[Writings] Yugo's House

Started by Yugo, October 02, 2008, 08:51:35 PM

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Yugo

I guess I'm posting a topic here for writing. Keaton made me do it!  :U
In all seriousness though, I'll be happy to throw in random stuff that I come up with in here. I'm not really that great of a writer, but I enjoy it so, hey. When I can get my recording stuff working, I'll make a music thread. But until then, there's this.

The Index
Some of this stuff might actually get longer than one page (wow!), but that probably won't be until I actually get some ideas rolling in my brain. Until then, I'll throw down little tidbits here and there.

September '08
Finding the Jyraneth
Rating: PG-13: Torture, bad language.
Synopsis: Elenor has a little chat with a Kamei'sin prisoner.
https://www.weasyl.com/~boximus<br /><br />My Weasyl!

Yugo

#1
Finding the Jyraneth (Posted the right story this time! Yay!

Many unfortunate souls had passed through the ornately carved wooden arch to be bound and forced to stare at the last thing they would know before they lost their sanity, and their soul: the beautiful succubus standing at the edge of the room, staring into nothingness, her mind swirling this way and that with thoughts of vengeance and confusion. She stood tall, power and confident in her stature, her eyes icy blue daggers, behind which lurked a storm of rage and anger locked beneath a steel fortress of focus and self control. A figure bound to a stone slab behind her stirred, groaning in pain. A half-smile curled up on the succubus' lips as she turned into the light, her body casting dark shadows in the dimly lit room. She was clad in a tight-fitting black dress, hanging down to the floor over her lithe and supple body. Her fur was stark white, feathered headwings rippling slightly as she slowly stepped from the darkness, one arm resting beneath her chest, another cupping her chin in thought.

She brushed her dress idly as she crossed over to the interrogation slab, set into the ground with dark metal stanchions, bound and enchanted with magic to prevent any undue magical escape. The heretic incubus calling himself Victor was chained there, squirming slightly as fear and realization of his dire straits set in. The succubus smirked, finding his fear to be quite palatable. The incubus' black fur was matted and bloody, but he would live long enough to suit her needs, she had made sure of that. She made no effort to hide her pleasure at his fear and pain, as it was after all, her very meat and drink. "Good to see you awake dear," she said in a lilting, sing-song voice. The incubus suddenly remembered: The Darkness. Tentacles from the shadows. Oh gods, I'm going to die, thought, struggling vainly against his bonds. He noticed a clan marking on the woman's neck, a curious slash and mark. "Death to you and your clan, Jyraneth scum!" the incubus managed to choke out, realizing just whose capitivity he was in.

"Ah, you're a fighter," she said, pulling close to his face, a leering smile painted there. "Good. It's never any fun when they have a broken soul." She circled around him, that damned smirk still on her face. "I'll tell you nothing! I'll never break my covenant," the incubus shouted, rivulets of blood running down his face. The succubus bared her teeth, bringing her face menacingly close. "I know." Her wings began to shift, tentacles with vicious snapping heads dancing about her. One of them slipped around her victim's neck, cutting off his voice, as the others began to part the fur on his head, merging into his skin and into the skull and mind beyond. She was fully aware of the potential repercussions of mind reading, but she had centuries of training and practice. The incubus would never give into physical or mental torture. She had already pushed him to the brink and beyond.

Slowly, through the hours, she whittled away at his mental defenses, a gentle mental prod here and there at specific weak points, until finally, both his mind and sanity unravelled. Gently, she peeled away the last overlying defense, similar to peeling a fruit, unwilling to damage the sweet flesh beneath. She then set to work at the slow, and deliberate scouring of his mind, flaying apart his memories one by one, even memories the incubus himself could not remember. Tiny bits of overheard conversation by clan superiors, glimpses at papers and communiques that he had not remembered. There, like pieces of a puzzle, came what she was looking for. Names of known Jyraneth survivors. Coughing, she withdrew her tentacles, blood running from her nose and mouth.

"Why thank you for your candour, dear," she said in a dry cracked voice, unable to keep her fatigue from it. The incubus had messed himself in fear, and was now viisbly shaking and shuddering, doing anything to get away from the nightmares in his vision. "Gods, what have you done to me!?", he shrieked. The succubus sighed, glad for the knowledge that her hours of work had given her. "Nothing that need concern you now, dear," she growled, a vicious smile on her face, and with that, pulled his screaming soul from his body and devoured it. She ran a pink tongue over black lips, as if savoring the flavor of a delicious meal, the ephemeral taste of the incubus strong in her mind. Now only one thing mattered: finding her kin. And she would start the first of her list.
 
Katherine Beatrix Jyraneth. 
https://www.weasyl.com/~boximus<br /><br />My Weasyl!

llearch n'n'daCorna

#2
"Many unfortunate souls had passed through the ornately carved wooden to be bound"
... ornately carved wooden what?

You might also want to look at breaking up the conversation, rather than embedding it in the middle of a paragraph like that.


Other than that, deliciously evil. I liked it.
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"We found Scientology!" -- The Bad Idea Bears

Yugo

Arch. A wooden arch. Thanks for pointing that out.  :mowcookie And double thanks for liking it. :D
https://www.weasyl.com/~boximus<br /><br />My Weasyl!

Tapewolf


J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Yugo

I'm sorry it's not your thing Tape. Maybe I can write something a little less grim soon. (I'm really hoping I can, honestly, I haven't had any happy ideas for a couple weeks now.)
https://www.weasyl.com/~boximus<br /><br />My Weasyl!

Tapewolf

Quote from: Yugo on October 03, 2008, 10:24:57 AM
I'm sorry it's not your thing Tape. Maybe I can write something a little less grim soon. (I'm really hoping I can, honestly, I haven't had any happy ideas for a couple weeks now.)

Yeah, well, as I mentioned in the Keaton thread, I have something of a problem with soul-eating.  Killing a character, fine.  Killing them slowly and horribly, whatever floats your boat.  Erasing them from existence for evermore?  That's a bit too much for me and it's something that if you are going to do at all, you want to do it sparingly.  It makes an awesome threat, though.  Implying it's happened is about as far as I'd go myself, though a trick I use a lot is some kind of lucky escape.  Either way, I've had a really bad day, so seeing someone get the True Death was really not helping :rolleyes

One trick I learned from Shakespeare is that if you are going to do something very horrible (e.g. murdering the King in Macbeth) you want to follow it up with something to lift the mood.  I'm really not sure if there is something cheery enough to balance against someone having their soul destroyed, but anyway.

Anyway, good luck, and here's hoping that you can find a less gruesome plotline.  I'll keep watching.

J.P. Morris, Chief Engineer DMFA Radio Project * IT-HE * D-T-E


Yugo

I'll be sure to keep that in mind. Looking at it now, I can see what you mean, though. I think that was a bit much, now that I read it all through.
https://www.weasyl.com/~boximus<br /><br />My Weasyl!

Sunblink

Hey, I still love this story. But I'm pretty disillusioned to most fictional things... ;)

Elenor's a great character. I still can't believe you haven't written in a long time, since your writing style is excellent. Awesome work.

However, I do agree with the notion that you should write something a bit happier, if only because I want to see more stuff from you. :B