[Story] Chronicles of Jakob Pettersohn (01/Jun/08 - Final chapter)

Started by Tapewolf, July 25, 2006, 06:25:59 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Gabi

I liked the idea of wolves hiding from the big bad pig.

And the descriptions too, they were very detailed and original.

And I also liked the fox. :) I wonder if we're somehow related.
~~ Gabi a.k.a. Gliynn Starseed, APF ~~
Thanks to Silver for the yappities, and to everyone for being so great!
(12:28:12) llearch: Gabi is equal-opportunity friendly

Tapewolf

#241
Chapter 33

I came to in what appeared to be some sort of dungeon.  To my mild surprise, I was dangling from the ceiling by my wrists, as were Izak and Snell.

"He's awake," said Izak.  I suddenly noticed that neither of them had wings.  Evidently the manacles were doing more than just suspending us.  Experimentally I tried to shapeshift my hand, but it wasn't happening.

"Anyone remember how we got here?" I asked.

"Not really.  Someone stunned us in the forest, I guess."

"Tell me, Snell," I said, "Do your talents extend to breaking out of enchanted manacles while suspended from the ceiling?"

"No," he admitted.

"Would you care to elaborate on what you can do?  I mean it's not like we're exactly pressed for time," I said.

"As I was saying, I realised about halfway through my course at the Academy that I could make my fortune by turning to a life of crime.  The Beings never stood a chance."

"So you took to burglary?"

"Yep.  I can pick the locks, or failing that stretch myself into something that will fit through the letterbox.  I can make myself partly invisible, or make people forget they've seen me."

"Plateau Eyes?"  I said wonderingly.

"Whatever.  I can break in at 3AM while the Beings are asleep, and ensure they don't wake up while I'm robbing them.  Or I can make them sleep if they aren't," he added.

"Sounds cushy," I said.  "What, would you say, was your worst mistake?"

"Hmmm... Oh!  That would have to be the time I accidentally robbed a succubus," he said, chuckling at the memory.  "She was living wingless with someone, pretending to be a Being.  In the commotion her husband woke up and saw her with her headwings... ooh, that was messy.  We both had to erase parts of his short-term memory.  Last I heard he wrote it off as a nightmare, but... Hey!  I may have agreed to let you interview me, but I can think of a more comfortable setting."

"Just a moment," said Izak.  "I don't think they've locked this manacle properly."
He swung around, throwing his entire weight onto one arm, and with the faint sound of metal tearing, the lock broke open leaving him suddenly suspended by the other arm.  He gave a brief cry of pain, but losing the manacle had restored access to some of his powers, and after a few minutes of concentrating upon his other wrist, the lock snapped open of its own accord and he fell three feet to the ground.

"I'm bored now," said Snell.  "How about we get out of here?"

Our suspension was not the only obstacle, however.  There was also a heavy steel door, which was firmly locked.  Izak and I both tried a variety of spells but they had shielded the lock too well for us to penetrate.
I began to rifle through my bag, looking for the set of jewellers screwdrivers which I always brought with me for calibration purposes.
"They seem to have taken my Nagra," I said angrily.

"I'll do it," said Snell, and placed a tentacle against the lock.  He closed his eyes and the tentacle seemed to vibrate as he morphed it into the guts of the lock.  Exactly two seconds later the latch clicked open.  I stared at him enviously.

About ten minutes later we found ourselves walking through a darkened room in what appeared to be an office.  Thoroughly lost, I tried to work out which way North was while Izak and Snell began to argue about which floor we were on.

"I've been expecting you," said a voice from behind us, making my blood freeze.  The lights came on to reveal a giant rat sitting behind a desk.  He spoke in a soft, cultured voice and was stroking a snow-white feral cat.  Izak stared at me in horror as I made a series of strange noises, trying desperately not to burst out laughing.

"You will be laughing on the other side of your face soon enough, Mr. Cross," he said, a sour expression crossing his features.

"Dammit," I snapped.  "How did you know that?  It's supposed to be secret."

"I know many things," he said enigmatically, and began to smile again.  Izak was looking at me as though we'd never met before.  His expression was not calm.

"YOU...?" he said, in disbelief, "You're Johan Cross?"

I covered my eyes with my hands for a moment but quickly snapped out of it because he was rapidly losing control.

"Silence!" snapped the rat.  "You have caused me a great deal of trouble with that little incident in Sandiria," he continued in his soft, purring voice.
"You have killed a number of my minions, and I shall have to punish you severely..."  He broke off when he realised that no-one was listening to him.

"I TRUSTED YOU!" Izak was screaming.  "All the films we've made, all the time we've spent together... it was all a lie, wasn't it!  I was actually being manipulated by one of the most notorious soul-murdering psychopaths this side of Zinvth!  MY OWN BROTHER!  WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!"

"I-"  Before I could reply, Izak had hurled himself at me.
"You killed cities!" he yelled, "You murdered thousands of innocent Beings!  You gave them the True Death and you even had a Being for a mother!  How did it feel eating all those souls?!  Did you get a kick out of it, eh?  Perhaps you got a kick when you imagined you were eating her soul!" he shrieked.

"You leave our mother out of this, you little shit!" I snarled murderously and punched him in the stomach.  "You didn't even stay to help her!  You ran off and almost got yourself killed taking some stupid course that you didn't even finish!"  Snell rushed to separate us, but Izak dealt him a swift left hook under the chin.
A brawl erupted, little tufts of fur going everywhere.  The rat stood up and stared at us with a look of bewilderment, uncertain what to do.  His grand evil speech was not supposed to have gone down quite like this.

What he didn't know was that I had lowered my mind-shield so that Izak and Snell could hear my thoughts.
They did likewise and we had a silent, yet urgent argument that the rat was not privy to.  While Izak didn't believe I was innocent, we were able to get him to agree - if reluctantly - that we would have to settle this later.  There was a momentary lull in the fighting, but our captor didn't seem to realise that we had switched from actual fighting to horseplay.

Reaching a decision, the rat pressed a button and a handful of guards rushed in.  Their uniform was strangely familiar, but they were still only Beings.  Snell broke into their minds and they fell asleep even as they ran.  Another followed, but as soon as he looked into the leopard's face, his eyes went funny and he wandered back out again in a state of confusion.  I'll have to learn that, I thought.

In the meantime we had edged closer and closer to the rat's desk.  He was about to hit the panic button when a tentacle streaked out towards him.  Moments later something small and white was struggling ferociously in my grasp as I began to throttle it.  Snell did not look very pleased.

"Let us go or kitty gets it," I said, smiling my Johan Cross smile.  The cat made a peculiar choking sound as I jerked my tentacles tighter around his throat for a moment and the rat stepped backwards in alarm.
Something very strange had happened to him... a pair of feathered wings.  It seemed that his cat had somehow been made into a patch.  No wonder he was always holding them.

"I'm sure we can come to some kind of... agreement..." he said nervously.  Then someone shot us from behind.

* * *

When I came to, we were lying side by side on the floor, enchanted bracers constricting our powers once again.  I glanced muzzily up at the rat who was tucking into some sandwiches.  Apparently it was his lunch break.

"Are you really Johan Cross?"  Izak whispered feebly.

"Not anymore," I replied.  "I'm sorry... I should have said... but I was too ashamed to admit it..."

"Should have realised... your absence from SAIA matched his reign...  There are 'Cubi at the Academy who worship you..." he croaked and I grimaced.  "...Aspiring to eat as many souls as you did... Why did you do it...?"

"I didn't," I whispered back.  "I went crazy for a bit when Page died, killed a couple of people who deserved it and banished loads of people who probably didn't, but I never ate anyone.  It's all rumours, and they've grown since I left.   When we get back to SAIA I'll have to try and squash these cults..."

Izak smiled weakly.  Maybe it was because he was less combat-trained than Snell or myself, but the Stun spell had affected him a lot worse than us.  I glanced back at the rat, and saw that he was finishing up.  With some effort, I stood up and eased my brother onto his unsteady feet.

"Now they shall pay, Tiddles!" our captor said, nursing the slightly-strangled cat on his desk.  "Oh yes, they shall pay!"
He looked up to face us again.  "Oh good, you're awake.  As I was saying, you have killed a number of my minions and I shall have to punish you severely..."

"How do you know it was us?" I asked.

"The recording you had," he smiled.  "My technicians have played it back and given me a precise report of all your evil deeds.  Deeds that were indeed worthy of Johan Cross."

"Get bent, demon," said Izak.  The rat looked extremely angry.

"Oh, but it is you who shall get bent, Mr. Pettersohn!" he replied with an expression of evil glee.  "Many of my people died when the Hovel was destroyed.  I lost valuable allies and agents.  It is only by good fortune that I managed to intercept you before you could reach Mundas and destroy yet more lives and property... my property..."

"What makes you think we were headed there?"  Izak asked.  He looked puzzled.

"Do you think I look like a fool?" snapped the rat, his fur puffing up in anger.  "Mundas is the nearest branch in the area after Sandiria."

"Branch?" said Snell blankly.

"Pizza Hovel," I said, suddenly realising who the rat was.  "Olivias Sadmann, I presume?"

"Have you only just realised?" he sneered.

"Never heard of you," Snell retorted.  "Then again I don't know many demons, let alone scum like you and the other ones who attacked us."  The rat looked like he was about to hit Snell.  Indeed, he probably would have done if it had not meant releasing his firm grip upon Tiddles.

"He's not one of them," I said.  "Sadmann is the president of the Pizza Hovel corporation and it seems he has a very odd way of thanking the people who risked their lives trying to save Sandiria.  But then I couldn't expect much more from someone with such close ties to the Burning Feather.  Funny that he happens to be a demon himself, isn't it?"

"Save...?" said the rat.  He glanced at a display on his desk, and then rubbed some dirt off the screen.  His attitude changed abruptly.  "Oh dear.  I'm very, very sorry," he said.  "I seem to have misread the report."

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Zedd


llearch n'n'daCorna

Oh, classic. I -love- the finishing line.

I think the horseplay was a bit telegraphed, but that may be because it's been used so many times before...

Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Tapewolf

Quote from: llearch n'n'daCorna on September 05, 2007, 04:49:51 PM
I think the horseplay was a bit telegraphed, but that may be because it's been used so many times before...

Yeah, I think it probably has been done before although I can't think of an example.  I'm tempted to rework that bit since it did seem a little contrived.

Personally my favourite bit is where Jakob holds the cat hostage (remembering that Snell is feline too).  I think that's new, although there are a number of spy spoofs which I've never seen...

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Paladin Sheppard


Gabi

This brings misunderstandings to a whole new level.
~~ Gabi a.k.a. Gliynn Starseed, APF ~~
Thanks to Silver for the yappities, and to everyone for being so great!
(12:28:12) llearch: Gabi is equal-opportunity friendly

Tapewolf

#247
Chapter 34

Some time after my disastrous attempts to film Snell for my documentary on burglary, I had been commissioned to make a film about the adventuring trade.  This was not without risk, since a good many adventurers would quite happily slay me if they ever found out what I was.
Nonetheless, it had seemed like an interesting challenge, and I now sat in the Woebegone Inn, dressed in a jerkin, bracers and various other adventuring paraphernalia while eying the other patrons with a slightly arrogant expression.

A large, black panther entered the bar.  A jaguar.  He stood out quite obviously, not least because of the wings growing out of his back.  There was a momentary lull in the conversation.  Someone evidently took objection to the newcomer, drawing a blade and striding towards him in a threatening manner, but it seemed that the stranger was used to that kind of thing and his would-be assailant was curled up on the floor before he had quite realised how it happened.

I looked at him curiously, the arrogance vanishing into a thin smile... this could be what I had been hoping for.  While the documentary required a certain amount of material about Beings, the real meat of the project was to be a study of Creatures who had decided to earn a living by the sword.

There were rumours that had reached my ears of a young lad known as Ti'Fiona, who while still in his teens, had nonetheless vanquished a number of quite formidable enemies.  There was some confusion as to what he was... some guessed him to be an Angel or a feathered Demon, while still others claimed that he was just a Being, albeit a winged one. 
Thinking of this, I shuddered... after all, I had thought the same thing myself until my headwings had appeared.  If he really was an immature incubus who was totally oblivious to his heritage, he was going to have a very nasty surprise at some point in the next few years.  It would be interesting to interview him, I mused, but he was always on the move.  He retired before I got the chance.

With a start, I turned my attention back to the present.  The panther booked a room, which pleased me greatly.  If he was going to be here for the next few days I should have a good opportunity to collar him and find out if he would consent to an interview.

He was not the only newcomer, however.  While I had been pondering over Ti'Fiona, a lithe young vixen had arrived and new stood at the bar, fetching appreciative glances and stares from the other patrons.  I was staring at her myself, but for other reasons.  There was something slightly odd about her.

I was not especially pleased when my musings were interrupted by a blow on my shoulder.
Glancing around angrily, I saw a feline novice, accompanied by an elder fox.
"Watch it," I snarled, but let it go.  Meanwhile, a husky had risen from his table and was whispering something in the vixen's ear.  She gave a sly grin and led him upstairs, amid wolf-whistles from his team-mates.

Not long afterwards, we heard the unmistakable sounds of love coming from the rooms upstairs.  Several of the other patrons snickered to themselves.  Some gave drunken cheers of approval.

"The sin of lust," muttered someone, in a voice that was far from approving.  It was the priest.  Glancing around, I realised that the novice was sitting next to me.

"Excuse me, brother," I began casually, "Do you know where I might find a warrior named Ti'Fiona?"

"Mean you Edward?" he asked, looking at me in an uneasy manner.  His eyes darted to the pair of black leather gloves I was wearing for a moment and then settled back on my face.  He didn't quite have the courage to make eye contact.
"I have heard he gave up his old life to run an inn some leagues west of here," he said.

"At so young an age?"  I asked, my brows arching in puzzlement.

"Ah, I see your confusion.  Nay, you would be thinking of his son, Daniel.  Some say that Edward himself has been kidnapped.  Myself, I know not... but if it is this Daniel that you seek, I fear you must ask another... "
I sat bolt upright as a scream of terror ripped through the air.  But looking around, no-one else seemed to have heard it.  Oh hell.

"Is something wrong, my son?" asked the novice, glancing at me in a worried manner.

"Very," I replied, and ran upstairs.

I didn't bother to open the door because I knew it would be locked.  I just ran through.  Even so, I was too late.  The succubus had assumed a feline form and she turned sharply as I barged in, ripping the lock off the door.  The soulless corpse of her prey still lay on the bed beside her.

"Put him back," I said.

"It's too late, he's dead," she sneered. 

"No it isn't.  Now put his soul back in his body, unless you want the guys downstairs to see your base form."

She stiffened as my crossbow drew level with her face.  "All right," she said.  "It's done."

"Do you think I can't tell?" I growled, squeezing the trigger and flashing my headwings into existence for a moment.  "Do it again.  Properly this time."  The feline panicked and obeyed.

"Well, there you go..." she said, not quite daring to sneer while she still ran the risk of getting a bolt through the head.  "So.  You've got a soul in a corpse.  What are you going to do with it?"

I held the crossbow with one hand, and gestured with the other.  It had been just under two minutes by my reckoning.  If I could restart his heart and lungs quickly he might just pull through.  The dead husky gave a great gasp and lay there twitching slightly as his soul gradually reintegrated with his body.  I remembered how Professor Destania used to get very, very angry when I did this in soul-stealing class.  Eventually she threw me off the module.

"You need more practice at being canid," I said.  "Walking with a feline gait is not a good way to maintain your disguise.  Other canines will notice."

"Why are you telling me this?" she replied.  "Why did you prevent me from eating him?"

"Perhaps because that would not be a very nice thing to do..." I said simply, and then smiled in a horrible way.  "...or perhaps because I figured your soul would make a more satisfying meal."  My hand glowed again, and I began to pull at the core of her very being.

"P...please..." she whimpered, and with a savage jerk I let go.  Now I was the one with the sneer.

"The prospect of oblivion frightens you, does it?  Afraid of the True Death?  Scared of being erased as though you had never been at all?  That's good..."
The succubus whimpered again, and my expression suddenly changed to one of frustration.  "...so why the hell is it okay to do that to Beings?" I burst out.  "What makes your life worth so much more than theirs that it's fine and dandy to obliterate them completely?  They are just as sentient as we are.  Some of them are smarter.  Does lifespan and magic really make our lives that much more 'valuable' than theirs?  Think on that while you jump out the window."

"What?"

"Get going.  I suppose you could stay here and be vanquished when the others arrive, but that wouldn't be my choice."

She didn't need telling thrice.  I turned to examine the husky, checking his pulse and neural activity, when I felt another mind nearby. Glancing around, I noticed the panther standing in the doorway.

"A succubus," I told him calmly, gesturing at the husky, whose breathing was still a bit ragged but slowly growing stronger.  "She managed to escape, but I did prevent her from eating his soul.  He should make a full recovery."

"You mean you let her escape," he said.  I gave him a quizzical stare, but he just kept gazing right back at me, his face inscrutable.  "Tell me... what made you come up here?" he asked.  "Just in time to save him?"

"I..."

"Save it," the panther said, with a slightly unpleasant grin, walking across the room and glancing out of the window.  "I heard every word.  You're an incubus, my lad."

Oh shit.

"Yes," I admitted.  "I am, and I did let her escape.  I believe that she has experienced a change in perspective.  If not... if I find that she is still prone to soul-murder, then... well, I may have to kill her."

The panther stared at me impassively.

"But what about you?"  I mused.  "Demons and Angels can eat souls too."

"Touché," he said.  "I shall reserve judgement upon you.  But say, why are you here?  After that little performance of yours I hardly think it was to hunt."

"Indeed no," I said.  "Actually, it was to seek the services of an adventurer such as yourself.  You see, I came here to..."

The panther went for his sword.  I raised the crossbow for a second until I realised that he wasn't aiming for me.  I spun around.  The priest and his novice were there, staring horrified at me as I crouched next to what appeared to be the corpse of my victim, covering them with the crossbow.

"Careful, my son," said the priest, "He may be evil.  I do not like the look of him."

"'Course I'm evil," I said.  "I'm wearing black gloves, aren't I?"  The priest winced as I waved my fingers at him with my unencumbered hand.  Actually what I was wearing were motorcycle gloves, but they didn't need to know that.

"Before you ask, this has nothing to with us," I said, lowering the crossbow slightly.  "The wench he took was a succubus..." at this, the priest made a strange symbol.  "Calm down, calm down.  She didn't get him."

"Truly, lust can imperil the soul..." the fox remarked.

"Whatever.  Now, of all the people who might have decided to investigate, why have you two come here?"

The priest and his novice conferred for a moment.  "Tell him," whispered the priest.  The novice looked at the floor, evidently still nervous at my presence.
"We have come to seek the services of an adventurer such as yourself.  You see, we came here to..."

"Are you taking the piss?" I exclaimed, staring back at him.  Oh.
Sneaking a quick glance at the panther for a moment, I turned back to the novice with an apologetic look.  "I'm very sorry," I said, "I thought you were talking to me..."

"He is," said the elder priest.  "But actually I think the both of you would be most suitable."

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Zedd

Most intresting my dear friend.. Hope to see more  :3

Fuyudenki

Chronicles is still going?  I thought you'd ended it and moved to Future History.

Anyway, having read chapters 1-13 at this point, I shall be brutally honest.(in as friendly a tone as possible, of course.)

Obvious Mary Sue-ism, contrived circumstances, and deviates heavily from established DMFA backstory(which admittedly may not have been established at the time it was written), and the characters don't respond quite believably in the human world.(at least, IMO.)

Despite all this, however, it still keeps me coming back for more.  Not because I think "This could get better.  maybe the next one will be better."  The story really is quite interesting.

I wouldn't reccomend editing for the complaints I outlined above, as it would fundamentally change the story beyond all recognition.  Good job! :cheers

Tapewolf

Quote from: Raist on September 27, 2007, 10:54:16 PM
Chronicles is still going?  I thought you'd ended it and moved to Future History.
I'm thinking of it, but I keep getting new ideas to explore.  It's definitely off the boil, though.  (That said, I am far from happy with the current FH chapter, hence it is late)

QuoteObvious Mary Sue-ism, contrived circumstances, and deviates heavily from established DMFA backstory(which admittedly may not have been established at the time it was written), and the characters don't respond quite believably in the human world.(at least, IMO.)

In my defence, the Jakob Pettersohn series was the first story I'd written since school, so we're talking a gap of 13 years.  In other words, I began writing before I knew what 'Mary Sue' actually meant.  There are a number of things which I wouldn't have done now, and despite my best efforts, Jakob has become more powerful than he should have done.

I'd be interested to know about the backstory deviations, though... I can't think of any offhand.  I can usually find a workaround  >:3

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


llearch n'n'daCorna

mwahahaha.

"are you taking the... oh" ;-]


I can't wait to find out what all of them are actually there for. So far we have the panther, who hasn't said anything other than him being an Adventurer. We've got Jacob, who hasn't told the panther what he's there for, although he started. And we've got the priest and the novice... who also haven't managed to finish their sentences.

Just -asking- for trouble, that lot is. But then, Jakob is pretty much always in trouble....
Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Gabi

Nice chapter! I guess the fox was right about lust being able to imperil the soul. And I liked the black gloves remark.
~~ Gabi a.k.a. Gliynn Starseed, APF ~~
Thanks to Silver for the yappities, and to everyone for being so great!
(12:28:12) llearch: Gabi is equal-opportunity friendly

Tapewolf

Quote from: llearch n'n'daCorna on September 28, 2007, 07:33:52 AM
So far we have the panther, who hasn't said anything other than him being an Adventurer.

He's just an itinerant adventurer who happens not to be a Being.
Jakob is looking for Creature adventurers to film in the same a'la Snell.  In fact, this is supposed to be part of the same documentary series... a sort of careers video for 'Cubi. 
The priests are looking for an adventurer or two for a job.

Quote from: Gabi on September 28, 2007, 08:44:22 AM
Nice chapter! I guess the fox was right about lust being able to imperil the soul. And I liked the black gloves remark.
Thanks.  The black gloves thing was inspired partly by one of my father's comments about  Doctor Who - Seeds of Doom where the evil millionaire type is always wearing them.  He was actually wrong there, the gloves were a plot point, but it always stuck with me.  I must admit it was one of my favourite lines in the chapter, though.

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


llearch n'n'daCorna

Quote from: Tapewolf on September 28, 2007, 09:06:20 AM
Quote from: llearch n'n'daCorna on September 28, 2007, 07:33:52 AM
So far we have the panther, who hasn't said anything other than him being an Adventurer.

He's just an itinerant adventurer who happens not to be a Being.
Jakob is looking for Creature adventurers to film in the same a'la Snell.  In fact, this is supposed to be part of the same documentary series... a sort of careers video for 'Cubi. 
The priests are looking for an adventurer or two for a job.

The point is not what they're actually up to - -we- know they're looking. -They- don't. All three of the groups/individuals are standing around waiting to find out what the others one. That's gotta be stressful.

Notwithstanding that, the job that Jakob and the panther are being hired for... we don't have any idea what it is. "Hunt Down That Evil Johan Cross And Kill Him" ?
Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Tapewolf

Quote from: llearch n'n'daCorna on September 28, 2007, 10:34:22 AM
The point is not what they're actually up to - -we- know they're looking. -They- don't. All three of the groups/individuals are standing around waiting to find out what the others one. That's gotta be stressful.

Ah.  My reply was mostly about the the panther and Jakob, since it looked like speculation about things which didn't need it.  I included the priests for completeness.

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


llearch n'n'daCorna

-Everything- needs to be speculated about.

Why else would you be posting the story here? ;-]


Slightly more seriously, the job that the priest and the novice want the two of them to accomplish has a number of possibilities to come. And... if Jakob can detect Cubi in action (as seems likely, from their point of view) then they're going to want to hire him for something to do with Cubi.

In which case, my earlier, slightly off-the-cuff response might well be likely... ;-]
Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Tapewolf

llearch, for your information, the story server does not like mac-formatted text and crams the entire story into the title  >:3

It seems to have taken a dislike to the word 'touché' as well, although that's a problem I can live with...

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


llearch n'n'daCorna

Ooo.

Erm. That's probably the mac line endings, which are neither CRLF nor LF. I think.

I noticed the Touche thing, and was going to look into it when I got home. After I put my son to bed, or something.

Thanks for the bugrep, though. ;-]
Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Tapewolf

QuoteErm. That's probably the mac line endings, which are neither CRLF nor LF. I think.
I think it might be just CR.

QuoteI noticed the Touche thing, and was going to look into it when I got home. After I put my son to bed, or something.
I suspect it's a unicode character in UTF-8 form.

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Tapewolf

#260
Chapter 35

"I'm sorry," I said.  "You must have mistaken me for someone else.  I'm not for hire."

"I have heard otherwise," said the priest.  "Indeed, we know the tales of your valour... you brought about the arrest of the infamous Johan Cross when he appeared in Northwell Mansion in the guise of a white Alsatian dog..."

Paladin will love that version of events, I thought dryly.

"That happened many years ago," I laughed.  "I'd have been about twelve..."

"Not, if as I suspect, you are a Creature," he pointed out. 
"You see, my son, I told you he was evil," he added to the novice as I stopped smiling.

"Yes, I was... involved in that," I said reluctantly.  "But it doesn't mean I'm actually up for hire right now.  In fact, I got dragged into that particular encounter... it wasn't an adventuring job in the normal sense of the word."

He didn't look like he was going to take 'no' for an answer so I paused, choosing my words carefully.  "Hypothetically speaking, what sort of a mission are you thinking of?"

The priest stopped smiling himself now, and nudged the novice.
"We need you to... kill Charline," he said reluctantly.  My jaw dropped. So did the crossbow, which promptly embedded a bolt in the wall.  Even the priest looked terrified.

"No!" he said frantically. "No!  Not that mission... the other one!"

"Oh!" said the novice, cheering up slightly.  "Right. We are members of the Order of Saint Kelnar..."

"Never heard of him."

"He was a great man, a fox who came to study at the library in our city.  During his stay he performed many miracles including the slaying of the pigs, turning the miser's gold into lead, and raising a child who had drowned from the grave.  And at great risk to his life and soul, he drove out a great horde of Demons, Angels and Incubi when they tried to attack the city..."

"Has it occurred to you that he was most likely an incubus himself?"  I asked, with a smile.  The priest bared his teeth, but did not comment.

"Anyway, our then-King Zachamiar the Just decreed that a temple be raised to honour his great deeds in saving the kingdom.  Until he left, our founders dedicated their lives to learning and preserving all his teachings, that we may strive to follow his example.
"Our order grew in numbers and tithings, until it began to rival the might of the King himself.  This does not sit well with our present ruler, King Ordros, and his soldiers were sent to plunder the temple..."

The priest took over the story.  "They took our most holy relics," he snarled.  "And we seek an adventurer, a most skilled thief, to retrieve them."  He slapped something down on the chest of drawers by the door.  It looked for all the world like a shopping-list.

"Let me get this straight," I said incredulously.  "You want us to rob the King?  Forget it!  I'm not interested in getting my head stuck on a pole."  The priest looked crestfallen for a few moments - then his expressison hardened.

"As I said, we have great need of your skill," he began.  "Much as I do not wish to have to resort to anything quite as crude as blackmail, it is a definite option.  Think what those downstairs might believe if they saw you standing over their friend!"

To my horror, there was a whirring sound as the novice whipped out a camera and took a photo.  It was a recent machine, one of the indigenous copies of the Polaroid system from Earth.  I considered my options.  If I were to transmute some of the air next to him, the gamma flux would fog the film, but it would probably kill him too and that was something I did not want.  In any case, it was too late now as the film was already developing.

"You don't want me, you want Snell!" I said.  "He's the master thief, not me..."

"We couldn't find him," piped up the novice.  No surprise there, I thought darkly, he's spent the last two centuries perfecting his disappearing act.  And I'd disappear too if I knew what these loonies wanted.  Perhaps I should have done, but I was morbidly curious.

"Isn't this one of your feathers?" the priest added, proffering something small and only a slightly darker grey than my fur.  It was around this point that I started to wonder whether the word 'evil' meant the same thing to the priest as it did to me.  Perhaps it as some strange codeword for 'creature'.

"Very well," I said, a heavy sigh of defeat, "I can't make any promises, but I'll see what I can do."

"But you wanted the two of us though, didn't you?" asked the panther, whose expression had become curious when he'd learned the priests' affiliation.  "Since is a pious cause, count me in as well."

"Excellent, my children!" the priest exclaimed, and giving us a small quantity of coins each for expenses, left with the novice.  As they wandered back to the bar, I heard him discussing 'that mission' again.
"For Charline, we will need someone evil.  But not too evil... we do not want them to join her cause, or take her place..."

I made the sign of the cross for whatever poor sod they might find to feed her with. 

* * *

We made our way through the forest, towards the capital city.  We spoke little, save to learn each others names, since the forest was home to a number of outlaws and we did not wish to attract undue attention to ourselves.  Nonetheless, the silence between us felt unnatural and oppressive.  Our luck had held so far, but I didn' want to be the one to spoil it.  In the end it was Zivan who broke the silence.

"Who is Charline, anyway, Jakob?" he asked.

"You don't know?"  I returned, slightly bemused.

"I'm asking, aren't I?"

"Very well.  She's a succubus," I replied.  "A succubus gone bad."

"How bad?  I have heard most evil tales of one called 'Destania'..."

"Well, Professor Destania just wants to teach people murder, torture, rape and soul-eating..."

"'Just' soul-eating?"

"...Whereas Charline wants to eat the souls of everyone in the world or something.  Given the choice, I'd probably choose the Professor.  It's a bit like deciding whether you'd rather be hanged or beheaded, but at least she looks cute."

We were approaching the realm when a crossbow bolt slammed into the tree in front of us.

"Hands in the air," said a voice from the trees in the rough direction it had come from.  I looked around, but the panther had vanished into the shadows.

"What are you after?"  I asked, raising my hands.

"Your money," replied the voice, belonging to a feline, apparently a Being.  Emerging, he stood in front of me with a sword in his hand and behind him, a ferret was reloading his crossbow.

"Now then... be a good little doggy and hand over the money.." he repeated.  With a sigh I reached for my pocket, when something big and heavy knocked me to the ground.  Zivan had sprung down from the trees like his feral cousins.

Amazed, the ferret fumbled with the bolt.  By the time he had recovered, the cat was in the way, engaging in a deadly game of swordplay.  It didn't take a genius to see that they were playing for keeps.

I gave a gasp of horror as the cat feinted and made a quick diagonal slice, breaking through the panther's guard and slashing his exposed belly.  The outlaw's expression soon changed as his victim ignored the death stroke.  Unable to believe it his guard dropped for a second and he died as the panther's blade pierced his heart.

"Oh my gods, you killed him," I whimpered, kneeling by the cat and staring down at him, a pathetic expression of shock in his dying eyes.  I don't know if he ever realised that his opponent could harden his skin on demand.

"You... you'll regret that," the ferret snarled at Zivan, catching the sword his friend had dropped and wielding it himself.  His face was contorted with rage.  "...you'll apologise to him... in person!"
He made a graceful leap and launched a blow that might have severed the Angel's head if I hadn't opened fire with my own crossbow, taking him in the shoulder and ruining his stroke.  The panther reacted quickly, slashing his throat and causing me to vomit.  I tried to keep my face from straying to his blood-soaked form, and instead laid a hand upon the cat's features, gently closing his eyes.

Now there was but one bandit left, a young wolf who tried to run, only to trip in a rabbithole.  Before he could get up the panther was on him, sword at his throat.  The kid knelt there, begging for quarter.  Unsure what to do with him, we decided to bind his hands and take him with us into the town.

"No," I said, as the panther made to leave.  He turned around.
"We have to bury them," I said.  Zivan looked taken aback, but there was a hard edge to my voice and he did not argue.

It was some hours later when we finally entered the town.  The wolf was arrested, and despite my protests and pleas for clemency, he was later executed in the square.  I did not stay to watch.

* * *

Not long after we found ourselves in another inn.  In the morning we would have to start planning our mission, but for now we just needed to rest after the journey.  I was still cut up about the encounter we'd had in the forest.

"Well, at least they are all together again," I said dully.  "The bandits, I mean..."
Why hadn't we just turned the wolf loose?  He could have lived, could have started anew and made something useful out of his life.  Now his body lay in an unmarked grave.  His head would follow a few days later.

"Speaking of which, you didn't do very well against them," Zivan commented idly.  "What were you going to do... pay them?"

"Yes," I replied in a surprised voice.  He started and looked me up and down, trying to decide if I was taking the piss.

"You would hand over your money?  To them?  Just like that?  What kind of an adventurer are you?"

"I'm not one at all," I said.  "I'm just doing research."

"On what?  Getting mugged?" he replied.  "Come on.  Why are you out here with me?"

"Well, as you may remember, I wasn't given an awful lot of choice in the matter,"
I pointed out.  "I'll admit I could have split by now.  Their hold over me vanished the moment I walked out the door.  But I'm tagging along with you because you could be worth a lot of money to me."  He stiffened.
"Not like that," I added hastily.  "I'm researching a documentary about Creatures who have decided to take up the life of an adventurer, examine the pro's and cons.  In effect, a careers video for the Succubus and Incubus Academy."

"An intriguing prospect," he said, "but one that must wait until after our mission is done."

"Mmm," I agreed.  "Now, how are we going to do this?"

"I haven't the faintest idea," he said, and put his head into his hands.



Thanks to Charles and Charline.  And Keaton for inspiring the darker sections...

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Gabi

There's something odd about hearing someone tell Jakob to be a 'good little doggy'.
~~ Gabi a.k.a. Gliynn Starseed, APF ~~
Thanks to Silver for the yappities, and to everyone for being so great!
(12:28:12) llearch: Gabi is equal-opportunity friendly

Tapewolf

Quote from: Gabi on October 21, 2007, 11:48:30 AM
There's something odd about hearing someone tell Jakob to be a 'good little doggy'.
Comparing someone to their animal counterpart is likely considered a big insult (remember Merlitz and the Human).

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


llearch n'n'daCorna

Nice. And the darker sections put a highlight on the story as a whole, I think. You need a little shadow to brighten the light, as it were...
Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Zedd


Alondro

So, Charline's trying to eat everyone's souls, eh?  That sounds like something she'd be doing.  Yup.   :3

Mean ol cubi lioness.
Three's a crowd:  One lordly leonine of the Leyjon, one cruel and cunning cubi goddess, and one utterly doomed human stuck between them.

http://www.furfire.org/art/yapcharli2.gif

Tapewolf

Writer's block R us.

Chapter 36

I stared at Zivan.  It wasn't just the magnitude of our task which had upset him, he was genuinely distressed.

"What's the matter?"  I asked him.  After his scoffing at my refusal to fight, it seemed unthinkable that he would feel any remorse - hardened warrior that he was - but nonetheless, something was eating at him.

"Was it the kid?" I asked.

"Yes," he sighed.  "I didn't know they executed minors here..."

"Come on," I said softly, "What's done is done.  We can't bring him back.  It's horrible, but there's nothing we can do.  We have to put it behind us and carry out the mission."

"I guess you're right," he sighed.  "So, what do we need to do?"

"Gather information," I replied.  "Find out a way to get in, get around and take back what we need before they know what's happened."

* * *

Disguised as a beggar I sat by the side of the road, watching casually as a griffin-cart drew up to the rear entrance of the castle.  The realm was very backward, the King having a loathing of modern technology, and it had not been difficult for the griffins' union to impose a ban on all motorized vehicles.  The driver of this cart was a merchant, a guild-member who would bring supplies to the palace via the tradesman's entrance.

In the guard's mind I could see that he arrived every Monday at about 10am.  This would be very useful.
Behind me, another guard was approaching, about to move me on.  I looked up at him and his eyes unfocused.
It was a little trick Snell had taught me... modifying the surface thoughts before they could be committed to memory.  Obvious in hindsight, although it would take some practice to be as proficient at is as Snell was.  So far I could only make it work with the mind in a certain state, and of course it would never work on a shielded mind.  The guard ignored me and walked past.

That night I entered the dreams of the merchant.  One possibility was to prevent him from waking, and to steal his identity for a day.  In his clothes and form I could take the griffin-cart into the castle myself, but things would be ill for him if I made a mistake and angered the palace.  I wasn't sure I wanted to risk another head in the square next to the kid's.  Gently nudging his dreams to the morning's delivery, I saw where he went, and from this I was able to sketch out a map of the back entrance, at least as far as the kitchens.

Entering the dreams of some guards helped flesh things out still further.  I found the mind of one who patrolled inside the castle itself, and thus built up a plan of the interior, as well as I could remember it. 

Meanwhile, Zivan had not been idle.  On the pretence that he was doing a study of religions, he managed to obtain some rather interesting information.

The official faith of the realm was Ronakism, and in keeping with the realm it was extremely harsh and puritanical.  The sole exception to this was the day on which it was held that their god, Ronak the Creator, rested after creating the material universe.  Hence, the faithful would hold wild orgies every sabbath while their god was not watching.

Asking about the Order of St Kelnar brought forth a stream of propaganda which the panther positively lapped up.  It seemed that King Ordros had a particular hatred or jealousy reserved for that order, and he had in fact commanded a special celebration on the success of the raid.  Some of the choicest treasures which he had managed to liberate would be placed upon public display for the whole of the sabbath.

"Well, I think it's good as a backup plan," he said, "but I still want to take on the palace."

"Are you nuts?"  I replied, aghast.  "You want to take on the most heavily-fortified building in the realm?  And then come back to steal the rest, assuming the celebration even still goes ahead after whatever happens during our attack?  Assuming that we're both still alive, come to that?"

"Yes," he said, and the steely edge to his voice left no room for any doubts.

* * *

The passageway was some kind of underground river, ending with a dock.  It may have become hidden as the castle was expanded and rebuilt over time, or it may have been part of the original design.  Either way, it was long-forgotten and the only people who remembered it were the King and his advisors, who viewed it as a secret escape route, and the few guards posted to thwart any potential intrusion were the concealed entrance somehow rediscovered.  It was through the dreams of one such guard that I uncovered its existence, although the entrance took some finding as the season had changed since last he had been there.

I was still not happy about the approach we were taking, but Zivan had been most insistent.  What finally won me over, albeit grudgingly, was the realisation that we wouldn't be able to get all of the treasures we needed.  The ones scheduled for display had already been moved to another location, but the rest remained in the vault.  Best to try and take those by stealth first.

Alas, we bungled the entrance... a loose footfall knocked a stone off the docks and into the water with a splash.  Fortunately there was only one guard on duty at the time, a raccoon whom we managed to subdue before he could call for help.  Zivan rushed to him, and prepared to end his life.

"No... more... killing!" I spat, pushing the angel aside.  "Have you forgotten the wolf so quickly?"

"But he was only a kid," Zivan pointed out angrily, picking himself up.

"Compared to us, so is he!" I pointed at the raccoon.  "Anyway, he's only doing his job!"

"...which just so happens to include killing us," he shot back.

"Fine," I said, wrapping one of my tentacles around the raccoon's throat and squeezing.  He clawed at it for a few moments and then slumped to the ground.  As he did so, I relieved him of his weapons.  "Happy?"  I asked.  "Or do you want to kill an unarmed, defenceless man?"  The panther simply glowered back at me. 

"Look," I pointed out.  "If he doesn't report back he's going to be missed and then we'll have the whole damned castle searching for us.  What we need to do is this."

I shook the guard awake.  He promptly found himself staring into the cold eyes of an incubus, which did not sit well with him.  Covering his mouth to prevent him from screaming, I bored into him, eating his fear and erasing the last three minutes from his mind.  When it was over I used Snell's trick to prevent him from seeing us, and led him shakily back to the point he had been guarding.  Silently we slipped behind him, disappearing before the last of my holding spells could wear off.  We were inside the castle.

As we snuck around the corridors, it amused me to think that I was now breaking into the palace of an evil despot in much the same way that a young weasel Being had broken into mine some centuries past.  As I remembered what had happened to him, a sudden thought struck me.  If the King is a Creature, we're dead.  I kept it to myself.

We headed first to the vault, to make sure that the dreams I had seen were true, and not fantasy.  It was not uncommon for a person to dream, for example, of a secret door in their home or place of work that they had never opened before, and it was not always possible for a 'Cubi to tell if what they were seeing was real or pure imagination unless they were familiar with the person or the place of which they dreamt.

"Well, it was an off-chance," the angel said unhappily as he probed the lock.  By the sound of it he had been hoping they'd forgotten to lock it or something.  I tried a few spells, and even the tentacle-morphing trick of Snell's, but it was no use - we were going to have to get the key itself if we wanted to get in.

The sound of footsteps made me panic for a moment, but it was just a regular patrol and we managed to conceal ourselves.  I was still amazed that we had got as far as we had without interception, especially given the Angel's affinity for light magic.  Were he a demon, he would be at home with the darkness, even able to vanish into the shadows.  As it was, we relied largely on my concealment abilities and the shadows in the deeper parts of the castle.  Things would get trickier as we approached the higher floors, since it was about quarter to ten in the morning and the sun was high in the sky.

"Can we break into it?"  Zivan asked, for what seemed like the seventh time.

"No, we'll need the key.  For all the King's loathing of technology, that's a damn fine piece of locksmithing.  It's binary coded and we'll need a punchcard with just the right pattern of holes in it.  And before you ask, there are eighteen billion billion combinations, so no, we cannot brute-force it."

His face fell.  "And the King has the keycard, doesn't he?" he added.

"I think he does.  Fortunately for us, he should still be in bed."

"Are you mad?"

"Says the person who seems obsessed with retrieving treasure for some kook religion!  But yes, if my information is correct he will still be asleep.  And if we hurry, I think we can keep it that way."

* * *

King Ordros, a somewhat overweight Dalmatian, lay snoring in a sumptuous four-poster bed.  I gazed wistfully at his still form... it would be so easy.  Just a quick jerk of his soul and he would die peacefully in his sleep.  Remembering the harsh laws he had enacted, that was probably far better than the fat bastard deserved.  Still, those would be easy to fix once I had taken his place.  We were both canid so even the body-language would not be a problem.  Once the body was safely disposed of, no-one need ever know that the King had died...

Shaking my head, I drew myself back to the present.  From what I had learned, the King's habit was to sleep until around ten, when his chief advisor would come to wake him.  This would not now happen since that particular advisor had been stunned, tied up and stuffed in one of the many cupboards in his bedchamber.

As I used my powers to make the King's sleep deeper and keep the guards posted outside in a state of mild stupification, Zivan hung a 'do not disturb' sign outside the door, which I magically locked to make things easier.  Then the pair of us were free to begin sacking the room in earnest, notwithstanding that we were still trying to keep things as quiet as possible.  The panther went into raptures of delight over a set of small statues which he had found in a sock drawer, but the motherlode was in one of his robes, a wooden keycard with a combination set into an eight-by-eight grid.

He gave a muted whoop of delight, and as he did so knocked an exquisite porcelain vase onto the fireplace.

The King waxed wroth.

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


llearch n'n'daCorna

Oh, you just -love- ending your chapters on short sentences, don't you? ;-]
Thanks for all the images | Unofficial DMFA IRC server
"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Dannysaysnoo

And so the first chapter of CJP is released in my lifeline.

Brilliant, just can't get enough.

GabrielsThoughts

it seemed like a shorter chapter than usual, but I don't read as often as the others.
   clickity click click click. Quote in personal text is from Walter Bishop of Fringe.