The Computer Problems thread!

[Rowne]

I'll just add a bit to this.  I'd never rely on just one anti-malware program personally.  For spyware and the likes, what's suggested is good, I'd also run AdAware aswell.

I strongly suggest using the utilities found at this site to help with the ongoing fight against unknown malware.

I would also strongly suggest a good software firewall, Kerio Personal Firewall is always a good choice.

Finally, as for virus scanners, I read the Virus Bulletin magazine which basically, every month, fills a number of PCs up with viruses and then throws scanners at those PCs to see which scanners fall over and which scanners prevail.  Here you can find their latest summary (just use bugmenot for the username and bugmenot for the password to login if you don't feel like creating an account), the virus scanners that seem to do the best according to that are Nod32 and Kaspersky Antivirus.  I was a big fan of KAV even before I knew of VirusBtn but Nod32 just pips KAV when it comes to an overall success/fail ratio.  Click the antivirus' name for the success/fail ratio history.

Once you have all of that, I'd also say that you should get a hardware firewall too and once you have that, check this services list to see whether you have any services running in XP which are unknown by that list and if you do, Google them to see if they're bad.  If you only have those lists, set them to the defaults defined by that list.  If any of them look non-essential, shut them down.

Then and only then will you be just as about as secure as Windows can be, which isn't all that much but it's better than the 'piss in the wind' security that Windows runs with by default.

[Damaris]

I'm sorry, I do have the Window's Defender.  I just can never remember it's name.

We do use a router, so that helps some with the firewall, and I very rarely, if ever, download anything myself. 

Thank you, guys, I'll give all that a try.

[Nikki]

ok, we found the virus..and the name escaped me...it started with a ..K i think...

Dad thinks it's a Trojan virus...

[Gornemant]

a trojan is not a virus, a spy ware is not a virus, a virus is none of those two etc...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malware

note: anti viruses don't (mostly) check for spywares and trojan horses/worms, anti-spyware doesn't check for viruses or worms/trojan horses (also mostly), if someone told you that AdAware checks for anything else than spyware, sorry, no.

And if you're running on windows: keep it up to date! I can't repeat that enought, and yet people still complain about random malwares that use a 1 year old bug that's been fixed for the past 9 months in a security update....
http://windowsupdate.microsoft.com

[Gabi]

A trojan can be a virus, if it replicates itself. That's what makes a program a virus.

[Nex]

A trojan is considered a virus most of the times because it evades the anti-virus protection while causing malicious intent to the computer.

My recommendation is to run the virus protection once normally, then run it again in safe mode. This way, it cannot escape using any internet programs, and it can't get out of your computer.

Nortin Systemworks is notorious for deleting many spyware, trojans, and virus's using this method, but you have to put the computer in safe mode yourself, otherwise it won't work. I had the same problem on my computer, and this is what I used to rid myself of it.

What virus protection are you running? I haven't used anything else besides Nortin Systemworks, because it rids everything for me: internet clutter, temporary files, viruses, and when you update it keeps you nice and clean.

[Rowne]

I still stand by my advice.  <.<  Simply a virus scanner won't cut it these days, it's just not enough protection.  Then again, most people might not be as absurdly paranoid as I am.

The FBI is out to get me, that overweight old lady over there spraying her lawn is really a G-Man in an overweight old lady suit!

Still, I'm guilty of not having setup my new hardware router/firewall yet.  I need to do that, I'm feeling all naked without it.

Anyway, these days I find that malware can be very multipurpose.  That something can have aspects of being both a trojan and a virus that makes it neither explicitly a trojan or a virus in a mutually exclusive way.  However, there is an umbrella term that refers to "All software that's designed to do bad things."  That term is 'malware' and that's the one I use these days, whether I'm speaking about spyware, trojans, viruses, worms, keypress recorders or whatever else.

---- Edit

Xze, get me the name of the virus if you can and I'll do my best to find some removal instructions for you.  If you can't get the name though, I recommend installing one of the industry leaders in virus-handling, everyone will have their suggestions on that count.

There's one thing I must say though, never, ever rely on free virus scanners such as Grisoft's AVG, they're about as ineffective as not having a scanner in the first place.

Still, if you can get me the name of it, I can do my best to save you from having to buy anything.

[KarlOmega1]

I wish they invent something someday...something mentioned in a certain CAPCOM game series (the series being MegaMan Battle Network, aka MMBN)...that way if a virus or other malicious program threatens our computers, we can fight back with Navis...

[Nikki]

i wish they would invent Persocoms -_-;

[KarlOmega1]

I think the term is PET (Personal Electronic Terminal, or Personal Terminal)...

[Rowne]

The problem with that though is that reality gets in the way.  Either it would be that viruses still wouldn't be sentient and that the Navis would get bored with rewriting arbitrarily dull an uninteresting malignant code that they find in order to preserve the sanctity of the computer or the virus would be sentient, in which case ...

Could you imagine what a truly sapient virus would do to your machine?  It would taunt and tease you in the worst ways possible and if it died, it'd likely set things up so it'd take your entire hard drive with it -- and implant some time release virus on your backups so they'd go poof too.

Artificial Intelligence viruses make me shiver with fear.  I hope that if AI ever does happen to come about, it's more like Johnny 5 than that.

[Aridas]

Anyone have any idea what causes a computer to make random beeps similar to (but not always the same as) this one through the pc speaker during operation?

http://www.angelfire.com/weird2/aridas/beepy.wav

[Sid]

Speaking blindly, without knowledge of your PC (Mainboard and graphics card in particular) and without being an active PC Expert, this might be one of your components complaining. An example would be the graphics card getting too hot while you game (friend of mine once had that problem).

I'm no specialist there, but I think people could help you better when you post mainboard model and graphics card type here. Also try to narrow down the time when this happens? Does the compy run for a certain while first? Are you running games when it happens? Stuff like that.

[Aridas]

No, it's nothing to do with a graphics card or anything. It happens when it's going through POST, and with a couple minutes in between each. It doesn't seem to have any pattern with the beeps, but they do sound like those, just long or short, one or two, a combination of both, nothing meaningful.

Also, it was a brand name. an eMachines emonster 600. That should at least help you find the model of its guts.

[Rowne]

I can't access the beepy.wav file, otherwise I'd have a listen.  I can't find specifically what motherboard the eMonster uses but for some POST codes, the code is pretty much the same across a variety of BIOS types.  It's only in certain instances do they vary and I should still be able to pin it.

From what you've described though, I'd say it's either a video-adaptor error that occurs at bootup or a keyboard error.  Is your keyboard USB?  Does your computer have troubles recognizing the keyboard at boot?  Have you tried unplugging your keyboard and plugging in a new, older keyboard-port style keyboard to see whether it stops beeping?

If it's the keyboard and the keyboard works in Windows, I'd say it's nothing to worry about.  It's just a weird keyboard in that case.

[Aridas]

Well, it's not a POST beep It's a grinding kind of beep, and it's never consistent. You can't really predict "how" it will beep next. It also just happens at anytime. even when the POST is long gone and I'm messing around in Windows. I can't tell you much about the motherboard, since it's not really marked.

EDIT: Took a bit of a thinking session and uncluttered my messy thoughts. Separated two different things and came up with "Napoli 2"... which is nothing alike -.-;;; Anyway, did some extra thinking and searching under cables and things and found a label with NAPO-2A. i'll leave all the other numbers here just in case.

Mat. no: 110871 1991001
S/N: (4) 304038-5038986
Rev. E

If there are any specifics you need, i'll give em up.

[Rowne]

Waitaminute, with the beep you've described, is it like ...

Beep [0.5 seconds] beep [0.5 seconds] beep [0.5 seconds] beep [0.5 seconds] beep [... long pause ...] beep [0.5 seconds]?  Is it like that?  Where the spaces between the beeps are uniform but when the beeps happen and how many actually occur isn't?  And it does this when the machine is actively running after Windows has booted?

I'm just trying to pin down what kind of beeping it is.

If it's the kind I've described then I know exactly what's wrong.

[Aridas]

no no no, nothing like that... but there's usually only one or two beeps, sometimes one of the beeps can be really short, sometimes both are long. (always less than a second in length each though) and it sounds kinda like... I dunno, grinding. I'd send you the example but you don't seem to have any contact.

[Rowne]

Oh, sorry about that.  I'm not antisocial or anything, I just fear the spambots.

wuffxiii ATSIGN gmail PERIOD com

Send it there.

I need to hear this though because logic tells me it's likely to be the CPU overheating but the beeps sound wrong for that.  Once I've heard them, I can pin it.

[Rowne]

I just received the file.

That is the damned strangest beep I've ever heard.  That's definitely not an error beep.  That's more like a "Hey, I'm malware and I'm screwing with you!" beep.  That or some archaic error code I've never heard of.  I've got a friend who's more knowledgeable than me in this area, I'm going to pass the file along to him.

So sit tight and wait for updates, they will occur.

[Sketchy boy]

Yeah.  I got spyware.  My stupid brother HAD to look at pron.  I even caught him looking at it.  His excuse was "Im trying to fix the computer."  Riiiight.... By fixing do you mean look at the ladies without cloths on? I don't think so. Now he downloaded alot of crap that whant me to pay so i can get scans and get rid of the spywares and viruses HE gave me.  Dammit!  Why couldn't he have gotten limewire or something and done it?  Say you look at pron you idiot.  Your a guy!  Its natural, geeze! Man he is stupider then a mans idiot.

So dose annyone know and good/reliable/trustworthy software I can get that will get off all this crap? If you do, then please help.  If your going to tell me a story about a monopoly of microsoft and other people creating these viruses to make you buy software or another pc, then your too late you boring person.

[ElectroMotive]

There ya go Boy'o...   

[thegayhare]

Ehh malware  ho ever thought of this crap sould have ther toes flattend one at a time with a sledge hammer then there legs should be broken ar one inch intervals ,  then I'd start on there fingers...

*keyboard shorts out from the foam fleck rages of the bunny*

[Cvstos]

Rowne:

Question for you.  How does Avast and Windows Live OneCare fare in that bulletin?  I do a lot of tech help for friends, and they have random assortments of such programs. Those two are becoming more common.

Sketchy: Ad-aware and Windows Defender are good ones.  Might try Avast (anti-virus software), too.

[Sid]

no no no, nothing like that... but there's usually only one or two beeps, sometimes one of the beeps can be really short, sometimes both are long. (always less than a second in length each though) and it sounds kinda like... I dunno, grinding. I'd send you the example but you don't seem to have any contact.

Just hopping back in because I had the weirdest thought. Is it maybe possible that you hooked up the PC Speaker to the HDD Activity Light? Grinding beeps at odd times including boot-up sounds a bit like the rhythm at which the activity light flickers. Yes, it's possibly the freakiest theory this thread is ever going to see, but it just struck me. In the worst case, you guys got something to laugh about ^^;

Unfortunately, I can't think of a good way to test it right now (unless you got the motherboard manual handy or got a program that is supposed to access the PC Speaker to play a melody or so). [EDIT]Oh, duh. Of course there's an easy test for at least one aspect. Does the HDD Activity Light work?[/EDIT]

Just tossing it in because it also doesn't sound like a regular error beep to me (The download works, but you have to copy and paste the URL since it's hotlink-protected). Maybe Rowne comes back with a better guess (I sure hope so, considering that my guess is about as absurd as it gets ). Let's hope and see o.o

[Jack McSlay]

as for anti-virus, whatever you peeps do, stay very away from AVG!!! that piece of crap updates once an eternity, the resident shield hardly works and often it detects virus and is unable to remove it.

the red channel of the scanner is fried

So how could it get fried?

And what do you mean by powering it up, Jackie? *Is uber-sleepy and cannot use his/her brain*

just remove the power plug and put it back right before scanning. it sometimes help because the scanner is not as hot.

and scanner stuff often fry, because they simply wear out. Scanners aren't quite the most durable pieces of hardware around.

[Aridas]

no no no, nothing like that... but there's usually only one or two beeps, sometimes one of the beeps can be really short, sometimes both are long. (always less than a second in length each though) and it sounds kinda like... I dunno, grinding. I'd send you the example but you don't seem to have any contact.

Just hopping back in because I had the weirdest thought. Is it maybe possible that you hooked up the PC Speaker to the HDD Activity Light? Grinding beeps at odd times including boot-up sounds a bit like the rhythm at which the activity light flickers. Yes, it's possibly the freakiest theory this thread is ever going to see, but it just struck me. In the worst case, you guys got something to laugh about ^^;

Unfortunately, I can't think of a good way to test it right now (unless you got the motherboard manual handy or got a program that is supposed to access the PC Speaker to play a melody or so). [EDIT]Oh, duh. Of course there's an easy test for at least one aspect. Does the HDD Activity Light work?[/EDIT]

Just tossing it in because it also doesn't sound like a regular error beep to me (The download works, but you have to copy and paste the URL since it's hotlink-protected). Maybe Rowne comes back with a better guess (I sure hope so, considering that my guess is about as absurd as it gets ). Let's hope and see o.o

I'll accept that if you have an explanation for the PC speaker cable to magically jump out of its connector, change shape, and share the HDD light, and actually make beeps. As I said, it comes on at only semi-predictable times. Not HD activity. The plug itself is one big plug, so it only fits one way (rather than everything being separated. Keeps morons from plugging in the wrong things in the wrong way and place despite all the labels.)

Also, it only just happened all of a sudden. I had left the computer at school (as I've done plenty of times when being a filthy software pirate) and had it on, since... well... Every single computer in the school is always left on anyway. So, when I came back in the next day, the kids and teachers told me it had been beeping like that. It doesn't LOOK like anything's changed, and everything's working as it should, so I don't know.

[Rowne]

TGH: As an ardent defender of machines, I'd have to agree with you.  Although in most cases, these people simply need their computers taken from them and they need to be placed in rehab.  It often stems from them being so socially inept, they hate the World at large and they'd do anything to hurt it.  The malware writer is the poor man's Mad Scientist, where they don't have the balls, brains or motivation to do any better in their plans for conquest.

In the end, I feel pity for them more than I feel anything else because if this is what their life accomplishments account to, it's really very sad.  I can't hate them because they probably live shitty enough lives as it is.

Then there are the big corporations of course that write spyware and rootkits, folks like Sony and those behind StarForce.  When it comes to those guys, I think they should be stripped of their job and moneys and made homeless for a while, that'll set them straight.  I think they're a bigger problem than the virus writers personally because they do their best to keep their viruses away from the antivirus scanners and if you ask me, stuff like StarForce is as bad a form of malware as malware that's designed to be malware.

Sorry, didn't mean to go off on a tangent there, just airing some thoughts.

Cvstos: I can't check exactly because their archive seems to be temporarily offline but I know Avast fairs badly.  I remember it had something like (not exact numbers) 23 fails, 3 successes and 8 no submits.  This is why I worry when people use these free scanners, sure they're free but people would have as much success placing a wet sponge atop their computer cases and claiming that that was their anti-malware defense mechanism.

I'm not sure about OneCare but if it's free I can't imagine it fairs much better if it's another free one.  The thing is, if they're not bringing in a cashflow in order to hire a large staff to keep plugging away at these viruses, they're not likely to have very up to date virus signatures, they're only likely to steal them from other scanners which've recently updated.  That means that they'll always be behind the pack.

Like I said though, I can't say anything conclusively about OneCare until I can check, so I'll let you know when the archive's back up.

As for Windows Defender, I've learned to like that program.  It considers StarForce to be spyware and asks before installing it.  This is a very, very, very good thing.  I recently proved to their company that I can force their software to bluescreen even when nothing is tampering with or even directly interacting with their drivers or games, even outside of the game itself when StarForce shouldn't be doing anything and I proved conclusively it was their drivers doing too.  I still haven't had a response off them yet, they like ignoring people who've found genuine evidence to support the claims against their software.

I recommend that everyone should have Windows Defender installed if only as an easy front-line defense against StarForce.

Beeps: I'm going to pass those onto a knowledgeable friend of mine as soon as I can get hold of him.  I'm with Sid though, not on the HDD stuff, not so sure about that but about the beeps being the strangest bloody thing ever.  I've never heard a PC beep like that in my life and I've had/worked with many, many PCs.

Aridas, I know it's not what you want to hear but I'm still 90 per cent convinced that it's unknown (and thus not easily detectable) malware, possibly even something that a friend or someone you know has written up to screw with you.  It just sounds too ... alien to be normal.  If my friend doesn't recognize it, I'm going to have to recommend we go through your system, active processes, services and so on to see if we can find anything that shouldn't be there.

[Sid]

Just hopping back in because I had the weirdest thought. Is it maybe possible that you hooked up the PC Speaker to the HDD Activity Light? Grinding beeps at odd times including boot-up sounds a bit like the rhythm at which the activity light flickers. Yes, it's possibly the freakiest theory this thread is ever going to see, but it just struck me. In the worst case, you guys got something to laugh about ^^;

I'll accept that if you have an explanation for the PC speaker cable to magically jump out of its connector, change shape, and share the HDD light, and actually make beeps. As I said, it comes on at only semi-predictable times. Not HD activity. The plug itself is one big plug, so it only fits one way (rather than everything being separated. Keeps morons from plugging in the wrong things in the wrong way and place despite all the labels.)

Darn, I need one of those all-in-one plugs. I always have to fiddle with a flashlight and squint at all the labels while also keeping the manual nearby. Okay, since you so thoroughly managed to rule out this absurd option, I'm pretty much back in the "No Idea" land.

Maybe a "friend" installed some gag program on your comp and included it in one of the startup files (Startup Folder, Registry, or maybe even the Autoexec.bat (if that actually stays in effect when Windows is up and running))? The "I left it unguarded" bit brings up all my alarm bells somehow.

Only thing somehow speaking against it would be that this also happens during POST. Very, VERY odd indeed. O_o

EDIT: Darn, Modify-Ninja'd by Rowne. Excuse the potential redundancy
MORE EDIT: *curses* Memo to self: Write a quick fix to avoid having crippled quotes. *fixes quote manually*

[SARCASM]
Rowne, you should know that everybody speaking against StarForce is a member of an organized Pirate Ring. StarForce is the best software protection that never produces errors on computers. Ever. So your "proof" is of course absurd and flawed by design. I bet it's so silly that it doesn't even deserve an answer from them. Oh, and only those filthy mafia pirates spread lies about StarForce producing errors in the vain hope that producers abandon it.
[/SARCASM]

Jokes and propaganda talk aside, I occasionally go to the SF Forums and read a few heated debates with the Admins there when I need a good laugh.

[Rowne]

[SARCASM]
Rowne, you should know that everybody speaking against StarForce is a member of an organized Pirate Ring. StarForce is the best software protection that never produces errors on computers. Ever. So your "proof" is of course absurd and flawed by design. I bet it's so silly that it doesn't even deserve an answer from them. Oh, and only those filthy mafia pirates spread lies about StarForce producing errors in the vain hope that producers abandon it.
[/SARCASM]

Ai keell ju-- oh, right, sarcasm.  You were only making fun of that kind of person.  *Cough.*  Okay.  Sorry, I find that my anti-apologist defenses act up and with all my exposure to those kinds of people, I'm even having trouble distinguishing between humourous and genuine statements.  I could weep openly, weep I tell you, weep!

I agree with you though, the forums are an awful place but the admins aren't the worst of them, the worst are the actual users who're clueless even in the face of real evidence.  These people are called apologists.

Some people think the lowest form of life is the telemarketer, I disagree, it's the apologist!