Bizarre legal filing

[Tapewolf]

Seriously, just read the introduction.  It's from a case about whether it's legal to sell promotional CDs.

http://www.eff.org/files/filenode/umg_v_augusto/AugustoMSJBrief.pdf

[Ryudo Lee]

He opened up with an excerpt from Harry Potter.  Damn.  He must be serious.

[Tapewolf]

He opened up with an excerpt from Harry Potter.  Damn.  He must be serious.

Well, I guess it was either lunacy or genius.  Difficult to tell.


I do like this one, though:
http://www.nationalreview.com/document/document073001.shtml

"In either case, the Court cautions Plaintiff's counsel not to run with a sharpened writing utensil in hand — he could put his eye out."

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Oh, that's lovely.

Some well sharpened sarcastic wit put to good use, there. *grin*

[Ryudo Lee]

He opened up with an excerpt from Harry Potter.  Damn.  He must be serious.

Well, I guess it was either lunacy or genius.  Difficult to tell.


I do like this one, though:
http://www.nationalreview.com/document/document073001.shtml

"In either case, the Court cautions Plaintiff's counsel not to run with a sharpened writing utensil in hand — he could put his eye out."

I particularly like this excerpt from that:

Before proceeding further, the Court notes that this case involves two extremely likable lawyers, who have together delivered some of the most amateurish pleadings ever to cross the hallowed causeway into Galveston, an effort which leads the Court to surmise but one plausible explanation. Both attorneys have obviously entered into a secret pact — complete with hats, handshakes and cryptic words — to draft their pleadings entirely in crayon on the back sides of gravy-stained paper place mats, in the hope that the Court would be so charmed by their child-like efforts that their utter dearth of legal authorities in their briefing would go unnoticed. Whatever actually occurred, the Court is now faced with the daunting task of deciphering their submissions.

With Big Chief tablet readied, thick black pencil in hand, and a devil-may-care laugh in the face of death, life on the razor's edge sense of exhilaration, the Court begins.

[Eibborn]

Before proceeding further, the Court notes that this case involves two extremely likable lawyers, who have together delivered some of the most amateurish pleadings ever to cross the hallowed causeway into Galveston, an effort which leads the Court to surmise but one plausible explanation. Both attorneys have obviously entered into a secret pact — complete with hats, handshakes and cryptic words — to draft their pleadings entirely in crayon on the back sides of gravy-stained paper place mats, in the hope that the Court would be so charmed by their child-like efforts that their utter dearth of legal authorities in their briefing would go unnoticed. Whatever actually occurred, the Court is now faced with the daunting task of deciphering their submissions.

Their names wouldn't happen to be Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth, would they? It seems to be a pretty accurate description. XD

[Zina]

Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth are amazing lawyers, you shut your mouth.

And although it isn't a real legal hearing, my roommate had some amusing shenanigans happen in his law class. His final involved everyone being split off into teams and getting a case. Then they would hold a mock court, where some of their peers would act as judges and submit a final ruling over who won. My roommate got to act as a judge over the case of whether or not Indians should be allowed to hunt for whales.
One side submitted a paper around 20 papers, the normal length. The other side, however, submitted a paper that was 260+ pages. No joke. They tried to send it over e-mail, but it was simply too large.
The paper contained every  law or court hearing that had anything remotely to do with their case, copied and pasted in. They even had a selection written completely in Russian, no translation. What it said or what it had to do with the case is anyone's guess. In fact, only five pages were original text written by the students.
The best part was that they had to print out eight copies of this 260 page paper. I do not envy the kids in the computer lab trying to print out their final paper before class on that day.
Needless to say, the teacher was pissed and made them revise it.

Good times.