The Clockwork Mansion

Now, 'cause I feel like it, I made this thread for all to post their favorite quotes! Meh, I thought it would be fun. Anyway,

"Martivir thric gixustratt tundar."-- Dungeons and Dragons, Draconomicon, the Book of Dragons

(yes, I play dungeons and dragons. Please don't criticize me for it.)

I will translate the quote if anyone needs it... But for now, I'd just like to see who knows what it means...  :3

another quote!

"Jeez Pearson, why are you always in Mexico when I need you?!" -- Robert (friend of mine)

"He's a coffee boy at the daily planet. HE'S A COFFE BOY AT THE DAILY PLANET! WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING ON THE MOON???" - Superman is a Dick http://www.superdickery.com

Quote from: Kogitsune on June 05, 2007, 12:30:38 AM
another quote!

"Jeez Pearson, why are you always in Mexico when I need you?!" -- Robert (friend of mine)

Use the "modify" button to edit your posts to avoid double posting.

Quote from: Zina on June 05, 2007, 12:35:03 AM

Use the "modify" button to edit your posts to avoid double posting.

Hey! I think you quoted Llearch!

[Thanatopsis] was written in 1817, when Bryant was 23. Had he died then, the world would have thought it had lost a great poet. But he lived on. -Bergen Evans

It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness. -Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton

A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring;
For shallow draughts intoxicate the brain
And drinking largely sobers us again. -Alexander Pope

And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains -Percy Bysshe Shelley

Use the "modify" button to edit your posts to avoid double posting. -Zina

Lord Uxbridge: By God, Sir. I've lost my leg.
Duke of Wellington: By God, Sir. So you have.

And all men kill the thing they love,
          By all let this be heard,
        Some do it with a bitter look,
          Some with a flattering word,
        The coward does it with a kiss,
          The brave man with a sword! - Oscar Wilde

"The die is cast." Julius Caesar

"You, sir, are drunk!"
"And you, madam, are ugly, but I'll be sober in the morning."

"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."

Lady Astor and Winston Churchill. They don't make 'em like they used to.

Hee...this one made me laugh

"Shut up and sit down you big balled f***"

and another

"Sweet mother of a sweaty penis,what have I done?!"

Some of my favorite quotes from Jerome K. Jerome

"It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar."

"I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. I love to keep it by me; the idea of getting rid of it nearly breaks my heart."

"One cannot enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do."

"But there, everything has its drawbacks, as the man said when his mother-in-law died, and they came down upon him for the funeral expenses."

"It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so."

"The weather is like the government, always in the wrong."

"There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do."

Quote from: Metal Juggernaut on June 05, 2007, 09:15:57 AM
Hee...this one made me laugh

Do me a favour, MJ. Have a look at the rating on this particular board before you post again.

Some of my favourite Russel Peters lines about his dad and punishing kids.

"My Dad's theory was 'If I get rid of one I'll just make another one. Then I'll tell the new one what an idiot the last one was.'"

Next one's a bit long, hope I can quote it right....

"So I the next time my dad's about to beat me I decide to follow my buddy Ryan's advice, I turn to my dad and say 'Don't do it! I'll phone children's aide'... You ever had your parent's call your bluff? 'You'll do what?' 'I'll phone children's aide' 'Ohhhhh, brrrr well let me get you the phone tough guy.' 'W-what are you doing? If I call you'll get in trouble.' 'I might get into a little bit of trouble, but I know that it's going to take them twenty three minutes to get here. In that time SOMEBODY gonna get a hurt reeeeal baad.'"

Quote from: llearch n'n'daCorna on June 05, 2007, 09:29:08 AM

Quote from: Metal Juggernaut on June 05, 2007, 09:15:57 AM
Hee...this one made me laugh

Do me a favour, MJ. Have a look at the rating on this particular board before you post again.

Oops,I'm sorry guys I accidentaly looked over that

"Hey guys,what if red was new blue and black was the new pink,what would the new tan be?"

FINALL! I've been waiting for someone to start a thread like this! Now I can quote whole conversations! Here we go!

COLONEL ALLOY: Hey Krunk, were you able to repair our mystery-bot here?
KRUNK: Of course I f***ing fixed him! He was a huge pain in the f***ing waist-pan, 'cuz he's some kinda coustom-jobbie! But nuthin' I couldn't handle. Some of his memory chip were fried, so we'll need a new data upload. But after that he should be as good as f***ing new!
COLONEL ALLOY: Hah, does his I.D. chip still function?
KRUNK: Yeah, says his name's "Gi-i-i-itch"
COLONEL ALLOY: Alright, glitch, welcome to the droid rebellion.

Dammit! the bell just rang. Gotta go!

Firefly quotes!

    *Horse-mounted bandits accost a Conestoga wagon (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conestoga_wagon)-like raft, driven by Jayne and a hunched-over woman.*
    Bandit: "You gonna give us what's due us. And every damn thing else on that boat. And I think maybe you gonna give me a little one-on-one time with the missus."
    Jayne: "Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature."
    *The "woman" looks up — it's Mal in a dress.*
    Mal: "How can you say that? How can you shame me in front of new people?"
    Jayne: "If I could make you prettier I would!"
    Mal: "You are not the man I met a year ago!"
    *Mal and Jayne get the draw on the bandits.*
    Mal: "Now think real hard. You been bird-doggin' this township awhile now. They wouldn't mind a corpse of you. Now, you can luxuriate in a nice jail cell, but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you."

--

And a following scene;

    Inara: "So... explain to me again why Zoë wasn't in the dress?"
    Mal: "Tactics, woman. Needed her in the back. Besides, them soft cotton dresses feel kinda nice. There's a whole... airflow."
    Inara: "And you'd know that because...?"
    Mal: "You can't open the book of my life and jump in the middle. Like woman, I am a mystery."
    Inara: "Best keep it that way. I withdraw the question."

--

:B

I still liked the big guy and the motor of the Firefly.

"Now, will -you- take this message back?"

YAY FIREFLY! But now, time for other TV shows, and my brothers too.

"Oh s***, there's a bike in my car!"
-My older brother


From an RP session with my friends (for those offended, I am sorry):
Scott: "Ivanna sees something shiny in the bushes. Being an elf, she's the first to notice it."
Me: "Oh, so the elves are Jewish now?" (slaps her hand over her mouth)
Everyone else:  (hysterical laughter)

(Note: At least three people there were Jewish, so it was acceptable.)

From TV/Movies:

"Why didn't you just drink the blood, you idiot!"
-Alucard berating Seras in Hellsing OVA I

(Hiro's about to teleport to Sylar, holding his sword)
Ando: Hiro?
(Hiro turns)
Ando (in Japanese): You look badass.
Hiro (in Japanese): Really?
- Heroes. Duh.

The entire 'student bloopers' article is dead funny, but I think these about sum it up:


"[Abraham] Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands"

"Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead."

"Handel was half German, half Italian and half English. He was very large."

Lesse, I'm back, and continuing the earlier quote:
After Glitch(you) gets a new data upload, (basicly just the backstory for Metal Arms) this next scene starts up, with Glitch awakening to an alarm that is sounding through the Droid compound:

P.A. ANNOUNCER: Attention! Attention! Mil Troops have broken through the mines! All Droids report to the command cenetr immediatly! Attention, Attention....
*Glitch walks through some corridors, camera changes to an assembly area, where Colonel Alloy is giving a speech*
COLONEL ALLOY: Alright, listen up! I need some badass can-lickers, front and center! The Mils have busted through to our side of the mines, and are about to march their rusted metal chassis into Droid Town.  Someones gotta go down there and seal those mines, pronto! So, where are my heroes? Which of you brave troopers is up to the task? *looks around*
*lights slowly turn on*
*there are only two droids*
COLONEL ALLOY: Your kiddin' me. You two are all that's left?
DROID: Uh, sir, yes sir. All the others are alrady out in the firefight sir, or the've been um...destroyed...
*Alloy smacks forhead*
*glitch walks in*
GLITCH: Yo, you got room for one more?
ALLOY: You got a screw loose, kid? What the hell do you know about fightin' Mils, newbie?
GLITCH: Nah, but you got any other options, chief?
ALLOY: Yeah, well... Learn fast or die tryin'.
Ok, *points to the two Droids* Stick with Hosed and Screwed here...(yeah, those are the actuall names of the droids, lmao)

Several levels later, you are chasing down a Mil Grunt who managed to get in and out of Droid Town without getting scrapped by you, and he is trying to rush back to a Mil Compound to transmit the location of your one safe haven to General Corrosive(the bad guy). After a racing level through the Wastelands on a R.A.T. (Rapid Armored Transport) You stop at a chasm with a small bridge that the Grunt, Vlax, is running across.

VLAX: You'll never catch me, you rust-busting rejects! Nyehahahahaha!
KRUNK: C'mon! We gotta keep after that rusty-nutted f***pile! Everyone out!
GLITCH: I can move faster on foot without you guys! Take he RAT around the far side of the chasm, and try and head him off at the pass.
KRUNK: 'Head him off at the pass'? Who the hell says that? Is he some sort of f***ing cowboy? *starts driving off with the RAT* You better be right aout this, screw-boy, because if you don't stop Vlax, I will personnaly weld your exhaust pipe to your ball bearing!!

Einstein wins.   :3

"If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut."

"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax."

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

"What really interests me is whether God had any choice in the creation of the world."

"The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education."

"When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, it seems like two minutes. When you sit on a hot stove for two minutes, it seems like two hours that's relativity."

"If one studies too zealously, one easily loses his pants."

"You have a zombie infested city, and you're worried about stuff inadvertently being set on fire? Man, I would love to have your worries. "
-Dr. B

"Looking for?  Screw that.  I was trying to make a big mess"
-Teekay Ahr

"Yeah, like it's my fault your hair's flammable?"
-Black Mage(8-Bit Theater)

...this is where I wish I had my quotes file from my Toshiba e330.  The screen died, and I haven't replaced it yet.  Maybe I can use my mom's PDA to copy everything over from my backup card.[edit]haha, dug up the file.

A lot of these aren't going to make bloody much sense.  The main thing you need to know is that Kurook is an orc, Kane is a werewolf, and bloody NOT the wrestler, and many, many entertainment franchises were butchered to create these quotes.

Logan: Project D?
Kane: Yeah, you know.  Successor to Project C, precursor to Project E...
Logan: Ah.  I've had problems with things that were 'Title-Letter.'  Department H, Weapon X...
Kane: better than 'Weapon-Why?' I hate pacifists.
Kurook: me too.

I'm going to be the first GM in the world to have to worry about what Heartless taste like.
-Nathan Hullcrew

Pegus: *being keelhauled along the ground* Thiiiiiiiiiiiiis suuuuuuuucks.
Kurook: *sees Tekkaman being all mopey.*  You know, it's hard to be cool and mopey when your robot's going like this.  *waves hands in air in imitation of Pegus*

Kurook: Bald!
Prof. Xaviar: Yes, I am bald.  People should not be so quick to judge those different from them, however.  For example: green.

Ios: He looks better with the hole.
Kane: How do you think he'd look in the belly of a big, green sea serpent?
Ios: That is cruel and inhumane!  What did that leviathan ever do to you?

me: I'm going in a zigzag pattern, with myhead kept low.
GM: as suspiciously as possible, then.  With your headlights on?
me: ABSOLUTELY!
(I do not remember this event.)

Galactic Guardsman: I need to see your identification.
Zebo Krug: I'm with the Bothan Spynet.  We don't have IDs.
GG: I have heard the Bothan Spynet use fake IDs.  Can i see your fake Identefication?
Zebo: you want to ID me by my fake ID.
GG: yes.
Zebo: *hands over his real identification* OK, here.  I'm currently posing as a bounty hunter.

Antony: I think dropping the ceiling on us was a bit aggressive!
Nick: did it hurt?
Antony: no, because I'm smarter than the ceiling!

Shaedok: so what do you think these droids are worth, anyway?
Zebo Krug: more than you!
Shaedok: Next time you say that, I'm going to leave you to the Force-Lightning-shooting creature.

Kurook: Teleport us back down.  And can you do something with this dead monkey?

If we're doing video game quotes, here are a couple of mine:

Love is a slippery sled that flips over and pins you to the slope.  And then, at night, the ice weasels come. -Bonn the Pirate (this is funny for other reasons)

So this is the power of the Granasaber... It fights evil and has plenty of leg room.

Please ignore these numbers and letters: 293ntg

ROOT: Oh, stop quoting and give me something to shoot.
FOALY: Suit youself... *pulls what looks like a fake finger off the equipment rack*
ROOT: What's that?
FOALY: A finger. What does it look like?
ROOT: A finger...
FOALY: Yes, but it's no ordinary finger...*glances around, makes sure no one is watching* The tip contains a pressurized dart. One shot only. You tap the knuckle with your thumb and someone goes beddie-bye.
ROOT: Why haven't I seen this before?
FOALY: It's a covert kinda thing...
ROOT: And?
FOALY: Well, there have been accidents...
ROOT: Tell me, Foaly.
FOALY: Our agents keep forgetting they have it on.
ROOT: Meaning they shoot themselves.
FOALY: *nods miserably* One of our best sprites was picking his nose at the time. Three days on the critical conditions list.
-Artemis Fowl

"If I want to hear an ass, I'll fart."
-Madman

"my mother never realised the irony in calling me a son of a b@#$h" unknown famouse dude

"i'm not suffering from insanity... i'm enjoying every minute of it" :kirby

"Power corrupts. Absolute power is kinda neat."

"When you fall in a bottomless pit, you die of starvation."
-What's Her Face, Teen Girl Squad

"I fear that one day I will meet God, He'll sneeze, and I won't know what to say."
-Ronnie Shakes

"For the love of God, Montresor!"
"Yes... for the love of God!"
-The Cask of Amontillado

More later.

 I have an entire chunk of a webpage devoted to interesting quotes. What to choose, what to choose...

"Life is pain, one long stretch of it, dotted with moments of pleasure and joy. The wise learn to ignore the pain, and string the dots together." - Stalker

"People who hang up on your answering machine without leaving any message-not even an apology for wasting your attention-are the most cowardly of pickpockets." - Long-Drink McConnigle

"Ask the next question. Keep on asking questions and don't stop, and sooner or later you'll be asking intelligent ones. If you live long enough." -Theodore Sturgeon

"Being intelligent is not a felony. But most societies evaluate it as at least a misdemeanor." - Lazarus Long

RADIATION EXPOSURE:
  Half a mile from Three-Mile plant during the flap.....................83 millirems
  At the power plant..............................................................1,100 millirems
  During heart catheterization for an angiogram.................45,000 millirems
   ...Which I underwent 18 months ago. I feel fine. - Robert A. Heinlein

"Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of. But do it in private, and wash your hands afterward." - Woodrow W. Smith

"Wherever in the world you go....there you are." - Buckaroo Banzai

"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." - Abraham Lincoln

And I'll stop for now with my personal favorite:

"Whatever you've done, whatever you've been, is all, totally, one hundred percent, your own fault. All." - Dr. (colonel) Richard Colin Campbell Ames

How bout 5 cross yo lip. Stanford

You could pick your nose and you could pick your friends but you cant pick your friends nose

Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer. Homer Simpson

Of late, I'm thinking Einstein was overestimating.

"There are only two things that are infinite, the Universe and Human Stupidity. And I'm not sure about the universe."

"time is not absolute but chaos is" a valiant comic cover.

"Okay, clearly (dodge) you are the textbook definition (dodge) of that noise you make (dodge) when you strum you finger up and down over your lips..."
-Spider-Man in a more recent comic

"He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped there wasn't an afterlife."

(to the tune of the Nokia sing, holding a bazooka upright next to his ear) Oh, di-a-lo-do-dah-a-lo-do-di-a-lo-do DIE!"
-Strong Bad

"To be honest?"
"Yeah."
"I thought you were a narcissist."
"(laughs) I'm too ugly to be a narcissist."
-Ted Koppel talking with Morrie Schwartz, Tuesdays with Morrie

Quote from: Black_angel on June 10, 2007, 10:47:22 AM
"Okay, clearly (dodge) you are the textbook definition (dodge) of that noise you make (dodge) when you strum you finger up and down over your lips..."
-Spider-Man in a more recent comic

That's going in my quote library.
Out of mine and a friend's curiosity, who was the villain?

I dunno who the villain was. He didn't say his name.

Oy. After a look, the comic isn't that recent - it's from 2004. They were redoing the Carnage arc, and the guy never said his name, but he had blue-gray scaly skin and yellow armor and a steel face-mask. He kept yelling "FREE NURHACHI!" Whether he was important or not, I have no idea.

not to derail the thread, but...Nurhachi (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nurhachi) is apparently an old, Chinese, dead dude.

So what you're saying, William, is that Napoleon is an old, dead dude.
-Bill and Ted's Excellent Advenuture

Do not involve me in this thread, i don't handle temptation well

QuoteOn strike

"It's not right!" -Paris Hilton after a judge ordered her to return to jain to serve out her entire 45-day sentance.  Paris was taken out of the courtroom crying and screaming.

BRENDA: Two things, Scolex! One, you are completely insane,
*Scolex rolls eyes*
BRENDA: And two I liked you better fat!!
*Scolex gasps, shocked*
*the cat meows, ducks under chair*
*Scolex still shocked for a moment, then gets a VERY evil grin*
SCOLEX: ....BRING ON THE BROWNIES! HA! Wheel in the waffles! I'm gettin' ready to binge!
-Inspector Gadget

"Ok you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This... is my BOOMSTICK! The 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that?"   -Ash

"Groovy."  :chainsaw   -Ash

"Well hello Mister Fancypants."  -Ash

"Yo, she-bitch! Let's go!"  -Ash

"Gimme some sugar, baby."  -Ash

"Come get some."  -Ash

"Hail to the king, baby."  -Ash

"Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun." -Ash

"Say hello to the twenty-first century!"  -Ash

"I got news for you, pal. You ain't leading but two things right now: Jack and Sh**. And, Jack left town."  -Ash

"Klatu Veratu Ni..(COUGH!!)"  -Ash

"Name's Ash ...(cocks rifle) Housewares"  -Ash

"Keep your damn filthy bones outta my mouth."  -Ash

Quote from: Fuyudenki on June 10, 2007, 10:31:54 PM
So what you're saying, William, is that Napoleon is an old, dead dude.
-Bill and Ted's Excellent Advenuture

That's a movie I have seen more often than is good for me.

"Four score and seven minutes ago, we, your forefathers, were brought forth on a most excellent adventure, conceived by our new friends: Bill and Ted. These two great gentlemen are true to a proposition, which was true in my time, just as it is true today: be easement to each other.
And... PARTY ON DUDES!"  - Abraham Lincoln (and yes, I quoted that from my mind. *hangs head in shame*)

Quote from: Vidar on June 11, 2007, 05:38:53 PM
That's a movie I have seen more often than is good for me.

"Four score and seven minutes ago, we, your forefathers, were brought forth on a most excellent adventure, conceived by our new friends: Bill and Ted. These two great gentlemen are true to a proposition, which was true in my time, just as it is true today: be easement to each other.
And... PARTY ON DUDES!"  - Abraham Lincoln (and yes, I quoted that from my mind. *hangs head in shame*)

I just quoted it to add validity to my post, and moreso to indicate exactly what I was trying to do with my Nurhachi comment.

wait... be easement to each other?  Don't you mean "be excellent to each other?"

I once gave an entire presentation on the Challenger space shuttle disaster in Bell-and-Tedd voice.

Chptr. 1: The Press Gang
   Before the war, things were different. Hell, back then, we were just making our daily living, doing our jobs, drawing our paychecks, and stabbing our fellow men and women in the back. We had no idea how bad things would get. We were fat and happy like maggots on a dead animal. There was enough sporadic violence--rebellions and revolutions and balky colonial governments--to keep the military going, but not enough to really threaten the lifestyles we had grown accoustomed to. We were, in retrospect, fat and sassy.
   And if a real war broke out, well, it was the military's worry. The marines worry. Not ours.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr. 2: The Cush Posting
   Sevice in the military, for those of you unfortunate enough never to have experienced it firsthand, consists of long periods of boredom broken by mind-shredding threats to one's life and sanity. From what I gather from the old tapes, it's always been that way. The best soldiers are those who can wake suddenly, react instantly, and aim precisely.
   Unfortunately, none of those traits are shared by the military  intelligence that controls those soldiers.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr. 3: The Sara System
   The first contact with another sentient race, and they blow up a planet. Helluva calling card.
   Now, blowing up a planet is nothing new. Christ, we humans did it ourselves not too long ago.
   There was a revolt on the planet Korhal. The inhabitants didn't care much for the graft and corruption that was part and parcel of the Confederacy. They tried to rebel. At first the Confederacy tried a soft approach: they took out the rebellion's leaders with assasins, ghost-troopers armed with personal cloaking devices. Unsurprisingly, this just made the people of Korhal angrier and more rebellious. So the Confederacy took a hard line.
   We nuked Korhal from orbit.
   Apocalypse-class missles. 40,000 of them. Some green-tagged idiot on Tarsonis pressed a button, and 35 million people became nothing more than vapor and their homes nothing more than a memory.
   Natually, there were official justifications thereafter about the evil, menacing nature of Korhal, and how they were planning to do it to us if they got even the slightest chance. It was unfortunate that the proof of this accusation was located on a planet covered by blackened glass.
   I think that's what really scared the military about the vaporization of Chau Sara: that there was something else out there that was just as crazy as we were.
   And they were better at it then we were.
-The Liberty Manifesto

--Starcraft: Liberty's Crusade

Chptr. 4: Down on Mar Sara
   There's a period in any war between the first blow and the second. It's a quite moment, an almost tranquil time, when the realization of what has happened is just sinking in an everyone feels they know what happens next. Some prepare to flee. Some prepare to hit back. But no one moves. Not yet.
   It's a perfect moment, when the ball is at the highest point of the throw. The action has been taken, and for one frozen moment everything is moving, but everything is at rest.
   Then there are those jackasses who can't leave such things alone. And the ball starts downward again, the second blow is thrown, and we plunge into the malestrom.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr. 5: Anthem Base
   Nature abhors a vaccume, and human nature hates a lack of information. Where we can't find it, we go looking for it. In some cases we just invent it.
   That was the case in the Sara System. Willfully ignorant, we charged into the hinterland looking for answers--answers that we soon realized we didn't want to find.
   We were stupid to assume that we would be all right. We were stupid to go off half-cocked. We were stupid to go in undergunned. We were stupid to think that we understood what we were getting into.
   And we were most stupid of all to assume that the Protoss were the first alien race that humanity had met.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr. 6: Creeps
   War is easy to understand on paper. It seems so distant and academic in black and white. Even the vid reports have a cool, detached manner that keeps the viewer from understanding how horrible it really is.
   This is nothing more than a sanity filter, allowing those that take in the information to separate the reports and numbers from the awful reality. It's why those who lead armies can do all sorts of terrible things to their troops that no sane man would think of if he had to look them in the eye. Which is one reason they don't.
   But when you're confronted with death, when you're confronted with having to deal out death or die yourself, then everything changes.
   The filter drops away, and you have to deal with the insanity directly.
-The Liberty Manifesto

--Starcraft: Liberty's Cusade

"Now could I drink hot blood, and do such bitter business as the day would quake to look upon!"
--Hamlet, Prince of Denmark

You can bring any calculator you like to the midterm, as long as it
doesn't dim the lights when you turn it on.

— Hepler, Systems Design 182

The die has been cast.
-Julius Ceasar

What's that smell? ... Oh, it's just the troops.
--Necromancer unit from Warcraft 3

Marge: Homie! Bart just joined the army!

Homer: Pfft... by the time Bart turns 18, we already control the world.

...

We're China, right?

To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides.
       - David Viscott, How to Live with Another Person, 1974

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
       - Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992)

"Most people are as happy as they make up their minds to be."
-Abraham Lincoln

"Perhaps I know why it is man alone who laughs: He alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter"
-Freidreich Neitszche

If Jesus Christ were to come to-day, people would not even crucify him. They would ask him to dinner, and hear what he had to say, and make fun of it.
-Thomas Carlyle

"When the forces of darkness descend, in the name of justice, this fist! In the name of truth, these muscles! In the name of honour, this blood! Haa-haa! Champion of Truth and Justice, Grand Papillon! Ready to fight all evildoers! If you think you can face the unfettered fury of my rippling muscles then come on!"
~ Joachim Valentine, Shadow Hearts: Covenant

Chptr 7: Deals
   Arcturus Mengsk. There's a name that is synonymous with terror, betrayal, and violence. A living example of the ends justifying the means. The assasin of the Confederacy of Man. The hero of the blasted world of Korhal. Kng of the universe. A savage barbarian who never let anyone or anything get in is way.
   And yet he is also charming, erudite, and intelligent. When you're in his presense you feel that he's really listening to you, that you're opinions matter, that you're someone important if you agree with him.
   It's amazing. I have often wondered if men like Mengsk don't carry around their own reality-warping bubbles, and all who fall in are suddenly transported to another dimention where the hellish things he says and does suddenlhy make sense.
   At least, that's the effect he always had on me.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr 8: Zerg and Protoss
   It would be easy to declare that Arcturus Mengsk was a master manipulator, which he was, or that he regularly decieved others, which is true as well. But it would be a mistake to deny all personal responsibility of falling into his web.
   It seems now the height of folly to ever have delt with the man, but think of the situation when the Sara system died. You had the mindless beasts of the Zerg on one side, and the unholy fury of the Protoss on the other. And in the middle you had the criminal bureaucracy of the old Confederacy of Man, which was willing to write off the population of two planets just to learn more about their enemies.
   With such a surplus of devils in the universe, what did it matter if there was one more?
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr. 9: Marshal and Ghost
   James Raynor was the most decent man I ever encountered during the fall of the Confederacy. Everyone else, I can safely say, was either a victem or a villain, or quite often both.
   At first was, Raynor seems like a backwoods cowboy, one of the good old boys that you see in bars swapping lies about the days gone by. There's a cocksureness, an overconfidance that just makes you bridle initially. Yet over time you come to see him as a valuable aly and--dare I say it?--a friend.
   It all comes  from belief. Jim Rayno belived in himself, and he believed in those around him. And from that belief came the strength that allowed him and those who followed him to survive everything else the universe threw at him.
   Jim Raynor was a mos decent, honorale man. I suppose that's why his tragedy is the greatest tragedy in this godforsaken war.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr 10: The Wreck of the Norad II
   There's an old earth word. It's called Schadenfreude--the felling of elation that comes from learning of the suffering of others. Like when a rival newsman is suddenly caught cursing in front of a live mike, or that a particularly corrupt alderman just stepped in front of a garbage truck. It's the felling of elation accompanied by a twinge of guilt for feeling so good, and the silent, fervent prayer that something that bad never happens to you.
   With the Protoss and the Zerg biting deep into Confederate territory, we had schadenfreude in buckets.
-The Liberty Manifesto

Chptr 11: Chess
   I played chess with Arcturus Mengsk. I lost regularly, by the way. Someday I'll probably be dragged before some high justice and told that this was a crime against the state, but I will have no defence other than losing more times than I won. More often than not, Mengsk would dangle some bait in front of me in a game, and I would snap at it, only to discover too late that I had been distracted from the trap he was setting.
   The entire human campaign against the Zerg was similar, consisting of a series of defeats, each one more alling then the last because each time we ignored what was realling going on. our first warnings that theZerg were planetside usually came too late, when the creep appeared on our doorsteps or the Protoss warped in with their thunder-god ships.
   We thought we could escape it. Some of us, incuding Mengsk himself, thought we could control it. But we were all pawns in a greater game.
   No, not pawns. Dominos. Each falling in turn, person after person, planet after planet, until we reached the biggest one of them all, the one called Tarsonis.
-The Liberty Manifesto

--Stacraft: Liberty's Crusade

 (At a wedding, to the bride:) "Your family and I go back a long way, Lady," he said. "Did you know that I shot your father on Melpomene? Between the eyes, so that he could see it coming." - Major Joachim Steuben, Standing Down

"Always do your best work at any task, especially the ones you hate. This reduces the likelihood of having to do it over." - Stalker

"Rules of the Game of Life: 1. You can't win. 2. You can't break even. 3. You can't even quit the game..." - Stalker

"I began to sense faintly that secrecy is the keystone of all tyranny. Not force, but secrecy...censorship. When any government, or any church for that matter, undertakes to say to it's subjects, This you may not read, this you must not see, this you are forbidden to know, the end result is tyranny and oppression, no matter how holy the motives. Mighty little force is needed to control a man whose mind has been hoodwinked, contrariwise, no amount of force can control a free man, a man whose mind is free. No, not the rack, not fission bombs, not anything---you can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is kill him." -  John Lyle

"Callahan's Law: Shared pain is lessened; shared joy is increased." - Mike Callahan

"Lady Sally's Law: Shared despair is squared; shared hope is cubed ( or better: Raised to the power of infinity?)." - Lady Sally McGee

"I'm not afraid of death. Death would be a comfort. No, my friend, it's life I'm worried about." - Stalker

*Immunity cell on police scanner*
The suspect is head for the uvula! Repeat, suspect is headed for the uvula!
OSMOSIS: What the hell is a you-voo-luh?
DRIX: It's that dangly thing that hangs out of Frank's-
OSMOSIS: Boxer shorts! Ok!
DRIX: No, not that dangly thing, the one in his throat!
OSMOSIS: . . . ...Oh. I knew that. I knew that!
-Osmosis Jones

"Not to be used for the other use"
--On a Japanese food processor

"Cuz I'm a GNOME, #####!"
-a friend of mine during DnD

(while talking about the Battery Mimics)
" ..they'll give the power back if you ask nicely. Sticking them with a sword helps too."
-Balthier, Final Fantasy 12

"But... If pickles could fly, they'd form an army..."
-Seth, Secret of Mana Theater

"OK, like one time, I was out in the parking lot
Tryin' to remove my excess earwax with a golf pencil
When I see this guy Marty tryin' to carry a big ol' sofa up the stairs all by himself
So I, I say to him, I say "Hey, you want me to help you with that?"
And Marty, he just rolls his eyes and goes
"No, I want you to cut off my arms and legs with a chainsaw!"

So I did."

-From Weird Al's masterpiece, "Albuquerque"

"What's a hypoteneuse?"
"Y'know, that thing between the legs..."
-My little brother and me

"Lay on, Macduff,
And damned be he that first cries 'Hold, enough!'"
-Macbeth

(In a not so recent DnD game, one of the players was explaining to my character, the druid, about Limbo and how there's no nature there.)
Him: No, there's no nature in Limbo.
Me: How can you not have any nature under a stick?
Him: *Makes a face*
Me: Everybody say Jamaica!

'Thus does your argument FAIL!!!!"
-Proffesor Fate (Proffate)

"But why is the rum gone?!"
-Jack Sparrow, POTC : Curse of the Black Pearl

"Life is cruel...Why should the afterlife be any different?!"
Davy Jones, POTC : Dead Man's Chest.

"My peanut!!"
-Jack Sparrow, POTC: At World's End

"Nobody move.... I dropped me brain."
-Jack Sparrow, POTC: At World's End

and the classic...
"STOP BLOWING HOLES IN MY SHIP!!!!!
-Jack Sparrow, POTC: Curse Of The Black Pearl

One line I'll always remember from Tiberian Sun, spoken by some nameless grunt;

"Where the HELL are those reinforcements?!"

Original Half Life...


"My God! WHAT are you doing?"

Yeah, I heard that alot.

"They're only people."
-- Biroc, Warrior's Gate

"Certainty of death...Small chance of success...What are we waiting for?"
"Nobody tosses a dwarf!"
"Don't tell the elf."  All Gimli, from Lord of the Rings

GIMLI: Legolas! I've got two already!
LEGOLAS: I'm on thirteen!
GIMLI: WHA?!? I'll have no pointy-ear outscoring me! RRRAAARRGGGHH!!! *Chops an Uruk in the crotch with his waraxe*

Ellie: Thank God!
Lucifer: Thank WHO!?

~"Even if we never find out why we exist, we can choose to give our lives meaning."

*Garek and Dukat, two Cardassians, are on DS9 fighting off hoards of invading Klingons. Garek has a Cardy phaser and is blasting Klingons left and right, while Dukat is stuck wrestling with a Klingon over his bat'leth blade thingy. And FYI, a Cardassian "interrogation chamber" is really a torture chamber*


GAREK: *yelling* You know, I find all this hand-to-hand combat really quite distasteful!*Blasts a Klingon*
DUKAT: *wrestling with aformention Klingon over aformentioned bat'leth, and also yelling* I suppose you prefer the simplicity, *manages to get the bat'leth* of an interrogation chamber! *beheads the Klingon*
GAREK: *still yelling* You have to admit, it's much more civilized!!! *blasts another Klingon*

QuoteOh lord have mercy sweet jesus on the cross with mary and josepth with the moses in the ocean with the pretty fishes and the meanie sharks and the abc's 123's my grandma can kill your grandma and daddy's in the bed half way dead, mother's in the kitchen cookin' fried chicken, sisters at school acting like a fool brother at work acting like a jerk and good lord that friggin' hurt!

mine :3

Quote from: Xze-Xze on June 20, 2007, 02:29:20 AMOh lord have mercy sweet jesus on the cross with mary and josepth with the moses in the ocean with the pretty fishes and the meanie sharks and the abc's 123's my grandma can kill your grandma and daddy's in the bed half way dead, mother's in the kitchen cookin' fried chicken, sisters at school acting like a fool brother at work acting like a jerk and good lord that friggin' hurt!

Been reading Sam and Max?

Hello? Yes, Commissioner! Yes?... Yes?... Yes?.. Holy jumping mother o' God in a side-car with chocolate jimmies and a lobster bib! WE'RE ON OUR WAY! --Sam

Quote from: superluser on June 20, 2007, 02:45:58 AM

Quote from: Xze-Xze on June 20, 2007, 02:29:20 AMOh lord have mercy sweet jesus on the cross with mary and josepth with the moses in the ocean with the pretty fishes and the meanie sharks and the abc's 123's my grandma can kill your grandma and daddy's in the bed half way dead, mother's in the kitchen cookin' fried chicken, sisters at school acting like a fool brother at work acting like a jerk and good lord that friggin' hurt!

Been reading Sam and Max?

Hello? Yes, Commissioner! Yes?... Yes?... Yes?.. Holy jumping mother o' God in a side-car with chocolate jimmies and a lobster bib! WE'RE ON OUR WAY! --Sam

AH-HAH!!!!

i knew i got that from somewhere...now how did i remember it 0o

Diana: Don't You take vacations?
Clark Kent: Vacations don't get the story written. I'm a newspaperman; I'll take a vacation when I die.

main Baddie, can't remember his name: "On your tombstone, it should read 'Always in the wrong place at the wrong time.'"

John McClane: "How about Yippey-Kai-Yay Mother-(Censored)?" BANG!

From Live Free or Die Hard

Worf: "No, sir. It is a Gorche."

Picard: *Odd Look*

Data: *Whispers* "Pimple."

Picard: "Oh. Well, it's, ah, hardly noticeable."

Riker: "Wow, you Klingons never do anything small, do you?"

From Star Trek TNG, one of the movies.

Any exclamation from TSOALR; "Emperor's Individual Component List!" (http://tsoalr.com/view.php?date=2007-05-03) :B

--

James T. Kirk: [Happy to see no Tribbles in his command chair] I don't see any Tribbles around here.
Leonard McCoy: And you won't find a Tribble on this entire ship, Jim.
James T. Kirk: Bones, how'd you do that?
Leonard McCoy: Well, I cannot take credit for another man's work. Scotty did it.
James T. Kirk: Scotty! Where are the tribbles?
Montgomery Scott: Oh, uh, Captain, it was really Mr. Spock's recommendation.
James T. Kirk: Of course. Spock?
Spock: Based on computer analysis, of course, taking into account the possibilities of...
James T. Kirk: Gentlemen, I don't want to interrupt this mutual admiration society, but I'd like to know where the tribbles are.
Leonard McCoy: Tell him, Spock.
Spock: Well, it was Mr. Scott who performed the actual engineering.
James T. Kirk: Mr. Scott. [Articulately] Where are the tribbles?
Montgomery Scott: I used the transporter, Captain.
James T. Kirk: [Confused] You used the transporter?
Montgomery Scott: Aye.
James T. Kirk: Well, where did you transport them?
[Scotty looks around, and then everybody else looks elsewhere...]
James T. Kirk: Scott, you didn't transport them into space, did you?
Montgomery Scott: Captain Kirk, that'd be inhuman.
James T. Kirk: Well, where are they?
Montgomery Scott: I gave them a very good home, sir.
James T. Kirk: [Furious] Where?!
Montgomery Scott: I gave them to the Klingons, sir.
James T. Kirk: [Incrediously] You gave them to the Klingons?!
Montgomery Scott: Aye, sir. Before they went into warp, I transported the whole kit and caboodle into their engine room, where they'll be no tribble at all.

Some from Yu-Gi-Oh abridged...Because Little Kuriboh is a God.

Yugi:: Grandpa! Are you okay?!
Solomon Moto: For some reason playing a card game has caused me to become severely injured!
Seto Kaiba: That's right. And now, watch this! [rips Blue-Eyes White Dragon card in half]
Yugi: Grandpa's special super-rare awesome super-card!
Joey: What the heck did you do that for?
Seto Kaiba: So that it can never be used against me.
Yugi: In that case, why not just tear up every card in the whole world?
Seto Kaiba: Shut up and duel me.
Yugi: Don't worry, grandpa. I'll win this duel with your deck!
Solomon Moto: Wait-wait a minute. I've been injured, so you're going to steal my deck and go play cards with your arch-rival?
Yugi: Pretty much.
Solomon Moto: No wonder your parents are never around!

Yami-Yugi: Wait a minute, did you just summon a bunch of monsters in one turn?
Seto Kaiba: Yeah, so?
Yami-Yugi: That's against the rules, isn't it?
Seto Kaiba: Screw the rules, I have money.

Solomon Moto:I hope this isn't one of those cursed video tapes that are all the rage these days.
Pegasus: Seven days..
Solomon Moto: Oh snap, I knew it!

Téa: Come on Tristan! Let's sneak on board like Solid Snake!
Tristan: Don't our parents even care that we're missing?

Yami Yugi: You're some kind of moron, you know that?
Mokuba: A moron who has all your star chips!
Yami Yugi: DAMN that kid moves fast!
Mokuba: Stealing makes everything better
Yami Yugi: Wait, Mokuba! You mustn't do this thing. Think. What would your brother say if he saw you now?
Seto Kaiba: [in thought bubble] Well done, Mokuba. Now steal something from Joey too!
Yami Yugi: Okay, but what would he say if he wasn't a complete douchebag?

Yami Yugi: Aha! See? You're not a ghost at all! You're some kind of... gay clown apparently.

Ninjabear.  She doesn't make bear noises, so she is stealthy and silent, but if you provoke her, she will maul you horribly.
-Matt Wiggins(www.loadingreadyrun.com)

--Which is no mean feat for a country which probably has 'iron grip monopoly' fetish videos.
-Grahm Stark(of the same)

"No, Bumblebee...No lubricating on the humans!"
-Optimus Prime, Transformers Movie (2007)

(Yeah, I saw the movie...and I enjoyed it)

"I am...................
















CAPTAIN COMMANDO"

Quote from: KarlOmega1 on July 03, 2007, 11:54:24 PM
"No, Bumblebee...No lubricating on the humans!"
-Optimus Prime, Transformers Movie (2007)

(Yeah, I saw the movie...and I enjoyed it)

That sounds... WRONG somehow.

"Docter P. is in the house!"
"Stop that."
-Rikku and Paine, FFX2

"Lets see here, who's the most celebrated celebrity..."
"Yuna, run!"
-Tobil and Paine, FFX2

"Time to play, pendejo!"
~ Elvis, God Hand

"You little fool. Don't you understand how powerful I am?"
"Oh, yeah. Sorry for waking you, but don't worry. I'll tuck you right back into bed soon enough..."
~ Angra and Gene, God Hand

"Together we are the... MAD! MIDGET! FIVE!" *ting*
"....douchebags!"
~ The MMV and Gene, God Hand (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0u4hxDT_i9E)

[after Rocco gets his finger shot off]
Rocco: Feels like it's still there.
Connor: Yeah, well it's not.

Connor, Murphy, Il Duce: And shepherds we shall be, For thee my lord for thee. Power has descended forth from thy hand, that our feet may swiftly carry out thy commands. So we shall flow a river forth to thee, and teeming with souls shall it ever be.
Il Duce: In nomine Patri
Connor: Et Fili
Murphy: Spiritus Sancti

I love Boondock Saints. Connor and Murphy are so cute! lol

Why do you guys always ask about bombs and stuff?
-Dr. Evan McHugh

If she threatens to kill me, I will NOT be held responsible for my actions!

Excuse me, why are you shooting at me?

Where is my question?


(credit for these last 3 is difficult to assign...)

From Metal Gear Solid 2 Sons Of Liberty:

Otacon: Ha ha. You know, you're a pretty interesting guy. You're just like Snake said.
Raiden: ...What did he say?
Otacon: That you're a weak, simple-minded, stubborn fool.
Raiden: A-a weak simple minded...
Otacon: Ah, don't worry, he didn't mean anything bad by it.
Raiden: "Nothing Bad"? What could possibly be worse that that? That lying, useless, backstabbing, mincing son of a --
Otacon: Raiden, I'm his friend. I know him better than anyone else. I know he's not that kind of guy.
Raiden: Yeah? So what?
Otacon:   And, by the way... there's one more thing you should probably know about Snake.
Raiden: What?
Otacon: He's right here.
Raiden: ...Next to you?
Otacon: Yep.
Raiden: Did he hear...
Otacon: Every word.
Snake: *very un-amused look*
Raiden: I'm, uh... I'm just gonna get back to the mission now.

"We're missing something"
"Oxygen is so important during those prepubescent years, don't you think?"
- House MD

Quote from: KarlOmega1 on July 03, 2007, 11:54:24 PM
"No, Bumblebee...No lubricating on the humans!"
-Optimus Prime, Transformers Movie (2007)

Wait, WHAT?

Go watch the movie. :P It will all make sense then.

well, obviously, it's supposed to be a drop-in replacement for "urinating," but it sounds like something XXX-rated.

The entire ending credits sequence of God Hand (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIhguaHzspY)

The 80s strike back, with an ohsoquotable ending song.

(Also, to any of the above, it's "Bumblebee, stop lubricating the man.")

there is so much darkness in the world, who you you to try and shed some light? ( not sure why i said it he had something to do with DDR's status.)

You cannot kill the wind with bullets!
-Otto von Rientahl

"Never argue with and idiot, they will just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." - God I wish I knew where I got this but I've always found it to be true.

BROM: You can't argue with all the fools in the world. It's best to just let them have their way, then trick them when they're not looking. *holds out handful of gold coins*
ERAGON: *incredulously* You cut his purse!

I vaguely remember a great quote by someone who was complaining to the FSF.  It went something like the following:

...so I had this issue and I one of your members--a guy named rms--answered my question.  He was very rude and insulting, and I was offended.  I really think you need to talk to this rms guy.  Maybe he needs to be fired.

:giggle

DRIX: Hey, look at that! *makes to grab a pollen pod*
OSMOSIS: *grabs it away* Hey, be careful, that's a pollen pod! Man, Frank is totally allergic to this stuff!
DRIX: Huh? I didn't know Frank had allergies.
OSMOSIS: 'Course you didn't! *begins wrapping up the pod* *under breath* Stupid pill knows nuthin' 'bout what's goin' on around here, *pod pops out of Osmosis's arms, flies down Frank's nostril* WHOOPS!
DRIX: Uh, Jones?!? *points at pod*
OSMOSIS: *stares at pod* ...In the words of the immortal James Brown, git down!!
DRIX: ...James who?
FRANK: Ah...Ah...AH-CHOOO!
-Osmosis Jones

DMFA 532 (http://www.missmab.com/Comics/Vol_532.php)

"I, along with my broken lungs..."

DMFA 548 (http://www.missmab.com/Comics/Vol_548.php)

"I swear when I can open my eyes again I'm going to kill you!!!"

The following quote has been modified from it's original version.  It has been formatted to comply with forum ratings. :3


Pete: It's four in the fudging morning!
Shaun: It's Saturday!
Pete: No, it's not. It's fudging Sunday. And I've got to go to fudging work in four fudging hours 'cos every other fudger in my fudging department is fudging ill! Now can you see why I'm SO FUDGING ANGRY?
Ed: Fudge, yeah!

-Shaun of the Dead

In Blackest Day, In Brightest Night
Beware your fears turned into light
Let those who try to stop what's right
Burn like my power...
SINESTRO'S MIGHT!

Burke: He can't make that kind of decision, he's just a grunt! Ah, no offense.
Hicks: None taken.

Quote from: King Of Hearts on July 10, 2007, 08:10:39 AM
You cannot kill the wind with bullets!
-Otto von Rientahl

Counter!

"Your sky ends here."
~ Nancy Makuhari

dang... umm... umm

COUNTER!

"Spare her? But that would be inconvienient. I;ll simply take her DNA and make a clone... just like what I did to you."
-umm... that guy who lead the I-jin.

(Ikkyu Soujun. That was his name. He sounded like Hannibal Lecter with an American accent.  :))

"This is anyone here two and a half hours into a game of Monopoly... *BWOOOSH* F&$# this game! It's four in the mornin' Grandma, YOU WIN!"
-Dane Cook

"Put your clothes back on. We're gonna cut your balls off."
-House. (He has some of the best quotes ever.)

Can anyone do a really good quote from Fight Club? I can't think of one, but I wanna do one.

Quote from: Black_angel on July 21, 2007, 07:09:22 PMCan anyone do a really good quote from Fight Club? I can't think of one, but I wanna do one.

Guy: I'm not disclosed to bespeak any such information to you, nor would I, even if I had said information you want, at this juncture be able.
Narrator: You're a moron

Edit:

I've always been partial to

In the world I see -- you're stalking elk through the damp canyon forests around the ruins of Rockefeller Center.  You will wear leather clothes that last you the rest of your life.  You will climb the wrist-thick kudzu vines that wrap the Sears Tower.  You will see tiny figures pounding corn and laying-strips of venison on the empty car pool lane of the ruins of a superhighway.

Nicely done.

And now, for a few more funny ones.

"Who the f*^& steals a monkey?"
(Silent Bob points to himself and Jay)
"Oh yeah."

-Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

"Dumb.

Tough.

Flies.

On fire.

'nuff said."
~ Doom II manual entry on the Lost Soul

Joker:You had a bad day once, am I right? I know I am. I can tell. You had a bad day and everything changed—why else would you dress up like a flying rat? You had a bad day, and it drove you as crazy as everybody else...only you won't admit it! You have to keep pretending that life makes sense; that there's some point to all this struggling! God, you make me want to puke...It's all a joke! Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for...it's all a monstrous, demented gag! So why can't you see the funny side? Why aren't you laughing?

Batman: Because I've heard it all before...and it wasn't funny the first time.

"Yesterday, I saw the Body of the Bridgekeeper engulfed in flame, and I saw the Bridge created by one-third.

Tomorrow, I saw the Soul of the Bridgekeeper reduced to ash, and I saw the Bridge created by two-thirds.

Today, the Mind of the Bridgekeeper shall meet with its destiny, and I shall see the Bridge extend between the realms.

And the many children of the King will leap and dance and sing praise in His name, for great is His wisdom and His benevolence."

-- the Book of the Bridge.

Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight!" We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!

-Independence Day

Grate speech IMO

I loved that speech to, as well as the whole movie. It was beautifully awsome.

from matt gardner's flash on newgrounds emma frost mentioned a tern i will use for all my days


crotch spawn! it sounds so weird and insulting it's cool!

Quote from: lucas marcone on July 25, 2007, 01:51:34 AMcrotch spawn! it sounds so weird and insulting it's cool!

I remember that there was a blog out there called Reagan Babies.  Some wags took to calling it Gipper's Groin Spawn.

Kamina from Gurren Lagann.

-Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me. who believes in you!

-WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM!?

-Take your drill... AND PIERCE TROUGH THE HEAVENS!

"Did somebody order a Warthog?"
"Hey I didn't know you made house calls, Foehammer!"
"You know our model: We deliver!"
:B

HALO FTW!!!!!
And it's 'motto', not 'model', lol.

Sgt. Johnson: Men, here's where we show those split-chin, squid-head sons of bitches that they could not have picked a worse enemy than the Human race.  We are going to blow the hell out of those dumb bugs until we don't have anything left to shoot 'em with, and then we are are going to strangle them with their own, living guts!  ...Am I right, Marines?!
Marines: Sir, yes Sir!
Sgt. Johnson: Mmhm, damn right I am!  Now move it out!  Double-time!

Alternatively:

Sgt. Johnson: Men, we led those dumb bugs out to the middle of nowhere to keep them from getting their filthy claws on Earth, but we stumbled onto something so hot for them, they're scrambling over each other to get it.  Well, I don't care if it's God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine or a giant hula hoop, we're not gonna let 'em have it!  What we will let 'em have is a belly full o' lead and a pool of their own blood to drown in! ...Am I right, Marines?!
Marines: Sir, yes Sir!
Sgt. Johnson: Mmhm, damn right I am!  Now move it out!  Double-time!


I was laughing for like five minutes when I first heard, "God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine." :lol

AAAHAHAHARRRGGH!! Why didn't I think of posting those quotes? Dammit!

Just ran across this one:

Q: Can anybody recommend how to read Gravity's Rainbow?
A: Yes.  Lie back and think of England.

"Not again!"

:B

"Wort wort wort!"

"WAAAAAAAAARRGH!" - best death noise ever. Stick a 'leet with a plasma grenade or clip it with a rocket. Enjoy. :U

I think I like men now.
-Ralph Wiggum.

Somebody throw the God DAMNED BOMB!
-Marge Simpson

gee thanks for the spoiler warning

Quote from: Arcalane link=topic=2896.msg135065#msg135065
i]"WAAAAAAAAARRGH!"[/i] - best death noise ever. Stick a 'leet with a plasma grenade or clip it with a rocket. Enjoy. :U

Most satisfying, too.

"I don't want to scare anybody, but all this blood over here is actually mine."
-I recall neither the character, nor the game.  I have a friend who does, though.

Quote from: Raist on July 26, 2007, 05:40:19 PM

Quote from: Arcalane link=topic=2896.msg135065#msg135065
"WAAAAAAAAARRGH!" - best death noise ever. Stick a 'leet with a plasma grenade or clip it with a rocket. Enjoy. :U

Most satisfying, too.

Indeed.  Every time I kill an Elite, I hope it makes that noise. >:3

Same here :3

I would be a Scotch-Irish on the rocks if I jumped off a cliff.
-Jacob Rice(author of the Karnak Hates Everything show)

Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

William Shakespeare's Macbeth, Act V, scene V



And one that always goes through my head when I'm feeling a little nutty.


"Sometime you feel like a... some time you don't."
80's Almond joy and Mounds commercial

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open manhole and die."
-Mel Brooks

Quote from: King Of Hearts on July 27, 2007, 06:05:40 AM"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open manhole and die."
-Mel Brooks

I find that this quote works extremely well if you say it completely deadpand and then walk away before anyone can start to laugh.

Quote from: xHaZxMaTx on July 26, 2007, 05:46:58 PM

Quote from: Raist on July 26, 2007, 05:40:19 PM

Quote from: Arcalane on July 26, 2007, 05:40:32 AM
"WAAAAAAAAARRGH!" - best death noise ever. Stick a 'leet with a plasma grenade or clip it with a rocket. Enjoy. :U

Most satisfying, too.

Indeed.  Every time I kill an Elite, I hope it makes that noise. >:3

Well, as the extended version goes in one game I had;

Elite: "WAAAAAAAAARRGH!"
*CRUNCH*
Me: "Whoa! That one nearly landed on the bridge there!... shame there was that glass wall in the way, I guess."

:B (I was of course running around with a Rocket Launcher on that one part where there's two bridges above a canyon. The ends at the canyon walls are shielded by walls and big glass plates. One Elite was blasted clear of one side and flew across, flailing wildly until smashing into a glass plate on the opposite bridge.)

"Thank you for summoning us, Jackie. How may we serve you today?"
"The usual."
"Very good, sir."
Jackie and a Darkling, The Darkness: Level 2

Quote from: Arcalane on July 27, 2007, 11:50:33 AM
:B (I was of course running around with a Rocket Launcher on that one part where there's two bridges above a canyon. The ends at the canyon walls are shielded by walls and big glass plates. One Elite was blasted clear of one side and flew across, flailing wildly until smashing into a glass plate on the opposite bridge.)

one of the two-bridges sections in Assault on the Control Room.  Contrary to what many say, I believe this level, not the Library, is the longest, most boring level in the game.

Maybe, but that's why you steal one of the banshees on the bridge in front of the control room, instead of walking. :3  There's also a way to get a 'Shee at, like, the very beginning of the level, but I've nver been able to do it.  Ah, but we're getting off-topic...

I always did steal the Banshee, I thought it was part of the regular level.  I still thought AOTC was way too long and boring!

I think it's because you drive the Tank.  Scorpions don't move any faster than Spartans on foot, they've just got more firepower to them.

Hence, to fight and conquer in all your battles is not supreme excellence; supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy's resistance without fighting.
-The Art of War (III. 2)

Quote from: Raist on July 28, 2007, 01:50:51 PM
I always did steal the Banshee, I thought it was part of the regular level.  I still thought AOTC was way too long and boring!

I think it's because you drive the Tank.  Scorpions don't move any faster than Spartans on foot, they've just got more firepower to them.

First response to acquiring ze tank; insane giggling and grinning.

Quote from: Arcalane on July 28, 2007, 02:34:30 PM

Quote from: Raist on July 28, 2007, 01:50:51 PM
I always did steal the Banshee, I thought it was part of the regular level.  I still thought AOTC was way too long and boring!

I think it's because you drive the Tank.  Scorpions don't move any faster than Spartans on foot, they've just got more firepower to them.

First response to acquiring ze tank; insane giggling and grinning.

Wraith tanks, yeah.  I love indirect fire and boost.  Scorpions, not so much.  I prefer the Warthog, myself.(roadkill!)

I used to hate Wraiths, Scorpions were always the way to got for me. Their direct firepower surpasses that of the Wraith, and they have a machinegun. I hated the Wraiths because I thought them to be sluggish, clunky, and the slow-moving projectile moving in a parabolic trajectory was quite a detriment.

But my feelings for the wraith changed completely when, on the map kinda like a wasteland with a crashed human cruiser next to a building, I got into a wraith, piloted it up to the split hill behind the two indestructable, immovable Covenant comm drop-pods, and killed my friend 16 times in a row. It was all thanks to the parabola of the plasma mortar. i could never have performed that feat with a Scorpion. That was a happy day for me. :boogie



But to get back on topic, here's a quote:

Dangit, Jim! I'm an astronamer, not a doctor! I mean, well yes, I'm a doctor, but I'm not that kind of a doctor, I have a doctorate, it's not the same thing, you can't help people with a doctorate, you just sit there and you're useless!
-Doctor Doppler, Treasure Planet

 Counter to Llearch a while back.

"I say we take off, nuke the entire site from orbit. Only way to be sure."

And I raise:

"Another glorious day in the Corps! Every meal is a banquet, every paycheck is a treasure, and every full march is a parade!"

Quote from: Raist on July 28, 2007, 04:10:34 AM

Quote from: Arcalane on July 27, 2007, 11:50:33 AM
:B (I was of course running around with a Rocket Launcher on that one part where there's two bridges above a canyon. The ends at the canyon walls are shielded by walls and big glass plates. One Elite was blasted clear of one side and flew across, flailing wildly until smashing into a glass plate on the opposite bridge.)

one of the two-bridges sections in Assault on the Control Room.  Contrary to what many say, I believe this level, not the Library, is the longest, most boring level in the game.

terrible level, terrible terrible level.


To be honest, 343 and The Maw were the only levels I really enjoyed in Halo. Library wasn't as bad as everyone said, though.

Quote from: BillBuckner on July 28, 2007, 07:13:35 PM

Quote from: Raist on July 28, 2007, 04:10:34 AM

Quote from: Arcalane on July 27, 2007, 11:50:33 AM
:B (I was of course running around with a Rocket Launcher on that one part where there's two bridges above a canyon. The ends at the canyon walls are shielded by walls and big glass plates. One Elite was blasted clear of one side and flew across, flailing wildly until smashing into a glass plate on the opposite bridge.)

one of the two-bridges sections in Assault on the Control Room.  Contrary to what many say, I believe this level, not the Library, is the longest, most boring level in the game.

terrible level, terrible terrible level.

Also haet SPNKr-wielding FCFs in the second part where you're on that map and have to blow up the Pulse Generators or whatever they are. :B

Quote from: TheGreyRonin on July 28, 2007, 06:47:03 PM
And I raise:

"Another glorious day in the Corps! Every meal is a banquet, every paycheck is a treasure, and every full march is a parade!"

"All right, sweethearts, what are you waiting for? Breakfast in bed? Another glorious day in the corps! A day in the Marine Corps is like a day on the farm. Every meal's a banquet! Every paycheck a fortune! Every formation a parade! I LOVE the corps!"

And I riposte:

Hudson: Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
Vasquez: No. Have you?

And follow that with:

Hudson: Man, this floor is freezing.
Apone: What do you want me to do, fetch your slippers for you?
Hudson: Gee, would you sir? I'd like that.
[Apone points at his face with middle finger]
Apone: Look into my eye.


Ah, shucks. So many great lines, so little time...

If we're doing Alien quotes...

Oh, no.  Not again.
-- John Hurt

Oh no, not again.
-The Bowl of Petunias, Hitchhiker's Guid To The Galaxy

EDIT: My bad. Petunias it is.
And what the heck would you be spoiling?

Quote from: techmaster-glitch on July 29, 2007, 09:12:40 PMOh no, not again.
-The Bowl of Porridge, Hitchhiker's Guid To The Galaxy

That would be petunias, and...well, I can't say more without spoiling.

Ah, that reminds me of 'The Thing'.

Oh, you gotta be f***ing kidding me.

ZEEK BOOGY DOOG!-Zeeky H. Bomb

Quote from: Zedd on July 30, 2007, 01:59:05 AM
ZEEK BOOGY DOOG!-Zeeky H. Bomb

THE DEMENTED CARTOON MOVIE FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blah! *BOOM*

I'm SuperBlah!

Bring out the Auto-Romeo Maker!

Bring out the Auto Damsel-In-Distress-Maker!

I'm bored.
Me too.
You wanna do something?
I don't know, what?
Neither do I...
Hey I know, Let's play 'toss the H-bomb!'
Yeah!
WHEEEEEE!
BOOOM.

"If sacred places are spared the ravages of war... then make all places sacred. And if the holy people are to be kept harmless from war... then make all peoples holy."

you have to throw out the old version before starting ie 4. Ms has a version on their site that fixes the mail security bug. check it out.
- Koko the Gorilla, during Clinton's deposition to Kenneth Starr

"That's not a gun. That's a bag of crack rocks."

"if people had to make sense then they wouldn't be people" Dawn of Dawn and Dusk.

The Demon Etrigan, after being tortured and asked to ally with  Nazi demons in Hell.


Now, my haughty aryan friend,
let me consider your offer again.
The Kings of hate-- you say that's you?
And Iv'e got a chance to be one too?
Let me try to put you straight
on what is and is not hate.

This is the thrust behind thy ranting:
"He's Brown, She's red, his eyes are slanting.
Thank God were off better than her!
Those foreigners are wose than curs!"

"My life's become a pile of crap--
It's that guy's fault for being black.
They come here and take our jobs!'
Of course they do, you lazy slobs!

Let Etrigan show you the light,
That isnt hate... that's naught but spite.

Rancid, Lousy, Demon traitor!
Lord of the Lowest denominator!
You're to blamed for your life of crap!

And what you need... is Slapped, SLAPPED, SLAPPED!

"Glitch, anything!!!" -Bob, from Reboot.

"you have what you need now use his greed" Fong, form reboot

We are morons tried and true,
and we will do our yell for you
tjudh,kadbckbval;sghzsflbvgzj

-Larry, Moe, and Curly

Quote from: superluser on August 02, 2007, 02:34:10 AM
you have to throw out the old version before starting ie 4. Ms has a version on their site that fixes the mail security bug. check it out.
- Koko the Gorilla, during Clinton's deposition to Kenneth Starr

.... Was that a joke or not?

Meh. On with the quotation devices!

I'm so not typing this whole scene from Family Guy. So here it is on YouTube.  (http://youtube.com/watch?v=513-PI_bpOs&mode=related&search=)

Quote from: Black_angel on August 08, 2007, 05:15:51 PM

Quote from: superluser on August 02, 2007, 02:34:10 AMyou have to throw out the old version before starting ie 4. Ms has a version on their site that fixes the mail security bug. check it out.
- Koko the Gorilla, during Clinton's deposition to Kenneth Starr

.... Was that a joke or not?

No joke (http://web.archive.org/web/20010418214541/www.feedmag.com/html/feature/98.08bill/98.08bill_lofi.html).  (Contains technical sexual terms.  Like you'd expect with the Starr report)

I'm sorry, Isilis, but your character is just too weird. Farmers with attack rams and people bit by radioactive bombs are already pushing it, but I don't think I could fit your weremoose into the game without completely blowing immersion.
-Snikers(Gone with the Blastwave forum RP)

"Drop your inhibitions, kids, come and bathe in the sunshine of my love."
-Murdoc Niccals, Gorillaz: Rise of the Ogre

"***** owed me money..."
- Terrorist bark, commenting on fallen comrade. Rainbow Six Vegas.

"i'm useless but not fore long. the future is coming on." Gorillaz: Clint Eastwood

"I know you don't want to die tonight. (Pause. He smirks) Do you want to come with me?"
- Alucard, first episode of the short-lived Hellsing TV series. Even I know the TV series wasn't that great, but that quote still gets me.

"See me ride out after sunset on your/ Color TV screen/ Out for all that I can get/ If you know what I mean"
-TNT, AC/DC

"You're supposed to be the good cop, motherfucker!"
-Herc, "The Wire"

SARGENT: What the hell is going on, Marvin?
MARVIN: I'm on break sir!
SARGENT: You're not on break until I tell you you're on break!
MARVIN: But sir, you authorized me for this break.
SARGENT: Well then the break's over!
MARVIN: God dammit.
SARGENT: What was that?
MARVIN: God dammit, sir.
SARGENT: The rank structure was made for a reason!
The StarCrafter: Episode 001

"There is nothing wrong with your television set.  Do not attempt to adjust the picture.  We are controlling transmission.  If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume.  If we wish to make it softer, we will tune it to a whisper.  We will control the horizontal.  We will control the vertical.  We can roll the image; make it flutter.  We can change the focus to a soft blur or sharpen it to crystal clarity.  For the next hour, sit quietly and we will control all that you see and hear.  We repeat: there is nothing wrong with your television set.  You are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the inner mind... to the Outer Limits."

-intro, The Outer Limits

"he's got a little list he's got a little list
And they'd none of them be missed
they'd none of them be missed." Cecil 21st century  fox (http://techfox.comicgenesis.com/d/20001127.html)

Listen up, you scheming fools - no excuses, and no more lies. (Giovanni!)
You've heard my most ingenious plan; I demand the ultimate prize! (Giovanni!)

Now bring me the yellow Pokemon, and bear witness when I speak... (Giovanni!)
I shall possess the awesome power in Pikachu's rosy cheeks. (Giovanni!)

There'll be world domination, complete obliteration, of all who now defy me -
Let the universe prepare!  Good Pokemon beware!  You fools shall not deny me!

It will all be mine!  Powers so divine!
I'll tell the sun to shine on only me!
It will all be mine!  'Till the end of time!
When this perfect crime makes his-to-ry!

Team Rocket...
THIS IS OUR DESTINY!

-Giovanni, "It Will All Be Mine", Pokemon Live

Quote from: Dr. Rumack - AirplaneI just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.

And of course:

Quote from: Dr. Rumack - AirplaneI just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.

Oh, and who can forget:

Quote from: Dr. Rumack - AirplaneI just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.

Ah, Airplane!

McCroskey: Johnny, what can you make out of this?
Johnny: This?  Oh, I can make a hat, or a brooch, or a pterodactyl...

Kramer: Its his ship now, his command, he's in charge, he's the boss, head man, top dog, big cheese, head honcho, number...

Johnny: There's a sale at Penny's!

Voiceman: The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only, there is no stopping in the white zone.
Voiclady: NO! The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading and there is no stopping in the red zone.
Voiceman: The red zone has always been for loading and unloading there is never stopping in a white zone.
Voiclady: Don't tell me which zone is for stopping and which zone is for loading.
Voiceman: Listen Betty, don't start up with your white zone sh*t again!  There's just no stopping in a white zone.
Voiclady: Oh really, Vernon, why pretend, we both know perfectly well what it is you're talking about. You want me to have an abortion.
Voiceman: Its really the only sensible thing to do. If its done properly, therapeutically, there's no danger involved.

It's a big building with ..., but that's not important right now.

Listen, kid!  I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA.  I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lenier up and down the court for 48 minutes.

Joey, you ever seen a grown man naked?

"Today is my birthday. And for the first time in twenty years.... I am not alone. You see, I met someone.... a man.... a killer. And soon, he will kill me..."
Emu O'Hara, Crying Freeman (movie)

"I remember the night of my twenty-first birthday. That was the first time I died."
Jackie Estacado, The Darkness

And anything by Sheogorath in the Shivering Isles expansion of Oblivion.

"Ta! Come visit again, or I'll pluck out yer eyes!"

Darkseid: Damn your forgiveness! Take this cur from my sight. She is exliled from Apokolips, never to return! Let her make her way on your squald planet since she is not fit to live in mine.

Metron: Mercy, Darkseid?
Spetcre: Forgiveness?

Darkseid: I FORGIVE NOTHING! THERE IS NO FORGIVENESS! She is banished into chaos and fear and despair! Here there is order and meaning! Too late will she learn that paradise is now lost to her forever!

Death is easy! Death is an escape! Death is insufficient punishment!

I CONDEMN HER TO LIFE!

I conemn her to hope, and strugle, and despair! I condemn her to freedom ans all of its horrors!





Now begone... you sully my handiwork.

Crack makes everything funnier. (http://www.landrymanor.com/ragefactor/like%20crack.mp3)

It's a bit on the quiet side, but you can hear what's said.

"Transient guests are we."
~ Vampire Hunter D

CASEY: Look's like you're the one who needs to be taught a lesson. *pulls out dual baseball bats* Class is Pain 101. You're instructor is Casey Jones.
RAPH: Look, I don't wanna fight you.
CASEY: Meh, tough rocks, pal. *swing, swing, swing, Raph catches the bat and looks at it*
RAPH: A Jose Cansaco bat?!? Tell me-ya didn't pay money for this.
CASEY: Oooh! Thats IT! *thwacks Raph across the back with the bat, dropping it and knocking off Raphs hat*
CASEY: Was a two-for-one sale, pal. *Raph startes to get up, Casey gets a look at Raph's now-revealed face* Hey what are ya, some sort of punker? *Raph picks up the bat* I hate punkers...*looks closer*...Especially...bald ones...with green makeup...who wear masks over ugly faces...
RAPH: New batter! *swing*
CASEY: Strike one!
RAPH: *swings again*
CASEY: Woo, wiffer!
RAPH: *jumps over Casey, then thwacks him on the back, knocking him down* Raphael wins! One-nothing!
CASEY: *rushes back up* New game, roundhead. *pulls new sports implement from his backpack* Cricket!
RAPH: Cricket?!? Nobody understands cricket! Y'gotta know what a crumpet is, t'understand cricket!
CASEY: I'll teach you! *THWAM*

-The old, original, good, 80's Teenage Muntant Ninja Turtles Movie

'The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common:  They don't alter their veiws to fit the facts.  They alter the facts to fit their views.  Which can be particularly uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that needs adjustment.'  Dr. Who - 'The Face of Evil'

Dot: Oh my...two Bobs! How can this be?
Enzo/Matrix: Don't ask us...


(Reboot season 4 episode : My Two Bobs.)

lol i loved that episode

"Whoever said that the law is supposed to be for the sane?" Scott Kellogg

Spoilers for "watchmen"













There is evil, and evil must be punished. Even in the face of Armageddon, I shall not compromise this.
-Rorschach

then a second later he is blown up into a bloody pulp by a virtual deity.

Quote from: King Of Hearts on August 31, 2007, 02:57:14 AM
Spoilers for "watchmen"

Damnit, you made me go and pull out the graphic novel for re-reading purposes. Whee, spoilers!


















Inside
"Rorschach...? Rorschach, wait! Where are you going? This is too big to be hard-assed about! We have to compromise!"
"No. Not even in the face of Armageddon. Never compromise."

And Outside
"Where are you going?"
"Back to Owlship. Back to America. Evil must be punished. People must be told."
"Rorschach.... you know I can't let you do that."
"Huhhh. Of course. Must protect Veidt's new utopia. One more body amongst foundations makes little difference. Well? What are you waiting for? Do it."
"Rorschach..."
"DO IT!"

*sploit*

Doc Manhattan FTW.


and while were doing Alan Moore...

"I did it thirty-five minutes ago."
-Ozzymandias

"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you, and you may call me V."
-Codename V

In loudest din or hush profound
my ears hear evil's slightest sound
let those who toll out evil's knell
beware my power, the F-Sharp Bell!
-Rot Lop Fan, the blind Green Lantern

Not a Moore work, but glorious and entertaining to boot...

Did you ever want to set someone's head on fire, just to see what it looked like? Did you ever stand in the street and think to youtself, I could make that nun go blind just by giving her a kiss? Did you ever lay out plans for stitching babies and stray cats into a Perfect New Human? Did you ever stand naked surrounded by people who want your gleaming sperm, squirting frankincense, soma and testosterone from every pore?

If so, then you're the bastard who stole my drugs Friday night.

And I'll find you. Oh, yes.
~ Spider Jerusalem, Transmetropolitan

"Jack Black, allow me to introduce you to a brick wall.  Brick wall, this is Jack Black.  Well, now, I'm afraid I have to run, so I'll leave you two to get acquainted." comic voice over by Scott Kellogg

"you see,wire telegraph is a kind of very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they recieve them there. The only difference is there is no cat." - Albert Einstien

"Of all God`s creatures,there is only one that cannot be made slaves of the leash.That one is the cat.If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man,but it would deteriorate the cat." Mark Twain

(as the Doctor is about to leave for Antarctica)
Dunbar: Are you leaving immediately?
The Doctor: Why not? Got my toothbrush. (holds it up and grins)

(A few seconds and words later, once the doctor has left)

Dunbar (on the phone): That chap you sent in from UNIT - is he quite sane?
- Doctor Who, The Seeds of Doom: Part One (the Fourth Doctor, by the way)

Ooh I got another Transmetropolitan one.


"There is no talking back here.

There is no unspoken agreement to leave you with a scrap of dignity.

There is, in fact no guarantee that you'll be able to walk out of here.

LISTEN TO THE CHAIR LEG OF TRUTH! IT DOES NOT LIE! WHAT DOES IT SAY?"

-Spider Jerusalem


"How Do you know that I cant kill you by staring hard?"

-Spider Jerusalem


Taxi Driver: Where to?

Mitch Royce: Now there's a question.

First I want to go to a bar and drink it. And then Im going to have a fight with five men and win. And then I am going to make use of a truly staggering number of prostitutes, Some of whom I may have once ben married to. Following which, I would buy drugs. I will in fact show them a large pillowcase, and tell them to fill it with drugs...

...And Im putting it all on the god damned expense account.

'Well, mother mine,' he said at last, 'here I am, you see.  I said I would be in time for breakfast, and I have kept my word.'
  His voice had a low, throaty, animal quality, a sneering warmth that wound a velvet ribbon of sexuality over the outward coarseness of the man.
  Judith's breath came in long shudders.  She thrust her arms deeper into the shawl.  The porridge gave an ominous, leering heave; it might almost have been endowed with life, so uncannily did its movements keep pace with the human passions that throbbed above it.
  'Cur,' said Judith, levelly, at last.   'Coward!  Liar!  Libertine!  Who were you with last night?  Moll at the mill or Violet at the vicarage?  Or Ivy, perhaps, at the ironmongery?  Seth - my son...'  Her deep, dry voice quivered, but she whipped it back, and her next words flew out at him like a lash.
  'Do you want to break my heart?'
  'Yes,' said Seth, with an elemental simplicity.
  The porridge boiled over.

--Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons

"that's it. mankind's greatest contribution to the absurd. the thermonuclear bomb" John Crichton.

Quote from: King Of Hearts on September 01, 2007, 03:16:17 AM
"There is no talking back here.

There is no unspoken agreement to leave you with a scrap of dignity.

There is, in fact no guarantee that you'll be able to walk out of here.

LISTEN TO THE CHAIR LEG OF TRUTH! IT DOES NOT LIE! WHAT DOES IT SAY?"

-Spider Jerusalem

"It says Shut up, Fred! Can you hear it?"
"You've gone mad--"
"Can you hear it!?"
"YES!"
~ Spider Jerusalem and Fred Christ

"I have a sickness in the brain. I'm allowed to make no sense to you puny mortals, with your fully operational head-meat."
~ Spider Jerusalem

"And Santa Claus is dead! I killed him!" *grabs crotch* "I killed him with THIS! And I left his stinking corpse in an underground cavern where it is raped by hundreds of toxic-effluent-crazed gila monsters every second of every day!"
~ Spider Jerusalem, when interviewed over the Christmas period.

Aaand that's enough Transmetropolitan from me. I leave with a literary quote, one from a somewhat classic book in its genre, a quote that not many people I know would get because they're not bookish nerds like me. This forum will probably prove me wrong. *waves hand and vanishes*

The phone nearest him rang.  Automatically, he picked it up.
  "Yeah?"
Faint harmonics, tiny inaudible voices rattling across some orbital link, and then a sound like wind.
  "Hello, Case."
A fifty-lirasi coin fell from his hand, bounced, and rolled out of sight across Hilton carpeting.
  "Wintermute, Case. It's time we talk."
It was a chip voice.
  "Don't you want to talk, Case?"
He hung up. On his way back to the lobby, his cigarettes forgotten, he had to walk the length of the ranked phones. Each rang in turn, but only once, as he passed.

it'd have to be cyberpunk of some sort, and it's -very- familiar, but damned if I can put my finger on it. Something from Gibson, perhaps?

(and I -still- want to get hold of Transmetropolitan. *adds to wishlist*)

I am a Jedi Master.

I was participating in a deletion discussion, when some guy said this:

04:04 (http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/University_of_Florida_Taser_incident&diff=prev&oldid=159320459): Just because someone comes along and points to something red and says "green" doesn't make it so. You can argue that my argument is foolish, but that won't make it so. I make light of these types of things because your goofy mind tricks don't work, except on the weak minded. I'm also skilled at putting adversaries on the defensive

My Jedi Mind Tricks must have worked on him, because here's what he said next:

04:53 (http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/University_of_Florida_Taser_incident&diff=next&oldid=159326174):Fair enough. I'm not sure I agree with this assessment, but that's better.

(One is dressed as the other for Halloween)
Charlotte: So what are you going to do today?
Vendetta: What?!
Charlotte: I want to do everything just like you!
Vendetta: Hm... in that case, I was going to play in traffic, and drink bleach!
-Making Fiends

"Hey, what's in the tuna sandwich?"
".....Tuna....?"
- Terry and a waitress, a few years ago

"Fat guy in a little coat, Richard, fat guy in a little coat!"

*343 Guilty Spark and Master Chief teleport into the Control Center*
343 GS: ...Which means that any organism with sufficient mass and cognitive capabilities is a potential vector...*looks at Master Chief* Is...something wrong?
MASTER CHIEF: No. Nothing.
343 GS: Splendid. Shall we?
*both go to the Control Panel, 343 hums*
343 GS: Unfortunately, my usefulness in this particular endeavor has come to an end. Protocol does not allow units with my classification to perform a task as important as the reunification of Index with the Core...That, I must add, is reserved for you, Reclaimer.
*343 gives Index to Master Chief*
*Master Chief puts it in the Control Panel*
*Control rooms starts powering up, then shuts off*
343 GS: Hmm. Odd. That wasn't supposed to happen.
CORTANA: Oh really?
*Cortana blasts 343*
MASTER CHIEF: Cortana-!
CORTANA: *very pissed* I've spent the last twelve hours, cooped up in here, watching you toady about, helping that thing get set to slit our throats!
MASTER CHIEF: Hold on now. *points to 343* He's a friend.
CORTANA: *sarcastic* Oh! I didn't realize! He's your pal, is he? Your chum? *pissed again* Do you have ANY idea what that BASTARD almost made you do?
MASTER CHIEF: *slowly* Yes...Activate Halo's defenses and destroy the Flood, which is why we brought the Index to the Control Center.
CORTANA: *holds up Index* You mean this?
343 GS: A construct? In the Core?!? THAT IS ABSOLUTELY UNACCEPTABLE!
CORTANA: Sod off!
343 GS: Why, such insolence! I shall purge you at once!
CORTANA: *absorbs the Index* You sure that's a good idea?
343 GS: *turns away* How..how...how dare you! I'll-
CORTANA: Do what? I have the Index! You can just FLOAT AND SPUTTER!
MASTER CHIEF: *waves gun around* ENOUGH! *turns to Cortana* The Flood is spreading. If we activate Halo's defenses, we can wipe them out.
CORTANA: You have no idea how this ring works, do you? Why the Forerunners built it? Halo doesn't kill Flood! It kills their food! Humans, Covenant, whatever! We're all equally edible! The only way to stop the Flood is to starve them to death! And that's exactly what Halo is designed to do--wipe the galaxy clean of all sentient life! You don't believe me? Ask him!!! *points at 343*
MASTER CHIEF: *turns to 343* Is it true?
343 GS: ...More or less. Technically, this installation's pulse has a maximum effective radius of twenty-five thousand light-years. But once the others follow suit, this galaxy will be quite devoid of life! Or at least any life with sufficient biomass to sustain the Flood. *pauses* But you already knew that...I mean, how couldn't you?
CORTANA: *disdainfully* Left out that little detail, did he?
343 GS: We have follow outbreak containment procedure to the letter! You were with me each step of the way as we managed this crisis...
CORTANA: *worriedly* Chief, I'm picking up movement...
343 GS: Why would you hesitate to do what you've already done?
CORTANA: *urgently* We need to go, right now!
343 GS: *sentinels pop up, startling Master Chief* Last time you asked me, if it were my choice, would I do it? Having had considerable time to ponder your query-*Master Chief grabs Cortana and inserts her into his helmet*-my answer has not changed. there is no choice. We must activate the ring.
CORTANA: Get...us..out of here!!!
343 GS: If you are unwilling to help, I will simply find another. Still, I must have the Index. Give your constuct to me, or I will be forced to take it from you.
MASTER CHIEF: *slowly* That's not going to happen...
343 GS: So be it. *to his Sentinels* Save his head. Dispose of the rest. *343 teleports away*

-Halo: Combat Evolved, the cutscene in Two Betrayals


I know this is just supposed to be Favorite Quotes, but that whole cutscene is my personal favorite in all of Halo.

REPENT  THE END IS EXTREMELY FUCKING NIGH - Written in huge letters on a wall inside a church.
-28 Days Later

Darkness beyond twilight,
Crimson beyond blood that flows,
Buried in the sands of time,
In thy great name, I pledge myself to Darkness.
Let the fools who stand before us be destroyed by the power you and I possess!

*happiest face ever*

DRAGON SLAVE!

~ Lina Inverse, quoting her trademark spell.

"Needles to say that everything that the president has spoken the truth, no matter what he said"
-Donald Rumsfeld


I mean  :erk

"Well done, Android.  The Enrichment Center wishes to remind you that Android Hell is a real place, where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance."

Messenger : This is madness!
Leonidas : Madness? THIS! IS! SPARTA!!

(rest of movie: ) SPARTANS! BLABLABLA SPARTA YADDAYAP FREEDOM! *Xerxes backrub* *bloodsplatter slashy maim-athon* SPARTANS! *more killing* SPARTAAAAAAAA!!! *etc*



btw. how do I change font size?

Quote from: Vidar on October 23, 2007, 03:25:26 PM
btw. how do I change font size?

You don't.

You used to be able to, but some people abused the ability and spoiled it for everyone. HTH, HAND.

"Megatron! Megatron! Megatron!"
-Frenzy, causing the the cryogenic systems to the NBE 1 hangar to fail.

Judge Fear: GAZE INTO THE FACE OF DEATH!
Judge Dredd: GAZE INTO THE FIST OF DREDD!
*punches trough Judge Fear's head*

Whee, LEXX! Reliving season two~ (Y)

"I am dead, Stanley. I do not think in the way that you think I think."
"So...what do you think?"
"...I think that the living should be concerned with the living."
~ Kai after Stan asks him his opinion on their situation

"...I remember that I used to like fishing."
~ Kai's explanation on how he was able to use his arm mounted 'brace' to grab Xev by the arm and lift her off the ground and up to safety.

"I have killed mothers with their babies. I have killed great philosophers, proud young warriors, and revolutionares. I have killed the innocent and the good, the intelligent, the weak, and the beautiful. I have done this in the name of His Divine Shadow and his Predecessors, and I have never once shown any mercy."
~ Kai's spiel on being a Divine Assassin in its main form. He modifies it sometimes.

"My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

-The Princess Bride (film, in case the book didn't have it)

The book had it.