Corrupt a Wish, Part Trois

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, someone makes a movie out of War and Peace.  But no one's interested anyway.

I wish I could turn a complete chunk of lead into an equally sized and weight chunk of gold.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

I wish that someone would make a GOOD movie based off of a big book (LOTR was pretty good though, the Harry Potter moveis are just meh, I don't particularly like them, and the Eragon movie was so ungodly awful that the director must burn in hell for all eternity for that abomination)

Granted. However, it triggers the End Of The World As We Know It, and I Feel Fine. Everyone else, on the other hand, is a little annoyed at you.

BTW, the Eragon book wasn't anything to write home about, either. Fluff and mind candy, but nothing serious in it. Heck, Maurice And His Amazing Educated Rodents, or even The Wee Free Men had more body to it.

I wish I could turn a complete chunk of lead into an equally sized and weight chunk of gold.

Granted, only it turns out to be gold plated. After you sell it. Half to the Russian mob, half to the Mafia, and half to the Yakuza. All of them are somewhat annoyed to be a) short-weighted, and b) sold gold that isn't. I'd suggest running away, but really, you can't run far or fast enough...


I wish I'd managed to pack up and go home a half an hour ago when I started leaving.

[Angel]

Granted, but you run out of gas halfway down the Interstate.

I wish I had a little time to install American McGee's Alice now that I have it.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but all you can do is install it.  You can't actually play it.  You have far too many other things to do before you can sit down and play.  Which should be in about, ohh, 10 years.

I wish all problems could be peacefully solved with the push of a button, but without anyone getting hurt or killed or mutated or anything like that.

[Angel]

Granted, but pretty soon new problems start up. Other than that, I can't see a way this wish could be corrupted. You are a worthy opponent. (bows)

I wish people would stop using drugs irresponsibly.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Instead, they start using glue irresponsibly, and do nice, sane things like gluing a shotgun to their forehead.

And everyone blames you, too, for solving all the problems and leaving people with nothing to do by hot-glue-gun shotguns to their foreheads.


I wish the forum goers, en masse, were more intelligent. Especially the next poster.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but then everyone gets into heated debates about important global issues that would make most global-summit-goers gape in awe, and, as most arguments on the internet tend to do, the whole thing invariably devolves into a huge flame war... but at least people are more intelligent about their flames.

I wish all people were peaceful by nature.

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted. All people become peaceful by nature, but anything that isn't person becomes violent warmongering beasts, and all people are driven to extinction, because they were too peaceful to fight back.

I wish I could think of a wish to wish for.

[Kryptic]

Granted - However, you become mysteriously mute, illiterate, and unable to write. How curious....

I wish I had three more hours in a day.

[Josh Massa]

Granted. But due to this fact, you also have 3 more longs hours of school each day. Bwahaha 



I wish I were the best guitarist ever.

[KarlOmega1]

Granted, your guitar skills are excellent...but your singing is horrible.

I wish I could adopt Xze after seeing that one pic she drew.... (the one which Xze in the box)

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted Xze now has the mentality of a housecat, and wakes you up at odd ours of the morning...usually around 1, 3, 5, and again at 9.  Her whimpering gets on your nerves and after using the litterbox she has recently started rubbing her butt on the carpet, You take her to the vet and discover she has maggots in her intestines and infestation is so bad they have to put her to sleep....and then there is the matter of the $15,000 vet bills. (sorry Xze)

I wish for a flying carpet. 

[Josh Massa]

Granted...but it mysteriously catches fire over the Atlantic ocean and you drown....after being nibble on by sharks for 3 days.



I wish I could spend more time with my girlfriend.   (oh boy to this one)

[Roureem Egas]

Granted. However, your girlfriend is starting to drop hints about wanting some space.

I wish I actually had more to contribute to discussions rather than haunt the place.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but in every single one of your "contributions" you make every single spelling error listed in your avatar and constantly forget to edit your posts.

I wish I had telekinisis.

[Roureem Egas]

(How should I take that? <_<)

Granted. You now have a psychic power that lets you get tissues from a mile away.

I wish my brother didn't spill anything on my laptop today.

[Unreliabel Dragon]

Granted your brother will spill something on your laptop tommorow

I wish i could control peoples minds

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted.

However, you can only control peoples minds when they're watching pornography, and only to keep them stuck there.


I wish I had a more eloquent corruption for that wish.

[Eibborn]

You do. The only problem is that whenever you try to type it up, it comes out as gibberish. Recording it leaves you with nothing but white noise, and your hand spasms whenever you try to make a video of the sign language.
Bummer, eh?

I wish for a stopwatch made of pure awesome.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. It stopped.


I wish for a cup of tea.

[keithinmn]

Granted.  Although, the tea is from and old Lipton tea bag that I believe dates back to 1976.

I wish I could stop getting old.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, you died young.

I wish I could control the flow of time.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted you now own an hourglass that does just that, only you broke it and it is unrepairable.

I wish for an autographed copy of the latest spider man move

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted. But you can't do the "move" cuz ur not spider-man. 

I wish that humanity had perfect recycling technology.

[Angel]

Granted, but everyone is still too frickin' lazy to use it. Nothing really changes.

I wish I was immune to sunburn.

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted. Instead, you are hyper-succeptible to frostbite instead.

I wish mows were real.

[Arcalane]

Granted. Mows invade the world and devour practically everything, including people, since this particular batch turned out to be carnivorous.

Oops.

I wish llearch would stop making such awful puns.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. As a result, you're stuck with the pun-ishment.



I wish I had had breakfast today.

[Josh Massa]

Granted...but that was the last time you will ever have breakfast since you ate ALL THE FOOD IN THE UNIVERSE.
Have fun searching for more in an alternate dimension.


I wish that people wouldn't lie.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted,  the wealthy thank you for making it that much easier to exploit the average person



i wish for footage of whale flatulence, and a hundred pounds  of whale poop was researched on the international space station.