Essentially, engage and respond in conversation with quotes form movies, TV, games, whatever. Only thing is, name a source. You can go anonymous to fulfill your dirty non-quoting needs, but point is, it's a source. A vague source, but okay.
I'll start.
"I LIKE SOUP." - Tain Toosmart (NPC) in Magical Starsign
"NO-ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!"
-- Monty Python and The Holy Grail
"I p-p-peed fear..." - Ethan McManus in an archived Sillie from Ctrl-Alt-Del
"Sometimes...sometimes the diaper leaks."
-VG Cats #201
"It's a really fun and exciting gameplay mechanic... in theory." Text from Ctrl Alt Del comic "Spored"
"I have balls of steel." - Duke Nukem
"You need a pair these (picture of metallic spheres), to play one of these (picture of old SNK system)" - old SNK ad, as seen by myself in an episode of Icons.
"This.. is my BOOMSTICK!!" - Ash.. Housewares.
"This... is... Sparta!!" King Leonidas, 300
"This is no Zaku, my boy, NO Zaku!" - Ramba Ral, "Mobile Suit Gundam".
"It's a Gundam! It's a Gundam!" - Random Mecha Mook, Gundam Wing
"There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you. ..I been sayin' that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker before you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. Now I'm thinkin': it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could be you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that. But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd." - Jules, "Pulp Fiction".
"Seriously... What. The. Frig." --Jyrras
"A race of Bosom people set forth on an armada of bosoms to search for a new bosom homeworld. Bosoms, Mellons, Milk Factories, Busts, Funbags, Knockers, Balliestigs, Boobies, Jugs, Nipples, Jubblies... Stonking great tits!" -Yahtzee Crenshaw
"Wildy! Please put on a shirt so I can yell at you properly!" - Jyrras
"Nakedness reveals itself. Nudity is placed on display. The nude is condemned to never being naked. Nudity is a form of dress." - John Berger
"Speaking of address (a dress), you look good in one!"
-Joco, Shaman King, English anime dub.
"I make this look good."
-J, Men in Black
"Because, good is Dumb." -Darth Helmet
"No sir, I didn't see you playing with your dolls!" - Sanders, Spaceballs
"Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger." -J.R.R.Tolkien
"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and good with ketchup."
-- random tshirt, usenet .sig
"EEEEK! FIRE!" The Dragon, from LOOM.
"See you around fluff-tuft."~Abel
"I am not Pizza", - Soldato J, from the English dub of "GaoGaiGar".
"English Motherf###er! Do you speak it?" -Come on, do I really need to say it?
"I only speak two languages, English and bad English" - Corban Dallas, The Fifth Element
(and yes, Jer-oh-me, you do: I don't think I've ever seen that movie, only seen the line referenced)
"This is the end of the road!" - Hotrod, "Transformers: The Movie" (1986).
"This is the end for you, my Master" - Anakin, RotS
"I've got a brand new combine harvester, and I'll give you the key..."
-- The Wurzels. And also Alien Dead...
"LORD, WHAT CAN THE HARVEST HOPE FOR, IF NOT FOR THE CARE OF THE REAPER MAN?" - Death, Reaper Man
"Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?"
"No. Have you?"
- Hudson and Vasquez respectively, "Aliens".
"Um... I assume that most humans can't do that?" - Billious the Oh God of Hangovers, Hogfather
"Outstanding. Now all we need is a deck of cards."
-- Hicks.
"You always were an asshole, Gorman."
-- Vasquez.
"He's coming in. I feel safer already." - Hudson
"It only kills monsters." - Twyla, Hogdfather, referring to the nursery poker that just went through Death and killed Mr. Teatime.
Burke: Look, Ripley.
Ripley: Yes?
Burke: This is a multi-million dollar installation, okay? He can't make that kind of decision, he's just a grunt!
[to Hicks]
Burke: Ah, no offense.
Hicks: None taken.
-- Aliens.
"Ludicrous! Why are you listening to this fellow? May I remind you, he's wearing a costume, not a uniform! He's no more qualified to lead us than this fellow. [to Guy] No offense." - Sir Alexander Dane (Dr. Lazarus), Galaxy Quest
"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh. Beneath this mask there is an idea, Mr. Creedy, and ideas are bulletproof." - V, "V for Vendetta".
"A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on. Ideas have endurance without death." - John Fitzgerald Kennedy
"No, there aren't [causes worth dying for]! Because you've only got one life but you can pick up another five causes on any street corner!" - Rincewind, Interesting Times
"You're good with words, Todd. But you know what would make them even better? If they had a heartbeat."
-Professor Malley, Lions for Lambs
"People suck. People have turned you from a guy with a swollen tongue into a guy with one eye, one ball and a stapled-on face. If you want someone to hold you while you cry yourself to sleep at night, choose warm and soft. If you want someone to write you a poem, pick the sensitive loner. If all you care about is that something's done right, pick the guy with the metal head." -Dr. House
Error.
"They mostly come at night. Mostly."
-- Aliens.
Bob Page: "Soon, I will become pure energy. I will burn like the brightest star."
JC Denton: "You're gonna burn, all right."
-- "Deus EX".
"It's not about money, it's about...sending a message. Everything burns."
-The Joker, The Dark Knight
"Just as a fire is covered by smoke and a mirror is obscured by dust, just as the embryo rests deep within the womb, wisdom is hidden by selfish desire." ~Bhagavad Gita
"That will be your butt."
-Graf Zeppelin (Malkavian Mod, Deus Ex)
"I have opened PILLS."
-- Same as above. :3
"They had me inject the soldiers with DEATH."
-Strange Doctor (Malkavian Mod, Deus Ex)
"See you again REAL soon. (laughing) Oh, oh, is he joking?"
-Death, Family Guy
"I never joke about my work." - Q
"The spice must flow."
-- "Dune".
"You said that three dunes ago!" - Barf, Spaceballs
"We ain't found shit!"
-"Spaceballs"
"So this is the power of The Power!.. (http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh121/RentheKnight/A%20Bunch%20of%20Random%20Pictures/ThepowerofTHEPOWER.png)"
-- English fan subs for "GaoGaiGar".
"If only you knew the power of the Dark Side!"
-Darth Vader
"Destiny.. You cannot destroy.. my destiny!.."
-- Unicron, "Transformers: The Movie" (1986).
THE LAWYERS OF FATE DEMAND A LOOPHOLE IN EVERY PROPHECY.
-Death
All your base are belong to us.
-Do I really have to?
"Very violent sport, isn't it, baseball..."
- Captain Hook, Hook
"Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, next to soccer." - Loki, Dogma
"What connects two thousand years of genocide? Too much power in too few hands." ~Simon Wiesenthal
"Arbeit Macht Frei"
-Gates of Auschwitz
"Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate"
-Gates of Hell
"Donde escono que' vortici di foco pien d'orror?"
(Whence come these hideous spurts of flame?)
-Don Giovanni
'Hell from beneath is moved for thee to meet thee at thy coming: it stirreth up the dead for thee, even all the cheif ones of the earth; it hath raised up from their thrones all the kings of the nations.'
- Isaiah, 14:9
"If I were a rich man..."
-Tevye, Fiddler on the Roof
"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."
-Dorothy Parker
'Listen to me! You have to consider the possibility that God does not like you. He never wanted you. In all probability, he hates you. This is not the worst thing that can happen.'
- Tyler Durden
"I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness..."
-Allen Ginsberg, Howl
"Madness has brought you here to me. I shall be your undoing!" ~ Prince Malchezzar, World of Warcraft.
"Madness? This is Sparta!" - King Leonidas, 300
Stop kicking people into the pit of death! Honestly!
-Traitoro, Meet the Spartans
"Stop blowing holes in my ship!" - Captain Jack Sparrow
"Captain gives the orders on his ship."
"Captain of the ship is givin' orders!"
-Captain Jack Sparrow; Captain Hector Barbossa, Pirates 3.
"Well, you can't." Captain Mal Reynolds, Serenity
"Yes I can."
-Annie Oakley, Annie, Get Your Gun
"I think I can" - The Little Engine That Could
"NeverMakeItNeverMakeItNeverMakeIt."
-- Lucky Day, The Three Amigos.
"Well, you told me I have a plethora. And I just would like to know if you know what a plethora is. I would not like to think that a person would tell someone he has a plethora, and then find out that that person has *no idea* what it means to have a plethora."
-El Guapo, The Three Amigos.
"You don't just take a woman, you have to wait, and then, like a flower, she will open herself up to you."
"And when will Carmen 'open herself up' to you?"
"Tonight, or I will kill her!"
-- El Guapo and his henchman, whose name I forget, The Three Amigos.
"Oh, great. You killed the invisible swordsman!"
-Lucky Day, same movie.
"You don't want to die with a leetel sissie's gun like that one. You want to die with a man's gun."
-- That henchman, again.
"Do you have anything here besides Mexican food?"
-Dusty Bottoms, same.
"Ey, Hefe, take off your hat."
...
"Hold it up. Higher."
*bang*
*urgh*
*thud*
"These are good guns."
-- El Guapo showing care for his men, The Three Amigos.
"El Guapo only kills men. He does not kill crying women!"
-El Guapo, The Three Amigos.
"Excuse me, are you the singing bush?"
-- Lucky Days, The Three Amigos.
"I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition." -Eric Idle
"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience." - George Bernard Shaw
"The three beats of war, peace, and revolution continue onward eternally." - Marimeia Barton (or however you spell it, and I think I might have missquoted), Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz.
"They're just standing there talking. That's all they ever do. That's all they ever do. That's what they were doing when you asked me last week and when you asked me five minutes ago. So when you ask me five minutes from now 'What are they doing?' my answers gonna be 'They're still just standing there and they're still just talking.'" Pvt. Church, Red vs Blue
"What are they saying?"~ Pvt. Tucker, RvB.
Neither enemy faces, nor the mothers that love them, come to mind when one is thinking of nothing but endeavouring to survive. Philosophising about war is useless under fire.
-Linda Berdoll, Mr. Darcy Takes A Wife, 2004
Knowing others is wisdom;
Knowing the self is enlightenment.
Mastering others requires force;
Mastering the self requires strength;
He who knows he has enough is rich.
Perseverance is a sign of will power.
He who stays where he is endures.
To die but not to perish is to be eternally present.
-Lu Tze
You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake; you are the same decaying organic matter as everything else.
-- Tyler Durdin, Fight Club
"Certainty? In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes." ~Benjamin Franklin
I am Death, not taxes. I come only once.
-- Death, Discworld
"That's what she said." -Anonymous
"If she is false, heaven mocked itself!"
-Othello, act 3 scene 3
Once I thought my innocence was gone, but then I found that happiness goes on.
-Billy Joel, For the Longest Time
To know others is wisdom
To know yourself is enlightenment.
-Lao Tzu
Relax, have a cigar, make yourself at home. Hell is full of High Court Judges, failed saints. We've got cardinals, archbishops, barristers, certified accountants, music critics, they're all here. You're not alone. You're never alone, not here you're not. OK, breaks over.
-- Sting, Saint Augustine in Hell.
And we walk in fields of gold...
-Sting, Fields of Gold
If you didn't have blood would you still have love or in fact does the blood make you think you have to love?
-Violent Jay, ICP
Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about.
-Trey Parker and Matt Stone
"Eh... Wibbly Wobbly, Timey-Whimey"
-The Doctor
"I dunno: I didn't want to say 'magic door.'" - The Doctor, The Lady in the Fireplace
"GIVE HIM A SEDAGIVE!"
-Eyegore, Young Frankenstein.
"My grandfather's work was doodoo!" - Frederic "Fronkensteen"
"He vould have an enormous schwanzstucker."
-Inga
"Hallo. Vould you like a roll in ze hay? It's fun. Roll, roll, roll in ze hay." - Inga
"Now it's please. An hour ago I couldn't get the time o' day."
-Sheriff Bart.
"They lose me after the bunker scene" - I'm not saying his name because Godwin will come down on us like a ton of bricks
"Gentlemen, gentlemen, please. Rest your sphincters."
-Hedley Lamarr
"Holy underwear!" - Governor Le Petomane.
"Come over here. Are you out of your mind? Can't you see that man is a ni...."
-LePetomane.
"I'm... tired. Tired of falling in love..." - Lilly Von Stupp
"Responsibility does not only lie with the leaders of our countries or with those who have been appointed or elected to do a particular job. It lies with each of us individually. Peace, for example, starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with those around us.
When our community is in a state of peace, it can share that peace with neighboring communities, and so on. When we feel love and kindness towards others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace. And there are ways in which we can consciously work to develop feelings of love and kindness. For some of us, the most effective way to do so is through religious practice. For others it may be non-religious practices. What is important is that we each make a sincere effort to take our responsibility for each other and for the natural environment we live in seriously."
HH the Dalai Lama ~ The Nobel Lecture, December 11, 1989[/b]
There are only two things that are infinite - the Universe, and Human Stupidity. And I'm not sure about the Universe.
-- Albert Einstein, Certified Genius.
"Power!!! Unlimited power!!!!" - Palpatine
"You ever tried going mad without power? It's boring. No-one listens to you!"
-Russ Cargill, The Simpsons Movie
Stress: The confusion created when the mind overrides the body's basic desire to choke the living shit out of some arsehole who desperately deserves it.
"No TV and no beer make Homer something something."
"Go crazy?"
"Don't MIND IF I DO!!!!"
- Homer and Marge (I think), The Simpsons
Incidentally, Boxy, who said that stress quote? I highly doubt that's the ICD standard.
"My God, Jeffrey. You truly are insane."
(twitch twitch) "...No I'm not."
-Dr. Leland Goines and his son Jeffrey, 12 Monkeys
(I'm pretty sure that's from the Devil's Dictionary, but I could be wrong.)
"You're insane!"
"No, not that, the other thing."
"Superman will never–"
"WRONG!"
- Lois and Lex (Loex, anyone? Just kidding)
"Anonymous", so far as I can tell.
It used to be on a t-shirt of mine, only I wore it to work too many times and it became sacred.
"Why am I here?"
-- Adrian Cronauer, Good Morning Vietnam
"I'm not an officer, I work for a living."
-Can't for the life of me remember, Good Morning Vietnam.
"I am the law and the law is not mocked, / I'll spit his pity right back in his face, / there is nothing on Earth that we share: / it is either Valjean or Javert!" - Inspector Javert, Les Miserables
"YOU BETRAYED THE LAW!"
-Judge Dredd
"You betrayed Shiva!" - Indiana Jones, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
"Top men."
-Raiders of the Lost Ark
"Irgun. One of my best."
"If you say so."
-- The Lord Marshal and Riddick, The Chronicles of Riddick.
"We're here because you're looking for the best of the best of the best, sir!" - Marine officer (I think), MIB
"Soldiers deserve soldiers, sir!"
-Sgt. Todd, Soldier
"Homeless people with a wrecking ball... driving a nail down the soldiers' bodies!"
--Nervous Doctor, Deus Ex (Malkavian Mod)
"Kill me!"
-Nervous Doctor, Deus Ex (Malkavian Mod)
"...(smile) No."
-Isildur, The Fellowship of the Ring
"'Poor Smeagol' will get into real hot water when the water boils if he don't do as he's asked. Sam'll stick his head in it, O yes, precious."
--Sam Gamgee, Lord of the Rings
"I will break him."
-Witch King, about Gandalf, Return of the King.
"You put me on a huge column? I cast Feather Fall and walk off."
-- Full Frontal Nerdity, I think, talking about Gandalf's imprisonment in the tower.
"Oh my gods, Dad, reality check! Julia is 16 years old and a 3rd-level wizard! Xykon has 100 years and 7 spell levels on her! What could she possibly do against him that I couldn't?!?"
"Feather Fall."
- Roy and Eugene, Order of the Stick
"Let all the poisons that lurk in the mud, hatch out."
--Emperor Claudius, I, Claudius
"Remember, if we touch just one of the ggs they'll all hatch...."
-Leader of Leroy Jankins' party (Adventure Quest version)
"Golden boy with feet of clay,
Let me help you on your way.
A proper push will take you far,
But what a clumsy lad you are!"
Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, Lord Foul's Bane.
"As we reach the end of our civilisation, it is perhaps a sign of the times that tea-drinking in our fair land is sadly on the decline.
The byways are void of any tea, and all you can get is that disgusting drink, coffee. The situation is very grave. Something must be done."
--George Orwell, "Drink tea, for the love of God", Kula Shaker
Black coffee
Well you hear that
Some black tea
Well it can't compare with me
That's right
Black tea well it's as good as
It's as good as
It's as good as it can be
But it's a cup of black coffee
That a working man needs to see
~"Black Coffee"- Humble Pie
"I like my coffee black. The same way I like my brain-damaged neurologists."
- Dr. Gregory House
There is a neurologist, a woman over at Harvard who wanted me to come talk to them, and in France I have a lot of readers in the sciences. I can't tell you why. -- Jim Harrison
:januscat
"One grows tired of jellybabies. One grows tired of everything... except absolute power!"
--The Fourth Doctor, Invasion of Time
"Power; there's never enough of it, or too much of it, or it doesn't do what you want it to." Thomas Covenant- White Gold Wielder.
"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."
-Abraham Lincoln
Bizarrely, I can't think of a good quote about power, character or adversity, so:
"The edge of this hill is the edge of the world
And if you're going to cross, you'd better start doing it right"
--Genesis, Dance on a Volcano
"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly."
-Richard Bach
"Oh f__kin' 'ell, what's that, Nick?!
Well, now, Don't start changing f__king reels in the middle of a take!"
--John Lennon, "Oh My Love", 1971
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=7B21cu38tFI
"In the halls of my mind, I cry "injustice" but I know the universe is not set in accord with my notions of equity"
Nine Princes in Amber, Roger Zelazny.
"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
- Douglas Adams