2019-06-14 Aros!

[killpurakat]

AWESOME! When I saw Wildy was next (from the Patreon preview sketch), I wondered what she was going to be representing, and a HUUUUUGE part of me was hoping she was throwing around some Aromantic pride! And she is! 

As an Ace Aro, I can definitely relate to the struggles Amber is describing. I find people often get confused when I'm just like "I want hugs!" and don't take it further, or I mention having a crush wherein I just want to be friends with a person and nothing further (or dress them up in costumes because that's my hobby and my brain just goes "what clothing could I put them in?").

... And once again, I WANT THAT SHIRT!!! Geez, Amber would make a good fashion designer!

[Cassi-kun]

I was expecting this, given her lines in the Perfect Date arc

http://www.missmab.com/Comics/PD_09.php

True, she said there that it was possible she might start dating, but given that eleven years have passed real time, it's not too surprising she's been marked completely aro.

[LoneHowler]

I'm both Ace and Aro, when people tell me I have to get a partner I ask "why?"

[ProfesseurRenard]

"Cupid missed this Aro". They make these puns to torture us, I'm sure of it.

[KarmikCykle]

Represent!  Woo!  I signed up for the forums just so I could make this post, having finally publicly come out as pansexual aromantic this year.

[Grey Wolf]

Represent!  Woo!  I signed up for the forums just so I could make this post, having finally publicly come out as pansexual aromantic this year.

Welcome out of the closet! Sure is stuffy in there, huh?

Just a quick nit pick here... I have trouble with the idea of "stronger than platonic." I'm grayro (super-rare attraction under circumstances I don't know how to replicate plus a near inability to differentiate between romantic and platonic love), and I have had 1 yeah-that-was-a-crush in my life. My relationship with him wasn't any stronger because there was romantic attraction. Granted, I have a lot of trouble qualifying/quantifying love, but we're best friends. My love for him didn't get any weaker. It's just...different?

Given that Wildy is going to get married soon, I hope she and her partner can work it out so she doesn't get hurt

[ProfesseurRenard]

Given that Wildy is going to get married soon, I hope she and her partner can work it out so she doesn't get hurt

Wait, what? I didn't see anything about Wildy being engaged.

[Tapewolf]

Wait, what? I didn't see anything about Wildy being engaged.

1169-1170.  And it's more of an arranged marriage than her finding a sweetheart.

[ProfesseurRenard]

Wait, what? I didn't see anything about Wildy being engaged.

1169-1170.  And it's more of an arranged marriage than her finding a sweetheart.

Ah, I must have missed those pages.

[killpurakat]

Represent!  Woo!  I signed up for the forums just so I could make this post, having finally publicly come out as pansexual aromantic this year.

Welcome out of the closet! Sure is stuffy in there, huh?

Just a quick nit pick here... I have trouble with the idea of "stronger than platonic." I'm grayro (super-rare attraction under circumstances I don't know how to replicate plus a near inability to differentiate between romantic and platonic love), and I have had 1 yeah-that-was-a-crush in my life. My relationship with him wasn't any stronger because there was romantic attraction. Granted, I have a lot of trouble qualifying/quantifying love, but we're best friends. My love for him didn't get any weaker. It's just...different?

Given that Wildy is going to get married soon, I hope she and her partner can work it out so she doesn't get hurt

Platonic versus romantic is different for everyone. But here's my take on it, if it helps at all:

Someone once described it to me as platonic relationships can be everything from a casual acquaintance up to what you have with family members you really get along with. Whereas romantic relationships are more "I want to spend the rest of my life with you for always and forever" and include everything except sex (for aces that abstain from sex, at any rate, but a sexual relationship can go hand-in-hand with a romantic one).

It isn't stronger in terms of how GOOD or LASTING the relationship is. It is defined as stronger because the ways the love between the two people in it are expressed are more often, more intense (kissing versus a hug or hand holding, for example), involve emotional intimacy at a level greater than platonic friends usually display, and/or may have legal documentation to show their commitment to either other. They are stronger because the level of commitment, and acts to show that commitment, are usually much, much higher than for platonic relationships.

And PLEASE don't get confused by thinking you can only have one romantic relationship! It is VERY normal and common (despite what the neigh-sayers go on about) to have romantic relationships with friends because you are committed to them that much. Best friends usually are somewhat romantic relationships, and saying "I love you" without a sexual context to your friends is AWESOME and I hate how our society tries to say it isn't.

But it is all very confusing, and however you want to define it for yourself and your relationships is perfectly fine and valid. 

And if I may plug some comics that could help, I totally recommend the "Aces Wild" series on DeviantArt by Sally Vinter. This comic in particular may help:
https://www.deviantart.com/sallyvinter/art/Aces-Wild-36-Split-791888502

[The One Guy]

Well this one was unexpected, but not unwelcome.  I guess I was premature bringing up my situation on the thread for the page about Abel.  Fiction always tends to group romantic and sexual attraction as one and the same, which I don't really mind, as most of the time they do coincide, but it's interesting to see my particular case get represented.  Like I said in my post in Abel's thread though, I've never really faced the hardships that often come with such an orientation, in fact, I never even knew there were people out there who considered someone not being in or looking for a relationship a bad thing until reading about it.  I guess I'm just lucky.

[KarmikCykle]

People on social media and in real life make fun of me for supposedly not ever being able to get a date and I just laugh because I don't even want one.

[CelesteShamrock]

I have always enjoyed DMFA but recently the plot has been moving at a very slow pace.  Now we have a gender identity segment that seems revisionist given previous story panels featuring the characters.  Please increase the tempo of the story line and if possible truncate the orientation intermetso. 

[The One Guy]

I have always enjoyed DMFA but recently the plot has been moving at a very slow pace.  Now we have a gender identity segment that seems revisionist given previous story panels featuring the characters.  Please increase the tempo of the story line and if possible truncate the orientation intermetso.

I can understand if you find this intermission unnecessary, and the plot moving too slowly is a valid complaint even if I don't share it, but revisionist?  How so?  Abel and Jyrras have already had their orientations explored in the comic itself, and the subject has never come up for Fa'Lina or Wildy nor have they done anything to indicate that their orientation is anything other than what's stated here.

[killpurakat]

Given that it's Amber's comic and characters and that the whole thing is done for free, she CAN do whatever she wants. She wants to draw some pages for Pride month that she has been wanting to do for a few years and kept putting off because there weren't any good breaks in the story? Why the heck not?!

And none of this is rewriting anything. It's just putting it all on the DMFA website so the people who only come here (or the Katbox) get this info. And also giving some of the fans a nice shout out or heads up about what is out there, as can be seen from all the people replying to these posts going "THAT'S ME! I love being represented!" If you really want to crap on THAT, you've missed several key points and themes of the comic.

I'd rather a story that takes its time and makes me believe the characters and situations are real and heartfelt and great rather than some druk that just goes from plot point to plot point and ends because the author does it out of obligation/money/gets bored with it.

I love seeing what comes next in the comic and hope to continually be surprised, overjoyed, saddened, and all the other feels by what Amber puts out there.