[Story] A Matter of Trust. (DMFA Universe / Partial Crossover)

Started by Dressari, July 02, 2014, 10:40:32 PM

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Dressari

...Okay, um, first off I'd like to mention that I am incredibly frigging nervous about even mentioning this piece of work let alone showing it around on a forum full of users that are fans of the DMFA Universe. I have been sitting on this decision for perhaps almost several months, and now I've decided to just go with it because... why the hell not I guess.

I wrote this story, on a whim I might add, nearly 4+ years ago, when you're bored at a customer service desk at work one day you tend to get lots of ideas flailing around in your head. Some better than others, I have no idea if this was one of my better ideas or silly ideas. Either way I decided to put the pen to the paper, make something up and then roll with it. What came of it was a 100+ page story that I didn't even expect to get past 50 pages let alone 100.

...Then I had the lapse judgement of sending this story to Amber as a show of respect that I borrowed her characters and universe. Yeah... imagine my hasty decision to decide that the story could have been miles better, and in another prompt e-mail saying I was going to do better and to ignore it. And so... I ended up with instead a 150+ page story, illustrated by an artist, briefly edited by a webcomic writer. And sorta skimmed by a few friends before I sent a new version. I would be very surprised if Amber ever did find the time to read it so I don't hold her to it, like I said I sent a copy because I respect he to let her know someone created work from her universe and characters. Much <3 for Amber's writing skills no doubt.

ANYWAY... That said, I figure it was about time I put it up somewhere to be known a little more publicly. But before you read it, I would like to point out a few things:


  • 1. This is a work of fiction, NON-CANNON to both the DMFA universe and my own character(s)
  • 2. I wrote this on a whim, I didn't expect to turn this into something this bigger. I'm not the best writer, but I am a simple writer I am not very big on lavish descriptions or large vocabularies.
  • 3. Yes I know it's a cross over fiction, what started as a whimsy became not only an experiment, but a very VERY large learning experience for myself in many ways. Mimicking character personalities, sticking to correct lore, trying to insert an unusual character without being out of place is a lot damn harder than it appears. I spent months researching the characters and the archives to try and stick to correct things as I could
  • 4. This was written back long before we knew more about Destania and Biggs's goals or what they're getting upto. I often re-wrote a few areas to match their personalities a bit better, but hey, working by the seat of my pants here. Amber is a fantastic writer, and I already know I cannot match upto her standards. This story tends to follow a more serious tone than the comedy tone we're used to.
  • 5. I have no problem with feedback, I have no problem with help trying to improve my writing. But please don't jump on me with opinions on how you think a character should act compared to how I've written it, yes I will admit I may be or likely am wrong but I will only take the creator's word on that front.
  • 6. Finally, I have done my very best not to make my own character seem OP, or "Mary Sue". I don't like seeing either myself, but I can't help people's opinions despite however I would write a character.

I do apologize for the very long introduction, I just wanted to get that out there first. So with no more delays, I hope someone will enjoy my little side take on the DMFA universe. And if not? Well... At least I worked up the balls to get it on here finally. Right?

A Matter of Trust - Dropbox link for easy download. 16.34Mb (It has at least 20+ images in it)

Front Page, as Illustrated by Nicole Riley

Meany

The amount of work you've put into the disclaimer makes me warm in the black iciness of my heart.  Also reminds me I need to put one on my story later.  Going to say now, considering you posted only a little while ago and the fic is... one hundred and fifty-nine pages long Jesus nailed to a cross, that's long, not done reading yet.

The cover art gives me hope, and I will post again when done reading.  So far, so good.

Dressari

Quote from: Meany on July 02, 2014, 10:54:15 PM
The amount of work you've put into the disclaimer makes me warm in the black iciness of my heart.  Also reminds me I need to put one on my story later.  Going to say now, considering you posted only a little while ago and the fic is... one hundred and fifty-nine pages long Jesus nailed to a cross, that's long, not done reading yet.

The cover art gives me hope, and I will post again when done reading.  So far, so good.

This, probably made me chuckle a lot more than you intended to. Thank you I really need to smile after feeling so nerve racked.

VAE

The front page is making me intrigued since Destania is one of my favourite characters in the comic. Will have a good look at this when I come from work.
What i cannot create, i do not understand. - Richard P. Feynman
This is DMFA. Where major species don't understand clothing. So innuendo is overlooked for nuendo. .
Saphroneth



Dressari

*Peaks in* Soooooo... anyone with some thoughts so far? :)

Meany

Well, Destania seems a bit out of character.  The idea of a cryogenic human being woken up is interesting, and I'm working through the rather long story.  I wish the backstories were more fluidly mixed, but I don't even know the crossover being referenced here, so it might not have been possible.  The story is good, and the illustrations are fun treats.  I am enjoying the story.

Dressari

Quote from: Meany on July 14, 2014, 07:37:55 PM
Well, Destania seems a bit out of character.  The idea of a cryogenic human being woken up is interesting, and I'm working through the rather long story.  I wish the backstories were more fluidly mixed, but I don't even know the crossover being referenced here, so it might not have been possible.  The story is good, and the illustrations are fun treats.  I am enjoying the story.

Yeeeeeaaah, even when I was writing it I expected she would appear off. She was one of the two most difficult characters to write about and mimic their personalities for me. Honestly with the limited knowledge we still have of Destania, I highly doubt much of anything I could have written would look correct. I rolled with it as best as I could at the time, pretty much my own take of how I "beleive" she might act in certain situations.

When you get a chance, you'll have to tell me more about what you mean about the backstory mixing, admittedly the universe is of my own and it is webcomic in production called Creators: Keepers of Mana. Thing is its been on hiatus for many years due to problems with finding a stable artist and I have 100's of pages ready for production. What I wrote here ended up becoming a side project just to throw me off the beaten path of familiarly and practice something different. I only tried to explain what was important for this story and without making the details too overwhelming, or from spoiling too much from my own universe. Like I said before, I had way too much time to think about stuff at work one day.  :bored

I'm glad you like it so far, and your honest input so far has already given me a bit to think about and look over the story again myself.