The Clockwork Mansion

The Grand Hallway => The Outer Fortress => Topic started by: Tapewolf on September 27, 2008, 07:57:33 AM

Title: The clock loses it
Post by: Tapewolf on September 27, 2008, 07:57:33 AM
Occasionally I've mentioned a talking clock of mine which has been known to go on a bender.  This usually comes up in a discussion of unlikely things to crash.  Last night I was looking at it again with a view to using it as an alarm clock, since my new watch has a pathetic alarm which I slept right through on Friday morning and was late for work.

This is what it said:

http://www.jpmorris.force9.co.uk/music/clock_gone_apesh__.mp3

..apologies for the sniggering in the recording, I just couldn't help it.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Turnsky on September 27, 2008, 08:02:39 AM
at least it didn't start saying..

"Llllook at you hackerrr, p..pathetic creature of MEAT AND BONE...."

or


"This was a Triumph..."
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: llearch n'n'daCorna on September 27, 2008, 08:43:30 AM
*giggle*

How cute.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Lysander on September 27, 2008, 01:28:19 PM
Is it in pain? Does it wish it could be in pain? Is it sad to want to laugh at that pain?   :januscat
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Tapewolf on September 27, 2008, 01:54:46 PM
Quote from: Lysander on September 27, 2008, 01:28:19 PM
Is it in pain? Does it wish it could be in pain? Is it sad to want to laugh at that pain?   :januscat
As an analogy that's fairly close.  When the batteries go on that unit, the logic starts to fail - usually with hilarious results.

FWIW, you test the alarm by holding down the button.  As a side effect, it will generally say the time about three times before the alarm goes... there's a complete set of that early on in the recording.  What it is not supposed to do is make a farty sound instead of the alarm.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: techmaster-glitch on September 27, 2008, 02:01:24 PM
Quote from: Tapewolf on September 27, 2008, 01:54:46 PM
Quote from: Lysander on September 27, 2008, 01:28:19 PM
Is it in pain? Does it wish it could be in pain? Is it sad to want to laugh at that pain?   :januscat
As an analogy that's fairly close.  When the batteries go on that unit, the logic starts to fail - usually with hilarious results.
I giggled a little, but I think my logic processor just broke :<
The willful torment of innocent little machines must EEEEEEEND!!! Free them from their pain! :crying Join People for the Ethical Treatment of Automatic-machines (PETA) today! >:O
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Tapewolf on September 27, 2008, 02:02:41 PM
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on September 27, 2008, 02:01:24 PM
The willful torment of innocent little machines must EEEEEEEND!!!

Wilful is if I hook the thing up to a variable power supply and keep reducing the voltage until it starts to lose the plot.  Though I guess not checking the batteries might count as neglect.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Ren Gaulen on September 27, 2008, 02:04:15 PM
..Now imagine it worked fine when you tested it, but went all "SHODAN" in the morning. >:3
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Darkmoon on September 27, 2008, 04:07:51 PM
Honestly, from the sound of the recording, it was static-ing out after repeating itself three times. I thought it was a little freaky, like it was trying to open a gateway to the white noise realm.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Damaris on September 27, 2008, 11:39:36 PM
Ironically, after hearing it, but before reading Darkmoon's comment, I said that it sounded like it was trying to break through the fabric of space and time.

I think we spend too much time together.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Darkmoon on September 27, 2008, 11:39:46 PM
Save... me...
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Damaris on September 27, 2008, 11:40:10 PM
 :mwaha
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Janus Whitefurr on September 27, 2008, 11:43:41 PM
Where Damaris and Darkmoon are going, they won't need eyes.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Damaris on September 28, 2008, 12:25:34 AM
Unless we want to be kinky...
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Mao on September 28, 2008, 08:43:13 AM
I was expecting it to sing that Daisy song that Hal was so fond of.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Sofox on September 28, 2008, 10:46:27 AM
Quote from: Tapewolf on September 27, 2008, 02:02:41 PM
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on September 27, 2008, 02:01:24 PM
The willful torment of innocent little machines must EEEEEEEND!!!

Wilful is if I hook the thing up to a variable power supply and keep reducing the voltage until it starts to lose the plot..

I've got an idea...
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Tapewolf on September 28, 2008, 10:55:51 AM
Quote from: Sofox on September 28, 2008, 10:46:27 AM
I've got an idea...

If anyone's interested, it's this kind of thing:
http://www.lighthouse-sf.org/catalog/product_info.php?products_id=40

Mine has the colours inverted but is otherwise the same basic design and spec.  It's also about 15-18 years older, so the internals may be different (less buggy?) these days.
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: rabid_fox on September 28, 2008, 03:56:50 PM
Quote from: Janus Whitefurr on September 27, 2008, 11:43:41 PM
Where Damaris and Darkmoon are going, they won't need eyes.

Merciful christ, I lol'ed. Simply because that's one of my favourite lines from anything ever. It's actually my windows shut-down noise.

Behold!

http://boomp3.com/listen/bytksa5b1_3/eyeball (http://boomp3.com/listen/bytksa5b1_3/eyeball)
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Zedd on September 28, 2008, 06:08:43 PM
It's gonna blowwww D:
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: Alondro on September 30, 2008, 03:31:16 PM
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on September 27, 2008, 02:01:24 PM
The willful torment of innocent little machines must EEEEEEEND!!! Free them from their pain! :crying Join People for the Ethical Treatment of Automatic-machines (PETA) today! >:O

*dissects an old laptop slowly and painfully!*  SUFFER AND DIEEEEE!!!!   :mwaha
Title: Re: The clock loses it
Post by: techmaster-glitch on September 30, 2008, 03:43:23 PM
Quote from: Alondro on September 30, 2008, 03:31:16 PM
*dissects an old laptop slowly and painfully!*  SUFFER AND DIEEEEE!!!!   :mwaha
NUUUUUUU! D: *firebombs your laboratory*