dagger, and they carry either a rifle or a shotgun in battle. Their armor is slightly redesigned from Swordsmen to accomodate for additional ammo pouches.
Lancer
   A specialized unit, Lancers are more-heavily armed and armoured than swordsman. Their standard equipment is a shield and either a long lance or spear, but they also wield a short sword and a standard sidearm. Their armor is more reinforced than Swordsmen's armor, and they use similar potions and gear. Some of their members also ride mounted on saurians.
Dragoon
   Another mounted unit, Dragoon are essentially Marksmen who ride saurians into battle. They tend to be either snipers or shock-troops, who use their superior speed to get to new positions on the battlefield. They are armed with a saber, a standard sidearm, and either a rifle or a shotgun, like Marksmen.
Demolitions/Bomber
   These guys are the heavy firepower of the bunch. They are basically trained in the usage of explosives for either sapping purposes or anti-personnel. They aren't that heavily armored, and aside from a dagger and standard sidearm their only weapons are a shotgun and a collection of grenades and other explosives. It is worth noting that most ground forces carry at least one or two general-usage grenades with them during duty, but Demo people specialize in it and carry more varied explosives.
Magister
   Sorcerers who have joined the Imperial Forces, Magisters are armored with a combination of plate armor, chain mail, and protective robes. They wield a staff in battle, but their primary strength is in the spells they cast on the battlefield, leaving their dagger and sidearm mostly unused. They mostly work as a sort of support for soldiers on the front line, using long range magic to attack enemies and healing magic to keep their allies going. They also use alchemical potions for quick bursts of magic. They are dangerous opponents, and not to be underestimated.
Healer
   A specialized Magister, Healers obviously specialize in healing and defensive magic. They are less armored than Magisters to allow them to move quickly on the battlefield, relying on their shielding and barrier spells to protect them. They carry only a short sword and a standard sidearm, but most of them know a few attack spells. Much like other forces, they also use alchemic potions for quick spell-casting.
Pilot
   These are never - to my knowledge - actually fought by any of the main characters, but I might as well mention them. Pilot are the least armored of them all, and in fact most of their clothing is basically padding to protect from g-forces. They are armed only with a dagger and standard sidearm. Most pilots serve the Air Force, though a good portion of them also work in the Navy.
Armor
   A new unit, Armors were first introduced during the last period of Imperial Expansion. They are the most heavily armored of all forces, and wear a magitek powered armor into battle that drastically amplifies their strength and carrying capacity while not impeding their speed too greatly. They are either armed with massive swords that are almost impossible to be wielded normally, or high-recoil weaponry that cannot ordinarily be wielded. They also sometimes use grenade launchers or other weaponry. They have been continuously perfected over the years since their first usage, and Doctor Rafe is currently preparing to introduce a new lineup.
Pawns
   A new weapon developed by Doctor Rafe that has yet to see combat outside of testing. There are currently three models: Pawn Bishop, Pawn Rook, and Pawn Knight.
Marines
   The shock-troops and specialized weapons of the bunch, Marines have no set armament aside from the normal sword and sidearm. Shotguns, rifles, grenades, flamethrowers, launchers, spears and lances... all of these are available to be used by Marines. They are the most feared of all ground forces. Unusually, they are not a part of the Army: they answer to the Proctors and High Proctors, and as such actually are considered a part of the Imperial Guard.
Imperial Guard
   Selected from the best and most loyal of the Imperial Forces, the Imperial Guard's role is to protect the Royal Family. This role has expanded somewhat in the last hundred years or so, but has remained basically the same. All of them answer to and serve the Royal Family, though Marines tend to serve alonside the other branches.
Proctor A rank essentially equivalent to Captain, Proctors are highly trained and talented officers. Though they are trained in physical and magical combat, their normal role is to command groups of soldiers in battle. Though they do answer to their superior officers, they still ultimately serve the Royal Family, and could be considered a watchdog to keep the military in line. Proctors also serve the High Proctors in such situations.
Royal Guard
   The bodyguards of the Royal Family, Royal Guards are highly trained and phanatically loyal to the crown. They are trained in a variety of weapons, but their signature weapon is a simple broadsword. They also are all highly trained sorcerers, and tend to hide their armor beneath long flowing robes. All of them have been prosthetically upgraded, making them even more dangerous.
High Proctor
   Essentially the highest rank in the military, the High Proctors not only command the whole of the military forces of the Empire, they also answer directly to the Imperial Royal Family. Their original function was to simply act as protectors and messengers, but their role has greatly expanded and been empowered.  They are the most dangerous opponents in the Imperial forces, commanding mastery of their chosen weapons and tremendous sorcerous powers, in addition to an impressive knowledge of tactics and legal affairs. There are no more than ten High Proctors at a time, all of whom are given a number when they join: i.e. Lord/Lady the First High Proctor through Lord/Lady the Tenth High Proctor. Despite the numbering, the only ranking is that the First High Proctor is considered a first among equals, and the rest are equal to one another. As of the time of this story, there are only six High Proctors.

I again apologize for the HOLY CRAP THREE PAGES. Um, sorry. I apologize for how disorganized this all is. I do not claim any real military knowledge outside of research, so that might be part of the problem.

And I'll see if I can't write a little more poetry for later tonight. I'm watching Freakazoid with my grandpa, so I should be able to write a few things.

Okay. Questions? Comments? Concerns? Ideas? WTF's? Things I missed? Clarifications? Anything? Anything at all?
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

Avatar by Lilchu

techmaster-glitch

This is pretty sweet. I would so be an Armor xD

Or the guy who makes 'em. Either one's good >:3
Avatar:AMoS



Jairus

Quote from: techmaster-glitch on August 30, 2008, 05:07:39 PM
This is pretty sweet. I would so be an Armor xD
Very well. Prepare for intensive amounts of training for a relatively untested form of weaponry with the designer considering you little more than a replaceable part of the machine.

Quote from: techmaster-glitch on August 30, 2008, 05:07:39 PM
Or the guy who makes 'em. Either one's good >:3
Doctor Rafe. A genius invenctor who has done more for the advancement of Imperial tech than anyone else. His list of inventions is longer than my arm. He's a bit like Nick on Terra, except Doctor Rafe is human and most likely insane. He can build and designed basically everything and anything. He is also my self-insert character. Make of that what you will.

I'm surprised you didn't ask for more information about the Pawns.

And now, a technology haiku!

Gears that tick and tock.
Oiled springs and shifting tools.
The song of machines.

Thank you.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

Avatar by Lilchu

techmaster-glitch

Quote from: Jairus on August 30, 2008, 05:19:23 PM
I'm surprised you didn't ask for more information about the Pawns.
Well, I figured that was a classified thing that you wouldn't reveal anyway :B


Quote from: Jairus on August 30, 2008, 05:19:23 PM
And now, a technology haiku!

Gears that tick and tock.
Oiled springs and shifting tools.
The song of machines.

Thank you.
:)
Avatar:AMoS



Jairus

Quote from: techmaster-glitch on August 30, 2008, 05:44:22 PM
Quote from: Jairus on August 30, 2008, 05:19:23 PM
I'm surprised you didn't ask for more information about the Pawns.
Well, I figured that was a classified thing that you wouldn't reveal anyway :B
I never said they were classified, just that they've never been used in battle outside testing. Pawns are clockwork-driven combat robots with a micro-differential engine brain developed by Doctor Rafe. They are powered by magitek and use microboards to program them: built-in sorcery devices and hard weaponry give them a great deal of use. They are slightly shorter than an average adult human, and are heavily armored. Older units used wheels or mechanical legs to move around, while current units use high-powered anti-gravity spells and micro lifts rings to elevate themselves. Knights are melee-oriented, Rooks are defense-oriented, and Bishops are long range and support oriented. For hard weaponry, Knights are armed a mechanical blade and a shield, Rooks carry two moving shields, and Bishops are armed with a rapid-fire gun. Like most Imperial hardware, they are hardened against magical lightning, though they are slightly vulnerable to the real stuff.

Any questions?


Quote from: techmaster-glitch on August 30, 2008, 05:44:22 PM
Quote from: Jairus on August 30, 2008, 05:19:23 PM
And now, a technology haiku!

Gears that tick and tock.
Oiled springs and shifting tools.
The song of machines.

Thank you.
:)
A vessel of steel
With engines of science, yet
It moves like a bird.

Okay, questions?
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

Avatar by Lilchu

Pagan

So do army battlions have a mixture of forces? Like a healer or two, magicians, a crap load of swordsman and marksman, maybe a demo man? Or is it just all the same in one battlion? (If that's not the right word, try "brigade" or something. I don't know military lingo.)
After a long time, some things change. Some things don't. And I still love Regina!

Jairus

Quote from: Pagan on August 31, 2008, 12:57:13 AM
So do army battlions have a mixture of forces? Like a healer or two, magicians, a crap load of swordsman and marksman, maybe a demo man? Or is it just all the same in one battlion? (If that's not the right word, try "brigade" or something. I don't know military lingo.)
Neither do I, but I call them "squads" and they tend to be balanced with a couple of different types of soldiers. The way the heroes encounter them, however, they tend to be in smaller groups... like scouts or border patrol or security. I think there's one big ground battle actually shown, and most of the time the battles shown are for smaller groups, like a couple of Swordsman. And squads can and are organized for particular purposes. These are just basic descriptions of what their jobs are, if you will.
Erupting Burning Sekiha Hell and Heaven Tenkyoken Tatsumaki Zankantō!!
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS! - Amber Williams
"And again I say unto you: bite me." - Harry Dresden
You'll catch crap no matter what sort of net you throw out - Me

Avatar by Lilchu