It is said that words are the tools of the great, and there are some good things that have been said. Post anything that has been said that you like. Could be funny, serious, scary, thoughtful--anything. Can be one sentance short, or paragraphs long (if you're willing to type that). Can come from any source. Can even be in another language, so long as you translate >:3
The original thread (http://clockworkmansion.com/forum/index.php/topic,2896.0.html) had some pretty nice quotes during its time.
I'll start out with one of my personal favorites:
"Hey look buddy, I'm an engineer, and that means I solve problems. Not problems like "what is beauty?", because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosphy. I solve practical problems! For instance: How am I gonna stop some big, mean, mother-humper from tearing me a structurally superflous new behind? The answer: Use a gun, and if that don't work,
Use more gun!"
-Engineer, Meet the Engineer, Team Fortress 2
A day without a nap is a day wasted. -- A friend of mine.
If you let everyone else guide your thoughts, why have any of your own? -- Unknown
So how about we skip the part where you are pretending to be interested in what I'm saying, and I'm pretending I'm not two seconds away from smashing the stupid out of your skull! Ok? -- Abel, DMFA
Mr. Madison, what you just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. -- Billy Madison
As soft as a marshmellow and twice as tasty... -- Janus Whitefurr
I am your constant companion. I am your greatest helper or your heaviest burden. I will push you onward or drag you down to failure. I am completely at your command. Half the things you do, you might just as well turn over to me, and I will be able to do them quickly, correctly. I am easily managed; you must merely be firm with me. Show me exactly how you want something done, and after a few lessons I will do it automatically. I am the servant of all great men. And, alas, of all failures as well. Those who are great, I have made great. I am not a machine, though I work with all the precision of a machine. Plus, the intelligence of man. You may run me for profit, or run me for ruin; it makes no difference to me. Take me, train me, be firm with me and I will put the world at your feet. Be easy with me, and I will destroy you. Who am I? I am Habit. -- Unknown
:januscat
"But it was so artistically done" Grand Admiral Thrawn.
"Precisely. And the more they deny it, the more the Romulans will think that they are guilty because it is exactly what they would have done in their place. That's why you came to me. Isn't it, Captain? Because you knew I could do those things that you weren't capable of doing. Well, it worked. And you'll get what you want: a war between the Romulans and the Dominion. And if your conscience is bothering you, you should soothe it with the knowledge that you may have just saved the entire Alpha Quadrant. And in the end all it cost was the life of one Romulan senator, one criminal, and the self-respect of one Starfleet officer. I don't know about you, but I'd call that a bargain. " Elim Garak
"A NAME IS A CLOAK OF LETTERS THROWN ABOUT A MAN. IT MEANS NOTHING" The Transcendant One.
"So, which part of that idea was the 'Good' part?" - My Science Teacher.
"If you can truly disprove gravity, I'll help you get it published." -my science teacher.
"I reject your reality, and substitute my own." - Adam Savage
"Tell them how I am Defying gravity! I'm flying high, Defying gravity! And soon I'll match them in renown. And nobody in, all of Oz, No Wizard that there is or was, Is ever gonna bring me down!" - Elphaba, Wicked
"The only ones who should kill are those who are prepared to be killed." - Lelouch Lamperouge, Code Geass
"I, Lelouch vi Britannia command you, now all of you... DIE." - the same
I'll probably come up with a few more later. No, wait! One more.
"NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS!" - Amber Williams
"Remember, remember, the fifth of November. The gunpowder treason and plot. I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason should ever be forgot." -Various from V for Vendetta.
"I know Ozma is straight, But Im alright even though he'll only a lover in my dreams. Ive gone into the point of my life where I no longer feel the need for my love to be reciprocated"
-Bobby Margot, Macross Frontier
"No matter how far we go, humans will always be alone... But its because that we are alone... THAT WE LEARN TO LOVE SOMEONE!"
-Brera Stern and Alto Saotome, Macross Frontier
"YOU DID WHAT IN MY ROBOT?! >:O" -Personal Quote.
(In my high school Genocide and Human Behavior class, when we learned the Pope did nothing to stop the Nazis)
Me: "If they [the Vatican] HAD confronted the Nazis, wouldn't they just have gone harder on the Jews?"
Mr. Abrams: "Hmm, that's a very good question. Would you mind telling me what would have been harder than what they went through?"
Me: "....."
"Will SOMEONE SHUT that kid UP!!"
-Gregory House
Marik: "Foolish fools! There are no women in Yu-Gi-Oh! There are only extremely girly men! And I am the most girly of them all!"
Pegasus: "Keep telling yourself that."
-Marik's Evil Council of Doom
"I think the only reason Fred and Daphne were [on Scooby-Doo] was so there'd be pretty people on the team. (beat) I also think that water's wet."
-Me
I have no doubt that I will post more quotes up here. :)
"Try it. Just see how many pieces you end up in." -Moi.
"Touch me and die, vermin." Illyria, Angel.
"If you utter so much as one syllable, I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH!!"-The Grinch.
Hear that sound? It's the gates of the netherworld, opening to take you away... --Luther/Lucifer, Star Ocean: Till the End of Time
Feel the pain of those inferior beings as you burn in hell! --Kratos Aurion, Tales of Symphonia
:januscat
"The stench of terror drifts on a bitter wind. The people pray for strength and guidance. They should pray for the mercy of a swift death, for I have seen what the darkness hides." ~Diablo III cinematic trailer.
Quote from: Meany on December 07, 2008, 02:14:38 PM
"If you utter so much as one syllable, I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH!!"-The Grinch.
"If you'd like to fax me, press the star key!"
-Continuation of above quote :3
Kakashi: "Creepy summoning circle, check. Underage boy with shirt off, check. Creepy Michael Jackson look-alike who likes little boys... Crap. Where am I going to find one of those?"
Orochimaru: "Hello, Kakashi."
Kakashi (turns around): "Sweet!"
- Naruto the Abridged Series
A monk asked Yunmen, "What is Buddha?"
Yunmen said, "Kanshiketsu!"
-Koan
"'If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight!' Sun Tzu said that, and I would think he knew a little bit more about fighting than you do, because he invented it. And then he perfected it so that nobody could best him in the ring of honor. Then he used all his fight money to buy two of every animal and he herded them onto a boat, where he beat the crap out of them. And from that day on whenever two or more animals are together in one place it's called a zoo!"
- The Soldier from Team Fortress 2
"OM NOM NOM, NOM OM NUM." - The Heavy from Team Fortress 2.
Mmm... Sandvich.
Quote from: Keaton the Black Jackal on December 08, 2008, 05:22:49 PM
"'If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight!' Sun Tzu said that, and I would think he knew a little bit more about fighting than you do, because he invented it. And then he perfected it so that nobody could best him in the ring of honor. Then he used all his fight money to buy two of every animal and he herded them onto a boat, where he beat the crap out of them. And from that day on whenever two or more animals are together in one place it's called a zoo!"
- The Soldier from Team Fortress 2
UNLESS IT'S A FARM!
- continuation of above.
"I am heavy weapons guy,
this is my weapon. She weighs 150 kilograms and fires $200 custom tooled cartridges at 10,000 rounds per minute. It costs 400,000 dollars to fire this weapon for 12 seconds..."
- The Heavy from Team Fortress 2
"The mouth is like a gate, opening it lets the soldiers of stupidity into the world." Jeff Vogel, Geneforge 2
"With one part of my mind I thought of the British Raj as an unbreakable tyranny, as something clamped down, in saecula saeculorum, upon the will of prostrate peoples; with another part I thought that the greatest joy in the world would be to drive a bayonet into a Buddhist priest's guts. Feelings like these are the normal by-products of imperialism; ask any Anglo-Indian official, if you can catch him off duty."
-The Narrator: George Orwell, Shooting an Elephant
GRINCH: I tell you Max, I don't know why I ever leave this place. I've got allll the company I need...right here. *sits down in chair facing big cavern*
GRINCH: Hello!
ECHO: Hello!...hello...hello...
GRINCH: How are you?
ECHO: How are you?...are you...are you...
GRINCH: I asked you first!
ECHO: I asked you first!...first...first
GRINCH: Oh, that's reeeally mature, saying exactly what I say!
ECHO: mature...mature...exactly what I say...I say...
GRINCH: ...I'm an idiot!
ECHO: YOU'RE AN IDIOT!...idiot...idiot...
GRINCH: *jerks in frustration* [whispering] All right, fine. I'm not talking to you anymore. In fact, I'm going to whisper, so by the time the sound of my voice reverberates off the walls, and gets back to me, I won't be able to hear eeet!
ECHO: ...YOU'RE AN IDIOT!...idiot...idiot...
GRINCH: o_0
-The Grinch
Mario: all toaster's, toast toast.
Me: WTF?!?
MYFriends: riiiggghht
Freakazoid "Dumb dumb dumb, never tell the villian how to trap you in a cage"
Dr Guitezrez "You probably shouldn't have helped us build it either"
apparently nobody's a fan of mass effect quotes... and there were a couple of great ones too
"Your words are as hollow as your future human, for your end is nigh" - sovereign
"am i here for your entertainment, do i just walk around and make bubbly, sputtery noises? do i amuse you? that's sure as hell what it seems when you offer me insults instead of payment" - Cpt. Shepard
"How did boat get into lake? It would take many men many hours to carry." Conscript ( Redalert3)
Quote from: VSMIT on December 07, 2008, 01:59:04 AM
"Remember, remember, the fifth of November. The gunpowder treason and plot. I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason should ever be forgot." -Various from V for Vendetta.
I love that one.
"Hey, We're in enemy territory. Those are enemy birds!" Squa!! - Avatar, the last air bender
"Ya, My first girlfriend turned into the moon."
"That's tough dude."
- Avatar, the air bender
ISHIZU: "We've uncovered rare artifacts that depict the earliest game played in Egypt. Behold, Kaiba, the origin of Duel Monsters!"
(the lights go up to reveal...)
KAIBA: "Oh my God, a giant rock!"
ISHIZU: "That's right, Kaiba. A giant rock."
KAIBA: "I can't believe what I'm seeing! A giant rock! It's a rock and it's giant!"
ISHIZU (looking somewhere else): "Yes, and that's not all. Come over here, and prepare to witness something incredible."
KAIBA (walking over): "Okay, but it's gonna be pretty tough to beat that giant rock..."
ISHIZU: "What you're about to see will change your life forever."
KAIBA (looks up at...): "Oh my God, ANOTHER giant rock!!"
-YuGiOh the Abridged Series, Episode 24
"One of the foulest cross-country runs that ever occurred outside of Dante's Inferno."
- P.G. Wodehouse: Psmith Journalist
"I do so hate having to have an enemy killed. It's like announcing to the world that you can't solve a problem creatively."
-Lex Luthor
"Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get, and it usually sucks." --Anonymous.
:januscat
"The kitten... was all the motivation I needed. I'm going to kill you."
And the follow-up...
"(punch) This is for Sand! (punch) This is for me! (lifts a heavy thing to throw) And THIS is for MUFFIN!"
-The Spirit
"Do that again and I'll feed your liver to the ravens." -Me, just after someone pulled my ponytail.
"Why do today what I could put off 'till tomorrow?" "What's today but yesterday's tomorrow?" -Exchange between Squidward and Mr. Krabs.
"All we are is dust in the wind, dude." -Ted Theodore Logan
"nowhere to hide, nowhere to run, your village will burn like the heart of the sun... with infinite glee, it will be me, to slaughter your world" - Richard, from LFG
Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
-Calvin, Calvin and Hobbes
"I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space does a raw blink on Hara-kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!" --'Colonel Campbell', Metal Gear Solid 2
"Soo, now that your done self-congratulating yourself, do you want a cookie, a medal or a small parade?" - me, after loosing a game of beer pong earlier
Edit: this morning i had a moment of brilliance that i found hilarious, and felt it worth sharing... my roommate asked what happened last night, this was my response
"well, lets see, you drunkenly took out a coffee table, you tried to hit on our neighbor while she was hitting on me, you blew chunks all over her floor then tried to blame duke for it... you lost your phone, then you passed out on your bed at like 3am by spreading your arms and shouting 'BED!!!'... oh and apparently at like 4am, while your wasted i bare a striking resemblance to someone named Gabi..."
"You always wanted this knowledge...you can have it." --Rendall Crane, Stories of Vaa'saide
"Death is for amateurs." --Butcher, Butcher's Legacy
"Life is sacred, but sometimes desecration can become necessary. They never saw the tears in my eyes at what I had done." --Jakob, The Chronicles of Jakob Pettersohn
"I shall wear your souls around my neck. I swore to make you suffer for this, and you WILL suffer! For ever and ever!
Amen." --Jakob, The Chronicles of Jakob Pettersohn
:januscat
"We are all aware that the senses can be deceived, the eyes fooled. But how can we be sure our senses are not being deceived at any particular time, or even all the time? Might I just be a brain in a tank somewhere, tricked all my life into believing in the events of this world by some insane computer? And does my life gain or lose meaning based on my reaction to such solipsism?"
-Project PYRRHO, Specimen 46, Vat 7 (Subject termination advised), Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri
"This is not a retreat. We are simply initiating an offensive in the opposite direction." -General Edmund Duke
"We sit together,
the mountain and I,
until only the mountain remains."
--Li Po
"A handsome young Cyborg named Ace,
Wooed women at every base,
But once ladies glanced at
His special enhancement
They vanished with nary a trace."
--Barracks Graffiti
Sparta Command, Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri
Quote from: Tyranastrasz on January 25, 2009, 08:15:15 PM
"This is not a retreat. We are simply initiating an offensive in the opposite direction." -General Edmund Duke
Whoa, is that quote from the game, or from a book? It's ringing a bell for me...
Quote from: Orion Asmodeus Dezagrats on January 25, 2009, 09:19:00 PM
"A handsome young Cyborg named Ace,
Wooed women at every base,
But once ladies glanced at
His special enhancement
They vanished with nary a trace."
--Barracks Graffiti
Sparta Command, Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri
Darn you,
I was gonna use that as my next quote! >:[
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,
it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness,
it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity...
(and it was all very much like now)
~A Tale of Two Cities
"Dear Buddha, please bring me a pony, and a plastic rocket..."
~Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly
"It's like God is playing darts with your life." ~friend
"Well, if I try to drink you printer in the morning, don't say I didn't warn you.." ~friend
"Shh! I'm asking God to smite you!" ~friend
"Solicitations malefactors! I am endeavouring to misappropriate the formulary for the preparation of affordable comestibles! WHO WILL JOIN ME!?" (gets promptly beaten up by barroom thugs he was attempting to enlist)
- Plankton, Spongebob Squarepants
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on January 25, 2009, 11:27:30 PM
Quote from: Tyranastrasz on January 25, 2009, 08:15:15 PM
"This is not a retreat. We are simply initiating an offensive in the opposite direction." -General Edmund Duke
Whoa, is that quote from the game, or from a book? It's ringing a bell for me...
It is from one of the books contained within the Starcraft Archives, I believe. Second one, I think.
Anyway...
"Well, [anonymous friend] is stuck going to [that crappy high school noone else from our elementary school is going to next year], so let's say a few words for him now..." ~Friend 1
"...He's gay." ~Friends 1 and 2 simultaneously
If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh. - Magus, Crono Trigger
In our world, every storm has an end. Every night brings a new day. What's important is to trust those you love, and never give up. We must never give up hope! - A priestess, Crono Trigger
Liar! I was a perfect lady last night! Uhhhh.... why does my tummy hurt? - Lucca, Crono Trigger
Am I a butterfly dreaming I'm a man? Or a bowling ball dreaming I'm a plate of sashimi? Never assume what you see and feel is real! - Doreen, Crono Trigger
The black wind blows... One of you will shortly perish. - Janus, Crono Trigger
There's a letter. Shall we burn it? - Magus, Crono Trigger
Even a man made Legend is but a babe in the face of Time. - Aeon, Castlevania Judgment
No matter how powerful the magic you wield, you will never surpass time. - Aeon, Castlevenia Judgment
Even the Lord of Darkness cannot escape time. - Aeon, Castlevania Judgement
"I was perfectly fine until the assassins stole my pants and tried to shoot me." -Chuck
'God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.'
- Terry Pratchett
Thunder rolled...
It rolled a six.
"You know what I think?" said Vimes. "I think it went somewhere."
Thunder rolled again.
"All right, all right," muttered Vimes. "It was just a thought. It wasn't that dramatic."
Both from Terry Pratchet's Guards! Guards!
Rule #142 of the Evil Overlord List:
"If I have children and subsequently grandchildren, I will keep my three-year-old granddaughter near me at all times. When the hero enters to kill me, I will ask him to first explain to her why it is necessary to kill her beloved grandpa. when the hero launches into an explanation of morality way over her head, that will be her cue to pull the lever and send him into the pit of crocodiles. After all, small children like crocodiles almost as much as Evil Overlords, and it's important to spend quality time with the grandkids."
"Answer: Select grenades, sonic screamers, cluster rockets, and plasma charges. Mines are also effective, since many Jedi will run to meet you in hand to hand combat. Silly Jedi."
-HK-47, on how to kill Jedi
"*glare*Can you feel the lasers burning into your skull?!"
-English Goddess Ms. Richards
"in the event of a fire in the building, please run around in circles, trampling as many of your fellow classmates as possible while screaming 'oh my god, oh my god were all going to die' at the top of your lungs... and in the event of a tornado... well... i don't really know how well these seats are bolted down, but... if you've got some rope, that might help"
My econ prof's mandatory 'safety' lecture