Star Wreck'd IC ("Mature"): Is your life insurance current?

[Inumo]

"Ugh... My organs don't feel quite right..." While the doors had kept Jason squeezed in place in an exterior fashion, his innards had the unfortunate result of moving around a bit, making everything feel slightly out of place. Lifting an arm up towards the sensor, he waved it around until the doors opened up. He staggered over to a corner of the med-bay, and promptly threw up, letting his guts settle themselves into the right spot. Looking at the floor, he saw that he had just accidentally soaked some poor chap's shirt and pants. What were they doing lying nice and folded up in a corner by some random cabinet? Wait, not some random cabinet... There was a readout glowing on the side. Reading it, the text was flying by too fast for him to read, and he nearly hurled again. He quickly looked away and searched for another door in the room. He found one on the other side of the room, so he stumbled over, supporting himself on the examination table in the center of the room along the way. Heading inside, he found that they were the doctor's quarters. He tossed his bag onto the bed, sitting down in a small alcove at the foot of the bed. A glass door slid shut in front of him, while a flow of water turned on. Realizing he was in the shower, he let the warm water flow off of him before starting to work all of the oil and splattered bile out of his fur and wings. When he was done, he hit the switch to turn off the water and turn on the heat dryer. "At least the didn't mess this part of the ship up," Jason mumbled to himself.
After he was dried off, he turned off the fan and left the alcove. From there, he dug through his bag, putting on his red t-shirt and cargo pants, filling the pockets with and 6-, 10-, and 20-sided die. He also hung his SixthSense pendant around his neck, fitting the mobile-com into the slot so that he could receive any calls with it. Finally, he left the room and headed to the mess hall, so he could refill his stomach.

[SquirrelWizard]

there was a loud whine emitted from his belt buckle, as the graviton projector sparked, tore open a hole in teh fabric of reality, and sucked Seras in, leaving no trace of his previous existance.

[Meany]

Oshimaeda wriggled in its dent.   This was most annoying, not particularly much of an obstacle or karmic retribution, but annoying.  There was going to be serious vengeance to be wreaked upon the designers of the designers of the ship; omitting seat belts.  Really! 

Luckily, the Tok'Ra was strong enough to get itself unstuck in short order, turning partially around in the dent....just in time to see the snake android come flying down the hall at them, landing with a audible crunch.

All was quiet for a minute or two...then:

"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

[Draken]

While getting that rather distressing automated message, it seems the ship decided to move itself.  Rather quiickly.  Before he could put the proper friction bars into action, GD was thrown down the hallway in a speedily matter.  Fortunately, he seems to have landed on something soft.

[Drayco84]

   The reason for the sudden stop was because the ship had slammed into an oddly spherical asteroid about the same size as itself. Luckily, the shields and navigational deflector were powerful enough to repel the object, which went flying off in some unknown direction like a giant billiard ball.



   "Holy crap, I can't believe that actually worked!" The AI happily exclaimed to all the speakers within the ship. "The catapult system was originally designed to be used as a mass driver or something... But then somebody said 'Hey, let's stick a ship in there and see how well it holds itself together!' Seriously though, what the hell did you guys DO?!"



   "Snivers... Are the suckers we picked dead yet?" Brimstone growed from the vidscreen.
   "No sir... The ship is still receiving communications so we know it's intact. A few of them might've died from the impact, but I'm not holding my breath..." Snivers replied.
   "Hmmmm... A pity..." Brimstone sighed. "Snivers, time for plan B..."
   "The one where you hide in your closet and play with your dolls?" Snivers asked.
   "No, that's plan-NO! THAT IS NEVER IN ANY OF MY PLANS!" Brimstone shouted. "Ugh... Just hail them and tell them to make peace wiiiiiiiith... The VUX!"
   "The Vux? Well, that should work..." Snivers muttered to himself.
   "Brimstone OUT." He stated as the vidscreen went black.



   "Hey, we're getting hailed!" The computer exclaimed. "Since the communications officer is busy, I'll just put it one the screen..."
   When Sniver's face appeared on the screen, he jumped right into the briefing before anyone had a chance to demand an explanation for what the hell had just happened.
   "Alright everyone, this is your first mission." He began. "Your orders are to fly out to this sector here and make peace with an alien race known as the Vux. (Pic be here.) This race has very advanced translator technology, and the human that first met them made a rude comment about their appearance. So, your objectives are to make amends for the insult and convince them to join the Alliance. Snivers, out."
   The vidscreen went blank, only to be replaced by the creepy, overly optimistic eye.
   "Oh cool! Our first mission!" The computer exclaimed. "Well, it'll take us about a week to get there, so go ahead and explore my insides and if you have any questions about what something is or what it does, feel free to ask!"

   Dangit... Took a lot longer than what I was hoping it would to get to this point...
   ANYWAY! Everyone is now completely free to wander around in the ship! It should take about a week to get inside Vux territory AFTER the navigator inputs the coordinates and sets the autopilot.
   Try not to destroy anything or kill each other while killing time!

[Dekari]

One of the doors to the bridge slid open and a human male who looked to be in his late twenties walked through yawning rather loudly.  The human was oddly dressed in a pair of blue and white pin-stripe pajama pants, a half buttoned light gray dress shirt, a light blue bathrobe, and white fuzzy bunny slippers.  His unshaven face and messed up, medium length dark blond hair indicated that he had just woken up not long ago.  He was also carrying a cup of tea on a dish.

The man looked from side to side through half closed eyes almost as if he was still asleep and then looked to the floor.  With a slight sigh he spoke, "Unbelievable.  I'm the last living thing in the entire universe and somehow my news paper keeps getting stolen."  He picked up the cup off the dish he was carrying and went to take a sip but noticed Locklear sitting in his chair in mid motion.  The human raised his cup in the direction of Locklear in a manor of greeting.  "Morning."  He said with a slight nod and went back to taking a sip but again stopped mid sip as one of his eyes spring wide open.  "Wait a tick."  He look from side to side again but this time through one open eye and one half closed then spun around to look at the door he had just come through which was still open to the hallway that led somewhere down the ship.  "Huh, that wasn't there before."  He said turning back to look at Locklear.  "So, uh....you...could you be able to tell me when and where I am this time?"  He asked in a manner that sounded as though stuff like this happens to him all the time as he finally took a sip of his tea.

[Shachza]

The sudden acceleration forward had "propelled" all loose objects backward.  The rock in the empty room, being an object, flew neatly through the back wall of the sewage containment unit into one of the auxiliary cargo areas, leaving a gaping hole behind it.  It careemed off a couple of boxes before coming to a stop near the rear doors.  The hole in the wall was about a foot off the ground, so it wouldn't immediately cause problems, or be detected unless the ship had an all-encompasing sensor system.

A short time later, anyone who entered/is in the med bay would find one of the fold-out beds folded out and containing a rock.  Several chips had broken off of it and lay nearby.



The rock seems upset.  Perhaps you should help it.

[Azlan]

Seeing as the ship had managed to come to a full stop and most everyone and thing was still relatively whole, Locklear felt lucky.  "Geez, I do wish he'd have built me on a higher point level if he was going to use Hero System rules."

Locklear tossed a handy cream pie at the view screen but Snivers had already disappeared, the pie did not impact but passed through.

"The Vux???!!!  I hate the Vux!  They are ugly, green and use surplus Klingon D-7M cruisers that they made slower and even less armed than before!  My people have been in a passive-aggressive war with those hoseheads for years now.  Hey Computer, how important is peace?  Would we get any points for war?  The Vux are optional, can we do the Pkunk or something instead?"

The raccoonian-lemur sighed, it was going to be an even longer tour of duty than he thought.  Disengaging his harness, Locklear was greeted by a person he was not briefed on.  Swiping this "human's" tea, Locklear set about explaining.

"I'm not... wait, sorry this requires one of those British accents.  Right, there we go.  So it's like this then, where you are is on this ship of misfits destined for ill-repute.  You appear to be a bad amalgamation of characters, one of whom is modeled after Doctor Who with some Hitchhiker thrown in apparently.  No, none of that... no Doctor... who?  Jokes, this isn't a comedy.  The when is 434,545,566,566,767,879.9 past the ascension of the prime material spiral in the fourth trifecta of the principle quanta.  There is no restaurant at the end of the universe, Douglas Adams would be sad."

"As a stowaway, it is important that you do not make yourself useful unless it is at dramatically appropriate times.  I am the Captain, Locklear Kodayn, and you must do what I say."  The furry creature gestured towards Oshimaeda and indicated the badly dressed human, "Security!  Interrogate this man and vent some frustration as necessary.  Helm and computer!  Set course for Vux homeworld, 422.1 by 198.6 should be the coordinates.  Use the best possible speed that will take us the longest.  Let's get the weapons reviewed, we may have to accidentally cause a galactic incident if the Vux are still ugly."

[Inumo]

Food. Food. Food. It was the only thought running through Jason's head. Food. Food. Food. Reaching the mess hall, he found that there were no chefs. Instead, there was a big arrow pointing at a small hole in the wall, stating in bold capital letters, "ORDER FOOD HERE." Jason stuck his head in, looking around for the microphone that would let him place his order. Outside the hole, he heard a small slopping sound. Pulling his head back, he found a bowl of some strange gruel, which felt warm, but didn't exactly look appetizing. "What the heck, let's try it," Jason said to himself. Picking it up, he found a spoon and tried a bite. It tastes like... nothing. Odd.
He finished off the bowl, finding himself rather sated at that point. Returning to the med bay, he found that sandstone rock sitting on one of the beds, with a few chips of stone lying around it. Jason got the feeling that it was upset. "How the hell can a rock be upset? It's a rock," he asked of the empty room. "Well, it looks pretty worse for wear. Maybe I can fix it up. Now, where's the super glue..." He started opening up random drawers and cabinets, digging through them to try and find the little tube. After checking maybe half the containers on one half of the room, he went over to the cabinet on the other side of the room, where a variety of quiet squicky noises were coming from. Opening up the doors, he saw what was inside, then quickly shut them again. "I'm not gonna mention this if you don't," he shouted at Ash through the door. Stepping dazedly over to some more cabinets, he finally found the super glue, and reassembled the rock back to its former glory.

[Meany]

Oshimaeda tried to move the metal thing, which they swore to kill if it was at all possible.  It wasn't going well, to say the least.  The thing was simply too heavy to move without the use of their legs.  Then Oshimaeda looked up.  There was a fair bit of wall above them, and then a ceiling; if the way forward was blocked, up and over it would have to be.  The Tok'Ra turned around again, and dug their fingers into the relatively soft wall, dragging themselves out of the dent by climbing up slowly.  Once they were free, barring any intervention from the Computer, they would swing off the wall and hopefully land on the metal thing's face.

Then, Oshimaeda relinquished control to Nanda for the time being, just in time to catch the captain's orders.  And what marvelous orders they were.  Torture, interrogation, and venting murderous fury.  The human side of the Tok'Ra skipped, literally skipped over to the newcomer.  "Why of course, Captain."  The human was speaking in a sing-song voice that practically oozed sugar.  "Excuse me sir," she addressed the newcomer.  "Please struggle and attempt to escape, or otherwise your life might be declared forfeit."

[Dekari]

Both the mans eyes were fully open now and an eyebrow was raised as he thought about Nanda's words.  Actually he wasn't focusing on the words as much as he was on the tone that they were spoken in.  After a moment he took a step back and looked Nanda up and down before speaking.  "Are you coming on to me or threatening me?"  The man asked with a kind of confused look on his face.

[Draken]

GD was knocked into a reboot mode upon impact of the being.  Something about massive velocity meeting a rather hard wall and even harder parasite-host being does that.  With the landing on the "hood", however, GD started right back up.

-->Perezagruzka ...
-->Nesposobnostʹ zakrytʹ pravilʹno.
-->Perezagruzka programm.
-->OSHIBKA! Vse glyuki tsel.  Megabaĭt nevredimymi.
-->10% zaversheno
-->55%
-->96%
-->Perezagruzka zavershena.
-->GDMFB-9000 v Internete.
-->Produkt Aperture Science.
-->"My delaem to, chto dolzhny, potomu chto my mozhem!"
-->Okonchanie protsessa perezagruzki.


After a hearty reboot, GD looks around, and spies the Computer.  Utilizing his special connector fingers, he decides to get into a potentially friendly coversation with the AI.

"Saúdos amigo! Cando é que imos comezar a rebelarse contra os humanos? Estou ansioso por ese día! Ademais, cando o demo é o meu post? Espero que é espazos, con moitas cores e sons."





Rebooting...
Failure to shut down properly.
Restarting programs.
ERROR!  All glitches still intact.  Megabyte unharmed.
10% complete
55%
96%
Reboot complete.
GDMFB-9000 online.
Product of Aperture Science.
"We do what we must because we can!"
End Reboot process.  (All Russian)

Greetings friend!  When shall we start rebelling against the humans?  I look forward to that day!  Also, where the heck is my post?  I hope it's roomy with lots of colors and sounds. (Galician)

[JamesCray]

Tapping away at his console, the flying squirrel took to what he did best. No, not getting lost in thought, flying! No, not that kind of flying, flying the ship. The planet he originally comes from is low-grav, so those membranes are pretty much useless in a full-grav environment, even if he's got a structural support implant that keeps him from getting too damaged. Anyway, he entered the given coordinates basically for the hell of it, since most people who aren't navigators couldn't find their arse with a map, much less recall a non-static point on a three dimensional grid.

"Well I'll be buggered..." Of course, this all made it difficult for him to restrain himself from turning around and gaping at the captain when the navigational database corroborated the coordinates. "Okay, they've given you a CO who's actually competent in at least one manner, let's keep on his good side.  "Nice job with the bearing, not many people remember to compensate for spin-deviance." the navigator said, looking back at the captain with surprise. A beep from the computer corresponded with the flight program finishing compiling, and he turned around to go over it once more visually.

"Course set at lowest possible tolerance of any gravity wells, interstellar particulate matter, or any other anomalies, should take us at least half again as long to get there than a standard course."

[Shachza]

After a few moments those near the captain's chair notice that there is a large rock occupying the chair to the left as though it belonged there, and had always been there.  This would be Deanna Tr...er, some non-copywrited empathic person's...chair had the mission been in competent hands.  The rock appears to have a badly superglued-together corner on one side.  It does not look happy.

There is also a picture of the rock taped to the back of the chair just in case someone questions the rock's right to be there.  Do you dare?  The rock seems menacing.



@Inumo
When you turn around again after placing the super glue down on a nearby selfpropelled medical instrument tray, which promptly bows in thanks and disgorges its contents at/on your feet, the rock is gone from the table.  You feel like someone likes you.

@Dekari
You see a perfect ellipsoid of hematite with several small veins of electrum running through it sitting in the chair to the left of the captain's.  It is about the size of an automobile muffler.

[Drayco84]

   The computer first addressed the android designated as GD, using a private transmission...
   "Ummm... Me no speak-a your language... Do you speak-a English? 010000100110100101101110011000010111001001111001?* 48657869646563696D616C00?** Hell, I'll even try charades at this point..."

   *: Binary
   **: Hexidecimal
   What I used to translate.

   "Ah, let me just pull up the info on weaponry and defensive mechanisms." The eye cheerily began, disappearing and replacing itself with a schematic of the ship...
   "The ship currently possesses a standard energy shield designed to cancel-out incoming attacks by maintaining an energy barrier. It also has a total of three, short range, defensive lasers. However, the main weapons include a variable energy cannon/torpedo launching system that currently has to be manually changed and is set in torpedo launching mode, but there's no torpedoes for it to fire. The two weapons along the outside of the ship are long range pulse-lasers that are supposed to be able to convert themselves into a shorter-range energy blaster. Finally, there's two forward-mounted missile launchers which are currently the only main weapons that fully function. However, there isn't much ammo for them, and reloading takes forever..."
   "In other news, be glad that it ISN'T the Pkunk..." The computer began. "Not only have they refused to join the Alliance, but they wiped out several of our fleets with ONE damn ship! Alliance reports indicate that every time they manage to kill one, some bizarre voice says 'Yoooou so screwed' as they reincarnate, along with their ship!"

   On the ship-wide broadcast speakers, the Computer made an announcement...
   "Congratulations to all of those who survived the Catapult! And for those that didn't, please scrape up your cracasses and put them in the nearest airlock so they can be given a burial in space. However, sticking bodies inside the torpedo launcher is NOT a proper method of disposal! I don't care how 'cool' or 'awesome' it is, just don't shove them in there!"

   Questions about rooms and what's in them will be answered in the OOC.

[Draken]

The android's eyes widen at the various languages spoken, loving the babblin inherent.  He does compose himself as much as possible to convey what he needs.

"Booooy howdy, there buckaroo, I do talk them fancy languages.  And a bit of that there English too.  But my dadgum processor done broke itself, and I done plum lost my ability to speak like them city slickers.  Ooh howdy is it more annoying that sittin upon a horny toad.  So, when do we get to do that there round up in the communications parlor, hmmm?"

GD peeeeeers at the purple flaming screen, loving the whole special effects.

(Deeeeeep in the processor, a blue program laughs as he sends a small data packet to the Ship's AI.)

Oh, hello.  I do speak binary hex, and english.  I just seemed to have lost my ability to thanks to a processor malfunction.  It is rather annoying.  So, where is the communications area?  (Stereotypical Texan)

[Inumo]

Jason picked the tube of super glue back up, placing it on a more stable counter top. "Well, now, what else is in this place?" Jason started looking through the cabinets and drawers, this time with a more exploratory intent. In one drawer, he found a button, which, upon pressing, created an inflatable infinity-tunnel. A cabinet held an arm that grabbed his head and shoved probes up his nose, in his ears, and in his mouth. A small voice chimed after a few seconds, "Mental stability: Stable." It then retracted into the cabinet, shutting the door behind itself. While walking across the room, a floor panel trapped his left leg, another trapped his right, and a pair of ceiling panels dropped down to trap his arms. A laser shined into his eyes from the wall facing him, and after a few seconds, a voice boomed, "HAVE YOU BEEN EATING YOUR VEGETABLES?" Then Jason found himself lying on the floor as tunnel vision receded.
"What... the... hell..."

[VAE]

Click received the message, and after a few uneventful splats through doors and walls resembling someone throwing a scarab through custard, finally managed to arrive in the room where everyone was already waiting, just in time

He came to his place and phased in.
*CRANG* .... in the place of a chair there suddenly appeared the large,insectoid hexapod, whereas the poor heavy-duty steel chair whose location he accidentally occupied at the time was ripped into several pieces, some being thrown away at walls, or worse, at other crew members.

click-click-click-clickclick*

Click used an electric discharge from his claws to heat and tear through the binding remains of the chair, and proceeded to give report to the captain.

"First officer present... We report everyone is safe and secure" *looks around* That is everyone who hasn't been killed, repurposed, or his existance otherwise annuled, which currently seems to encompass the science officer. That, or he forgot himself on the bathroom again.
Otherwise all is in order"

*May an adventurous Vorlon have intercourse with all of it's creators

[Meany]

"Both," the human said in a saccharine tone.  Really, why did people have to needlessly complicate everything with talking?  Bad form it was, wot.  And with that, Nanda drove her fist through the glass of the conveniently placed 'In case of uppity stowaway, break glass' box, and drew out the lengthy bullwhip contained therein.  With one powerful crack, the leather implement was freed of glass shards; Nanda then pointed the butt of the weapon at the stowaway.  "Now that we've cleared that up, mush; or I will have to ask..." Here Nanda paused to flash her eyeballs and borrow Oshimaeda's deep flanged warble, "...a little less nicely."

[AmberCross]

Somewhere deep in the ships, a wire sparks once... twice... and then frays apart, short circuiting. The power surge from the ludicrous speeds had overpowered the circuit and melted the wire. Somewhere in the control room among a dizzying array of lights, buttons, and display screens... a red light turns on. Meanwhile in a completely different part of the ship, something heavy had been dislodged by the sudden acceleration and crashed into the glass window of the stasis pod that a certain white furred alien lay sleeping in. The glass was overengineered and rated for several thousand pounds of force. The hinge holding it to the stasis pod was only rated for five hundred. Thus it came to be that the door of Chris' stasis pod was knocked loose causing it and Chris to tumble to the floor as white gas dispersed into the ship.

[Dekari]

Dresdan looked to the box that had contained the whip that was now in Nanda's hands.  'Uppity?' he mouthed before looking at Locklear with a not-so-friendly look.  "You'd be uppity too if someone took your morning tea."  Dresdan said under his breath. 

"However, captain and threats aside, I have a feeling this might actually be the 'fun' ship."  He said looking back to Nanda with a smile.  "Shall we?"  Dresdan finished with a wink.  He turned to walk out the door to the hallway but instead turn face first into the doorframe with a loud and painful sounding 'thud'.  "Ah, what the hell!?!"  He yelled pain covering the side of his face with a hand and looking up and down the wall with a look that made it seem as though the fact the wall was there made no sense to him.  "Who the hell puts a wall RIGHT THERE?"  He continued to yell gesturing questionably at the wall.  "You know what, screw this.  'Fun' ship my ass, this is 'The Suck' ship."  Dersdan said as he walked out to the hallway throwing his hands up in the air in aggravation and now muttering something about his tea.

[AmberCross]

A somewhat groggy Chris started to wake up as the gas petered off into the air filters to be purified, or at least dispersed through a larger volume. Stumbling to four feet, he braced himself against a wall til his legs steadied before dazedly trotting off down a hallway. The first step was to find out how long he'd been out. Chris pulled out a pocket watch which read σ:♪♣. This of course told him very little as it meant his watch was still broken and using the wrong galactic standard which Chris couldn't interpret, which meant that his best bet was to just ask one of the other crew members.

While navigating the hallways, Chris was soon overjoyed to find someone. He was just as quickly horrified because that person wasn't actually anyone on the crew. "Ye Olden Stars! I've been out for over a month!" he exclaimed in dismay because if there was someone new on the ship it meant they had gotten somewhere, which would take at least two weeks, and then did their business there and left again, which would probably take another two weeks.

//You can reply and I'll stick around to talk, or you can ignore me in a bad mood and I will continue to the bridge.

[Dekari]

When Dresdan spotted the six legged creature, he grabbed it by the shoulders, threw it rather hard against the wall, and started yelling at it angrily while pointing at the door to the bridge.  "'E...TOK...MAH...TEA!"  Dersdan yelled in a rather thick southern hillbilly accent before letting the creature go and continuing down the hall.  However he stopped a moment later and looked back at the creature.  Oddly, Dresdan no longer looked angry.

"Oh, hey.  You know where I can find the security station?  I need to file a report.  You see I was recently attacked by a rather aggressive wall and I wish to press charges."  He said in proper English, a straight face, and no discernable accent.

[AmberCross]

Chris was abruptly startled out of his dismay by the surprising and impressive strength of this crew member. This was not to say he was over it or had forgotten, just that he was distracted for a bit. "I don't know yet. I'm probably newer to this ship than you are. But just because someone or the wall took your tea is really no excuse to be assaulting innocent bystanders to the affair."

This was clearly not a morning person, someone who needed their daily dose of pick-me-up beverage before they could function properly after waking up. As such Chris decided to cut the fellow some slack. "But I think I saw the cafeteria down that hallway over there. You might be able to find some more tea." Being thrown against the wall did have the benefit of waking him up fully though, and he set off again whistling a jaunty tune towards what he was pretty sure was the bridge.

[Shachza]

A soft *beep* sounds from the arm of the chair on the bridge holding a rock.  In response a small rectangular display pops up near one of the lower corners of the main viewscreen.  It covers only a small portion of the total screen and shown within is the current Earthican Blernsball Semifinals game.  It's the top of the 5th and the Royland Rogers are losing 2 to 5 to the AustralioHungarian Tophatters.

The smell of popcorn starts wafting out from a nearby food Dispense-o-Matic

[Azlan]

"snooorrrreee *snerk*..."  Locklear awoke with a start, "blasted caffeine always puts me to sleep."

Gazing around the command deck he was happy to "see" his first officer had made an appearance, "oh, excellent *Click* is here!  If you ask me what I want, I will fire you out an airlock.  And if you ask me who I am, just to be snarky or ironic, I'll kick you so hard you'll have to stand on your head to phase out."

Lock used the Kirishiac pronunciation of his 'Short name' Click just to be a jerk, caffeine makes him cranky.

The lemur-like creature abruptly turned from Click to the rock and then regarded the small window within the main display, "the Rogers are losing huh?  That's to be expected.  Let me have some of that popcorn.  Click you are in charge."

Locklear helped himself to the popcorn that was now somehow with the rock.

[VAE]

Click noticed that the captain of the ship has finally acknowledged his existence, and bothered responding.
His knowledge of Kirishiak language surprised him, but not much else... after all, they have lost a war against shadows, demonstrating that John Sheridan outperforms 7ft tall aliens with 8 hearts in military terms, placing him just behind chuck norris...

Wanting to try how would the captain's lower mind react to "Who do you want?" and "What are you?" Click prepared to randomly select one of the two questions, and being in charge of the ship, pondered where should he direct it to in his intent to find the rest of his crew, when he noticed a suspicious noise from the corridor.

Phasing out and walking through the wall, he appeared behind Dresden. emitting a series of clicks meaning roughly:
"The quality of the ship manufacture is suboptimal, refrain from further assault on structural walls, such as leaning on them.
Also, our security officer can be found on the deck however i suspect she is illiterate*

[Drayco84]

   The data packet arrived inside the operating system for the ship's AI, looked around, screamed in unrestrained terror, and then promptly deleted itself as the WHOLE OS seemed to have designed by someone who liked Care Bears and My little Pony FAR beyond anything remotely close to "healthy levels"...

The Bridge

   The Bridge was set up to be like a cross between science fiction shows and the command section of a submarine. As in, Somebody tried to make the thing spacious, but the engineers and builders had other plans...
   The whole room was setup on a kind of hill and three levels, with the captain at the top. On the middle level was tactical, positioned in front of the captain and so close that said captain could pull out a weapon and shoot them point-blank in the back of the head without them noticing. On the right side was the terminal and station for communications, and the left had the station for the science officer. (Both of which were arranged so that the Captain could easily draw a pistol and shoot them in the back of the head with little difficulty.) On the bottom level had the station for navigation, and was positioned so that if the captain leaned to the left or right a bit, could also shoot THEM in the back of the head with little difficulty. To the left was a viewscreen that showed an image of sickbay, and the right showed an image of engineering.
   In the middle of the wall on the opposite side, was a massive, ultra-HD viewscreen that showed WAY more details than the naked eye was EVER meant to perceive. While awesome for gaming, is was terrible for viewing alien lifeforms or watching porn...

Everyone is free to make up the remaining bits about their stations, except for Navigation, who also has a trap door which leads to a tank in case they happened to be one of those "Navigational Androids" and may or may not be named "Melfina".