The Clockwork Mansion

The Grand Hallway => The Outer Fortress => Topic started by: Dakata on May 09, 2008, 05:23:54 PM

Title: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Dakata on May 09, 2008, 05:23:54 PM
[I shit you not.] (http://www.local6.com/news/16169506/detail.html)

QuoteTeacher Jim Piculas does a magic trick where a toothpick disappears and then reappears.

Piculas recently did the 30-second trick in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes.

Piculas said he then got a call from the supervisor of teachers, saying he'd been accused of wizardry.

"I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue, you can't take any more assignments you need to come in right away,'" he said.

Piculas said he did not know of any other accusations that would have led to the action.

The teacher said he is concerned that the incident may prevent him from getting future jobs.

The only solution is to look for Hogwarts and every other wizard/witch school, and burn them down! That'll show them wand-waving monsters. :rolleyes
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: James StarRunner on May 09, 2008, 06:24:51 PM
Getting fired for being religious, fired for being a heathen, fired for getting screwed in between. There's just no winning these days.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Sunblink on May 09, 2008, 06:26:49 PM
If a teacher at my school made a toothpick disappear, I'd be pretty darn impressed. Magic. Screw Algebra and the pH scale, I want to learn how to saw my sister in half.

But I'm pretty shocked that people can be fired over something so... petty. People are so uptight today.

~Keaton the Black Jackal
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: bill on May 09, 2008, 06:27:42 PM
florida



lol
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Sunblink on May 09, 2008, 06:29:02 PM
Quote from: bill on May 09, 2008, 06:27:42 PM
florida



lol

WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME AND MY PATHETIC LITTLE STATE? :<

That does it.

I'm moving to Sweden.

~Keaton the Black Jackal
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Jigsaw Forte on May 09, 2008, 06:50:36 PM
Where the hell is "The Masked Magician" When you need him?

I'm sorry, anyone who can explain away BEHEADING and getting explodied while nailed inside a crate has got to be used as proof that any idiot who believes magic tricks are real (past the age of... oh, I dunno, somewhere around the time you start noticing hair in fun new places) needs to be fired, not this guy.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Aisha deCabre on May 09, 2008, 07:21:48 PM
...

That has to be the stupidest reason for getting fired.  So stupid in fact that "stupid" isn't the word for it.  Moronic...megawfulnormously stupid...

Bah.  Next thing you know, even the word "magic" could get you hanged.  Again.   :rolleyes
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Tapewolf on May 09, 2008, 07:59:19 PM
He'll probably make a fortune in the discrimination lawsuit.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Valynth on May 09, 2008, 08:11:21 PM
It appears I must make the obvious joke.  Did he weigh as much as a duck?

*is pelted with various rotten foods*

Seriously, I think the guy should sue for wrongful termination.  If performing parlor tricks is illegal, every showman in the U.S. is in trouble and Nevada would cease to exist as a populated state.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Zina on May 09, 2008, 10:10:49 PM
I want to be fired because I'm a wizard.
That'd be cool.
"Why did you get fired?" "BECAUSE I AM JUST SO FULL OF MAGIC."
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Zedd on May 09, 2008, 10:49:12 PM
Well now..Looks like I am gonna have to choke someone tonight
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: techmaster-glitch on May 09, 2008, 11:43:44 PM
Quote from: Dak on May 09, 2008, 05:23:54 PM
[I shit you not.] (http://www.local6.com/news/16169506/detail.html)

QuoteTeacher Jim Piculas does a magic trick where a toothpick disappears and then reappears.

Piculas recently did the 30-second trick in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes.

Piculas said he then got a call from the supervisor of teachers, saying he'd been accused of wizardry.

"I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue, you can't take any more assignments you need to come in right away,'" he said.

Piculas said he did not know of any other accusations that would have led to the action.

The teacher said he is concerned that the incident may prevent him from getting future jobs.

The only solution is to look for Hogwarts and every other wizard/witch school, and burn them down! That'll show them wand-waving monsters. :rolleyes
Reminds me more of Salem than Hogwarts.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Brunhidden on May 10, 2008, 01:48:51 AM
really makes me wonder about my old science teacher and all his 'magic tricks' such as using a banana as a hammer, making water boil at room temperature, and making a marshmallow explode.

next time on overreaction theatre- Mr. Clean is burned at the stake for his 'magic' eraser
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Gareeku on May 10, 2008, 04:06:35 AM
Quote from: Zina on May 09, 2008, 10:10:49 PM
I want to be fired because I'm a wizard.
That'd be cool.
"Why did you get fired?" "BECAUSE I AM JUST SO FULL OF MAGIC."

Rofl

U win yo.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: bill on May 10, 2008, 10:17:13 AM
I'd just like to reiterate that Florida can vote. You know, for president.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Valynth on May 10, 2008, 02:32:10 PM
Yes, Bill, we all know it's because of Florida that we're stuck with our current monke-er, President.

So this kind of insanity is common for Florida.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Gabi on May 10, 2008, 02:33:41 PM
Congratulations, Dakata, you've just ruined one of the stories I was trying to write.

Anyway... who would fire a teacher just for making a fun trick?
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Rakala on May 10, 2008, 04:41:54 PM
Quote from: Keaton the Black Jackal on May 09, 2008, 06:29:02 PM
Quote from: bill on May 09, 2008, 06:27:42 PM
florida



lol

WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME AND MY PATHETIC LITTLE STATE? :<

That does it.

I'm moving to Sweden.

~Keaton the Black Jackal
Hey, I live in Kansas. I have to deal with Fred Phelps.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: R.A.M. on May 10, 2008, 07:10:19 PM
wow...that sucks,and is funny as hell.
wizardry
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Angel on May 10, 2008, 07:20:08 PM
Heard about this in Humanities... weren't there more reasons than wizardry for firing the guy? Some reports said he was a pretty lazy teacher...

But yeah, the wizardry thing is pretty stupid. I mean, you wouldn't arrest someone for the coin-in-the-ear trick.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Dakata on May 10, 2008, 07:33:55 PM
Quote from: Gabi on May 10, 2008, 02:33:41 PM
Congratulations, Dakata, you've just ruined one of the stories I was trying to write.

Anyway... who would fire a teacher just for making a fun trick?
I'm sorry. :c What kind of story?

Who you ask? Someone who's crazy and/or stupid. It's not like he's sawing a kid in half or teaching kids to sell their souls to the devil. Seriously.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: rabid_fox on May 10, 2008, 07:35:47 PM

There's got to be more to it than has been reported.

I would dearly like to believe that statement, but I have a friend who has, in writing, an official contract termination where the reason given was "Smiled too much".

Yes. He was fired for smiling too much.

In a sandwich factory.

Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Zedd on May 11, 2008, 04:26:57 AM
Quote from: rabid_fox on May 10, 2008, 07:35:47 PM

There's got to be more to it than has been reported.

I would dearly like to believe that statement, but I have a friend who has, in writing, an official contract termination where the reason given was "Smiled too much".

Yes. He was fired for smiling too much.

In a sandwich factory.
Cant help the sandwitches was so good :<
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on May 11, 2008, 09:47:12 PM
Quote from: Black_angel on May 10, 2008, 07:20:08 PM
But yeah, the wizardry thing is pretty stupid. I mean, you wouldn't arrest someone for the coin-in-the-ear trick.

Coin in the ear?!   :U

BURN THE WITCH!!!

:mob
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Valynth on May 11, 2008, 10:00:19 PM
Quote from: Alondro on May 11, 2008, 09:47:12 PM
Quote from: Black_angel on May 10, 2008, 07:20:08 PM
But yeah, the wizardry thing is pretty stupid. I mean, you wouldn't arrest someone for the coin-in-the-ear trick.
Coin in the ear?!   :U

BURN THE WITCH!!!

And thus a plentiful new alternate energy source was found.  Good job Alondro, you saved the world from the oil crisis and over population in one shot.  I admit, I'm impressed.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on May 12, 2008, 09:47:16 AM
It be cuz I dun wents ta collej.  I gots me dem smartz.   :B
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Victoire Épique on May 12, 2008, 10:13:51 AM
Quote from: Valynth on May 11, 2008, 10:00:19 PM
Quote from: Alondro on May 11, 2008, 09:47:12 PM
Quote from: Black_angel on May 10, 2008, 07:20:08 PM
But yeah, the wizardry thing is pretty stupid. I mean, you wouldn't arrest someone for the coin-in-the-ear trick.
Coin in the ear?!   :U

BURN THE WITCH!!!

And thus a plentiful new alternate energy source was found.  Good job Alondro, you saved the world from the oil crisis and over population in one shot.  I admit, I'm impressed.
Also, with less people, there will be less food used, meaning more food unused, thus food will become more readily available in areas that are stricken by famine.
And if famine is solved, then a lot of the population would become fit and able to work, allowing boons in technology and farming and other such things.
The global economy would improve, and all in all the world would become a much better place.

Alondro, your idea to burn the witch was genius. Totally admirable.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on May 12, 2008, 04:09:59 PM
I'm very adept and Jonothan Swift's 'modest proposal'...

Except I want to enact it literally.   :mwaha

*Zina takes another shot*  Bwah ha ha!
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Kenji on May 12, 2008, 06:42:49 PM
Lawl education facilities. Would they have been mad if he pulled money out of ears and donated it to the school?
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Turnsky on May 14, 2008, 04:07:35 AM
pfft, teachers and schools have been making children's self esteem disappear since the dawn of education
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Jigsaw Forte on May 14, 2008, 11:14:49 AM
Quote from: Victoire Épique on May 12, 2008, 10:13:51 AM
Quote from: Valynth on May 11, 2008, 10:00:19 PM
Quote from: Alondro on May 11, 2008, 09:47:12 PM
Quote from: Black_angel on May 10, 2008, 07:20:08 PM
But yeah, the wizardry thing is pretty stupid. I mean, you wouldn't arrest someone for the coin-in-the-ear trick.
Coin in the ear?!   :U

BURN THE WITCH!!!

And thus a plentiful new alternate energy source was found.  Good job Alondro, you saved the world from the oil crisis and over population in one shot.  I admit, I'm impressed.
Also, with less people, there will be less food used, meaning more food unused, thus food will become more readily available in areas that are stricken by famine.
And if famine is solved, then a lot of the population would become fit and able to work, allowing boons in technology and farming and other such things.
The global economy would improve, and all in all the world would become a much better place.

Alondro, your idea to burn the witch was genius. Totally admirable.

Famine is not just a case of "having enough food". Transportation and Contamination concerns are also an issue; ESPECIALLY when the food in question is something "simple" like vegetables. (And when I say contamination, this includes introducing eco-harmful plants as well as whatever bugs / germs they contain).

The answer to solving famine lies more in improved agriculture more than it does "merely having more food than you can eat".

Also, chickens.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on May 14, 2008, 06:59:42 PM
My way works better!  Nyah!
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Kenji on May 16, 2008, 01:13:26 AM
I agree with Charline for once. >_>
<_<
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Victoire Épique on May 17, 2008, 09:29:46 PM
Quote from: Jigsaw Forte on May 14, 2008, 11:14:49 AM
Quote from: Victoire Épique on May 12, 2008, 10:13:51 AM
Also, with less people, there will be less food used, meaning more food unused, thus food will become more readily available in areas that are stricken by famine.
And if famine is solved, then a lot of the population would become fit and able to work, allowing boons in technology and farming and other such things.
The global economy would improve, and all in all the world would become a much better place.

Alondro, your idea to burn the witch was genius. Totally admirable.
Famine is not just a case of "having enough food". Transportation and Contamination concerns are also an issue; ESPECIALLY when the food in question is something "simple" like vegetables. (And when I say contamination, this includes introducing eco-harmful plants as well as whatever bugs / germs they contain).

The answer to solving famine lies more in improved agriculture more than it does "merely having more food than you can eat".

Also, chickens.

But it's less fun if you don't jump to conclusions.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Azriel on June 04, 2008, 08:13:05 PM
Quote from: techmaster-glitch on May 09, 2008, 11:43:44 PM
Quote from: Dak on May 09, 2008, 05:23:54 PM
[I shit you not.] (http://www.local6.com/news/16169506/detail.html)

QuoteTeacher Jim Piculas does a magic trick where a toothpick disappears and then reappears.

Piculas recently did the 30-second trick in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes.

Piculas said he then got a call from the supervisor of teachers, saying he'd been accused of wizardry.

"I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue, you can't take any more assignments you need to come in right away,'" he said.

Piculas said he did not know of any other accusations that would have led to the action.

The teacher said he is concerned that the incident may prevent him from getting future jobs.

The only solution is to look for Hogwarts and every other wizard/witch school, and burn them down! That'll show them wand-waving monsters. :rolleyes
Reminds me more of Salem than Hogwarts.
Yeah I'll second that one.  This is funny though whats next for schools "We will not allow our teachers to be Wican, Muslim, Christian, Jews, Taoist, and even if you don't show your faith no matter what it is we'll still fire you"
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Jack McSlay on June 05, 2008, 12:40:32 AM
hmm witches used to be set on fire, teacher fired for wizardry.... I wonder if that' s the origin for the word "fired"
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Zorro on June 05, 2008, 02:18:19 AM
But environmentalists are all about burning witches.



There are these "Wizards" called Genetic Engineers.  They do allsorts of magic like create rot resistant tomatoes and add vitamin A to rice to prevent blindness.

For such Dark "Magic" as this they want the Genetic Engineering "Wizards" killed or imprisoned for not letting tomatoes rot because it rained at the wrong time or letting people go blind in Asia because they are too poor to buy carrots.   :erk
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on June 05, 2008, 07:30:47 PM
I genetically engineer mice.

We're developing a strain that will burn environmentalists.   >:3
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Valynth on June 06, 2008, 01:16:22 AM
Quote from: Alondro on June 05, 2008, 07:30:47 PM
I genetically engineer mice.

We're developing a strain that will burn environmentalists.   >:3

We already have that, it's called mouse+napalm+match.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: shadowterm on June 06, 2008, 01:23:21 AM
Quote from: Valynth on June 06, 2008, 01:16:22 AM
Quote from: Alondro on June 05, 2008, 07:30:47 PM
I genetically engineer mice.

We're developing a strain that will burn environmentalists.   >:3

We already have that, it's called mouse+napalm+match.
yeah, just don't try to stomp the mouse out. The fire getts everywhere. everywhere
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Raffe on June 06, 2008, 02:22:25 AM
Quote from: Valynth on June 06, 2008, 01:16:22 AM
Quote from: Alondro on June 05, 2008, 07:30:47 PM
I genetically engineer mice.

We're developing a strain that will burn environmentalists.   >:3

We already have that, it's called mouse+napalm+match.
reminds me of the roman fire pigs, coat a pig in flammable stuffs, release towards enemy, set on fire.

EDIT:found a link http://www.militaryfactory.com/smallarms/detail.asp?smallarms_id=148
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Valynth on June 06, 2008, 02:31:43 AM
Quote from: Deebs' giraffe on June 06, 2008, 02:22:25 AM
Quote from: Valynth on June 06, 2008, 01:16:22 AM
Quote from: Alondro on June 05, 2008, 07:30:47 PM
I genetically engineer mice.

We're developing a strain that will burn environmentalists.   >:3

We already have that, it's called mouse+napalm+match.
reminds me of the roman fire pigs, coat a pig in flammable stuffs, release towards enemy, set on fire.

I always thought of those as ancient MRE's.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on June 06, 2008, 09:39:02 AM
These mice will be more like smart bombs.  They'll spontaneously ignite upon contact with PETA and ALF members.  It is well known that such people carry the protein product of the RETARD1 gene, which is recognized by a recombinant receptor in the mice, linked to the spontaneous combustion pathway.   :P
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: AngelSephy on June 08, 2008, 09:08:22 PM
Quote from: Alondro on May 11, 2008, 09:47:12 PM
Quote from: Black_angel on May 10, 2008, 07:20:08 PM
But yeah, the wizardry thing is pretty stupid. I mean, you wouldn't arrest someone for the coin-in-the-ear trick.

Coin in the ear?!   :U

BURN THE WITCH!!!

:mob

Oh god... I laughed so hard from that. Thank you for making my day!  :boogie

As for the topic: I'm just at a loss for words! How the hell do you get fired for making a toothpick disappear? :<
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Azriel on June 10, 2008, 03:59:39 PM
Quote from: Alondro on June 06, 2008, 09:39:02 AM
These mice will be more like smart bombs.  They'll spontaneously ignite upon contact with PETA and ALF members.  It is well known that such people carry the protein product of the RETARD1 gene, which is recognized by a recombinant receptor in the mice, linked to the spontaneous combustion pathway.   :P
:mwaha that...wow thats one of the best posts on a forum I've seen in a long tome  :eager
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Alondro on June 10, 2008, 04:25:31 PM
Quote from: Azriel on June 10, 2008, 03:59:39 PM
Quote from: Alondro on June 06, 2008, 09:39:02 AM
These mice will be more like smart bombs.  They'll spontaneously ignite upon contact with PETA and ALF members.  It is well known that such people carry the protein product of the RETARD1 gene, which is recognized by a recombinant receptor in the mice, linked to the spontaneous combustion pathway.   :P
:mwaha that...wow thats one of the best posts on a forum I've seen in a long tome  :eager

*Charles R geneticist.  Him R smart.*  C M AIR?  M R Mice.  M R Not.  O S A R.  C M BD Eyes?  C M E D B D Feet?  L I B, M R Mice!  :B
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: llearch n'n'daCorna on June 10, 2008, 04:45:39 PM
You're welcome.
Title: Re: Sub. teacher fired for wizardry
Post by: Auron on June 11, 2008, 02:02:32 PM
Human versus (1) hume. It's becoming the later all to often it seems, oh well, I'm actualy getting used to seeing things like this... Which, now that I've said that, might actualy hurt even more since it means I'm slowly losing my own humanity! >_o'

Dang it, why won't people stop being so stupid, it's starting to desensitize me!! ~hudles over his soul to protect it.~ It's PREEeeecIIiiious!!

(1) Hume, Noun, a homo-sapien which, by some means, shows little or no sign of humanity.