(Music) Myr's Lyrics and Prose

[Myr]

Ah, yes. Music. I write music lyrics occasionally, and I feel up to sharing some. Sometimes they have a morbid feel, or more of a jaunty type of rhythm to the wording. Critique is welcomed, very much so.

Today's song is very, very old; the first I've ever done. It has a jaunty feel, and was done on request in an incredibly old scene I'd done. The feel for it was more or less a song for a less-than-sober fox done -I think- in a somewhat ribald, carefree fashion. I hope yeh enjoy. For sake of convenience, call this one 'The Old Fox'.



"Oh, I'm a mangy old fox that I am;
And a mangy old fox I'll be.
I'll lift my old head on up high
For all the world to see.

'My one old eye stares hard on by;
My crooked old tail held high;
My flanks a'ways heave,
Near fit to grieve, for now is the day I die.

'I'll march my old legs onward;
Both stiff and strong.
I'll march until the sun sets last
and light fades on a'non.

'I've lived my life with joy, old boy,
And enjoyed it all in full.
I've had my girl, I've had my young,
And now I must move on.

'The Lady sets me on the path;
Ever straight and true,
For all must bow before her
When dawn fades into gloom.

'Thus I'm the mangy old fox that I am, my boy,
And that mangy old fox I'll stay;
I've had my days, upon the quays,
But now my rest can't be d'layed."


As before, any and all critique is fine by me. I'll update this every so often when I have the opportunity.

For the sake of ease, I'll put up links as-and if- this starts growing in size.



Lord Soth's Song- one of the different songs and writings that inspired me.

[Succubus_1982]

Nice! It has the sort of tune that you'd expect to have someone whistle as they were walking along a rustic country road

One point..... It doesn't seem to have any rhythm to it and theres a different amount of syllables in almost every line. As far as I know from songs and poems you're generally supposed to have a set pattern for each verse right?

It's more prose therefore than a song. Still you have a lot of potential and talent, so keep at it 

[WhiteFox]

The meter and rhyme do seem a little off.

[Myr]

Indeed they do, Whitefox. The character that was done for was, as I said,was less than sober and it had to sound a bit out of tune. But yeah, it should be called prose. Heheh, Just never bothered to classify it as such when I wrote it up so long ago.

And yep, Succubus_1982. Heheh, that's exactly the tune I went for.

Anyway, as a special treat while I dig into my writings -and steadily work on more- I'll show yeh one of the bits of prose (It could be called a song, however, depending on one's take.) that inspired me. This is from a book that is even older than I- 'DragonLance Legends', which was done by multiple people who can claim right as its author.

The tone for this one, I have always believed, is morbid, hollow; while the voice is soft, almost like it is being whispered in one's ear. Introducing the song of the Death Knight, Lord Soth:



Set aside the buried light
Of candle, torch, and rotting wood,
And listen to the turn of night
Caught in your rising blood.

How quiet is the midnight, love,
How warm the winds where ravens fly,
Where all the changing moonlight, love,
Pales in your fading eye.

How loud your heart is calling, love,
How close the darkness at your breast,
How hectic are the rivers, love,
Drawn through your dying wrist.

And love, what heat your frail skin hides,
As pure as salt, as sweet as death,
And in the dark the red moon rides
The foxfire of your breath.

Enjoy.

[Succubus_1982]

Oooh Dark is right. I'm guessing kinda vampiric.... I like it but again only two verses have the same rhythm. I counted and they go like this...

6
8
8
6

8
8
8
6

8
9
7
6

8
8
8
6

I like that they all end with a 6 syllable line but... you should have made the 3rd verse have the same rhythm as the first. or else had either the 8,8,8,6 or 6,8,8,6 rhythm throughout.

[Myr]

Er, I have to note yet again that last one is not mine-it was one of the few that encouraged me to write that prose 'The Old Fox' (I refuse to take credit for something that isn't mine, though I will lend credit to where I got it!). Or try, anyway. Guess I picked up the style from the aforementioned book, come to think of it.

Still, I guess it sounds vampiric... I will note, the character Soth from said novel isn't a vampire, but a knight cursed to live for eternity.

Now, back to digging....And improving my style. Heh.

[Myr]

Yergh, two weeks. Anyway. This one doesn't have a name yet (And yes, it's my own, unlike the one that inspired me for music, that 'lovesong' of the dead.), but anyway, it's a piece I've had time to consider-a rather solemn family oath, as I believe it should be, from yet another old character I'd enjoyed in years past.

My fur is the joining of Fire and Night,
My pelt a barrier to the Foe,
Mine eyes are the colors of Life, and
Mine ears the seekers of Strife.
Thine jaws bring swift Penance on one,
Thine fangs give fervor to one's heart,
And thine breath burns free the chaos of thine soul.

Thy nose is keenest when scenting for Guilt,
Thy mind the stricture of Reason and Truth.
One's back is to lay bare one's burdens, and
One's chest for fending one's Life.
Thine flesh is the holder of thine might, and
Thine might is a justice of the Plains.

Mine flanks heave life in mine Form, and
Mine blood is that of the Earth's.
My limbs bring swift Mercy to one,
My feet lithe balance in Combat.

My claws–they are the Judgment of Fate
Guided by Truth and Reason.
Thy tail is the semblance of uncaring Sky,
Or the color of blanketing Snow.

Think of a slightly deep, somber voice, speaking quietly for it; as if stating fact or merely reaffirming their purpose in life.