Stingray conspiracy! O_o

Alondro · October 20, 2006, 03:10:34 PM

ZOMG! Another one! SEE! It attacked the guy deliberately!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20061019/us_nm/life_stingray_dc_2

And what did it head for: his HEART!! It almost got him there too! How do they know where to aim?!

I'll bet they're not really stingrays... they're ALIENS!! That's how they're going to conquer us! They'll diguise themselves as stingrays and kill us one by one! D:

*throws on his foil hat and hides in the basement fallout shelter*

Zedd · October 20, 2006, 03:47:46 PM

You cant hide down there! It smells like depresstion and old cheetos down there!

Aisha deCabre · October 20, 2006, 05:04:36 PM

A STINGRAY conspiracy? Huh, after watching The Future is Wild I would think that we would get an uprising from squid instead...

Manawolf · October 20, 2006, 06:58:13 PM

I knew this would come up at some point. They got Irwin first, now they're going after others.

DigitalMan · October 20, 2006, 07:30:54 PM

You know, there's "freak accident," and then there's "f*cking ridiculous." That thing jumped out of the water, and into the guy's boat. I've seen and touched Stingrays at the zoo, I seriously don't see how they'd be remotely capable of that.

And it didn't almost get his heart, it did get his heart. According to the news, anyways. But unlike Steve, this guy didn't pull the barb out himself.

Mel Dragonkitty · October 20, 2006, 10:24:48 PM

See, you let one get away with it and pretty soon all the stingrays want to stab hearts. Like pine trees and politicians a few years back. It gets trendy.

Slavkei · October 20, 2006, 10:33:25 PM

Quote from: DigitalMan on October 20, 2006, 07:30:54 PM
You know, there's "freak accident," and then there's "f*cking ridiculous." That thing jumped out of the water, and into the guy's boat. I've seen and touched Stingrays at the zoo, I seriously don't see how they'd be remotely capable of that.

And it didn't almost get his heart, it did get his heart. According to the news, anyways. But unlike Steve, this guy didn't pull the barb out himself.

You do realize that it may have penetrated into the wall of the heart without piercing an atrium or ventricle, right? Whereas Irwin's penetrated INTO the heart itself, judging by the rapidity of his death, I'd assume ventricle.

So let's not say "LOL IRWIN DIED CUZ HE WAS STUPID AND PULLED IT OUT". Because I -will- take drastic measures.

DigitalMan · October 20, 2006, 10:47:41 PM

Well, I'd call it more an act of manliness than stupidity... but my friend and I agree those are often one in the same.

But fair enough, I won't say it. I'll gather some resources and let them say it; then you can take your "drastic measures" against a mountain of unresponsive text.

Alondro · October 20, 2006, 11:06:18 PM

*peeks from his bomb shelter* Also depends on the species of stingray. Some have venom, some don't, some have more than others. The venomous ones would cause instant cardiac arrest if they pierced the heart. Like, say, a cobra happening to bite right into the femoral vein... straight path to the heart, instant electrochemical disruption of the cardiac rhythm and death.

And like Slav said, it depends on where it pierced the heart and how deeply. If it just poked the pericardium, he'd have a good chance to survive. I doubt it made it very deep, since it was flying through the air and would have slowed quite a bit before making impact, whereas with Steve Irwin, it was in the water and able to stab with full thrashing force.

At any rate, FEAR THE STINGRAYS!! They've found our weakness!

Saist · October 20, 2006, 11:09:37 PM

something just sounds... fishy, no pun was intended, with this report. Stingrays are not aggressive creatures. For this stingray to JUMP out of the water and INTO a boat means that something was seriously wrong in the water. This report doesn't match up with existing biological reports on stingrays.

Draksaith · October 20, 2006, 11:11:46 PM

The frequency at which the universe operates must be changing...

First stingrays... Next comes monkeys I bet, Instead of flinging poo it'll be sporks with deadly accuracy...

Then all the anime in the world will be spontaneously translated into latin...

RJ · October 20, 2006, 11:15:48 PM

I saw this on the news the other night. Well... wow I suppose... maybe the stingrays are retaliating after people went around cutting the barbs off of them.

And I'm not sure, but I think the barb that killed Steve Irwin was bigger than the one that got this guy.

Alondro · October 20, 2006, 11:35:53 PM

*Steve Irwin stingray to the current stingray* My barb's bigger than yooooours is!

And je.saist... Of course it's not typical stingray behavior! THEY'RE ALIENS!!! Just like I said! *stockpiles amunition... and spearguns*

Jim Halisstrad · October 21, 2006, 03:00:38 AM

There's something fishy going on here.
I'm just too wet between the ears to figure it out though.

komissarmakarov · October 21, 2006, 03:12:00 AM

Quote from: Aisha deCabre on October 20, 2006, 05:04:36 PM
A STINGRAY conspiracy? Huh, after watching The Future is Wild I would think that we would get an uprising from squid instead...

Maybe that is EXACTLY what is happening- after all, Mafia dons hire hitmen, the US has the CIA...

King Of Hearts · October 21, 2006, 08:30:41 AM

I like stingrays...

...I think they are delicious with hot sauce and vinegar.

That is a very... VERY weird story... yet it would make for an interesting createure feature. "Attack of the killer Stigrays!"

Alan Garou · October 21, 2006, 09:41:24 PM

This is really weird. I've met rays before and they were in no way agressive. I used to go to Connecticut's Maritime Aquarium, and every six months or so they had little foot-long stingerless rays in the petting pool. They were a bit shy, but they let you pet them and didn't get scared or anything. (Their skin is slimy.) I have no clue what would cause this behavior.

Also, I'm glad I moved. I don't wanna get killed when the ray army makes landfall.

bill · October 21, 2006, 09:43:10 PM

Rays are obviously evolving. Today, heart-seeking barbs. Tomorrow, opposible thumbs.

RJ · October 21, 2006, 10:59:14 PM

Does anyone else see this becoming some sort of horror movie?

I can imagine it now: "Stingrays on a Ship!"

DigitalMan · October 21, 2006, 11:10:34 PM

No, it wouldn't be horror, it'd be action. Guess it depends on one's definition of horror, though.

"I have had it with these motherf*ckin' stingrays on this motherf*ckin' ship!"

Aisha deCabre · October 21, 2006, 11:14:34 PM

I don't think too many successful horror movies these days stem around creatures of some sort...like, movies like Jaws and The Birds did great in their time, but the creep-you-out-on-the-edge-of-your-seat-thriller-mess-with-your-mind type movies today center around the metaphysical, religious fears.

So yeah, a movie about evil stingrays would definitely be adventure.

Of course, to be really scary, they'd have to actually fly, not just swim...holy moly. o.O

Stingray conspiracy! O_o

Manawolf

DigitalMan

Slavkei

DigitalMan

Draksaith

Jim Halisstrad

komissarmakarov

King Of Hearts

Alan Garou

DigitalMan