Very slow news day for England?

[Aridas]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/coventry_warwickshire/6466793.stm

'Nuff said.

[Tapewolf]

Actually, kids running riot with offensive weapons is fairly uncommon.  I'm curious as to where they got it from - I'm not sure crossbows are legal.

[Aridas]

I just find the whole duck thing very uninteresting. Now if a person.. or maybe even a pet was shot...

[Tapewolf]

I just find the whole duck thing very uninteresting. Now if a person.. or maybe even a pet was shot...

Well for one, Britain has a reputation as a nation of animal lovers, so this kind of thing will tend to draw outrage.  And they probably need a license to hunt ducks - I'm not sure how they're classed.

There was a case I remember reading about ten years or so ago about someone who killed a pigeon by squashing it with a plank of wood.  Just in a street or something.  The RSPCA went absolutely apeshit over that, but the police couldn't press charges because pigeons are classed as vermin and the bird died instantly.

So in this case they might get off for that, but I suspect they'll be in deep shit about the crossbow.  But yes, I could think of more interesting items.

[Alondro]

I don't know... if the laws there are anything like Jersey, you have to have a permit for bow and arrow hunting and only during specific seasons.  If someone did that here, they'd be fined for sure by Fish and Wildlife.

[Aridas]

someone who killed a pigeon by squashing it with a plank of wood.

...squashing it with a plank of wood? You have some WEIRD people over there.

[Gareeku]

Every country has its share of weird people.

[Stygian]

According to the UN constitution and international laws of war, no lethal weapon that does not make a sound when firing is permissible for use upon an enemy combatant. Thus, crossbows, compound bows and the likes are, as Tapewolf said, very illegal.

Just a tidbit of my erroneous knowledge.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Well for one, Britain has a reputation as a nation of animal lovers, so this kind of thing will tend to draw outrage.  And they probably need a license to hunt ducks - I'm not sure how they're classed.

.. From the sound of it, they were aiming at the duck whilst it was on the water. That, to my understanding, is just a little bit illegal no matter how you play it.

Completely avoiding the matter of the illegality of the weapon, which, I'll agree, is another matter entirely. As for using it on human combatants - my personal inclination is anyone in a battle against me deserves whatever they get. Legality is a slippery subject when you're trying to kill each other.... And I'd rather use every weapon I can lay my hands on than end up in a ditch somewhere rotting gently to pieces. Alive or dead, either way...

[Aridas]

Other than all that, i'm not sure why they had to mention the jean-wearing quality of the two other people.

[Zina]

It sounds like they haven't caught them yet, and are just trying to give people as much information on what the look like as they can.

[Tezkat]

Last I checked, crossbows were legal in the UK, albeit not for shooting ducks, and certainly not for kids. Although not always legal for hunting, it's still legal to own crossbows in many western countries (much to the chagrin of law enforcement--those things go through Kevlar body armour like butter).

I wonder what kind of penalties these kids would face if caught. We should be more worried about this behaviour being a precursor to violence against humans than about the fate of the duck. Budding sociopaths often get their feet wet on cute little animals...

According to the UN constitution and international laws of war, no lethal weapon that does not make a sound when firing is permissible for use upon an enemy combatant. Thus, crossbows, compound bows and the likes are, as Tapewolf said, very illegal.

Just a tidbit of my erroneous knowledge.

Out of curiosity, where did you get that? I can't recall anything about a ban on crossbows since the Crusades a thousand years ago. I know that silenced firearms remain legal under the Law of Armed Conflict. I rather doubt that very many military units train with crossbows though...

Other than all that, i'm not sure why they had to mention the jean-wearing quality of the two other people.

Perhaps these evil "jeans" things are the new hoodies?

Personally, I think the article would have been sexier if they had stopped at the black trenchcoat dude with the crossbow, but maybe they wanted to emphasize that he had some "normal" friends. They could be anyone, you see. No waterfowl is safe so long as these jeans-wearing whities are about.  Today, it's ducks--tomorrow, the nation's children! Why... your kids could be going to school with evil duck slayers! Panic! Panic now!



Ahem. We now return you to your regularly scheduled silliness. 

[superluser]

...squashing it with a plank of wood? You have some WEIRD people over there.

Kodos: Run!  He's got a board with a nail in it!

According to the UN constitution and international laws of war, no lethal weapon that does not make a sound when firing is permissible for use upon an enemy combatant. Thus, crossbows, compound bows and the likes are, as Tapewolf said, very illegal.

Er...yeah.  That sounds a little unlikely to me, as well.  That would seem to outlaw throwing knives.  Anyways, international law concerning enemy combatants usually only applies to those part of a regular military, so I don't think that that would apply here.

[Zedd]

Now if they was shooting geese....They they really be in trouble XD

[Aridas]

Well, you gotta admit whoever pulled this off wasn't in his right mind.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_midlands/6469489.stm

[Gareeku]

Ah creme eggs...god I love those things. The Bourneville factory is just up the road from my current house

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Ah creme eggs...god I love those things. The Bourneville factory is just up the road from my current house

Ahah! So it was YOU!

[Tapewolf]

The Bourneville factory is just up the road from my current house

Ahah! So it was YOU!

Yeah.  Make with the eggs or we'll turn you in... 

[Gareeku]

I regret nothing!

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Wait a while, we'll sort that out for you.

[Gareeku]

I'm not suprised i suddenly feel a sense of impending doom.

[GabrielsThoughts]

what's a lorry is that like a big rig/eighteen-wheeler or is it more like the vans that the postal/delivery services use.

[Tapewolf]

what's a lorry is that like a big rig/eighteen-wheeler or is it more like the vans that the postal/delivery services use.

It didn't say.  'Articulated Lorry' is the usual term for the 18-wheelers.  So it could be one of those, which is most likely, but it could also be a large van like a Luton or those weird things UPS use.
Not describing the vehicle properly was a pretty daft move if they actually want to catch them 

**EDIT**
What the hell?

http://www.staffordshire.police.uk/news364.htm   [March 2004]

[Zedd]

Oh sure you might regret this day of loving the sweets Gar..Cause soon they will cause toooothh decayyyy...Heehee

[Tezkat]

Heh... come to think of it, £80k worth of chocolate represents a hefty payload and would require a fairly expensive truck. One wonders how difficult it really is to find a large vehicle with Cadbury bunnies splayed across the sides, though, assuming they haven't already repainted it or ditched the trailer. Selecting such an "interesting" target may have been a clever distraction from the vehicle theft; it seems to have been an organized, multi-person operation, after all.

Or maybe they actually are just really stupid chocoholics. 

[GabrielsThoughts]

I bet it was the Girl Scouts of America, they have to get the chocolate for their evil cookie empire somewhere.

Evidence of their forceful cookie sales can be seen here.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

I bet it was the Girl Scouts of America, they have to get the chocolate for their evil cookie empire somewhere.

Evidence of their forceful cookie sales can be seen here.

Heh. Shades of Fox in Socks.

Is anyone interested in the words used in there? I got bored, and typed them up...

[Zedd]

The burgler was seen one day..A witness sketched down of fully diagrams when he was fleeing from scene in a crazied sugar rush

[superluser]

Heh. Shades of Fox in Socks.

Er...Green Eggs and Ham.

I'd be very interested in seeing the words that they used in there.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Bit of both. I'll admit, I got confused by the references to Courtney Cox.

Cookie Crisis

I am a tan man.
  I am a buttercup. I am as sweet as can be. Please won't you buy some cookies from me?
Listen up kid I ain't got the time. Go on, bother somebody else with your rhyme.
  I'm selling cookies. Almost free. Please won't you buy some cookies from me?
I am on a diet, can't you see? And cookies are very bad for me.
Now go on, kid, just let me be. I will not buy any cookies from, uh, thee.
  Thee?
You wish that you could rhyme like me.
  They're not that expensive. So why won't you buy?
You must think that I'm a real gullible guy.
I don't want no cookies, they'll turn me to goo. I'm not gonna buy any cookies from you.
Beat it kid, I'm making lunch.
  How about some chocolate crispie crunch?
  Would you eat them with a fox?
If the fox was Courtney Cox. But since that is not the case, get the stuff on out my face.
Man, this rhyming stuff really hurts my tongue.
Hopefully it came today. The thing for which I sent away.
Yeah, it's here, now all is well. My jumbo jug of Stud's Hair Gel.
  Johnny. I'm surprised at you. For this you spent twelve ninety-two?
  That gel won't do you any good. But I bet some lemon sprinkles would!
  Would you buy a peanut swirl? Even from a little girl?
I will not buy them, not one box, I will not eat them with a fox,
not with bagels or with lox, and do not tempt me with Courtney Cox.
I will not buy a peanut swirl, I will not buy it little girl.
I want no cookies, can't you see? Now get that stuff away from me.
That was close, a clean escape. Good thing I am in such great shape.
Hey there miss, I'm Johnny B. Wanna spend the day with me?
  Sure I will. On one condition. You help me with my cookie mission.
I will not eat them, not one box, I will not eat them with a fox.
Not a crunch and not a swirl, I will not buy them, little girl,
I want no cookies, can't you see? Now go away and let me be.
  Would you eat them on a dare?
No way kid, they'll muss my hair.
This place is huge, I'll go inside, there's lots of places I can hide.
I'm a poet and I don't know it - I make a rhyme, every time.
  This one's big, and yummy too.
I am really getting sick of you.
I have to say, it's quite a day.
Feels as though I hit my head. Am I alive or am I dead?
  You're alive. Don't be afraid. These go great with lemonade.
  Would you eat them on a boat? How about in an over coat?
  Okay Johnny, whaddya say, will you buy some cookies today?
That's it kid, I've had enough, I am really sick of all this stuff.
I don't want cookies, can't you see, now get your stuff away from me.
I will not buy them not one box, I will not eat them with a fox.
I will not buy a peanut swirl, I will not buy it, little girl.
I will not eat them on a boat, with a goat, or in a coat.
You drive me nuts, it's really true, I've really had enough of you.
You've got until the count of three, to go away and let me be.
One
Two.
Thre.. Oh hey kid. Oh come on kid.
Oh man.
Oh come on kid, please don't cry, if it means that much, I'll buy, I'll buy.
  You will?
I didn't mean to make you cry, I'm really not that bad a guy.
If cookies mean that much to you. I'll buy a box, no, make that two.
  Oh thank you Johnny, you're true blue. All folks should have a friend like you.
What's with the train, you buttercup, you? I just wanted two boxes, two boxes, two!
  You've got your two boxes, but let me explain. There's a reason we're using this great big old train.
  So we pass the savings along right to you. For your lousy two bucks, you get a million. Plus two.
  Bye bye, Johnny. La la la la la
A million and two cookies. Got milk?