first off i had no idea where to put this, so i put here where members say their ''things'' is that ok?well, on with the topic...
where to start?i'll try...
Chapter 1: Epilogue
there was this phase of mine that i was pretty happy...i had the car i always wanted to have my precious trueno 86 i had the job of my life, in home EVERYTHING was fine, ok, dandy!!!so it was a hell of a good time...i live in a small town so everyone knows each other and i had a pretty good fame here...specially with da ladies (truth, i am not being a jerk)...so...i met this girl.
Chapter 2: The Happy Hour
one day i went to this music house (where anyone can go to the stage and sing, play whatever) and it's a place where i always go, it's fun...then i saw this spetacular good looking girl that i had to meet...shortening things i introduced myself to her as she said: ''i know...i know everything about you...i have been looking at you for months''....wow....i couldn't believe i could had this impact to someone...so we started to date....she was awesomelly gorgeous and fun too, so we had an wonderfull time together...
Chapter 3: The Mistake
as i was seeing i had her in my hands and yet girls hitting on me everyday i got tempted to have ALL!so, i started to ignore her (btw, her name is Marilene) because i could always hang out and i knew when i was back all i ahd to do was call her house (she lives in front of my house, coincidence?)...as i had her any time, i went to rock the night and got back like 4 or 3 am calling her for us to make sex...i only looked for her to do that...she begged me to change to become what i once was but all i could do was to turn my back to her, ignoring the poor girl...so this went for months....months....
Chapter 4: The Lost
after all that ''hanging'' one day her sister came to my house to talk to me...she said marilene was in pain crying everyday because of the jerk i am....i said: ''screw her, if she wants me that's how it must be...i can't be prisoner or tied to a person...'' (i can't belive i said that, that day)....so....she just broke up with me...the first times i could get things solved to get back....but with time it went more and more dificult...
Chapter 5: Nightmare Starts
so with the final breaking up i was all like ''that's cool and stuff'' but with time...i started to dream with her....at my dreams or she was like a really sick unhelathy person, or an extremelly gorgeous person....but i had dreams....with her....for almost every night....so this went...imagining things, i tried to get back to her as it was impossible, even me talking to her....not that she ignored me...worse...she act like she didn't care....and that hurted...i just don't know why, but it felt like a knife through your belly...
Chapter 6: Soul in Pain
so...time has passed...dreams not...i had 2 gf's after that...no, 3...but none like could make me forget HER...and i still had to facea hell of a time cause my brother crashed my car (that i loved) and it had no inssurance, so i felt so sad like i had los everything, dunno why...i still think, imagine, wonder what happened....but i just can't get to that...i still have no idea of what happened or why happened....so i THINK ABOUT HER, DREAM ABOUT HER, WHEN I SEE SOME GIRL I IMAGINE WHAT THIS GIRL AND HER HAVE IN COMMON (WAY TO DRESS, TALK, ACT, FIGURE) AND I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE...
Chapter 7: Conclusion (just give me one God!)
so still today (now) i dunno what to think...do i feel this cause i feel guilty?or cause i live in front of her and keep seeing her everyday?or cause she is just soo good looking and i misss the sex?or whatever?or anything?or EVERYTHING?or i just.....love her?
anyway just post what you think or tips or advice or anything...i feel like i must solve this in my mind...but i don't want any bloody therapy....not that...i just need any friends (yes even here) to help me out of this confusing state of mind....this virgin state of mind....
btw: sorry if sometimes you didn't get me, my english isn't THAT good you know... :)
phew...i feel alleviated...
Creative writing goes into the Tower of Art.
Quote from: Darkmoon on August 26, 2006, 11:59:36 PM
Creative writing goes into the Tower of Art.
I agree u_u
(tick tick tick) GYA... D:
Quote from: Darkmoon on August 26, 2006, 11:59:36 PM
Creative writing goes into the Tower of Art.
lol thx dark!
but anyway i wanna see replies with advices!!!!!!!! (for God's sake!)
"Don't do downright stupid things and wonder why people get pissy at you" ?
Don't mess with us girls cuz then we'll make you feel aweful afterwards
i guess i am having what i deserve...but i still think she didn't forget me...
She probably hasn't.
OTOH, since you knifed her pretty thoroughly, don't you think perhaps some fairly serious apology is suitable? Until you prove to her that you really have turned over a new leaf, she's goign to be particularly sceptical about you.
Once bitten, twice shy, and all that. I really can't say I blame her, from what you've said. Trust goes both ways, after all. If she can't trust you to be true, how can you expect to trust her to do the same?
i think she's always going to be the one who got away mate, i guess all you can do is learn from this mistake and not do it again, if you start hounding her about it imagine how she'll feel. It's time to let go....
If this is real, I have no idea how this got moved to the art forum.
Quote from: mini-lion on August 27, 2006, 04:36:01 PM
. It's time to let go....
i try to say that to myself EVERY SINGLE DAY...but i can't take her off of my mind...i don't know why...i want to...or maybe somewhere inside me doesn't...and llearch i already apologized to her but she treats me like i was nobody...not that she treats me bad...she just treats me...like a normal person...and that hurts me.
I'm not saying you need to apologise to her.
You -already- know you need to.
What I'm saying is -she- needs to accept the apology. That's -much- harder to do, and there's no way you can force it. It's entirely possible, as others have said, that she's not going to let it go, and, as such, you're stuck.
I'm afraid I really can't help you any further than that - usually I've realised I screwed up somewhat earlier than this...
If this is true, then serves you right.
Quote from: Gareeku on August 28, 2006, 01:28:03 PM
If this is true, then serves you right.
I agree with Gar. >=P
Quote from: Gareeku on August 28, 2006, 01:28:03 PM
If this is true, then serves you right.
that's not the main point...
raphael says:
i guess i am having what i deservethe point is completely a harder task...way harder...i must get her forgiveness then i will be able to see if my new feelings are true or not...
Well if you had kept your dick in your pants, then you wouldn't need to ask for her forgiveness. You hurt her and abused her trust. It will very likely take her a long time for her to trust you again.
Quote from: Gareeku on August 28, 2006, 01:59:33 PM
Well if you had kept your dick in your pants, then you wouldn't need to ask for her forgiveness. You hurt her and abused her trust. It will very likely take her a long time for her to trust you again.
no offense buddy but i think you're completely lost here...
Ah yes, so I was, my apologies. However, i still stand by the view that it will take some time for her to get over the hurt that you dealt her. And yes, you did abuse her trust, because she trusted you to stand by her instead of ignoring her just because other girls hit on you (or so you say). Everyone is tempted, but we acknowledge those that we already have. Its too bad you couldn't see that and treated her like shit.
you see...i KNOW of what I did...don't need to remind me all the time... :(
the question now is how will i make things up with her, many time has passed and she still doesn't get like...mmm...let me think...she seens to look at me how she would be looking at some garbage (wich is not entirely wrong :( )...BUT, i want that to be over...i want us like we were before...like when we even hadn't kissed...like, at least, friends...then i THINK i'll see what i feel...i want the smoke down to see the horizon...
Sounds to me that you just want what you can't have.
You messed up pretty bad, and whether or not she forgives you is entirely up to her. There's nothing YOU can do to make her forgive you.
All I can say is learn from this and don't make the same mistake again with the next girl.
And I...don't see how this is art. o.O
Blame Darkmoon! *points!*
She aint worth yer time. Give it a few years and come back to the plate.
Quote from: Netami on August 28, 2006, 05:02:40 PM
She aint worth yer time. Give it a few years and come back to the plate.
i really enjoyed Netami's opinion...seens to me like some people above created their points of view based on the ''victim's side'' and forgeting all the rest...i made many mistakes, yes, but i was sorry for it, wanting to show how much i care about her (one way or another) so i think she should be true to me and to herself talking about what happened instead of: ''no, no...don't mind it's ok...''
about the thread change...dark said it was creative writing and should be placed here....dark is a cool guy and i like him! :)
You keep saying/asking how you're going to gain her trust again. IMO, you're giving yourself too much credit; if I were were in her shoes, I'd never forgive you.
How can people take the 'victims side' when the only side we've heard is yours?
There's just some things that you can't be forgiven for, or it will take longer than usual.
I'm a little put out that you don't seem to want to hear any opinion other than 'screw her, her loss" or ones that take your side. That just makes it look like you're just looking for pity instead of actual help.
I think you need to really listen and take some of the advice people gave you to heart and move on. Otherwise you'll only end up hurting her and yourself.
As a general rule of thumb, any time spent thinking about a woman that isn't related to cooking, cleaning, or sex is a waste of time.
Honestly, do you think she cares enough to analyze the situation so in depth? You pissed her off, you're both young, shit happens. Five years from now she will have been with a ton of guys while you're still whistfully trying to consider how to apologize or get back with her. Some times it just isn't worth it, whether you're better or worse as a person. Now get back to masturbating and let time do it's work.
again, i don't want to be rude but you're 16, this is beyond your understanding hazmat...
i respect zina but netami....i am sorry if i am being rude...KICKS ASS!!!!!!but my greatest fear netami is to not be able to forget her or anything since i live in front of her i see her everyday, when some dude gets there i see it right through my window...then again maybe i am just being idiot for saying or thinking like this...i stilll haven't come to a clear state of mind to understand myself...but i think i am getting close to it....
for more girls that might come to me with stones in hands:
What keeps the real you from coming out in the open with your real feelings is the emotional baggage called resentment. Bitterness and anger will linger in the heart for years, if you allow it to, because you are unable to forgive and then forget.When we don't forgive what happens? Unforgiveness causes shame, guilt and anger, and we become emotionally overstressed with our spouse, which limits our own "love capacity" to be what God intended for it to be. Well in all reality, a person never really forgets, but they can forgive.I fully believe that what we "generate into our heart will come out in our actions." Our capacity to love is how true we are to ourselves. We certainly aren't very true to ourselves or to God when we are unable to forgive our spouse.
When we forgive our spouse completely and unconditionally, as God forgives us then we no longer experience the past hurts. We feel freer to be ourselves and to be more in control of who we are. With that, the spiritual growth process begins to kick in and we indeed experience love, even to those who are cruel to us or don't love us at all.
Ehh, if you're worried about seeing her everyday and feeling bad for it, just make it brief. Approach her and apologize and move on with your life. Whether she accepts your apology or not, you've got it off your chest and what she does from then on is her own business. Watching guys go into her house and dwelling on it is a waste of your time and sort of stalker creepy. Guess what? She's probably having sex. Not a big deal.
And I have no &@^!ing idea what that block of text is supposed to be. Since when did this have anything to do with God?
So...let me get this straight. You were a general jerk to her for MONTHS and flirted with other girls and basically used her for sex...and she should take you back because....that's what God wants...?
Uh...
yeah.
If you honestly think that you can mess with someone's heart and hurt them to that degree with NO consequence, then I hope this reality check will teach you something, because I can probably guess she wont EVER take you back. If she does, then I am seriously dissappointed in her own sense of self worth. Because nine times out of ten, if someone cheats on you, they're going to do it again. And no one wants to be made the fool twice. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me and all that.
You can try, but if she has any self-respect what so ever, she wont take you back.
And you shouldn't want her back. You're a manly man! You spread your seed, and she's just another field to plow. You apologize, you move on, life is good. Hell, she's probably going to think you're a pussy for even thinking about it. Women want a big, strong man to sire their children but a man more attuned to their psychological needs to raise them. I think you're exempt from the latter for all the baggage, and you already attempted the former, so she's used up her purpose. ;)
Quote from: Netami on August 28, 2006, 06:11:04 PM
And you shouldn't want her back. You're a manly man! You spread your seed, and she's just another field to plow. You apologize, you move on, life is good. Hell, she's probably going to think you're a pussy for even thinking about it. Women want a big, strong man to sire their children but a man more attuned to their psychological needs to raise them. I think you're exempt from the latter for all the baggage, and you already attempted the former, so she's used up her purpose. ;)
Well, when you put it THAT way.
I am just a poor women, after all. Some man needs to come by and smack me for shootin' off my fool mouth. Why am I even on the computer? How did I learn to write?
Back to the sowing room I go~.
Does anyone want some mittens? :3
i just wanted to show that EVEN God can forgive, why can't she?
anyway, maybe i am acting like this because i still feel like she is MINE...
maybe i am just being possessive and all, sometimes a friend or so says: ''hey dude, how could you let that prettie go?you nuts?''
well, i am always polite, but sometimes i really would like to reply to some of those bastards: ''you go and get some you f***ing idiot!!!!!''
zina, even if she maybe....loves me?and believe i am ''changed''?
i believe in people, i want and i need to...otherwise much things wouldn't just make any sense...
then again netami's opinion amuses me...yet i don't think this is so simple...
mittens?yay!
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 06:15:18 PM
anyway, maybe i am acting like this because i still feel like she is MINE...
If that's how you view her, and she takes you back, she's an idiot.
That is all.
First of all, I would love for some mittens. I would also love for some dinner, so get crackin' woman!
Dude, don't say "even God" can forgive, because I am fairly certain that, by some accounts, God is supposedly the guy that can forgive anybody. It'd be better to say, like, Monty Burns. I mean, shit, if Monty Burns can forgive somebody, then surely you can forgive me for being a sleaze. Which I am also fairly certain is a fallacy and just poor debating.
But yeah, it aint worth your time to find a clear answer. Just apologize, move on to the next flower. She is NOT yours, and women hate the idea of being owned by one man (unless that's their "thing") so don't even try to get all lording over her. I spent a long time worrying over an ex I had from Junior High that I lost after moving when I realized it was just creepy and obsessive.
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 05:56:59 PM
again, i don't want to be rude but you're 16, this is beyond your understanding hazmat...
It's kind of ironic really, I'm this young, have never been in a relationship, but people tell me I give good relationship advice. :)
So quit dwelling on the past, and live in the present. What is the present? You're not with her. What is the future? You're still not with her. Hell, if she had any sense at all, and all you do all day is look at your window at her house and think about her (I'm not saying that's what you
do do), she'd move.
Quote from: ×HaZ×MaT× on August 28, 2006, 06:37:08 PM
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 05:56:59 PM
again, i don't want to be rude but you're 16, this is beyond your understanding hazmat...
It's kind of ironic really, I'm this young, have never been in a relationship, but people tell me I give good relationship advice. :)
Age shouldn't matter. Only experience. *shrug*
All of my friends say that I am pretty smart with relationships. You guys can probably say that I am not. How does this happen? Well, when you just got dumped by a girl, some guy giving you advice sounds pretty qualified. Heh.
Leafer here is wasting his manly energies trying to qualify himself for some unknown female standard. Women really aren't all that deep, they can be just as shallow as the stereotypical man. Chances are she wasn't all that great to begin with and you're just pining over something you can't have. It's a cocktail of guilt, lust, and romanticizing.
Quote from: Zina on August 28, 2006, 06:39:19 PM
Quote from: ×HaZ×MaT× on August 28, 2006, 06:37:08 PM
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 05:56:59 PM
again, i don't want to be rude but you're 16, this is beyond your understanding hazmat...
It's kind of ironic really, I'm this young, have never been in a relationship, but people tell me I give good relationship advice. :)
Age shouldn't matter. Only experience. *shrug*
Ageism sucks. It's true that experience comes with age, but some things are just natural. (Such as intelligence, or lack thereof...)
Also, don't assume that something is beyond someone's understanding just because of their age. Sure, it can be in some cases, for example the trenches of the World Wars, or what it's like to go through for families of those killed in various bombing incidents, but you shouldn't just outright shun them and tell them to sod off.
Other people provide other viewpoints, and other viewpoints aren't always going to fit with yours. People are not things that you can own, no matter how you look at it.
Get over it and move on. You'll only dig yourself into a deeper hole if you continue worrying, fretting and such. Feel free to dig yourself out, since you seem to be rejecting all offers of help.
Here's the basic rundown on things.
You want her back. She doesn't want you back. Its your fault, you were an ass. Move on, get over it, leave her to run her life and you to run yours. Learn from your mistakes and treat women better and not like objects next time, and maybe you'll have more stable relationships.
That is all.
dunno, dunno...still when i see her i get upset...dunno why...sometimes i get really happy...sometimes i get sad...it's so confusing and weird all this mix of feelings when all i am used to, is like netami is saying...yes, i am somehow a guy like him.but people say i am also kind and gentle, i ''rarely'' feel like cheating...oh god i don't want to be so fake in saying i never think about any other girl when i am with someone...every guy does that and i am not a freaking monster machine...
then again, i think myself (me) to be a good guy, gentle and kind, but yet i have this ''darkside'' thing...yet i never meant to disrespect or hurt any girl...i am getting this idea that i am not fully ready for a relation yet...just...you know...fun!
BUT MAYBE, I SAID! :>
just because you may think about other women when you're in a relationship with someone, it doesn't mean you can be an ass to your partner.
Quote from: Gareeku on August 28, 2006, 07:29:02 PM
just because you may think about other women when you're in a relationship with someone, it doesn't mean you can be an ass to your partner.
*sleeps due to the tedium*
oh, really??? :>
Er, yes actually. Also, acting like an idiot towards people who are actually trying to help doesn't do you any favours. It actually makes you look rather pathetic.
Butting heads is boring. I am still waiting for my dinner, which I hope Zina cooked enough for everyone. Or else she fails her foremothers.
hahaha...i am sure she didn't fail...even with my steak! like the good girl she is...
Sorry guys. I left you for another man. He has more money and his car is nicer. :<
I hope you understand.
SEE?????SEE?????????SEE HOW WOMEN ARE????????? *opens up with Netami a very manly club that uses women teeth to open beers*
Man, you're just on and off with the moods... Decide on one and stick with it, because right now you never had me pulled into this, and you probably never will. Half the time you act like you don't give a shit, the other half you're (pretending?) to be dark and depressed about something. Which is it going to be?
But where's the "WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS?!"
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 08:12:12 PM
SEE?????SEE?????????SEE HOW WOMEN ARE????????? *opens up with Netami a very manly club that uses women teeth to open beers*
Around these parts, we call those "Manly clubs' gay bars. :3
Quote from: Zina on August 28, 2006, 08:14:31 PM
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 08:12:12 PM
SEE?????SEE?????????SEE HOW WOMEN ARE????????? *opens up with Netami a very manly club that uses women teeth to open beers*
Around these parts, we call those "Manly clubs' gay bars. :3
aww man, you got me there, good one! (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v390/raphael9999/cha01.gif)
hey, about my mood....as i said...i am confused man...don't rush me to anything....
confused doesn't mean you get to act like a retard when it's inappropriate. If you're going to keep giving us these speeches and being emo, then damn well prove to us everything you say is meaningful, rather than showing us things that would only convince a good part of us that she's better off not knowing you.
''lol'' is a very good sentence now...
1 - i don't need to prove anything to nobody.
2 - we were only joking
3 - i joke almost all the time, and i can pretty guess people can see when i am serious...
now, are we done?
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 08:47:59 PM
1 - i don't need to prove anything to nobody.
2 - we were only joking
3 - i joke almost all the time, and i can pretty guess people can see when i am serious...
1. So judging by that double negative, you DO need to prove things to us.
2. There's a time and a place for everything, and this kinda isn't it for you in particular.
3. See 2.
Huzzah for double negatives and how funny it is when you explain them to the people that use them! :D
people, lose that, don't get so off topic...anyway, i think this won't go much away anyway...
Who said forgiving you meant she ever had to speak with you again? I've forgiven a friend of mine for being a stupid ass, but I'm not bothering with him anymore, because I know he will never change, and I value my life at it's currently moderate stress level.
Quote from: Zina on August 28, 2006, 08:14:31 PM
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 08:12:12 PM
SEE?????SEE?????????SEE HOW WOMEN ARE????????? *opens up with Netami a very manly club that uses women teeth to open beers*
Around these parts, we call those "Manly clubs' gay bars. :3
Well of course we are going to be gay when
YOU LEFT US FOR A RICH GUY.
Quote from: Leafar on August 28, 2006, 09:51:23 PM
people, lose that, don't get so off topic...anyway, i think this won't go much away anyway...
Nobody's going off topic, you're only trying to shut up the people who don't tell you what you want to hear.
aridas, you're sick...
damaris, but i HAVE changed...
Netami, we need an extra job! >:3
Oh sure, I'm sick, just like everyone else who disagrees with you. Grow up.
i was having an idea last night...
i think one of the things that makes me like this right now is because i am alone...
cause i have nobody right now, so i feel more emo and stuff...
a long time friend called last night, she was asking how i was, why did i disappear and stuff...hey, that's a hell of a great person and come to think of it i haven't had many party times lately...yeah...i guess i am moving on...someday, perhaps...me and HER (marilene) get to talk things over sincerely...one day, but i don't feel like any rush at all...i'm cool...and i would like to thank some people here (no names, must be polite to everyone) in this thread they helped me a lot i think i just needed to talk about it a little to come to my senses...yeah, thanks everyone... :)