Chicken Thread!

Started by ZacAttac21, December 13, 2016, 05:57:02 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Print
Go Down Pages1
User actions

ZacAttac21

December 13, 2016, 05:57:02 PM
In honor of our dear Merlin, I give you: The Chicken Thread! Let's see a few of my favorite chicken videos to start us off:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oUE9j8TD6kU
https://youtu.be/MKKN0lAlATQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D35uQCtr4EY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bMttomOPIsE

Merlin

#1
December 14, 2016, 03:55:31 AM
Those videos are greattttt I need a xylophone for my hens... except they make enough noise already.

But hey. POST PICTURES OF MY CHICKENS YOU SAY


Wendy and the black hen (don't blame me, my old neighbours gave them their names). They're not hecka photogenic because they move too fast. Jerks. They're good layers and like to try to eat my pants. That's not a typo, though they do destroy my plants as well.


Professor Bokbugawk, best hen. She is large and in charge, and makes the most horrible noises early in the morning sometimes just because, for hours on end if you let her. She has one angry eyebrow and one sad eyebrow, and sometimes she has to go in chicken jail (an esky in the closet) because of the aforementioned horrible noises


Here is the girls facing off with my housemate's cat (Jasper)


Here is Jasper seconds before being rescued from the Professor. She is always out to get him and he never learns to keep an eye on her.

I'll try to scrounge up some pictures of my old rooster Gunther. He used to think he was in charge, but was beat up by the Professor on a daily basis. Now he lives on a farm. That's not a euphemism, I gave my cock away to a strange girl in a supermarket parking lot.

ZacAttac21

#2
December 14, 2016, 04:33:54 AM
Sounds like a real bunch of characters. xD

Merlin

#3
December 14, 2016, 05:27:54 AM Last Edit: December 14, 2016, 05:29:31 AM by Merlin
Right! I found some old pictures of Gunther and his girlfriend Fluffybuns. I don't have either of them anymore, they both went to the farm together.



Fluffybuns has the softest feathers, and is the sweetest little hen. However, she is also as thick as two short planks. She loves Gunther more than anything, she becomes very upset if she is separated from him. So my house is sort of placed longwise on my lot, which kinda divides the yard into two sections. Not a real division, there's no gate, it just comes around two sides of my house and the back. What would happen all the time is that Gunther and Fluffybuns would wander off from each other, and Fluffybuns would look around and discover she couldn't see Gunther anymore. And she would wail. She would absolutely cry and carry on. And then Gunther would hear her, and become very upset because his lady was upset!! And he would start screaming and hopefully eventually they would find each other again, otherwise I would have to go out there and yell at them for being idiots.



So Fluffybuns, super, super dumb. Gunther makes her look like an utter genius, because being a rooster, he is about as smart as a box of hair. One time I saw him get caught in a corner of the yard. Yes, just a corner, he was not blocked in, he just kept turning right, seeing a wall, turning left, seeing another wall... and repeat. As a Polish roo, he has a big shock of feathers on his head, and when he was younger it was more of a hen-style sort of crest, very fluffy and covering the eyes. So he couldn't see real well, which compounded his problems. One time a big fat cat got into the yard and chased the chickens, which I heard because Gunther, instead of protecting his ladies, had somehow got stuck in a tree and was screaming because he didn't know how to get down. Which was weird considering how much he loved to try to fight Jasper. Jasper was not concerned because Gunther couldn't judge distance well and instead of kicking or pecking him he'd just run head-first into the cat's side.

Another thing about roosters, they love doing dances to impress their hens. Every morning I would let the hens out, feed all the animals, and then before I headed off, let Gunther out of chicken jail (he had to sleep inside, so his crowing wouldn't upset the neighbours). Every morning I'd drop him off in front of the ladies, and he'd commence with his big dumb dance. Every morning, Professor Bokbugawk would decide she hated Gunther and his stupid dance, and kick him in the head.

These pics are old, I'll try to chase up some newer pics of Gunther. As he grew his tail became ridiculously big and so did his crest, spurs and devil-horn comb.

ZacAttac21

#4
December 14, 2016, 02:31:14 PM
Your stories amuse me. xD

Merlin

#5
December 16, 2016, 01:04:52 AM
I have a million Gunther stories. He was high-maintenance because he is very dumb.



But I'm still scrounging up old pictures of him, so here's my current flock again with bonus Jasper photobomb (if he is not the centre of attention he becomes sad). My hens are all very lovely... except for Professor during the springtime, when she loses her tiny chicken mind and becomes a screaming, broody arsehole. Fun fact: chickens are capable of screeching the same noise horrible screech as a sulphur-crested cockatoo, if they get a mind to. Professor hates people in the spring and raises her hackles and screeches when she sees them in her yard.

Merlin

#7
February 17, 2017, 01:49:18 AM
Quote from: CubiKitsune on February 16, 2017, 09:09:22 PM
http://cheezburger.com/1559557/weve-found-the-most-unique-chicken-in-the-world-and-we-cant-stop-staring

Those chickens are really cool, but insanely expensive! I love em. They're not the only chickens with black flesh, silkies have it too. They also have extra toes! They are also as dumb as 2 short planks.

Foxx Trotter

#9
March 21, 2017, 01:18:07 PM
I saw that a few days ago on Facebook, quite interesting. :P

Dishonored

#10
March 21, 2017, 02:27:06 PM
 "Feeds a family of 30!"
"Death before Dishonor" they always said. It's because death is far less painful than eternal dishonor.

Merlin

#11
March 22, 2017, 02:29:55 AM
Big birbs are good because there's more birb for the huggin'

Merlin

#14
May 18, 2017, 08:22:41 PM

ZacAttac21

#15
September 23, 2017, 10:26:30 PM Last Edit: September 23, 2017, 10:27:17 PM by CubiKitsune
I've already shown this to Merlin, but it's just so dang good I'ma have to share it with the rest of y'all: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D23sMvVnrow

(I should warn you, though: the audio gets kind of annoying.)
Print
Go Up Pages1
User actions