Corrupt a Wish, Part Deux

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, now all cliffhangers end up being like the ending of PotC2.  And we all know how everyone felt about that.

I wish I had more funny and relevant webcomic references to put in my posts.

[GabrielsThoughts]

Granted, the entire database of onlinecomics.net, comicgenisis, DrunkDuck,Smackjeeves,and Google gets uploaded into your brain, unfortunately more than 95% of the comics and Manga consist of porn. This causes you to experience several orgasms in succession, like most males experiencing an orgasm you've stop breathing. luckily, You died with a smile on your face and blood trickling out of your nose

[a/n: Personally I've never had an orgasm, but apparently it is the leading cause of college age deaths among males in the United States. Appearantly  they ones who die, forget to breathe while playing...er reading the articles in magazines filled with pictures of nude models.]

I wish for unlimited power and control over Las Vegas.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but remember, power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.  This comes true as you immediately abuse your power and then in a moment of inattentiveness, you're taken out by a rival who in turn will later be taken out by a rival, and so on and so forth in that fashion.  Eventually the government decides that it's all more trouble than it's worth and turns Las Vegas itself into a test site for small scale nuclear weapons.

I wish I could be an admin for a popular webcomic forum.

[Valynth]

Granted, however your tyrannical use of the Admin powers causes everyone to leave the forums and the comic quickly becomes unpopular.

I wish I was not allergic to alcohol. (A trait I inherited from my father)

[lucas marcone]

granted but you are so joyous that you go celebrateing and drink way too much you die smelling like a bad stereotype.


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[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. Unfortunately, nobody else can read your elite code, and you die unappreciated by any of your peers.

... and living in a cardboard box by the side of the road.



I wish I was a little less abrupt with people who wasted my time. (no, not you, lucas.)

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, No one knows the meaning of abrupt, therefore you can neither be abrupt nor less abrupt...and now everyone wastes your time.

I wish for lots of free stuff.

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted. You own, and live in, a garbage dump, and every day garbage trucks come by and give you free "stuff".

I wish it were possible Droids to be Jedi, instead of an endless parade of meatbags.
Robot+Lightsaber+Force=OWNAGE.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but they don't have the ability to be either good or evil and so they all stay neutral and either get killed off by the dark side for being useless or employed by the light side to do menial tasks.

I wish to see an amazing lightsaber duel between giant statues of all four of the presidents in Mt. Rushmore.

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted, but the massive electromagnetic fields produced by the massively huge lightsabers that the statues use completly disrupts all communications and defensive countermeasures in the US, and all of our enemies in the world, seeing our weakness, come and bomb the shit out of us, leaving America nothimg more than a blackend wasteland. The statues are also smashed to rubble. And before the bombing started, on of the statues steped on you, cuz you had to have that front-row seat to get the best view of the battle.

I wish that Metal Arms: Glitch In The System did a little better with the story, i.e., actually making use of the plot device that Glitch was (supposedly) a Morbot, not a Droid or a Mil.

[e_voyager]

granted but you are hit by a system killer virus and we'll it's a sad sad thing.

i wish for more reboot related names on this forum.

[Roureem Egas]

Granted. The number of Reboot-themed names increases to he point that it's become a cookie-cutter name with no originality. And sadly, it comes to reflect the posters who picked those names (unimaginative, mostly).

I wish hay fever wasn't so strong. >_>

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, and since it's not so strong it can be cured easily... unfortunately a supermutant strain of the flu took it's place.

I wish I could always roll critical successes in every attack and skill check in D&D without using loaded dice.

[Roureem Egas]

Granted. You'll still be accused of cheating, so someone else has to roll for you.

I wish Philosophy class wasn't such a drag.

[GabrielsThoughts]

Granted, you receive the power of enlightenment when you realize the class is all about  learning the difference between Spiritualism, Materialism, and Discovering the question to the nature of reality, because the mice are curious to know why the answer is 42.

I wish for knowledge of all the events that will transpire within the next 30 years.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, and the very next thing that happens is that you're in a completely unavoidable and terrible car accident that leaves you a deaf-mute paraplegiac with broken hands so you can't even use one of those teletype things, so all you can do is sit back and watch it all happen.

I wish I could change the moods and emotions of individual people at will.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, Unfortunately a mad scientist has decided to use you as part of his body swapping research...guess whose body your switched with, MINE! enjoy the next 30 years of my life, I'll be enjoying every minute of yours.


I wish I could find anything lost.

[e_voyager]

granted but you lose everything you find moments later. ah well.

i wish i have seen all of the mini arcs  including the one on fashion that i missed half of.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. However, you forget totally the plot, and don't even realise that they're over in the Demo 101 page.



I wish I was a little more helpful.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but then everyone starts shouting "POD-PERSON!" at you and then clubs you to death.

I wish the bad points of Mac's outweighed their good points and the good points of PC's outweighed their bad points.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, however a new computer developed from alien technology borrowed from area 51 replaces PC's and Mac's leaving you wondering why everyone disapproves of human tech.


I wish for a robot monkey that I can control with my mind.

[Roureem Egas]

Granted. The downside to controlling the monkey robot with your mind is that your mind is actually transferred to the robot. Your real body just sits that glazed like a zombie. Did I mention the robot's defunct?

I wish my work for Gen. Studies would be over already.

[Ryudo Lee]

Granted, but you rushed it, and since you rushed it you did an awful job so... 

I wish for an end to spam in all of it's forms.

[Angel]

Granted... but now there are more magazine advertisements than ever before... In fact, magazine articles are just endless ad space. (Whether MAD will be spared is unconfirmed.)

I wish I was better at chemistry.

[Roureem Egas]

Granted. This kind of chemistry you become better at really just applies to bakery. (probably isn't that much of a corruption, is it? )

I wish I didn't have such strange thoughts when I'm tired. (ex. fascination with tears)

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted, now all your strange thoughs happen when you're wide awake and interacting with other humans, and the strange things you bring up for no reason makes people start to edge away from you veeeery slowly....

I wish I lived in the Starcraft Universe. (Being a Protoss or Zerg instead of a Terran would be fine)

[the name is SPARKS]

granted u now live in the starcraft universe as a zerg but you got killed a little while after birth

i wish i had a sack of potatoes to hit people with

[techmaster-glitch]

Granted, but you end up smacking someone who whished for an M-16 Antitank Rocket Launcher and he blows the s**t outta you and your whimpy sack.

I wish that virtual reality (i.e., your mind inside a computer, or the game inside your mind, that kind of VR) gaming WAS a reality.

[GabrielsThoughts]

granted, unfortunately your mind becomes trapped in a simulation game for twelve hours, but  because of the time displacement experienced in the mind to you it was more like twelve months.


I wish I could fix anything with a roll of duck tape, like Macgyver.

[llearch n'n'daCorna]

Granted. You're immediately arrested for "fix"ing cats, on a "cruelty to animals". *wince*



I wish I was wearing fishnets.